My inspiration as returned! And none of you have any idea what I mean by this! Mwhaha! AMAZING! HA! I STOLE YOUR WORD!
Before you say a word, you've probably noticed this is chapter 9. Where is chapter 8? There isn't one. See, my friend Nick (Who refers to himself as Dr. Nick) had noticed my Yuna-itis had transcended into Lenne-itis. One main reason was I remembered I don't really care about Tidus at all. Shuyin however...hmm hmm hmm chuckle. Apparently part of my brain has become permanently trapped in Spira or something. Dr. Nick's 'prescription' was to remove all things associated with Spira from my life for 2 weeks as of the time I posted chapter 8 of my story. Well, do you know how much effort that would be!? I'd have to change my computer background, take down half my posters, change my AIM theme and icon, take that picture out of my locker and hide my costumes! It can not be done!
Disclaimer: Well, I emailed Square Enix about sharing FFX with me. They said no. But I'm just gonna say I own Jarrett even though he'll probably have a fit when he reads that comment...
Chapter 9: Mistakes
We spent the rest of the night in Macalania. What a bizarre week this has been I thought to myself. I had become a guardian for a summoner who tries to kill me, Shea had come into the picture, but no Jarrett. I had accidentally hit Donna in the head with a machete while clearing a path through the woods. You may wonder 'Why would you hit Donna in the head with a machete?', but instead ask yourself 'Why was Donna in the way of my machete?'. I had also dyed Shea's hair black while she slept. Why did I dye Shea's hair black? Why was Shea's hair in my dye? Wow. The only way this could get weirder would be for Lulu to start smoking and Auron to wear a pink dress.
Today was the third day of the tenth month in the Spiran calendar: Uldupan; the equivalent to Earth's October. You'd think they'd realize that was Al Bhed. I awoke very early the next morning. The sun wasn't even up yet. I sat up and quickly jogged down to the pond near us. The only one awake was Kimahri, who was walking back from the lake. He seemed more vibrantly purple than normal. I ignored it and got to the water. I randomly swam around until I noticed something on my arm. 28:06:42:12. I knew what it was and screamed. Rikku came running.
"Fryd? Fryd?" She said.
"Look!" I yelled, holding out my arm.
"Wryd'c dra pek taym?"(What's the big deal?) She asked.
I ran out of the water, grabbed her arm, ran to Shea's bag and pulled out her DVD player. Shea was missing for some reason, but I was a little preoccupied.
"Did Shea ever show you the movie Donnie Darko?"
"No..."
I popped it in and showed the scene to her. She gasped.
"Promise not to tell Yuna. I know she's seen this movie" I begged of her.
"Sure, Pretz. I don't think she'll care though. I mean. She hates you"
"Call me crazy, Rikku, but I don't think that's totally true"
"Oui'na jnyxo" (You're crazy) She said.
We both laughed. Shea walked up and hit me for using her DVD player. I showed her my arm.
"Oui eteud. I drew that because you dyed my hair black while I was sleeping"
"You speak Al Bhed!?"
Yes, that was my main concern.
When
it was time to get up the next morning, I couldn't even get out of
my sleeping bag. Too cold. Kimahri pulled my sleeping bag around
across the icy floors until I fell out of it, sliding a few feet in a
fetal position. So after that traumatic experience, we left the
Macalania Woods, to a big old frozen lake: Lake Macalania. Are we at
the north pole of Spira or something? Where's the big, fat and
strange dude with candy. Strangers have the best candy. Some dude was
tending to a chocobo. Pass the ketchup! Kimahri never made breakfast.
"Hi there. Would you look at this? They always leave me
behind" He just automatically started talking. We all stared at
him wondering who the Hell he was for about 10 minutes.
The
flock walked some more. Now before me was a vast frozen lake. I
could've had only one thing on mind. BAMBI TIME! I jumped out onto
the ice, pulling Shea with me, and slipped and started skidding
around, eventually slamming into a rock. Then that guado guy from
before came up to the group. Tidus started flippin' out about him
not being on the list, but Kimahri held him back.
"Lady Yuna, we've been expecting you. We were surprised you decided to come so soon. Pleasantly surprised, of course. Lord Seymour sends his apologies for having left without notice"
Ok,
this dude sounded way too scripted and suspicious to be human......
Oh, wait. He's a guado. Never mind. They're all weird like
that.
"It's quite all right. I have one question, if I
may, sir" Yuna said in that fake innocent voice.
"My
lady?" The scary Medusa wannabe asked.
"I want to
keep journeying, even if I marry. Do you think that Maester Seymour
would let me?"
I
could be found in the background screaming "NNNOOO! Don't do it
Yuna! Seymour's a jackass!" and trying to fight off Kimahri's
grip.
"But of course, my lady. Lord Seymour wishes
nothing else, I'm sure" Tromell assured her.
Yuna
turned, faced the group, and nodded.
"Goodbye" She
said.
She walked up to Tromell.
"Well... We must
follow Guado tradition. I'll have to ask you to wait here a little
while longer. I'll send someone to escort you" Tromell stopped
her.
Wow, that's a stupid tradition to be married into. Why
does blueberry boy want to talk to Yuna alone so badly, anyway? I
thought. Is he like, planning world conquest or something? A
little skit-like thought popped into my head. Seymour had a very high
pitched voice.
"Lady Yuna, it would be a great honor if you took my hand in marriage. And we could crush Spira, like a grape. Did I say crush?! I meant to say unite in peace, and harmony, and bloodshed. Did I say bloodshed?! I meant to say-"
My
train of thought tragically lost in a freak dental accident. Tromell
walked away. Yuna began to walk, but turned around.
"I..."
"We're all with you. Do as you will" Auron said.
I
wish people wouldn't speak for me. Even though it would get me in
less trouble, it's annoying.
"Thank you" Yuna said
softly.
Auron turned his head to Tidus.
"Sorry"
Tidus went "Hmm?"
"That
was your line. I misread my script. Sorry"
Tidus ran
forward, remembering what he should have done before Auron stole his
line.
"Yuna!"
He whistled. Hmm, I didn't
know Yuna worked for a strip club now... She turned around.
"Yessir!"
Tromell and Yuna walked off.
Something else was getting the pack's (Me, Rikku and now Shea, just
cause she's crazy) attention.
"Oh, no!" We all
screamed in unison like you would see on Sailor Moon.
Wakka choked on the hockey puck he was trying to eat.
"Foul!
Oh, I mean Al Bhed!" he screamed.
Several Al Bhed on what
appeared to be jumbo-sized skidoo's encircled Yuna and Tromell. The
group jumped off the path to reach them, except Tidus who, for some
reason, ran around the long way.
"Stand back" Auron
Barked.
"Thank you!" Tromell said in his weird guado
voice.
Tromell and Yuna began to walk away. She jerked her hand from his grasp and rejoined the group. Wait... They were holding hands!? What the fuck?!
"Lady Yuna!"The group was completely surrounded by Al Bhed, who appeared ready to fight. All of a sudden, they all ran away. Oh yeah! Fear my majesty!
"Rikku!"
A dude with a Mohawk and too many tattoos and saggy overalls was standing on top of a hill of ice.
"Tuh'd ehdanvana un oui kad drec!" ("Don't interfere or you get this!") The farmer trying to imitate Good Charlotte yelled out.
Beside him, a large machina cannon moved up the hill.
"Ouin bnaleuic magic yht aeons yna caymat!" ("Your precious magic and aeons are sealed!")
He laughed. "Ok, this doesn't really matter. I don't use magic" I thought. Then I remembered the thousands of time Lulu had to bring me back to life and stuff........ "USING MAGIC! OH CRAP!"
"Oh, no!" Rikku cried, being over dramatic.
"Translation?" Tidus demanded, facing the wrong person, accidentally asking Shea.
"He's gonna use an anti-magic field on us!" Rikku yelled at Auron.
"Kad dras!" ("Get them!") Mohawk man yelled, facing the other way, before slipping and falling down the backside of the hill.
The cannon dropped down. Ok, to put this very simply: I got my ass kicked and handed to me on a platter.
"My lady!" Tromell said running up to Shea, who just pointed to Yuna.
Tromell and Yuna walked away. The Mohawk guy had crawled back up the hill.
"Rikku! E femm damm Vydran!" ("I will tell Father!") He whined.
"E ys dra guardian uv Yuna, oui caa? Yuna ec cyva! Fa femm kiynt ran! Cra ec cyva!" ("I am the guardian of Yuna, you see? Yuna is safe! We will guard her! She is safe!") Rikku yelled back at Wakka.
"Oui tu drec ymuha, cecdan!" ("You do this alone, sister!") He yelled sliding back down the hill. "Oui ryjah'd caah dra mycd uv sa Ehcbaldun Kytkad!" ("You haven't seen the last of me Inspector Gadget!")
Rikku
giggled. Ok, what else is new?
"I told him I was a
guardian. Well, guess I had to, really"
Wakka looked at everyone.
"Because we're Al Bhed. And that...was my brother" Rikku started at Tidus.
"You knew? Why didn't you tell me?" He yelled at Kimahri, who picked him up and put him down facing Lulu.
"We knew you'd be upset" She said calmly."This is great. I can't believe I've been traveling with an Al Bhed! A heathen!"
He sounded like Hillary Faye from that movie Saved.
"You're
wrong! We have nothing against Yevon" I sighed.
"But
you Al Bhed use the forbidden machina! You know what that means? Sin
was born because people used machina!" He wailed at Lulu.
"You
got proof? Show me proof!" Rikku defended.
"It's in
Yevon's teachings! Not that you'd know!" He sneered at a nearby
rock.
"That's not good enough! Yevon says this, Yevon
says that. Can't you think for yourself?" Rikku made an
excellent point, even though she was yelling at Shea.
"Well,
then you tell me! Where did Sin come from, huh?" Wakka poked me.
"I...I don't know!" Rikku continued to yell at poor
Shea.
"Hmph. You bad mouth Yevon, and that's all you can
come up with?" He started to nag at a nearby icicle
"But...
that doesn't mean you should do whatever they say without thinking!
Nothing will ever change that way!" I cut in, actually yelling
at the right person.
"Nothing has to change!" Wakka
twirled around, steaming at me all demonic like.
It was very scary.
"You want Sin to keep coming back? There might be a way to stop it, you know!" I defended."Oh
No! I just ended a sentence with you know! I'm turning into Rikku!"
I screamed at myself.
"Sin will be gone once we atone for
our past mistakes!" Wakka started to yell at a passing person.
"Dude, I'm just the plumber..." He said, ignoring Wakka.
"When? How?" Rikku finally started to help me."If we keep faith in Yevon's teachings it will be gone one day!" Wakka said oh so stubbornly.
"Why do I even bother?" I muttered.
"Rikku! Will this move?" Auron asked.
Finally,
a change of subject. He was standing beside one of the big skidoos
the Al Bhed left behind. She ran towards it and began fixing
it.
"We're not using that, are we? Wait... Sir Auron
isn't Al Bhed too, is he?" Wakka accused.
"Come on,
Wakka..." Tidus tried to calm him down.
"What!?"
"I mean, getting angry just 'cause you found out Pretz
and Rikku are Al Bhed... You guys got along fine till now, didn't
you?"
"That's different. I mean... Any one of you
could be an Al Bhed. A heathen! Auron, or Tidus, or Kimahri, or Lu,
or Shea, or even you" He blabbed on and on pointed at
nothing for that last one.
"Well, I don't claim to know
that much about Spira. And I probably know even less about the Al
Bhed, but... I know at least Rikku's a good person. She's just
Rikku!" Shea tried to convince him.
"Shut up! Lies!
All filthy lies!" He screamed, shoving her, "Lu?"
"Just
think of this as an opportunity to learn more about the Al Bhed"
She said calmly.
"Ha!"
Wakka walked away and
Tidus started to follow.
"Let him go. Give him time to
think" Auron stopped him.
"Think on what? His mind's already made up. I was following him to go beat some sense into him" Tidus explained, "And... Um, Auron?"
"What is it?"
"I've gotta go to the bathroom"
"Fine, but do it over there. Away from Wakka"
Tidus
yayed and skipped off to take a leak.
"We're sorry"
Rikku and I said at the same time.
"You've done nothing
to apologize for" Lulu reassured us. She's so much like a big
sister.
"All right! Let's Teh'go!" Tidus ran back
and yelled in a Mario voice.
"You sure you know how to
drive this?" Rikku asked.
Kimahri flipped one over that
had previously been upside down. He sat on it, and drove away. Oh,
THANKS Kimahri. Now we all have to be shoved onto the other two. Was
there two... or one. Hmm. This could be tricky.
"Better
than Kimahri does!" I laughed.
I plopped on one, with
Lulu behind me, and drove away. Only after I started driving
it did it come to mind "Oh, shit... I never got my drivers
permit..."
"I hope that you're not too mad at
Wakka" Lulu said plainly.
"Hey, not at all. People
accuse me of being evil every day"
"Thank you"
"Um,
you're welcome I guess"
I continued trying to drive,
almost running us off the cliff several thousand times.
"Say,
what do you think of Rikku?" I asked.
"Me?
She's...fun to be with"
"Well, I can tell she's not a bad person"
"Yeah. You know what the problem is? She's just another Al Bhed to Wakka. Wakka's head is as hard as a rock. I bet it's because of Yevon. Or, you know, something like that"
"Well, there's more to it than that"
"Hmm?"
"Wakka doesn't like the Al Bhed because of his brother Chappu"
"Oh...he used a machina weapon, right? And got killed by Sin. Killed by my old man. Damn you, Jecht"
"What?"
"Opps! Wrong line! Hey... Can someone, like, a human become Sin ever?""I can't say that I know, but why?"
"Ok, stop it"
"Sin is the punishment for, and the incarnation of, crimes we have committed"
"Seriously, Lulu. Stop"
"There's no need to know, so no one asks. You run or you fight. That is really all you can do. There's no sense brooding over it"
"Lulu!
Shut the Hell up!"
"You really do come from a world
where there is no Sin, like you say..."
"I'll run this car off a bridge! I swear to Yevon! Shut up!"
Well, I had something really funny for my author's note, but I forgot it... Oh, as for my desc. I'm not a happy camper. I'm a happy C.I.T. Hehe. Well, I would still like dress sphere suggestions for a Yuna costume. Any are good except thief, gun mage, alchemist, warrior, dark knight, berserker, songstress, lady luck, and trainer. None of these can fit inside of a mascot costume, or aren't movable (Ok, that's just trainer, but whatever). What does this leave? Samurai, black mage, and white mage, and gunner. Tell me in your review. And you WILL review, or I will hunt you down and gut you like a fish (This means YOU, Shea and Jarrett). Haha, this'll be funny. Anyone know where I could get that plushy Yuna carries as a mascot? And if anyone figures out how to make a tear-away moogle costume tell me. $10 says Jarrett says the word 'Amazing' in his review. Well, I finally found myself on the internet. XD IT'S AWESOME! Go to the Cartoon Network website and search for elections. Watch the one called 'The people have spoken'. The last person is Shea. XD I JUST LOST ALL RESPECT FOR YOU SHEA! It's so funny! Bwhahaha! Gak! I fell out of my chair. Well, here I go. I'm gonna try and be Spiraless for 2 whole weeks. Yep. Here I go. Nooo Spira at all. Out in the big, bad world with no Tidus to talk to in my head. Yessirie! No Hymn of the Fayth to be stuck in my head. No wearing my gunner costume under my clothes............ I'm screwed. AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! AAAHAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! R-R-RIKKU AND RAVEN! THEY HAVE THE SAME VOICE ACTOR! WHY HAVE YOU GONE TO THE DARK SIDE?! WHY DID YOU HAVE TO GO TO DC COMICS! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! -.- I just fell through my deck...
