A Diary
Chapter 13: I hate myself for losing you
I stood there for a long time. What was I going to say to that! I was crying pretty hard now. I loved him so much… why did he not love me! Why did he lead me on if he was just going to leave! I hated myself for loving him right now! I felt like curling up in my own little world and sulk there but I knew I couldn't. I had to go back outside to take care of the rest of my animals. I guess the bull knew I wasn't felling very happy because he didn't give me a little buck in the back like he usually did when I got into the pasture. I started to stop crying because I didn't want to worry anyone. I had made so many friends here with people… I loved taking over my dad's farm… it was the closet I could get to him right now. I knew mom missed me and I could always come back home… but… I just couldn't give up that easy. If I was the old Naomi that came here 1 year to this day I would have left in a heart beat. I use to not do well under pressure but being on a farm meant being responsible for others… not just me. I then felt a tap on my shoulder. I was hoping it was Marlin but it wasn't, it was Rock.
"What do you not get about go away!" I screamed wanting to punch him! "What did you say to Marlin! Why are you obsessed with ruining my life!" I wasn't going to be nice to Rock! I really would have punched him but he stopped me.
"Naomi! I'm sorry ok! I was dumb! I love you… I didn't say anything to Marlin so why are you blaming this all on me!"
"You said something to him and now I just want you to leave me alone! You don't love me and even if you do I hate you! You ruined my life!" I said now collapsing to my knees I was crying so hard I was getting dizzy. I hated everyone right now! I never had felt so mad and upset at the same time in my life and all over a boy… but he wasn't just some boy… I loved him so much. I knew I shouldn't just lash out at people like that but I didn't know what else to do! I felt two arms around me and I wanted to push away but I was so tired and upset I didn't have the energy. I just cried.
"Naomi I'm sorry… I will leave you alone… but I want to be your friend… I don't what you to hate me. I was really mad at the party. I did some stupid things… you don't have to ever trust me again but… I really want you to be my friend. I didn't want this to happen. Stop crying please." I looked up at him. I was still pretty mad but I didn't feel so vicious anymore. I pushed him away and walked back to the house.
"It might take a long time for me to trust you again Rock but… maybe some day." I said walking into the house and locking the door. I knew that leaving here would be the easiest thing to do but… I loved this place now. It was a love hate relationship and I couldn't decide what to do. I feel asleep. I was so tired form crying and staying up late the other night and I woke up at about 4 in the morning the next day. I rubbed my eyes. I knew I had to make a decision today. I had to talk to Marlin. If he really didn't love me then I would move on… but what if it was something else that I could fix! I got ready to go. I did nothing special I wanted him to see me, not some fake prettied up Naomi. I walked over to the beach first. I needed to think. I saw Nami and Gustafa walking around holding hands. It was the oddest and cutest thing it made me smile. Nami had pushed Gustafa away so much and yet all he had to do was brake her down and make her feel special. I knew they had a future together and I was hoping it would be a happy one. I was feeling pretty flustered and I couldn't keep myself away anymore. I got up and walked over to Vesta's farm and luckily Marlin was outside working on the plants all by himself. I walked up. I didn't really know what I was going to do. He didn't notice me at first.
"Marlin." I said quietly. He looked up and then looked back at is work. "Marlin I have to talk to you. I can't move on and tell I get the truth. Even if the truth means you don't want to see me again. I want to know if you really don't love me… if you don't then that's fine but… I love you Marlin and I don't want to lose you this easily." He didn't look up but he did stop working. I took that as a sign of getting his attention and I kept talking. "I thought maybe I meant something to you but maybe I didn't… I just want to know if you ever loved me… and if you did why did you stop? Maybe I can fix it… I will try anything if you will just look at me again. He the stood up but he didn't look at me still.
"Naomi I'm doing you a favor don't make this harder then it already is." He said looking at his feet.
"A FAVOR! Marlin you broke my heart! What are you talking about! I thought that that kiss meant something! Was it a pity kiss?" I was starting to cry again but I pushed the tears back hoping that he wouldn't notice.
"No I wasn't pitying you! I love you Naomi… but you don't need a guy like me… you will be much happier with someone else." He said stuttering. I swear I thought he was going to cry to but I don't think he did.
"I don't want someone else! What are you talking about! Did Rock say something to you? I love you! I don't think I will ever fall in love with anyone else but you!" I caught his eye this time and he just stared at me.
"Naomi I… I love you but…" I interrupted him.
"But what? I love you to! I want you Marlin so if you want me then take me because I'm still here. I don't think I can stay here if you don't… I think I will move back to the city and move on if you don't take me. So I guess my question is this… Do you love me or not. I then just stared at him and there was a long silence. Then he looked me right in the eye.
"I love you Naomi, I want to live the rest of my life with you! I just didn't want to hold you down… you could have so much better then me! Why do you want me so bad?" I hugged him so hard.
"Marlin! I want you because I love you! You're the best in my eyes! I want to live a life with you to!" I smiled and held on to me tightly to.
"You know I'm all dirty from working goofy." He said with a little laugh.
"I don't care as long as I can hold you again." I said quietly. We stood like that for a long time. I was so glad he didn't hate me! I was so glade to be in his arms again! He kissed me for a long time I felt so happy.
Dear diary,
I don't know what day it is! Cliff and me are married now and I'm sorry I pushed you aside for so long because its bin a long, long, long, long time because we just had a baby girl! Her name is Timber and she is the cutest thing I could ever ask for. Ann is doing fine now and where actually good friends again. My life seams complete right now. My animals are great and the crops are blooming beautifully! I hope that my life stayed this way forever and now I must tell you something…
I turned the last page of the diary but I was shocked at what I had found. The last page was gone! I smiled a little. hmmm well that's a downer I thought as I looked at Marlin sleeping next to me. He had moved back in after that day. We were also getting married later in the spring. I took a deep breath. I wonder were that page is now?
Far away some were unknown Timber stands looking at the night sky. I'm glade we left Mineral Town she thought to herself. Here two girls were asleep and so was her husband but she couldn't sleep. She holds a crinkled page…
"I wish you were still here with us mom." She whispers softly as she looks at the torn page. And it reads.
That something is that I wish to anyone that reads this that it gives him or her inspiration to move on in their life. I also hope my baby girl Timber will live her life to the fullest and get through the dark times to get to her dreams. My you always have hope.
Rorie
Then there was a picture of Timber as just a baby, Cliff, and her mother all happy and well. Timber looks up at the night sky just as Naomi does and they both say.
"I wish life would stay like it was right now forever."
The EndAwa it's over! Now I have to say thanks you 2 all my reviewers so far!
Lexy499: You have read the story from the start and I think you are the coolest person ever! I hope your game is going well! I don't think I will be seeing the last of you because you said you were maybe going to send in a character for my new story coming soon "Timber". You rock! People like you are why I write! You're my most loyal reviewer!
Mineral Town Queen: You are soooooo sweet! Your reviews made me feel like writing more and more! Your stories are good to and I hope you will keep writing!
Not telling you: Thank you for reading! You maid me laugh at some of your odd and funny reviews! I wouldn't have written this story if I don't have anyone to thank! I mean come on writers are nothing without reviewers! Thanks for reading!
Naoki07: You are such a great writer and you have such kind words to say! It makes me sooooooo happy! I love your stories and I hope you keep writing! Thanks for being so nice!
SSJBryan: Thanks for reading! I'm glade you kept with me through those Rock parts:)
I think that's all of you! Hope you enjoyed it like I did!
You guys are the best,
Aries Goddess