(A/N): Hello, and I have decided to continue this fic, even though no one has reviewed it, in the vain hope that a new chapter will actually draw readers. I know, I know…that's kind of pathetic, and if Thunderstorm101 has this much time on her hands, she should be working on Baby Sitters of Doom or Peace Never Lasts, but I've got this backlogged in my notebook, and I want to get it up.

Please, please, I am begging you, REVIEW this!

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Disclaimer:

The only thing I own

Is the story line itself

The characters…

…They are not mine.

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Chapter Three

Can't we Just Camp?

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Ryoh looked around at the dingy room in the inn. It smelled of over boiled cabbage and broccoli and was painted a sickly brown with sickly yellow trim. Both beds smelled like sour milk. All in all, he would have preferred camping.

Jonouchi, however, was sprawled out on one of the rank beds. No, correction, Jonouchi's bed had a hint of stale urine. His, however, smelled as though someone had taken to stashing rotten eggs under the mattress.

Foul.

He stared at his "noble" companion.

His "noble" companion stared back.

"Don't sweat it, Ryoh, I've stayed in worse."

'Oh, joy,' Ryoh thought to himself. 'I think I would have preferred to travel by myself now…I'd have a better chance of surviving…'

"Ya know…I heard there's dis fortuneteller here in Greensdale. I was thinking' she could help us found year bud, ya know? If it weren't for her, we would have stayed in Plaugesivlle. Much nicer place, everything's healthy."

Ryoh stared at his companion before screwing up his courage and taking a seat on the revolting mattress. 'It's a little hard to see how this could be worse,' he thought, 'the room's disgusting, my companion thinks ten-o-clock is early, and I'm missing half my soul. This is going to be a long quest.'

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Jonouchi looked around and grinned. This was really his favorite recurring dream. The one where he had a mountain of food to eat.

"Oh yeah! Time to dig in!" he shouted, then he jumped into a pile of succulent desserts. There were rich, chocolate cakes, creamy cookies, every kind of fruit tart you can imagine, and entire foothill of pocky!

This could obviously go on forever, but Jonouchi woke in the middle of the night with an odd taste in his mouth. It appeared that he'd been eating his pillow in his sleep. It also appeared that said pillow was the source of the smell of old urine.

Choking and gagging, Jonouchi looked around, trying to see what had woken him. It couldn't have been the pillow…after all, he'd once eaten rotten eggs in his sleep without waking.

There! There was a tree branch tapping on the shutters. It sounded kind of like a ghost. Creepy.

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Bakura looked down at his stew. Aside from the grasshoppers, there were unidentifiable mushrooms. If these made him hallucinate, he'd have to start looking for a new companion.

"Ah…" he began uncertainly, "Honda, has your Travel Stew ever killed anyone?"

"Nah, Jonouchi used to pretend it was killing' him, but he really is a joker."

"Good to know. That's—" Bakura broke off as a bird landed on his bowl. The bird cocked its head to one side, then fished a grasshopper out of the bowl. It tossed its head back, and promptly spat the insect back into the bowl.

Bakura grinned at the bird, fished out the bug, and popped it into his mouth, chewing slowly. It tasted bitter, a bit like tin, and had a definite tang to it that can only be descried as "yellow green". However, he swallowed, and his grin only broadened as the bird fell over backward and Honda blanched.

"What?" asked Bakura innocently, doing his very best Ryoh imitation, "I'm only eating the stew you made…"

"I've never seen some one do that, Bakura. Does it have anything to do with your lack of conscience?"

"No," Bakura's grin only broadened. His companion had no idea… "This is actually my sense of humor. If Ryoh was here…" he broke off, holding back tears. "If Ryoh was here, he'd be laughing so hard he couldn't stand. As it is, all I can feel is a cold emptiness where he should be but isn't."

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Honda swallowed hard. As gross as that was…he supposed it was funny. Sad, too. It was hard to feel anything but pity for his torn companion.

"Well," he began, "I suppose if you're already eating, then I should start."

"Watch out for the grasshoppers…" Bakura murmured, grinning evilly.

"Wh—oh! Ugh! Nasty! Blech! How could you pretend to enjoy that! Aaaugh!"

"So you'd take a bit of one," Bakura stated simply, grinning. "Good night."

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A wrinkled old hag cackled to herself as she brewed a viscous spell. Yes…Malaura would be pleased…

Coplain had a plan to carry out her mistress's wishes.

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(A/N) Ordinarily I would put review responses here, but as no one deemed my earlier chapters worthy of being reviewed, I can't do that. Shame, really.

Please, review. It's only common courtesy, and it makes me feel much better! Just click on the friendly purple button and tell me what you think!