A/N: This is just a one-shot that came to me as I was watching TV one evening. I guess, I was trying to think of ways to get Grissom and Sara's relationship moving, and I thought "Hey, having Sara seriously hurt would probably get Grissom's head out of his butt." So, here it is. Enjoy.
Disclaimer: They're not mine. Never have been, never will be.
He never knew the repetitive sound of heart monitors could be so reassuring. Grissom had always believed that the sterile hallways and rooms of a hospital were filled with gloom and anxiety. But as he sat here, in this quiet room, the rhythmic beep of the machine reassured him that she was still with him.
His weary eyes gazed on the Sara's pale face. If he didn't know any better, he would have thought that she was just sleeping. Her face was calm and peaceful, and the sheet that was pulled up to her chin masked the tubes and bandages that were evidence of just how close he had come to losing her.
He couldn't believe that they were here. It was just a few short hours ago that they had left to go to a routine crime scene. It had come in as a B & E, and with everyone else out at other crime scenes, Grissom and Sara were the only ones who responded. All Grissom could remember was the sound of a door opening behind him; he had turned to see what the sound was, and the entire room had exploded in gunfire. He had instinctively tried to throw his body over Sara's to shield her, but it was obviously too late. The deputy with them had been able to shoot the gunman whilebeing shot himself. When it finally quieted, Grissom looked down to help Sara up, and his heart had stopped at the sight of blood starting to seep through her shirt. After that, everything else had become a blur. The only thing Grissom was able to do was pray as the paramedics came and rushed her to the hospital. There, she was immediately taken to surgery, and Grissom was left to pace anxiously and try to answer Nick's and Warrick's and Catherine's questions that seemed to have no answers.
But now, he was here, beside her again. The others had left him there after he'd snapped at Catherine when she suggested that he go home for a little rest. He didn't need any rest; he only needed to be beside her. To be there when she returned to the world, to him. Seeing her there, so fragile and wounded, loosened his tongue.
"Sara, I know I haven't always treated you the best. No, that's not right. I know I've treated you like crap. You gave up everything to come here. You joined the team when they didn't trust you, when they resented you, when they outright hated you, and yet you stayed. You could have left at any time, but you didn't. You stayed here, for me, and I never appreciated that. I tried to not show you any special treatment, because I was afraid of my feelings, of how I would react to you, and I didn't want anyone to know what was in my heart. Then, I guess, it just became second nature, to hide my feelings from you, and I stopped thinking about how you might be suffering." Grissom shifted slightly in his seat. "Then, when you invited me to dinner, I think I just reacted without thinking. I was so afraid that I would hurt you, because I'm, well, really bad at relationships, so I guess I thought that in trying to get you to think that I wasn't interested, I was actually protecting you. I know, I know, it doesn't really make a whole lot of sense looking back, but that is what was going through my head at the time. I know that you were heartbroken, but you never let on. You just continued to be a professional, and never let it get in the way of our working relationship.
"I did see a change after that, though. You began to hold me at arm's length. I didn't feel that same camaraderie that I had felt for the past three years. And I mourned that. I guess that why I began rambling with Debbie Marlin's killer. I had been up for two or three days straight, and I wasn't thinking rationally. I had just seen a glimpse of the future, a vision of what my life would be like if you weren't in it, and it terrified me. And I let my feelings get away from me. I think I knew in my head that you would be able to hear me, but my heart was controlling my body at the time, and I wasn't able to stop.
"Then, last year, you shared with me your darkest secret. You trusted me with that knowledge, and I began to feel that there was hope for us again. I know that you were hurt when you heard that I had gone to dinner with Sofia, but it wasn't a date. Well, maybe it was, but it was a test to me. I wanted to see if another woman could get my mind off of you. I should have known that that was impossible. There will never be anyone who can make me forget about you.
"So, I'm telling you now. I love you. I have loved you for so long that it's a part of me. It's a part of my inner being. I can't separate it anymore and put it into a little compartment like I could before. I don't want to hide who I am and how I feel about you anymore. I don't care what anyone else thinks. But I can't be in love alone. I understand now how you've suffered all of these years when you thought I didn't care. The pain and agony I feel right now is more horrible than anything I've ever felt before. Please come back to me. Come back, and let me make up for all of those years that I broke your heart in my ignorance. Come back to those of us who love you and care for you. I can't imagine my life without you. I don't want to imagine my life without you." Grissom began to weep silently, harsh tears slipping down his cheeks. "Come back," he begged, "Honey, please come back to me."
Grissom dropped his head to rest on the bed as he continued to sob harshly. Then, softly, he felt a gentle hand rest on his hair. Thinking it was Catherine coming back to try and get him to rest again, he raised his head to send her away. But as soon as his eyes came up, they immediately locked onto rich, dark brown ones. Sara mouth curved into a soft smile as she whispered, "I'm back."