Chapter XI
Anger gave the former Goblin King strength. He didn't think he could ever really feel wrath at Sarah, but this was too much.
How dare she not see? How dare she turn away? Now? NOW, when he told her openly that he loves her, that even though she destroyed his entire world and nearly destroyed him?
And what answer did he get? "You have no power over me".
She was lying to herself, and he knew it. on his own, he had no power over her. But a part of her granted him this power. A part of her believed and was completely open to him.
Maybe that is what made him angrier than he ever thought he could be. He saw the part of her that not only cared for him but wanted him to come to her, to find her, to be with her. He saw that Sarah which would always believe in him, which would always be open to him. And before he could get a good look at that aspect of her Self, which she was for some reason so afraid of, she snatched it away, burning all of her bridges behind her.
How dare she do it?
The control freak inside of her snatched up the reins and steered like mad toward the exit, to get out at any cost.
Why?
Again, he asked himself why she did this to herself, and again he could come up with no answer.
But now he knew that the old, dreaming Sarah was indeed alive within the haunted girl who could not stand his invasion of her dreams. He knew it, and he knew that his connection with her could never be truly broken if she remains alive.
He picked up a piece of charcoal rolling it in the palm of his hand.
He felt much stronger now. He would watch her, he decided. He would watch and wait and build up his strength. He would make her remember what had truly happened.
That it was she who pulled away in the ballroom, that it what she who broke that fragile world and that it was she who destroyed her own dreams and his world.
He remembered her genuine surprise at his words concerning keys to ruin and who was holding them. So, she didn't remember, did she?
She will. Eventually, she will. He'd see to that.
In the meantime, not a single thing she does and thinks will go by unnoticed. He would watch and wait.
Sinking to his knees in front of one piece of a labyrinth wall, Jareth poised the charcoal over it. Bit by bit, the charcoal lines lost the appearance of random strokes and Sarah's face appeared on the crumbling piece of wall… Jareth could remember every move, every expression of hers, every step, every tone of voice…
"Every breath you take
Every move you make
Every bond you break
Every step you take
I'll be watching you…"
Sarah jumped, as the words of the song started to hit her. She was so used to listening to music absentmindedly, without really hearing words in songs, without really paying attention to the whole meaning behind them. Now, for some reason, her ear was caught, and she could not go back to her reading.
"Every single day
Every word you say
Every game you play
Every night you stay
I'll be watching you
Oh can't you see
You belong to me
How my poor heart aches
with every step you take"
She felt a shudder run through her. In vain did she try to tell herself that she was making things up and that it was just a song on the radio. It was really too late for that.
"Every move you make
Every vow you break
Every smile you fake
Every claim you stake
I'll be watching you
Since you've gone I've been lost without a trace
I dream at night I can only see your face
I look around but it's you I can't replace
I feel so cold and I long for your embrace
I keep crying baby, baby please"
Biting her lip again, she felt herself rocking back and forth, fighting the chills that insisted on using her backbone as a racing track.
"Every move you make
Every vow you break
Every smile you fake
Every claim you stake
I'll be watching you…"
As the song on the radio came to an end, Sarah, who had been biting her lip the whole time, abruptly rose and ran out of the living room, where the whole family was enjoying some time together after dinner. She had been feeling rather relieved to spend some time in the company of her parents this evening, thinking that nothing disturbing could reach her there.
Now the paranoia of being watched intensified to absurdity, and she couldn't sit still unless she was in a corner with her back to something very solid. Every slight rustling made her jump.
Jareth smiled.
Interestingly enough, she just did all that completely on her own.
It meant that their connection was getting stronger, if she could interpret his thoughts without him having to even help her. It's too bad she is still so scared of it. But, oh well – as long as its working, what did it matter?
He would let her realize "by herself" then, since she couldn't handle him telling her straight out.
It was easier on him, anyway. But, unfortunately, a slower process.
Now, what was he going to have her "discover" next?
Ah, yes. The Ballroom scene. And its painful ending.
Goodness, when he sang to her of the world falling down, he had no idea she would take him literally.
And he closed his eyes, remembering the time when he first touched her, held her. When she was so overcome, she had even forgotten to struggle. And for a while he, too, was living out a part of his fantasy. Unfortunately, the memory of it, though vivid, was infinitely less satisfying.