The Bodyguard
(Rated PG-13 for coarse language, sexual references and adult themes)
Summary: She was the successful, intelligent and influuencial Ministry official. He was the trust-funded, but un-employed, handsome playboy. But when Draco Malfoy is hired as Hermione Granger's bodyguard, it's amazing that two people so different (with the hatred of each other to prove it) could fit together so perfectly in the jigsaw puzzle of life.
Disclaimer: While I have no proper one, I'll give it a shot ... The characters Hermione Granger, Draco Malfoy and all other people, things, etc affiliated with the world of Harry Potter do not belong to me, but to J.K. Rowling. I am making no profits from this story. Any entertainment programs or movies mentioned do not belong to me. Do not sue me. I own nothing (except for Tammy Harding - she's mine).
THE BODYGUARD
Chapter 2 - Opposite Sides of the Wheel
Hermione was called into the office of the Minister of Magic himself, Arthur Weasley, later that day. Cornelius Fudge had been overthrown as Minister after Voldemort had been defeated a few years earlier. In different circumstances, Hermione would have been ecstatic that Mr Weasley would be getting the promotion and funding that he deserved. However, there weren't different circumstances (it was labelled the 'Ron Situation' in the private depths of her mind), and so Hermione dreaded ever having to see Mr Weasley. It was just too awkward around them.
Hermione had always privately blamed herself for Ron's departure. She was sure that if she and Ron had talked their problems out, then Ron would still have been living in the Burrow, and she would have celebrated crazily along with the rest of the Weasley clan when Arthur was promoted. But no, Ron was not here, and she had not celebrated crazily. And she had told herself to move on, and to forget the silly behaviour around Arthur, but she had told herself to move on so many times that she thought it would be suitable to move onto a different solution to her problems.
"Hello, Miss Granger," Mr Weasley's secretary greeted Hermione perkily. "The Minister is expecting you. Enter whenever you wish." As soon as the secretary had finished that last sentence, Hermione had a wild urge to run off as fast her shoes could have taken her. But that was stupid. They were both fully grown adults; they could settle this sanely. Hopefully.
Instead, Hermione took in an unsteady breath and then knocked on the door that was marked 'Minister of Magic: Arthur Weasley' in regal looking red letters.
"Come in." Mr Weasley's voice floated out. Hermione gripped the door knob and then entered the room.
"Good morning, Minister." Hermione said stiffly. Mr Weasley nodded, and then gestured for her to take a seat, which she did.
"You know that I've told you so many times to call me 'Arthur', Hermione." Mr Weasley said, sitting down in his own chair.
"I'm not comfortable with informalities when in presence of such authorities, Minister." Hermione replied, knowing that she was only saying that to piss Mr Weasley off.
"Alright, alright;" Mr Weasley replied. "Hermione, the real reason I called you into here is to talk about your status--"
'Oh shit.' Hermione thought to herself. 'He's going to talk about Ron and ask me if I know anything, and then we're going to get into a big fight and I'll lose my job. Or maybe he's going to ask me about my own opinions on why Ron left. Pfft ... I already knew that he left over me. Or, or ...'
"--of security." Mr Weasley finished. Hermione's pulse slowed down.
'Oh.'
"Oh?" she asked calmly - or as calmly as she could muster.
"Yes. You are, as you are now aware, the head of a very important headquarters, Hermione." Mr Weasley said. She wished that he would stop calling her by her first name; it was getting on her nerves. "And you've probably thought of your security once or twice previously." Hermione responded with a subtle blink of the eyes. Mr Weasley paused, waiting for her answer.
"Yes, Minister." Hermione replied.
"Well, I've decided to hire you a bodyguard. He will follow you anywhere, except for the bathroom, of course. This is for privacy measures, obviously, but he will also live with you, so there can be 24 hr surveillance on you." Mr Weasley explained. Hermione gulped.
'There's going to be an extra person in my house, living with me, and I didn't even know.' She thought to herself, biting her lip. 'Well, they have an element of surprise, I'll give them that.'
"Now, I've met this young man, and he even though when we first met he gave a less than welcoming response, I strongly doubt that he is the same person as before. It might even be counted as ironic that he will be working for a person in your current occupational position." Mr Weasley said. The Tammy part of Hermione's brain kicked in, and she wondered if the guy was hot. "Mr Malfoy, you may meet your new boss."
'SHIT!'
The door opened, and Draco Malfoy stepped into the room to meet the equally shocked and rounded eyes of Hermione Granger.
'NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO!!' Hermione was going to throw something against the wall ... maybe Mr Weasley would have been most appropriate.
One of Draco's jaw muscles tensed as he walked towards Hermione and extended his hand.
"What have I done to enter the Twilight Zone?" Hermione breathed to herself.
"Ahh, the strong, silent type." Mr Weasley said; a twinkle in his eye that slightly resembled Dumbledore's.
Almost too scared to move, Hermione got up off of her seat and then begrudgingly shook Draco's hand whilst looking him in the eye.
'Hm, they're a stormy blue-grey colour ... NO! What the hell are you thinking, Hermione? THIS IS DRACO MALFOY, THE GIANT ASS-HOLE THAT MADE YOU LIFE CRAP DURING SCHOOL!' Hermione was the first one to draw back from the handshake. She may have been too flabbergasted to speak, but she could definitely think efficiently.
"Right, now, the two of you can go back to Miss Granger's office. Mr Malfoy, you will use any means necessary to protect Miss Granger, as long as it is appropriate for the situation. I trust, though, that you already knew that ...?" Mr Weasley cut in. Draco tore his disapproving stare off of Hermione to nod swiftly to Mr Weasley.
"Yes, Minister." he said stiffly.
"Fantastic. Well, good day!" Mr Weasley started filing through some papers on his desk.
Hermione exited the room, stuttering. This couldn't be happening. Today was supposed to be a good day, but all of a sudden it went ... phht.
" 'Phht' indeed." Hermione muttered to herself. She shoved Draco against the wall. "Stay here." Surprisingly, Draco shut up as well - which was an added bonus - and Hermione went back into Mr Weasley's office.
"Minister!" Hermione said.
"Yes, Hermione?" Mr Weasley asked.
"Draco Malfoy!" Hermione said in shock and anger.
"If you intend on naming random people, I do advise that you do it when you're not in the presence of one of them ..."
"Don't play dumb with me, Arthur!" Hermione argued.
"Ahh, it seems that you've finally taken to calling me by the first name. Nice work." Mr Weasley gave a Dumbledore smile.
"Would you stop beating around the bush?!" Hermione yelled, not particularly caring that it was the Minister of Magic she was yelling at, and that Draco was outside and was probably pretty satisfied that Hermione was getting angry.
"I do assure you that there is no bush that I am apparently beating around." Mr Weasley said.
'This is infuriating! He's like some sort of idiot who speaks in riddles ...'
"Oh, c'mon! You hired DRACO FUCKING MALFOY as my BODYGUARD! The person who is going to LIVE WITH ME to PROTECT ME!" Hermione said, slamming both hands onto the table. Right now, it wasn't a fight concerning the boss and the worker. It was a fight between two people - one being infuriatingly calm and the other being infuriated.
"Hermione, you might be upset, but profanity is not needed." Mr Weasley said.
"This is payback, isn't it?" Hermione asked angrily. "You think that I made Ron leave, and so you're getting your revenge by hiring that ... that ... THING to be my bodyguard!"
"I have no idea what you're talking about." Mr Weasley said simply.
"Don't act stupid, Arthur! You know this is revenge. You know it, I know it. Hell, even the albino ferret knows it!" Hermione said, pointing to Mr Weasley, herself and the doorway respectively.
"This has gone quite far enough." Mr Weasley said, rising out of his seat. "I am the Minister of Magic, Miss Granger!"
"And I'm the President of the Auror Headquarters - what's your point?" Hermione shot back.
"Leave my office immediately and live with it - I have more important things to do than to argue with you." Mr Weasley said in controlled rage before sitting back down.
'Stupid git.' Hermione thought to herself as she stepped out of his office. Draco was still waiting for her outside.
"Had a bit of a tiff, did you?" Draco asked, smirking.
"Oh, shut up." Hermione snapped.
"Ooh, not in a good mood are we?" Draco winked at her and Hermione rolled her eyes.
"First of all, me, you and that git were never a 'we' in the first place." Hermione replied before leading the both of them to the elevator. "Secondly, I'm pissed off, Malfoy, so leave me alone."
"I assure you that the feeling is mutual." Draco said as Hermione poked the 'Up' button furiously.
"Wonderful. Then we can both have a mutual agreement that I'll fire you and get a new bodyguard." The elevator dinged and the door opened; Hermione stepping in first and facing the back wall.
"I'm sorry, little Miss Perpetually PMS 2004, but I'm not leaving this job!" Draco said as the door closed. There was no way that he would leave this job - his mother would kill him ... Or have the 'birds and the bees' talk with him - which was worse.
Hermione turned around, arms crossed. "What did you call me?"
"Whatever you think I did." Draco said smoothly.
'I haven't seen him for seven years, and he's still a prick.' Hermione thought to herself as she turned back to face the elevator wall.
"Look; why do you still want the job?" Hermione asked. Then a better question struck her. "Why do you want a job in the first place? You've got enough money to feed your ever-growing libido for the rest of your life. It's not as if you need any more."
Draco smirked at the libido comment - both of them knew that it was true. "Not that it would mean anything to you, but I decided that I needed a change of scenery." He knew that his mother would turn into a perfect, loving and maternal parent before he told Hermione that he had only taken the job so that his mother wouldn't have killed him.
"Yeah?" Hermione scoffed. "And what scenery would that be?"
"The clubbing one." Draco replied. "Doesn't really seem like you would know it, what with being in the same job for so long. I wouldn't think of you as the cleavage-over-cleverness type."
Hermione ignored the insult and instead felt jealous. She was the one who had been stuck in a job for the previous 5 years in the same place. She was the one who had always dreamed of doing nothing but partying for that long. She was the one who was the victim! And what was she doing? She was working with a man who had what she wanted ... Yet he wanted a change of lifestyle. He must of been crazy.
"You must be crazy." Hermione said. Draco laughed.
"I'm not the crazy one. I've decided to settle down ..." Draco looked Hermione up and down disdainfully. "No matter the situation I am settling for." Hermione rolled her eyes.
The elevator dinged and three people entered; each giving Hermione unspoken greetings. She returned them with a curt nod of the head, and even Draco knew that their situation wasn't to be discussed right now. Instead, they just looked at each other with equal contempt.
There was silence now as the steady hum of the elevator overpowered any other noise. It dinged and then the doors opened at Hermione (and now also Draco's) floor. Nodding to the other people in the elevator, Hermione stepped out with Draco in tow.
The entire office went silent when they saw Draco.
Women spilled their coffee. Men dropped their photocopies. Gary Tanner stood mouth agape. Harry looked repulsed.
"Hermione, if you duck, I can get a clear shot of him." Harry muttered to Hermione out of the corner of his mouth.
Hermione shook her head wearily instead and surveyed the scene. All of the aurors (even Gary Tanner, who seemed to have regained his composure) had their hands on their wands, ready to act. Only Tammy was the one who actually smiled when she saw Draco.
'I guess Mark is out of the window.' Hermione thought to herself as she saw Tammy winking at Draco, obviously not having a clue in the world who he was.
"If this is the best the Auror Headquarters can do, then I'm actually not surprised." Draco commented into the silence.
"Funny, isn't it then, that such headquarters could have captured your father and stuck him in Azkaban." Harry said in a whisper-like tone. Draco felt his blood pumping. He bit his tongue. No way was he going to let Pot-head see him lose his cool.
Oh, screw it.
"Shut up about my father, you stupid little piece of shit!" Draco shouted at him. "How would you know, anyway? It wasn't as if you ever had a father to feel asham--"
"Stupefy!" Harry yelled, pulling out his wand and stunning Draco.
All at once, the office returned to noise, and all the normal activity resumed. The women cleaned up their mess and the men picked up their dropped papers. Tammy got up immediately.
"Harry!" Hermione said, not bothering to bend down to check on Draco.
"Hermione!" Harry shot back.
"The sludge bucket is my new - and only - bodyguard." Hermione said. Harry could have fainted.
"Dr ... Dr ... Draco Malfoy? The bouncing slug himself?" Harry asked incredulously. "Excuse me, Hermione, but whoever employed him was delusional."
"I'm sure that Ron and his father would have loved to hear that." Hermione grumbled to Harry, who immediately shut up.
"Ooh, who's this character?" Tammy looked down onto the stunned form of Draco, overlooking the fact that Harry had said that his father had been sent to Azkaban by aurors. "He's cute."
"What happened to Mark?" Hermione asked wryly.
"Hrm?" Tammy asked, not daring to stop staring at Draco.
"You know ... the guy who does the best --"
"Oh, well, consider it over." Tammy said nonchalantly. "Besides, even when he's stunned ... This guy looks like he would know what he's doing."
"Tammy!" Harry interrupted. "Not now, and definitely not with THIS person. What are we going to do with him?" Hermione shrugged.
"He's my bodyguard." Hermione said, involuntarily flinching at the sound of those words. She frowned in a nondescript way. "Hmm ... Didn't put up much of a fight, did he?"
"I would have preferred that it stayed that way during school." Harry added, nudging Draco's side with his shoe. "Hey, that's fun!"
"What's his name?" Tammy asked, ignoring Harry, who was immensely enjoying himself as he nudged Draco's side.
"Draco Malfoy." Hermione spat with a great hatred. Tammy's eyes lit up.
"Malfoy?" she asked in disbelief. "Wasn't he captured by McCrow and then shoved into Azkaban?"
"No, that was just his father." Hermione said grimly. "This is the merely the son of the devil."
"I find that easy to believe." Harry said, crossing his arms as he stopped nudging Draco.
"Well, what DO we do to him?" Hermione asked. Tammy's eyes glinted.
"If you're up for a bit of excitement, all we need is some chocolate body paint and --"
"Tammy!" Hermione snapped. Tammy giggled.
"Ok, Ok, how about we just put him in your office?" Tammy suggested. "He's your pathetic bodyguard ... he should stick with you."
"Good idea." Harry agreed. "Even though he should be burnt at the stake instead."
"Why can't we just Enervate him?" Hermione asked, ignoring Harry. He, however, intervened on this one.
"Oh, come on, Hermes!" he said. "How many times will you ever get Draco Malfoy stunned in front of you? Let's just put him in your office and see what happens from there."
Hermione sighed and then picked up one of his legs; Harry did have a point.
"Help me carry him." Hermione said as she started tugging.
"Mobilicorpus!" Harry said, and Draco lifted off of the ground, sending Hermione sprawling backwards with an ungraceful "AWP!"
"Harry, you're fired." Hermione mumbled, reminding herself of Donald Trump.
"I am sorry, oh mighty leader of the Auror Headquarters." Harry said in a flat tone.
"Shut up." Hermione shot back, getting back up and dusting down her skirt.
Once Draco was safely in Hermione's office, Hermione, Tammy and Harry sat down and stared at Draco, in-advertedly studying him.
"He's definitely the same crackpot we saw last time." Harry concluded grimly.
"Acts like it too." Hermione agreed ruefully.
"Still a jerk-ass?" Harry asked, not even looking at Hermione.
"Did a good job proving it." Hermione replied, looking only at Draco as well.
"Thought so." Harry replied.
"I think that he's hot." Tammy said casually.
"Excuse me?" both Harry and Hermione turned to stare at Tammy, who was resting her head in the palm of her head whilst her elbow jutted into her leg.
"I think that he's hot." Tammy repeated.
"Oh, ew!" Harry turned an odd shade of green. "This is Malfoy, we're talking about! All the money that he spent on hair gel could have gone to feed a third world country!" Tammy frowned slightly and turned her head a different angle so that she could see Draco better - something both Harry and Hermione thought was beyond comprehension.
"He doesn't seem to use it anymore." Tammy commented. Hermione gave Draco a quick glance and realised that Tammy was right. Draco's hair was now more of a mess ... but not quite a mess.
'It's like an organised mess.' Hermione thought to herself. 'Like organised flakes of a blonde me--'
"I can't believe that you can look at him in that way!" Hermione objected loudly, as if the noise level would effectively block out her thoughts.
"Fine, fine." Tammy held her hands up in defeat. Harry and Hermione exchanged glad glances. "I just reckon that he's aesthetically pleasing." Tammy said slyly. The remaining two groaned.
"You can't even see his face properly." Harry pointed out.
"Oh, don't worry ... Any other part of his anatomy will do." Tammy winked before giving herself a Draco smirk.
This was probably the best time for Draco to wake up - and he did. The blonde stretched out ever so subtly as he slowly opened his eyes, raising his eyebrow in an attempt to keep them opened. As his vision came slowly to him, Draco resumed his usual smug face. He looked around the office to find Hermione, Harry and a girl who he didn't know the name of. She was pretty hot, though, and that was only what counted according to Draco.
"Why, Granger! I've never had a foursome before ..." Draco said, lounging lazily in his chair. "All that's missing is the bed and the handcuffs. Then again, I've done it in more interesting locations than a bed ..."
"If you know what's good for you, you'll take that perverted little fantasy and shove it up your ass." Hermione said derogatorily.
"By all means, except it won't be MY ass that I'll put it IN ..." Draco winked at Hermione and Harry whipped out his wand.
"Listen, Dracula, how about you keep on talking and then I'll just blast your butt out of this department?" Harry asked.
"Ahh, jealous are we, Potter?" Draco asked, ignoring Hermione and going for Harry. He looked Harry up and down disdainfully, a pug-like look crossing his handsome face. "You haven't changed one bit. Still always trying to be the hero, I can see."
"At least trying to be the hero is better than achieving being the pompous git." Harry returned. Draco held his hand up to his heart, looking like he had been hurt inside and out.
"I'm mortally wounded, Potter!" Draco said sarcastically.
"If only." Hermione muttered to nobody in particular. She caught Tammy still drooling over Draco, and immediately sent her a 'cut it out!' look. Draco saw this, however, and sauntered over to Tammy arrogantly.
"Hello, there." Draco said; his voice practically having its own smirk. "I'm Draco."
"Tammy." Tammy said, getting up and giving him a flirtatious smile.
"Well, Miss Tammy, it's nice to meet you." Draco said, slowly lifting up Tammy's hand before kissing it. He leant in to her ear and started whispering. "I'm sure that we'll get to know each other better."
"Me two." Tammy replied.
In the meantime, Harry and Hermione were looking off into the distance, discussing random topics.
"The weather's been nice lately." Hermione commented airily as she looked out of her spacious windows.
"Quite." Harry agreed, also looking out of the windows.
"Hmm, it looks like my pot plant needs some watering." Hermione said as she gestured to the dying green mess in the corner.
"I know a spell for it." Harry offered. He aimed his wand at the plant. "Evarleafus!" A small green jet flew out of his wand and hit the plant, which started flourishing before their eyes. It was like growth had been videotaped, re-winded and then fast forwarded.
"Thanks." Hermione said, looking past the figure of Draco (who was still flirting shamelessly with Tammy) to the pot plant. "It looks a lot healthier."
"You're welcome." Harry replied, looking past the figure Tammy (who was still flirting shamelessly with Draco) to the pot plant. "Feel free to use that spell whenever you want."
"I'll keep that in mind." Hermione said. She opened her mouth again to talk when there was a knock at the door.
"Come in!" Harry and Hermione said in unison, both with probably too much enthusiasm.
The door swung open and Kiki Summers - the lunch lady - came in with a pad of paper and a pen.
"Hi, Miss Granger." Kiki smiled, nodding to everyone else, particularly Draco. "What would you like for lunch today?"
Being the President of the Auror Headquarters had its advantages - for one thing, Hermione got her own free waitress to bring her free food. Everyday, Kiki would come in and ask Hermione what she wanted for lunch. Today was obviously no exception.
"I think I'll go out for lunch, Kiki." Hermione replied and Kiki nodded, before exiting the room. Hermione got up and headed for the door, Draco and Tammy still talking to each other. Harry hurried over to her.
"What do you think you're doing?" he asked her. "Everywhere you go you have to have him to guard you. Do you really want Malfoy going out and making a scene?" Hermione shrugged.
"It's not gonna kill me, Harry. Besides, the real reason why I'm going out to lunch is because of this:--" Hermione grabbed her coat and clicked her fingers as she winked to Harry. "-- come, Draco!"
With that, she swept out of the room, an angry Draco by her side.
That night at work, Draco sat himself in a squishy blue armchair that was kept as far away from Hermione as possible. After lunch (which had gone without anything bad happening), all Draco had done was flirt with that Tammy girl for quite a while before Hermione called him in and told him that he was getting paid to guard her, and he wasn't going to be doing that if he was 'visually shagging Tammy all the time.' Draco had scoffed, of course, and had gone to the squishy blue chair. He remained there for ages, on the verge of sleep as Hermione plowed through pile after pile of paperwork.
Finally, Hermione stretched and put on her shoes. She got up closed the filing cabinet.
"Are we going?" Draco asked in a bored tone. It was his first day of work and he was already bored to tears.
"Yes, actually." Hermione replied as she pulled on her coat. Draco instantly stood up and went straight to the door as Hermione turned off the lights in her office.
They stepped out and Hermione locked the door with an un-alohomora-able spell. Then Hermione checked that everything was locked and secure with Draco in tow. When everything seemed to be in order, Hermione conjured up a fireplace. Draco took a pinch of the Floo Powder on the side and threw it into the fire, which turned emerald grin. He gave a smug look as he saw the thriving Slytherin coloured flames.
"Ok, this fireplace is going to selfdestruct in 30 seconds, so we'll make it quick. The floo address for my flat is Granger, Harbour St, London. I'm going to apparate, so I'll meet you there." Hermione explained. As soon as Draco nodded, she disappeared with a POP and a yawn.
"Granger, Harbour St, London." Draco said and stepped in. Then he was on his way to Hermione Granger's house.
Before, he was in the deserted Auror Headquarters in the Ministry of Magic. Now, he was in a timber floored, cream walled house. There were comfortable looking couches and chairs dotted around neatly, and there was a coffee table that held a bowl full of fruit. The halogen lamps had been turned on, and from his view of the fireplace, Draco could see a hint of a bedroom with a nicely made up bed. There was the hum of a fridge and the sound of running water from a tap.
Getting up from his spot, Draco turned to get a better look at the place. It was a modest flat without too many fancy trimmings, but it had a nice warm and comfy feel to it; so unlike the cold and uninviting Malfoy Manor. The couches were almost asking to be sat on, and there were pillows laid on them. Frowning, Draco noticed that his things had been placed onto one of them. He had expected a bed or something that was at least made for sleeping; instead, he had gotten a couch.
'Oh well, it IS Granger, after all.' Draco thought to himself. He looked around. 'Speaking of which, where is the dirty mudblood?'
He quickly found the answer to his question in the kitchen. Hermione was in there chopping vegetables hopelessly. She had made some strong black coffee in a large mug and occasionally took long sips from it when her chopping went more haywire than usual. She drank it like an alcoholic would drink strong tasting and burning tequila.
Draco leaned against the doorway of the kitchen, watching Hermione with an entertained expression. She had mastered every subject that she had taken at school perfectly. She topped every subject, every year. She had been prefect and Head Girl. She had been valedictorian for Hogwarts. She had gotten a job at the Ministry of Magic and had become the President of the Auror Headquarters in the span of a few years. So it amused Draco greatly that Hermione failed at something so simple as making vegetable soup.
"Having a few culinary troubles, Granger?" Draco asked. He saw Hermione set down the knife (which was a good sign) and pack the vegetables away into a plate that was eventually covered with plastic.
"So what? I can't cook to save my life." Hermione said, draining the mug of coffee. "At least I'm not you." She set the mug into the sink and filled it with water.
"Hey, I can cook." Draco held up his hands.
"And that would be your one and only talent." Hermione said, as if it were a statement, not a question.
"Oh, I've got many other talents." Draco said, smirking. He moved towards Hermione, who rolled her eyes. "It's just that they're not in the kitchen."
"Hey, that's great!" Hermione said sarcastically. "Tell somebody who cares."
"I'm sure that you might soon." Draco winked, moving even closer.
"I'm sure that I never will." Hermione replied.
"Really, now?" Draco asked, now only inches away from her face. His eyes darted around her face, going from her eyes down to her lips. "Are you certain about that?" He moved closer, semi-closing his eyes.
Suddenly, the situation hit Hermione like a ton of Pensieves at once. Draco Malfoy was leaning into her face slowly with his eyes closing. He was way too close, and there was probably no chance of escape if she wanted to dart away. This was bad. REALLY bad.
"I know Tae Kwon Doe." Hermione blurted out. She really didn't know Tae Kwon Doe (she only knew what it was because she had read about it when she was doing Muggle Studies during school) and if asked to perform it, she had better chance of cooking a full course, five star a dinner for royalty.
Draco stopped moving, which was at least something. He frowned. "What's that?"
"It means that I can knee you where it REALLY hurts and not even feel any remorse." Hermione replied. Draco seemed non-pulsed, but he did back off.
"Your loss." He shrugged.
"I'll take my chances." Hermione said simply, pushing Draco out of the way in order to get to the phone. "Do you like pizza?"
"No." Draco replied. He found that the oil and the sauce could easily stain his shirts and could prove to be quite messy. He didn't like the hands-on approach to eating it either; he was born an aristocrat (if not a slightly snobby one), and he'd act like an aristocrat till his dying day.
"Great!" Hermione punched in the number of the local magical pizza place and ordered a large supreme pizza. Draco scowled at her.
"One pizza isn't going to be enough." he said, admitting to defeat.
"Who said that you were going to have some?" Hermione asked.
"What?" Draco frowned.
"Well, you said that you could cook." Hermione shrugged. "So go ahead, use the kitchen and make your own dinner. Just clean everything and put it back where it came from once you're finished." Hermione plucked a tea towel from its resting spot and shoved it against Draco's chest.
"B-b-bu--" Draco protested.
"Have fun!" Hermione's voice echoed from the living room, where she had switched on the T.V. to find that newly married celebrity muggle couple. It was that blonde, ditzy pop singer and her former boy band, pretty-boy husband.
Draco slinked around angrily in the kitchen, throwing the tea towel down onto the stove. He went into the living room to find Hermione sitting cross-legged in front of the TV. This was not funny. It must have been a sick prank or something to have set him up with Granger, of all people. She thought that he was an inconvenience, but did she ever consider herself as one? Obviously not.
"I'm not cooking, Granger." Draco said drawled, crossing his arms in a form of defense.
"Great. You can go and starve whilst I go and get another bodyguard." Hermione replied, still watching the television.
"I'm serious." Draco persisted.
"So am I." Hermione said.
"Granger!" Draco protested. This was stupid!
"Look, what do you want from me?" Hermione yelled, immediately drowning out the TV. She stood up and narrowed her eyes. "It's not as if we're going to have an animated conversation or something! I don't even know why want a job."
"I want food." Draco responded. Hermione chose to ignore him.
"We're at the opposite ends of the colour wheel." she said. "It's like ... I'm blue and you're orange!"
"I don't like orange." Draco said.
"Fine! You're blue and I'm orange!" Hermione rolled her eyes. "If there's one thing about them put together, it's the fact that they DON'T MIX."
"On second thoughts, I don't like blue either. But orange is the better one out of both of them." Draco decided.
"That's not the point, Malfoy!" Hermione interrupted. "The point is that we're completely different! And it doesn't look like you'll need a job anytime soon. So why don't you just fucking leave?"
Draco's eyes grew wide with shock as he gasped. "You said the 'fff' word!" He obviously had no objections to swearing (he sworn like crazy whenever he drank one of Drinky's horribly-tasting-but-effective-hangover drinks), but he had only done it to anger Hermione further.
And anger her he did. "Oh fucking hell, Draco!" Hermione shouted. "Why don't you just conjure yourself some food? Or you too much of a lazy ass to do so?"
"Oh. Nice work, Hermies." Draco smiled, as he conjured up his own salad, drink and chicken schnitzel.
Draco could have sworn that he saw Hermione's eye twitching. "Don't call me that."
"I AM sorry, Hermy-nins." Draco drawled; expecting devil horns to grow out of his silky hair any moment.
"You're pushing it, Malfoy." Hermione said, returning to the TV. The show about the blonde singer and her pretty-boy husband had ended, and instead a show about a male celebrity playing tricks on his other famous friends had come on.
"What would I be pushing, Granger?" Draco smirked. "Being more specific will do you wonders."
The doorbell rang and Hermione got up, glaring at Draco. She answered the door to find the pizza boy.
"That will be 2 Galleons and 12 sickles." the pizza boy said, holding up his hand. Hermione handed him the money and thanked him. (A/N: I don't know how much pizza costs over there, but here it usually costs around $11 if you get it delivered)
She went to the kitchen, collected a plate, poured herself a drink and then continued watching the show, ignoring Draco.
When dinner was finished and the dishes were done, Hermione took a shower and changed into her nightgown. She went into her room and sat down on her bed. Draco had changed, but not showered - Hermione wouldn't let him 'pollute' her bathroom. He entered Hermione's bedroom.
"Where's my bed?" he asked as Hermione started dragging a brush through her hair. He had hoped that when he had seen his stuff on the couch, it was only there because it had just been there randomly.
"Non-existent." Hermione replied. "You're sleeping on the couch."
"I'm your bodyguard, though. I should be sleeping somewhere near you that's comfortable so that if duty calls - goodness forbid if it does - then I'll be able to spring to your defense comfortably." Draco said in a calm voice. "I suggest a bed in this room. Or even THE bed in this room ... we could get well acquainted under the same covers." Draco raised an eyebrow suggestively. Hermione looked disgusted - which suited Draco fine.
"On the couch, Malfoy." Hermione said. "The couch is as close as you're going to get."
"Fine; but don't blame me if somebody attacks you and I'm not springing up comfortably." Draco replied, setting himself down onto the couch. Hermione waved her wand and her bedroom door closed.
"Stupid git." she muttered as she extinguished her light.
Draco pulled the covers up to his chest and let out a sigh. He had gone from his warm, squishy king size bed in the Malfoy Manor to a couch in a mudblood apartment in one day. He groaned and then turned over.
"Stupid cow." he muttered as he fell asleep.
.·:':·..·:':·..·:':·..·:':·..·:':·.
':·..·:':·..·:':·..·:':·..·:':·..·:
A/N: Well there you have it - the second chapter to the story! REVIEW, everybody, REVIEW! I hope that you all liked the chapter ... the third one might come a little later, as school starts yet again and I will most probably get loaded with homework.
Here are a few thank you's and (pulls out packets of chocolate and trays of cupcakes) imaginary chocolates and cupcakes to all who reviewed for the last chapter! So, if you read your name here, you can claim your imaginary chocolate and cupcake:
ChristiLynn, thehopeconspiracy, Jexi, IceCrystal, keys3303, SlytherinSweetie, Sarah, alison, XxPaDfOoTiExX, Cinderbrat, Paradise-Unknown, XXXpinkkitty5467, Caboodle, Pure Sunshine. and caela. You all get imaginary chocolate and cupcakes – hurrah!
For this chapter, I will be rewarding people with imaginary strawberries and whipped cream. :)
Your devoted fanfiction writer,
--Look at moiye, ploise!--