Disclaimer: Yeah, right. When pigs fly. (A pig is seen outside the window with fluffy, white wings, flying.) Woo-hoo! (glomps Paris to the floor) You can claim you boys, girls! (gets smacked with a briefcase) Ow! Fine, be that way. Evil lawyers…

Enigmagirl2727: Thank you! It is very fun to write. No, that was about the Hitchhiker's trilogy.

Nicky Potter: Why aren't you signed in? Just wondering… Yeah, I know it was short, but I couldn't really do much more until I got the bathing suits. Yeah, about that… Legolas won't give it up, and neither will Aragorn, sorry.

PrincessofRain: Boredom can be a dangerous thing. See what it made me do? (points to story) Thanks for reviewing!

Tera Earth: Yeah, that's where I got it from. (still a bit flustered) (quote fingers) "Eh… I was being odd at that point. I wasn't quite sure what order I wanted them to come in… so… (gets all flustered) Shut up." (end quote fingers) Pretty much I was being stupid and not paying attention. (points menacingly) Do not mock the authoress! (can't hold a straight face for beans)

Random Questioning Elfmaid: Oooh yeah! No coincidence there. It is two to the power oftwohundred and seventy-six thousand, seven hundred and nine to one against me just choosing that exact same thing randomly. Thanks for reviewing, even if you didn't say anything about my actual story. (is in a good mood)

Dark Borg Drone: Well, I was kinda hoping for like, a color… or something…

Ara Goddess of the Broken: Oooo, a techie! I know a lot of people at school who really like the theater tech. Cool. I can totally understand the swim/board shorts thing, the only reason I sometimes don't wear them is because my mom gets all snarky and says, "Why are you wearing those?" I may 'defy' her this summer, though. :D Oh, oh! I love the 60' 70's stuff! I'm more of the 'beach' music (also known as mom's) than the… other… stuff… I don't know what to call it (dad's music). I do like both though. Kiss, Kool and The Gang, Ozzy, Pointer Sisters, The Surfaris, Beach Boys, Warren Zevon, Mr. Mister, (my mom wanted to name me Kyrie after one of their songs. No 'a' sound at the end) Joan Jett, Bangles, Bananarama, B52's, AC/DC, then Love Machine and Hey Mickey, but I don't know who those are by.

Aussiesportstar: Oh, surf and body board? Oh my effing god. That will be hilarious. Next chapter, maybe…only I don't know how. Beach volley ball might be pretty interesting, too. Okay, tattoos and piercings, cool.

Rose-eye-Blonde91: Yes, a lovely surprise. I'm pretty sure you will like hi- (gets whacked by Paris) Um, it. Let's test out my wonderful spell check for this. Graffiti. There we go. I love spell check, except that it catches all of the pennames and is annoying about that. Okay, I think I can imagine the top… okay, and the bottoms aren't hard. (laughs) Cute. I don't think you would be able to see them…

Ow. I touched the rack in the oven and burned myself. It had been set to 400 for several minutes. (puts a damp washcloth wrapped around an ice cube on her finger)

(Paris is heard making disparaging remarks)

Shut it, boy!

Yeah, there are some MAJOR plot holes, like why they do this now and not before, and why this wasn't noticed before, but bear with me, it will be funnier if you ignore it.

Congradulations to Ara! She has simply replaced Angie, as I don't wish to have to re-write parts of this chapter.

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"Just like, go into the walk in closet and change." Sara said.

"All of us?" Gabriel asked.

"At the same time?" Will asked.

"Yeah…" Sara replied.

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The girls were all in the downstairs bedroom, where no one could see in. They were all changing quickly, practically ignoring each other. When one finished, she would pretend to be fascinated by something on the wall, floor, or tabletop. When a second finished, they started talking quietly. It continued, until they were all done.

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"Just face the wall or something, and don't turn around until you are all finished." Sara got her bathing suit out, too. "Oh, and you aren't allowed to come out until I say you can, 'cause I'm changing in here. Now go!" They all went in.

Sara's bathing suit was a bikini bottom with yellow binding at the top and a shoreline view of what seemed to be Hawaii or Tahiti or something lovely and tropical like that. There were also some plumeria printed on it.It came with a halter top/takini kind of thing that had the same view on it. She also put on a pair of blue and black Teva sandals.

"Sara!" Aus called, sounding happy on sugar.

"Yo?" She said, opening the door.

"Oh, you look good in that." Aus said.

"Thanks, you look good, too." Aus was in a Australian flag bikini, that showed her belly-button ring and two tattoos, one of a pink, flaming trinity knot on the small of her back, and the other the southern cross on her left shoulder.

"So, where's the eye candy?" Eruanne asked. She was wearing a pretty two piece in blue.

"Oh, that's right. Hey! You guys can come out now! Come on in, girls." She stepped away from the door, and the girls practically tumbled over each other to get in to see their boys. And promptly fell over laughing.

Legolas, Aragorn, Will, and Gabriel all had their arms crossed up high on their chests, as if trying to cover themselves. Paris was the only one who had his hands in his pockets on the sides of his trunks, looking completely at home in only that.

"Come on, get them comfortable in their new attire," Sara said, taking Paris's hand. "I'll meet you guys downstairs. I need to do something." She towed Paris out and down the stairs, but not before he could cast a suggestive glance the guy's way, wink wink.

Sgt. Keira was already running her fingers down Gabriel's chest. Or at least as well as she could with his arms there. She was wearing a two piece, camo bikini, showing a roaring, clawing panther on the small of her back.

"Hey!" Aus called, from the floor where she was kneeling. Everybody looked over. "He has smooth legs!" She started rubbing them a bit, one hand on each leg. "It looks like he shaves them!" All the girls laughed.

"Do you?" Aragorn asked. Boy, just when you think you know someone...

"I most ceirtantly do not!" He protested, the tips of his ears turning pink.

"You know that means he does." Ara said. She was in black bikini, with a pair of board shorts.

"That's not natural for a male to shave his legs." Gabriel told him, now comfortable, with an arm draped over the shoulders of Sgt. Keira and Ella, who was wearing a halter style top, covered in black, orange, pink and white graffiti, and a pair of black boy shorts with a heart on the right cheek.

"Well it's better than you, you have bear legs." Legolas fumed. He still had his arms crossed, and Aus was resting her head on one of his arms and petting the other.

"Burn." Eruanne said into her fist, smiling. They started to argue back and forth a bit.

"Stop it, both of you." Will said, his arm around Ara's waist. "You both have freaky, unnatural looking legs. Now stop this bickering and let's go downstairs, Sara's waiting." The two cast hateful looks at each other, but followed Will downstairs.

When they got down, Sara was just coming out of the storage room with some straw sand mats under one arm, and Paris had some too. They handed one to each girl, each would hold two cozily, but three was a squeeze.

"We ready? Good." She opened the sliding glass door that led onto the small deck with steps that led to a boardwalk made of Trex© (It's like wooden decking, but it's like, recycled plastic or something, so no rotting or splintering. Grey, like weathered wood.). From there it was only about a minute walk down to the beach. If that.

As they reached the end of the boardwalk, we see a young man with dark, curly brown hair running from left to right across the beach, so fast it seemed he was hardly touching the wet sand at all. Then chasing after himwas Liese.

"Nein, dammit!" She yelled. The group continued on.

Then, they caught sight of a figure walking drunkenly towards them. Ella gasped.

"Can it be?" She breathed. The gap closed slowly. "The stuff dreams are made of." She said, and sprinted toward the figure.

"No!" He yelled. Too late, he got tackled to the dry sand.

"Jack Jack Jack!" Ella squealed happily. The rest of the group came over to see her straddling his chest, legs bent behind her, clapping out of sheer excitement.

"Welcome, Captain." Sara greeted him. "You have been summoned here by my amazing powers as an authoress. The better you behave, the more pleasant your stay will be." He looked around at everybody, then caught sight of Will.

"Will? Who's the girl? What happened to Elizabeth?"

"This is Ara." He said. "And Elizabeth…"

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Cut to a small desert island. On it, we see a few sparse trees, Helen of Troy, Elizabeth Swann, Arwen, and a rather burnt and smoking Anna Valerious, all sitting in a circle on the sand.

"Got any threes?" Arwen asked.

"No, go fish." Helen replied.

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"I'm really not sure." He finished. Ella let Jack stand, but didn't let go of his arm. He quickly became accustomed to having a girl (in his mind) so scantily clad hanging on his arm.

The sand mats were unrolled, and all of the couples sat on their respective mats. Some of the girls just laid their heads on a shoulder, some were sitting on a lap, and others were snogging. (coughAUScough) Sorry.

"Wait," Legolas said, pulling away from Aus. "Let me see…" He took her by the chin gently, and made her open her mouth. "What is that?"

"I got my tongue pierced." She said, smiling. He nodded, a bit unsure.

"Unfortunatly, I know exactly how you found that out. Didn't need to know that much." Sara said.

"How would you know that?" Paris asked. There was a collective groan from the girls, and a few shocked faces from the guys.

"You are a prime contender to be the Man-Whore of the year, and you don't even know something like that?" Eruanne said, taken aback.

"Shall I show him, girls?" She asked.

"Yes!" Everybody chorused.

"Alright then. Come 'ere." With a hand on each side of his head, she pulled him over and kissed him. When they finally parted, Paris looked a bit shocked, or confused.

"You," He started. "You rolled your tongue in my mouth."

"Thank you 'That 70's Show'." She said, then smiled at him.

"Do it again." He said, then brought her in close. It wasn't long before they were lying down on the sand mat.

The others looked at each other, and decided it was a good idea and followed suit.

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Yeah, couldn't think of anything else. I will try to update again soon.