How Can I Forget?

Disclaimer: I am not Meg Cabot! I don't own any of these characters (except Morgan and whoever else I decide to make up)

Summary: If you love something, let it go. Suze loved him, and she let him go. If it was meant to be, Suze knows that something is missing from her life. Him. It will come back to you. She knew that she was supposed to meet someone. Will she spend her whole life waiting for him?

"Suze!" My Mom called me from downstairs. "Wake up!" I sat up in my bed groggily. Ughh. My head. It killed. I looked around my room. Wait… wasn't someone supposed to be here? I looked to the window seat. A gentle breeze came through my open window. Wasn't it supposed to be closed?

"SUZE!"

"I'm coming!" I pulled on a brown mini skirt, a beige tank top and my prized leather jacket and ran downstairs.

"You're going to be late." Mom said, looking concerned. "Are you okay?"

"Um, what?"

Mom frowned, and I had probably just proved her point. "Honey, did something happen between you and Paul?"

Paul. I sighed. He was my boyfriend. I'll get into that later. "No. Nothing. Why?"

She stroked my face. "Honey, you've been crying all night."

I looked in the mirror near the door.

"Ouch." I said to the face staring back at me. Tear tracks full of eyeliner and mascara ran down my cheeks and my eyes were red and puffy.

"I don't remember crying…"

Mom looked at me like I was crazy. "Wash your face honey. Then get to school."

"Okay. See you later." I kissed her on the cheek as she went back into the TV room. To watch the early morning soaps, no doubt.

I washed my face, brushed my teeth and hair, applied makeup and only then was I ready to get to school.

"Bye!" I called into the house as I shut the door. The cool sea breeze hit me, and I began walking down the driveway to my car.

On the way to school, I thought about what Carmel might have looked like in Father D's days. Probably dirt roads, I mused. And a bunch of horses… and no electricity… outhouses… and ranches. Many, many ranches. Wait, Father D isn't that old. For Carmel to look like that, he would have had to be born in 1850…

I gasped as I felt a pang in my heart. 1850. My breathing went shallow, and I felt like crying. Don't ask me why. Your guess is as good as mine.

"Susannah! Why are you so late?" Father Dominic opened my car door for me.

"Thanks." I pulled my bag out of my car and slammed the door.

"Well?"

"Um… I don't know. Nothing bad. I guess I just… overslept." Father D frowned and started walking towards the Mission.

"Susannah, there are two things I should like to speak to you about." We walked into his office. Once I was comfortably seated in one of his brown leather chairs, he began.

"The first. Is something strange happened last night."

"What do you mean?" For some reason, last night was a complete blank to me.

"Susannah… did you and Paul… do something?"

"What type of something are we referring to?"

"Something that might have changed… er, history? Something isn't right Susannah. Don't you feel it?"

Something was out of order. But I didn't know what, and I was just too lazy to go and try to fix it. It couldn't be all that important anyway.

"I don't know Father D. I can't really remember last night."

He gave me a weird look. "Perhaps we will call in Mr. Slater."

For some reason I dreaded seeing or talking to my boyfriend. "Not now Father. What was the other thing you wanted to talk to me about?"

"Oh. Right." He smiled. "I'm very proud to say that the Mission has accepted a new student."

"Oh?" I asked, not really caring. Why was he telling me this?

But his excitement grew as he told me. "Yes. He is of Catholic Spanish background." Spanish…. Something about Spanish guys gave me a pleasant chill. Which is weird because the last time I checked, Paul was Caucasian. "He has won several academic awards."

"Sounds like a smart as… a dictionary! Smart as a dictionary!" Father D realized that I was about to slip some unholy words.

"Susannah." He warned. "There is no need-"

"To use language like that. Yeah, yeah I know. So when's the walking dictionary coming anyway?"

"Tomorrow. And I tell you only because I'd like you to show him around the school. Get him introduced to everyone…. And… Susannah," Father D's voice got lower. "He is a mediator."

"Really?" This kid had everything going for him… smarts, background, ability to talk to the dead… not that I considered that a blessing, but still.

"I think that Mr… eh, De Silva should prove himself a very useful asset."

De Silva. I had never heard the name, but it made me feel flushed. De Silva. It reminded me of… someone. Someone who would have dark flashing eyes, and washboard abs….

"Now, Susannah, I would like you to get to class. You have already missed homeroom." He sighed.

"Okay, see you Father D."

I walked out of his office and into the mission breezeway. It was chilly even though it was nearing the end of spring. (A/n I have no idea what time of year it was so live with it.)

"Suze." Paul came out of nowhere.

"Geez, are you trying to give me a heart attack?" I turned to face my boyfriend. He searched my face.

"Why are you so late?"

"I overslept…" Paul gave a slight smile. He wrapped his arms around me.

"Oh, Suze…" He leaned in to kiss me. As his lips touched mine, I felt like pulling away. But at the same time I felt myself melting into his kiss. I mean, Paul had a lot going for him. He had the looks, the baby blues, and the kissing technique… and of course he had me…

Paul pulled away. I reached for him.

"Don't stop." I muttered, moving my lips along his. I felt Paul smiled against me.

"Suze." He breathed. "I'm so happy we're together…"

I pulled away and smiled at him. "So am I." It wasn't often I saw Paul truly happy like this. His eyes light up and his whole face transformed.

"Come on," he said, "let's go to first period."

I followed him down the corridor.

"Susannah."

I jerked suddenly, in the middle of English class, freaking everyone out.

"Suze, are you okay?" Cee Cee whispered to me.

"Yeah…" I glanced around me, "I'm fine."

The voice was smooth and silky. And the way it had sounded… it gave me pleasant tingles up my spine to think about it.

I looked up and saw that Paul was giving me an odd look. I smiled at him.

"Suze-" He began.

"Mr. Slater!" The English teacher boomed out. It was common knowledge that Mr. Buck had it in for Paul. I tried to hold in my laughter.

"What is the meaning of this?" He yelled, throwing his chalk at the window, breaking it. Geez, the guy had some arm strength.

"I think," Paul said, " that it means you'll have to pay for that window."

The whole class burst out laughing. Mr. Buck fumed. "CLASS DISMISSED!" His face could not have been any redder.

"Nice one." I said to my boyfriend as we were walking out.

He gave me his trademark 'Paul' smile.

He followed me to my locker, where I needed to dispose of my English books.

"Suze-" He didn't continue.

"What?" I asked, shutting my locker and looking up at him.

"Suze…" His gorgeous blue eyes took on a strange sort of glow. "I just want you to know… that I love you."

(A/N This little section was taking from pages 212-213 from Haunted by Meg Cabot, so I don't get sued or anything )

""Susannah," He said. His dark eyes- each one containing a tine star of white where my bedroom reflected off them- bore into mine.

"Susannah I-""

I blinked, and the brown eyes were gone. Instead Paul was giving me a strange look.

"Suze?"

"Paul…" I looked into his tender eyes. So long I had waited to here him say that. I smiled.

"Paul, I love you too."

He drew me into a tight hug. "Suze, nothing can ever split us apart. Promise me that."

"Never." I said. The fear of losing him clutched my heart. "I promise."

PAUL'S POV

Dammit. He just won't go away will he? Father Dominic is so excited about how St. De Silva who's coming tomorrow. I mean geez. Shouldn't the guy be living the time of his life with good ole Maria?

Suze didn't remember him, obviously. I was the only one who remembered Rico because I had no attachments to him whatsoever.

It was great. Suze finally loved me as much as I loved her. And no reincarnated cowboy was going to change that.

"Suze-" She closed her locker door and looked at me expectantly. We had just come from class where I had totally owned the teacher.

"Suze…" I loved her. It was time she finally knew that. And this time there would be no Jesse to mess it up.

"I just want you to know… that I love you." Her gorgeous green eyes, which had been staring at mine, suddenly defocused, and she looked aeons away. Then she blinked and looked at me again.

"Suze?" What was going on? I had heard during last period… he called her name. She was freaked by it, but she didn't remember. There was no way she could. He was never a ghost dammit! The papers never said anything about this! Why is this happening?

"Paul…" Her eyes softened. She smiled. "Paul, I love you too." My heart melted. I hugged her to me tightly.

"Suze, nothing can ever split us apart. Promise me that." I wouldn't lose her again. Never.

"Never." She said, mirroring my thoughts. "I promise."