4. Idane
Dumbledore was sitting behind his desk, the Pensieve to the side, and greeted Harry merrily.
"Come in, come in my boy!
"I've heard about your attempt at making good with your Potions Professor. While I understand that you have failed utterly – the Professor was angry, blaming me for forcing students to do my bidding, now he would, of all people! – and have not yet reached an understanding about further Occlumency lessons. This attempt will, however, suffice as a reason for beginning to tell you his story, like I promised. I reckon that you two will come to an agreement eventually. Time is running short..."
This brought events back to Harry's mind, but he thought is useless to say that this would never work. He'd said that a dozen times or more already.
"You've earned the right to see the beginning of things, at least. None of it is secret or untold. Even Severus could not object to my telling you in the end, nor would he be in a position to disagree with my telling. It will also give you an impression of what lies ahead of you... But do have some tea!"
"I- I'd rather have pumpkin juice, sir..."
"Of course, of course, my boy!"
At a flick of the Headmaster's wand, a plate with a variety of sweets and a huge glass of perfectly chilled juice appeared.
Dumbledore waited until Harry had sipped a bit of the juice and finished off a couple of gingerbread, and then began his story.
"Well, my boy, this is the story of how Severus Snape came to join our fold and eventually the Order. It will explain fully, I believe, why I trust that capable young man quite unconditionally. It will show you his true strength, why and how he became to be what he is, and will also tell you some bits about your parents, and others you know, or have heard about. It should solve some –er, riddles... for good, I hope."
"Why is no-one telling me about my parents straight-out," Harry exclaimed angrily. "Didn't they have a life of their own!"
"Yes they did," Albus Dumbledore said, regarding the young man patiently, "such as was completely uneventful, filled with joy, and loving each other, and everyday affairs, and menial tasks, and those minor mishaps, little squabbles, and nuisances that not even lovers are spared... utterly peaceful and uneventful, regardless of your father's work, until the very day... they died."
Harry hung his head.
"I'd have loved to have had such a life... What was his work, anyway?"
"I know, my boy, you would; in hindsight, everyone would. But do not expect me to repeat to you the daily routine of a happily married couple expecting their first child, or of the year they had you and you had them: I do not know much about that, and frankly, you yourself would be bored footless within ten minutes. The changing of diapers is only of marginal interest to anyone, beyond the actual moment, even if they are one's own..."
Dumbledore had completely ignored the second part of what Harry had asked, and his words did not go too well with him either.
"No, don't jump at me, Harry; it's nice to live it, but extremely dreary to report or listen to.
"Consider: James gets up in the morning, brushes his teeth, wakes Lily with a kiss, they get up, prepare breakfast together, he strokes her rounding stomach, and kisses her again before he leaves.
"She stays at home, but not only because of her pregnancy with you: she's an author of children's books..."
That was what he should have had, what was his by right! So peaceful! The whirl of emotions Harry felt, triggered by just a few sentences said in a quiet voice, the craving, and the anger, loneliness, and self-pity, among so many other things, made him feel faint.
Yet at the same time, he knew that he could not take any more of it – the loss was blinding. Harry felt tears run over his cheeks. AND it all was not real, it was made up and commonplace, a cheap fairy tale for a very lonely boy – unless he'd be able to see it in a Pensieve... It would probably even then not go beyond the reality of one of those Muggle television features Aunt Petunia loved to watch, and shed tears over. He wiped his face. The story was no comfort, but not boring either... yet.
He shook his head a couple of times to get rid of the emotions and then, rubbing his eyes, looked again at the old wizard.
"Ok..."
"Well, just let me tell you once more that, for all I know, they were quietly, peacefully, contentedly happy together, and quite in love, until... well, until the end. Which would be more than most people have, see?"
Harry said nothing for a moment, then, between clenched teeth, ejected: "I do want to take that bastard down."
"I know that, and while that attitude might constitute a problem in itself, the necessity of it being done is why you HAVE to work with Severus Snape which, in turn, is the reason for your being here."
"But..."
"No buts, Harry. I forced your Potions Professor to agree to let me tell you and show you his story in order to open you more for... well, other people's losses and developments, and I will not have you back out, either. You will remain here tonight until I feel that you've come to know enough for a day, and you will return at appointed times to do more listening and watching."
"Well, yes, sir."
The boy gave in, knowing the futility of objecting to the Headmaster's decisions.
"Here you go, then. I'll tell you Professor Snape's Story. But at first, we have the story of a most unusual woman: Idane's Story.
"See, my boy, as I said, Professor Snape did love once, hard to believe as that may be for you, Harry.
"Love came like for him a tidal wave or a hurricane, out of the blue and unavoidable.
"It was like the Moonflower that no mortal man is meant to see, as beautiful, as fragrant and fulfilling any desire – and as transitory and poisonous in the end...
"For once, Severus Snape was not the one to question a blessing, which is hard to believe as well, knowing the man today; knowing that he is of an ancient pureblood family of repute and, at the time of events, was a member of the Death Eaters, of Lord Voldemort's inner circle even. It is quite incredible that she, the woman he loved unconditionally and would lose eventually, was a Muggle - but for one of her Granddads, who has been, or more likely, still is today, a giant, from Iceland."
Harry gasped. A giant! He thought of Hagrid, and his troll-like little brother, hidden in the Forbidden Forest. Giants intermarrying with Muggles or wizards seemed not to be altogether rare...
"This giant came from a small but ancient family. Their name is impronounceable to human mouths, and in short and roughly translates as "of the green Mountain". They used to live in the Isles most of the time, but this family has not been heard of since they were harassed by wizards about the allegiance some of their kind were said to have had with Grindelwald; or seen to visit the Isles at all after Muggle hunters and some members of the Ministry of Magic chased the last giants away after Lord Voldemort's downfall. This was done against my advice, unwisely and for rather political reasons – they were accused of generally allying with the Dark Lord, of which there was no proof – nor is there proof of that now, by the way. I do believe that rumour to have been intended as a means of trying to press them into service – not a wise move of Riddle's, but it still might work...
"All of that was just the last step in a history of alienation between our races, growing apart over hundreds of years – giants, Muggles and wizards alike merely growing smaller in spirit, and more protective of what little we've left to call our own...
"Even in Iceland, where elves and dwarfs still have a home, giants are hardly more than a saga nowadays. There is no proof to their existence or whereabouts today, or I'd have sent Hagrid that way – but proof of her extraction, her bones were: she was tall and large-framed, if nowhere near as big as Hagrid or Madame Maxine. The short form, pronounceable form for human mouths of her first name, Idane, also was proof of her extraction to any perceptive witch or wizard. Any Muggle could have known, too, but they wouldn't know a living myth if they bit them."
At that, Harry grinned.
"Not that Idane, even in the years before she met Snape, had often seen it fit to prove any of this to anyone, Muggle or wizard, by the gifts that came with the blood – giants were feared and dreaded by that time in the wizarding world for good reasons. They did not desert their homes without a good fight, and were a childhood's bedtime nightmare of evil tales of long standing with the Muggles.
"Yet neither was she secretive about her origin. She did know about her extraction, which is not common with descendants of giants raised in the Muggle world. Idane was brought up for the most part by her grandmother who told her about her beloved husband. They called themselves Groenberg, to remain inconspicuous, and Idane called herself Groenbergsdottir later on as an artist, as a reference to Iceland. Her grandmother knew all the myths and the truths about that race. Had Idane ever tried to, she would have found what was left of her relatives. Her powers surely had not the extent of those of a real giant of the past, but were great nonetheless...
"Finding them would be a most urgent mission for her, today... And it is not the only reason that I do myself miss her, my boy. Yes, I knew her...
"Giant's powers are not magical in the sense those of wizards but, besides their incredible physical strength, are mostly illusionary, or illusionist, and what Muggles call 'psychological', or even 'magical', in their ignorance. These powers don't work on the physical reality as ours do, yet are far beyond what any Muggle can do. The peaceful kind of giants has never used this power for other reasons than to protect their own – the High Elves we now only remember from history lessons or sagas must have possessed similar, if greater, powers. You might have read some ancient stories about the delusions they managed to build... They were wise and playful, rather than mean and destructive, as tales will have it nowadays – than their degenerate offspring are, mostly...
"Giants are, in a sense, a link between flesh and stone – human life and crystal – they don't feel much pain, nor freeze nor burn, unless someone puts a real effort into torturing them... That is why the haters of non-Human races call them stone-bloods.
"Their women, mainly, had a gift that gave perfection to the illusions they created: the Insight. They'd read the mind of man or Muggle, and build the glamour they would see along the lines of what they feared, or wished, or imagined giants to be like...
"As I said, Idane had inherited some of the illusionary magic and a lot of the Insight, and she used it to make a career in the Muggle art world. As her success grew and she became well-known, she went on to arrange events for Muggles and wizards alike, her beautiful and frail magic weaving veils of dream over the borders between these worlds.
"The most accurate description of her Art, I think, is as of a web of light and imagination, encompassing all the senses. I wish I could show you images of that, but this is the only illusion known to resist recording: on films or photographs, be they magical or Muggle. Her Art looks strangely discoloured and lifeless, and in the Pensieve, be that my memory, or Severus's, or anybody else's, nothing of it is shown at all, even if, by definition, the pictures submitted are memories. We tried that. One only sees the movements, and the few material things she used in the creation of the illusion – fabrics, lights. All that memorably remains of the memory are the fireworks she used a lot. It was unique, you see?
"This magic was so intangible and sweet that no-one could really be sure what it was though I believe there have been rumours of different kinds about her origin at large with British wizardry.
"Everyone loved these events. They were like memories of better days and full of hopes for a future for all the races, together... Well, most everyone did.
"This was how Voldemort became aware of her Art, and sent Severus Snapein to investigate further who had nothing much to do in terms of missions after having fallen from grace with the Dark Lord for a reason that I'll come back to later.
"It seems that Lord Voldemort overcame his first impulse to destroy that beauty when Severus Snape reported the inherent usefulness of the shows. The veil between the worlds was thinned. Of that, the Ministry of Magic did not approve while at the same time they were incapable of proving the use of magic at all, be that improper, unapproved, or otherwise. So the Ministry of Magic always had guards at her performances, which meant less of them elsewhere, and the whole thing might be able to provide a cover to strike out from under for the Death Eaters.
"Severus had not then realised that he was falling in love.
"In the Muggle world where Idane was brought up, she also chose to live, regardless of her ability to see wizard's places (giants always can, and she'd pass for an overgrown witch from the north, being much smaller than Madame Maxine, as I mentioned), and her enjoyment of strolling Diagon Alley occasionally, in her leisure time. She was an artist – even if they are Muggles, they always are closest to the wizarding world these days, and do provide cover for wizards in the Muggle world by being unconventional and often strangely dressed – for Muggles, that is.
"Idane became famous while being still very young for a giant offspring, for her work with fire and light, sound and scent. She started out by designing the lighting and effects for concerts and other kinds of entertainment Muggles have. Later on, she had special events of her own invention that grew steadily bigger and in number. By then, she preferred to work with nature, creating her Art outdoors. Muggles call that open-air, I believe?"
Harry nodded, not entirely sure, but he remembered having heard that term before in a similar context, some rock concert, maybe, and likely from Dudley. Neither was he sure what the old wizard was getting at, but it souonded nice.
"By the time she was of age by human standards, she had her own very successful shows, and outdoor events, and happenings that were the rage with Muggles and wizards alike. She knew how to attract both races by using aspects of the respective Arts of either worlds – actually, she attracted all genders of both worlds, see?
"It was, she was, really special – without ever resorting to her peculiar magic alone, or giving her 'tricks', as Muggles would call them, away, or trespassing wizard or Muggle laws, either – which, as I said, did not prevent the Ministry of Magic from distrusting her.
"The best of her work created allusions between the worlds that made watching it entrancing for each- and everyone. To the Muggles, it was a dream and a fairy tale, and to the wizards, blissful memories and hopes. Moments of utter beauty to draw strength from for everyone... She had a very giving nature."
The old wizard stroked his beard, lost in memories and musings for a moment. Apparently, Dumbledore had liked these shows a lot. Harry was amazed at the sadness in his face, considering what a nice story he was telling right now, and an anticipation of less joyful tales settled in, making him twitch. Dumbledore was talking about that woman in the past tense, and Harry had never heard her mentioned anywhere...
Albus Dumbledore shrugged himself back to the present. What was gone, was gone. He stirred the Pensieve, gazing into the mists for a moment, seemingly thoughtless. Not for the first time, Harry was taken aback by a frailty in the old man that he'd never noticed a mere six months ago. Only since after the fight in the Ministry... Harry felt guilt settle upon him every time he thought of that event – not just because of his godfather's death.
The impression vanished as the Headmaster continued.
"In fact, I was one of the first admirers of her Art among wizards...
"This is awkward to tell for me, Harry... Not only Professor Snape has misgivings about this...
"I will try not to sound fluffy or threadbare... I am not used to talk about these events. They are much more a part of his life than of my own of course, nor does anyone really want to recall them, to be honest. This is why you very likely have never heard about her.
"His permission to tell you was very reluctant. I guess I'll find my voice eventually."
The old wizard cleared his throat.
"So, quarter-giant, Muggle-born artist Idane came to meet Severus Snape at one early event of hers near a seaside resort, commissioned by the Muggle Tourist Board. It was summer, and Severus was a little over 20 then. He'd just finished the final part of his apprenticeship and was setting out to become a Master of his Art. From what he told me later, he was Lord Voldemort's foremost Potions master already at the time, with occasional duties of an experimental kind that he does not wish to be reminded of.
"Severus Snape of course was not a Professor at the time. Voldemort had sent him in, with some other Death Eaters, to find out whether this woman and the kind of things she staged in both worlds might be a threat to his cause, or useful, or negligible. She was beginning to grow famous with wizardkind.
"The previous year, Voldemort had sent Severus Snape to Hogwarts, to me, to apply for the post of Potions Professor, and I accepted him readily. I knew of his temper of course, but the resident Potions master had become really forgetful over the last few years, and his hands were not sure anymore either. There was no-one about far and wide who was competent to do that job, not to mention a Master, and I was happy to take Severus on. I did not know or suspect that he was a Death Eater even for a moment.
"Severus Snape, however, was not accepted by the students, some of whom, now in their final year, had still known him while he was a student himself. He botched it completely and left at the end of the year, which I greatly regretted. It was easy to see though that there was no use in a recommenment of his teaching after the summer holidays. This failure he was punished for vilely by his master, in addition to being removed from inner circle service for some time.
"When Lord Voldemort told him to report on that stone blood woman, Severus Snape took it to be his chance to make good and come into grace again.
"The Death Eaters did not disturb that particular show or stage a raid then nor did they later on, but witch folk in particular was unsettled that evening. Muggle newspapers later blamed the tension of that night on an approaching thunderstorm. So, Severus Snape got close to the artist, not expecting to be noticed, but Idane did, and they talked. Idane had perceived the Death Eater presence at shows before, been greatly disturbed by it, and perceived him to belong to that intrusion somehow, but apparently did not consider him Dark of himself, or did not care.
"Eventually, Idane managed to screen herself from such influences in part, which was of great importance to her success later on. You might imagine, Harry, how, due to the imaginary kind of her Art, any disturbance of such a massive sort would endanger the progress of a show... By her own attempts, the success in keeping unwanted influences out was erratic. It depended on her mood and other influences, which made for a very unpredictable quality of her early performances. This was where Occlumency, as the Art and Science of systematically shielding oneself, came in.
"To my shame, I must admit that I never thought of it even while we talked about those difficulties. I was able to confirm that the disturbance was real, and not something she'd imagined, but considered it rather the sum total of the spirit of the time. Severus Snape, knowing otherwise, taught her, with his Dark master's permission at first, I believe… But I'll come back to that later.
"So, young Severus Snape was fascinated with Idane's work. From what I did gather, they mostly talked theory at first – about Arts and Crafts, Muggle and wizard, and the possible use of chemistry or potions of some kind in Idane's performances. Your Professor-to-be had lots of ideas in that field, and they were received with great interest. It seems that those conversations gave her some of the ideas that she was able to realise later on, with Severus's assistance, and which made her really famous. Apparently, the two detected a relation between his and her Arts, and were able to put that to work. They must have come to a close understanding right away. The Potions master himself was not merely amazed that what he'd thought to be a dumb Muggle, or even a mudblood, could quite thoroughly understand Potions as an Art, but was taken in by her.
"He fell for her then once and for all, which took them both, I believe, some time to realise.
"You know him – if Professor Snape's ever struck a dislike, there is hardly a way of changing his mind. His likes and preferences are like that, too, he sticks to them unconditionally and loyally. He even bestows those feelings on later generations…"
The old Headmaster twinkled. Harry snorted.
"Those judgements are, amazing in such a rational man, based entirely on instinct, and he rarely fails..."
At that, Harry snorted again.
"And Voldemort? And ME? How can you expect me to take lessons with him again if you know that, sir?"
"There are other things involved there, Harry... You'll hear about them. It is necessary, and Professor Snape understands that necessity as such very well, if he would love to deny it here. He also has a strong sense of duty. I hope you can understand that eventually, too. It is not normally a happy subject, and not something young ones should have to consider to such an extent… But let me continue my story.
"His fascination with the woman Idane and her Art was immediate, and became love eventually, strong enough to eventually override some of his loyalties, later on. You may take that as an indication of the extent of his passion… As I said, he did not know at first what had happened to him.
"Severus Snape reported to Lord Voldemort that she could be considered rather useful and, with his master's consent, started to support her. This was done to prepare a fence or cover for future Death Eater activities, as such a thing might turn out to be useful, and took place exclusively in the service of the Dark Lord, of course – at first. Professor Snape started out by finding locations for her shows on his own, offering them to her, and she often accepted. They both meant to have more of them within the wizard world, if for different reasons.
"He then proposed the addition of semi-magical gimmicks that he would come up with as a spice for the wizards, and got her permission. Your Professor is not only a Master of Potions, but most of this was in his area of work anyway.
"The Minister was easily convinced of the good of that, regardless of their initial mistrust. Part of that was owed to more liberal strains in some officials, who were in favour of opening the wizarding world more to the Muggles, or liked Idane's Art themselves, and part of it was achieved by bribing or other offers from the hands of Death Eaters like Lucius Malfoy. I am sure she never knew about that last bit of it.
"Soon, Idane G. and Severus Snape were working together on the shows. She seemed to enjoy having him around."
Another snort from young Potter let Dumbledore raise an eyebrow, but he did not interrupt his storytelling.
"Severus sort of managed her for the wizard world, putting in family money. Your Professor proved to have quite a hand in that management thing – it gained him a multitude of what he put down. The whole of that was of course very much a Muggle concept... It does not sound like him, does it?"
Dumbledore smiled at the boy in front of him who shook his head.
"But still more amazing was something else: can you imagine Severus Snape being PLAYFUL? Laughing at jokes, even cracking one himself, occasionally? Being unabashedly, honestly happy?"
The old Headmaster hid a grin at the mixture of disbelief and annoyance in Harry's face. The bewilderment of the boy helped him to cope with his own rising sadness. It would do Harry good to get over some of the prejudices that incapacitated him so. He could never hide his emotions... At that thought, Dumbledore had no difficulty growing serious again: Harry would have to learn just that, and soon, or be in great danger.
He went on. "Severus Snape was happy in those days, I assure you – in that short year with her. Not at all like the morose and irascible student I remembered, and not like the bitter, abrasive Professor you know."
"Only too well," murmured Harry defiantly. Dumbledore ignored it.
"I know because I attended many of these events, being one of her sponsors of the first hour. I did put money into the shows myself, too, so I met my former student, and teacher-to-be, again. Again, at that time I'd never have believed him to be a Death Eater. His whole personality was so opposite to what I knew the average Death Eater to be like that such a thing seemed impossible. He also seemed to have changed greatly since his first attempt at teaching. There are great acting capacities in him, you see.
"It was in those days that Idane became really famous for her work and its beauty, and not least because of Severus Snape's support.
"She was special, Harry, bringing happiness to Muggles and wizards alike – an antidote and a blessing in those dark days.
"Forgive an old man reminiscing like that..."
He paused.
"Voldemort might have continued to support Severus Snape's course of action, but didn't like any of what he heard about it, and the depth of his servant's involvement in it that was reported to him even less. I think that in the beginning, Severus did himself believe in what he told his master: that an event of this sort8, on the day of days, could be the ultimate starting point and hiding place for any large Death Eater operation – neither the Ministry of Magic nor the Muggles would know what hit them and where the attack had come from – and they'd eventually blame it on the artist whom he, Snape, looked upon with contempt. I am not sure if he knew, at that point, of her ancestry, but he surely did not tell Riddle at any time. How Lord Voldemort found out, for at some point he did know, I have no idea. It probably was mere coincidence.
"Severus argued that, for the time being, the shows, with their change of location, should be considered most convenient to gather knowledge. That was no fence, as such performances were attended by people from all walks of life – officials, Ministers Muggle and wizard alike, artists, scientists, even kings and presidents, congregated there. Intelligence of any kind could easily be obtained, and contacts made. But very soon, it was obvious to everyone watching the two that they were falling for each other – long before they knew themselves, actually.
"I think Riddle dispatched a group of his followers to spy on several events, disliking what he suspected – none of which went quite right because of the distractions created by the presence of the Death Eaters, even though Idane knew quite well by then how to shelter herself. I did not attend her shows at the time, being too busy with more pressing and less beautiful matters.
"Concentration and the ability to open herself up to her audience was essential to Idane's Art, and after the first few times, she'd always been able to tell when that undesirable tension-creating presence was there. I could never convince her that this atmosphere was merely a sign of the times that she should counter with her shows, even though she agreed that, of course such an atmosphere must be fought. I was mistaken, too.
"However, even with the fortification she came by by Severus, those intruders could easily spoil a show. Lord Voldemort had to rely on his Potions master's assistance for the information he needed. He even had to consent to have a mudblood instructed in defence against the Dark Arts! Since Sverus Snape had obviously been right in his analysis so far, the Dark Lord let him continue. That Idane's Art was so easily disturbed was just a point in Snape's favour – Lord Voldemort could have it undone whenever he wanted.
"It took young Severus Snape a while to realise what had happened to him – after a couple of months, he almost had a duel over her with another wizard, not a Death Eater, who tried to approach her. Such an act was unheard of in connection with Severus Snape and, once he and Idane had found each other, would not have happened altogether. I believe this duel to be the fateful event that raised Lord Voldemort's suspicion that not all was to his taste with his trusted follower, and that alerted Severus to what was happening in his life...
"Idane herself stopped the fight by throwing both men out of the show. But Severus Snape, she let come back to her... It was by then obvious to those who are perceptive of such things that these two were made for each other. After that incident, they found each other. Later on, they never reacted to baiting and never bothered to fight any insult; it was as if they had become unreachable to any such thing, invulnerable…
"If there have ever been soul-mates, Harry, beyond wishful thinking, these two were just that. Bad words, taunts, and insults slid off them like rain from charmed canvas, and just vanished. Not that there were many, but there were rumours by then, both about her extraction, and his being a Death Eater. Utterly disregarding such talk, Severus Snape was blissfully and very tangibly happy at that time, which was no play-acting, which was part of the reason why I was blind to the rumours about him then. Their tone of voice, between them, was often acerbic, but the underlying deep admiration, respect, and love were never concealed… They seemed to have a language of their own between them, in which words did not mean what they do between strangers – lovers often have.
"Imagine that of your bitter, resentful Potions Professor, today!"
"Yes, he's ever so bitter- and never forgets any insult... even if there was none!"
"Right, my boy, but soon you will understand better why that is so. And, maybe, that it sometimes only seems to be the case...
"So, Severus Soniverirus of ancient pureblood stock, hater supreme of giants, magical creatures, and Muggles, ever contemptuous of "mud-bloods" and halflings in school, came to be the partner of a stone-blood, and soon, Idane's lover."
"Eventually, I gather, he told her what he was, what that meant, and why he'd come to her at first. She seems to not have been upset in the least, but to have suspected something like that. I think she learned a lot about wizarding policies and the Death Eaters by his confession, and was taken aback, but trusted his love, deeply. She knew months before I did where Severus Snape's loyalties lay, and she never told me.
"She was well-loved in both worlds, had access to almost anywhere she wanted to go, and came to hear and see a lot – which she truthfully reported to Severus Snape. She knew what he did, and did not mind at all. Possessed of the Insight, she did not believe in secrecy and secrets at all, considering them the root of all troubles. I do believe she had a point there…
"What she did mind, though, were the aims of Severus's master.
"Before becoming thus involved, she'd not really given much thought to seemingly minor matters, like power-hungry wizard politicians; there were enough of that sort among the Muggles. They did damage, but their petty greeds and deeds tended to balance themselves out... Somehow, like many Muggle-born wizards too, she found it hard to grasp that a relatively small community like that of witches and wizards could be riddled with rivalries of that sort, and endangered by one madman...
"It must have to do with the illusion that the kind of power wizards hold would sort out such things by itself... However, in the Muggle world, she'd never been shy of taking a stand with her work, quite beyond how and where she presented it, but she had bothered never before about the affairs of wizardry.
"Murder and torture were, to her, crimes far worse than lies – which, occasionally, could be justified in the name of a greater good...
"She had always been living her own life, and claimed to know how to keep herself and her friends out of a mess."
Dumbledore paused
"Hm. Not long after she'd come to know, she made me understand in her unique way that she was aware of the Death Eaters, would not mind to let them have information that I should think fit, and tell me what she heard in turn – as long as she would not have to lie Severus Snape to the face, or put him in more danger than she already did by his work with her. Such danger consisted, at that time, mainly in him being thought to be a blood traitor of sorts by Lord Voldemort and his fellow Death Eaters. I didn't know that though. She herself was by then well aware of that point of view. Mind you – I myself believed that her main concern was for her beloved, and not because he was partial in the matter itself.
"Indeed I think she never lied to Severus. He did not then and does not now know everything she did, though! Neither do I of his dealings with Voldemort and on our behalf, by the way, be that then or now. Wouldn't want to know, too. I told you why."
Harry nodded a bit impatiently, wanting to hear more.
"She did not feel that she was double-dealing her lover by this. He'd done that same thing to her before, ever since they met, and she loved him no less. Having become aware of that, she felt she might use her own shows in a manner more in line with her own preferences, and at her own discretion. She deplored the impossibility of art escaping politics, but acted upon the fact once she had accepted it.
"You may find that a rather manipulative attitude, hard to be reconciled with the love in both of them. In a way it is, but she never acted without love. She always saw the whole of the picture, and believed in doing the right thing. It was right to love Severus, and it was right to work against Lord Voldemort. There was no reason to drop either.
"Much later, Severus Snape told me that he was never ashamed to use her shows the way he did, because while they were her Art, and imbued with her essence, they were not her. The visitors of course were not the Art either, even if they constituted a part of the shows since she drew her images in part from their minds: from the dreams, and thoughts, and desires of those present.
"Your Professor was enthusiastic about the scope of things in her work. Yet, Idane was so much more than that! By then, he was totally in love with her, and aware of it. He felt free to interact with her work in any manner he chose. There's a lot of a Potions master's pragmatic approach in that. Her approach was very much that of a giant, pragmatic no less. Severus later said that he'd be disappointed in her if she hadn't done something similar, too.
"I don't think they ever talked about that."
Albus Dumbledore could see that this was becoming too much for Harry, that he probably was presupposing too much even had the young man been raised a wizard. On the other hand, Harry had been warned. He decided not to elaborate further.
"Her offer of course also meant that she trusted me utterly. She was a wonderful woman, very much awake and radiant – but none of that has saved her. Idane was not spared a most cruel and violent death. Never ever once did she consider herself a possible target of a Death Eater attack!"
The old wizard sighed.
"You see, Harry, she was willing to pay a price for the best of all in the form of losing comfort in order to stop what she perceived to be wrong. That is so much more than most people, Muggle or wizard, will do! She had an amazing sense of measure and responsibility, knowing that what was needed was the small share from everyone that they could easily and light-heartedly give: if they were unafraid. She knew that she did not have to go all the way, because a few people giving all they had, while many are not giving a damn, could never be enough, never make enough of a difference, a world whole, or a decent life for all...
"But what little she decided to give effortlessly, turned out to be too much. She did not immediately realise that any political involvement must lead to her exclusion from the wizarding world as soon as the Ministry of Magic would become aware of it. The Ministry was even then too cowardly weak to take action, and, as I said, partly bribed, or pressured.
"Crouch always found it easier to clamp down on those that were rather powerless, even if they appear to be Dark, for effect, much like Fudge does today. … It is not difficult to be merciless against those who have no way of demanding mercy, or even justice... Crouch preferred to ignore goings-on in his house, in the lower ranks, as long as his power was not questioned, but increased. That, of course, was an easy thing to do for Lord Voldemort's cunning and Malfoy's money – the appearance would suffice.
"So, deplorably enough, it was the pressure exerted by people like Lucius Malfoy on the behalf of Severus Snape and his game for Voldemort, that held the Ministry of Magic back at first. You could even say that they paved her way to success, for it is dubitable if she, all by herself, would have managed to obtain the support necessary to stage her Art where and when she wanted to, in all the beautiful locations Severus came up with.
"While a ban in itself, if unspoken, but backed by the Ministry, would not stop any single wizard or witch from attending her shows in the Muggle world, the more "important" people would be forced to stay away, and the shows, hence, lose their value to Lord Voldemort...
"Voldemort eventually decided to withdraw his support, and it became fairly obvious that her shows had become a platform of intrigue and exchange of information that everybody had profited from but the Ministry of Magic. So, she was banned form performing in the wizarding world after less than a year of great success, and quite out-of-the-blue after all the acclaim.
"This meant, too, that she and Severus could not be together inconspicuously anymore. He defended his continuation of management, but Lord Voldemort pressed on him to stop it. Things then had to come to a head. Your Professor was seriously contemplating changing sides, and the lovers were calculating the chances of an escape to the Muggle world. Would Lord Voldemort bother? Would he dare get at them there?
"Had I but known…" The Headmaster sighed. "Had I but known what was to come from that, I'd never have agreed to her offer of information, and would have warned her, but I did not know her intended course of action then... I only watched them from a distance, and did not notice things coming to a head there. It was merely a very secondary stage to the affairs that I was concerned with.
"And I don't think I'd have been able to realise at the time how much Lord Voldemort rejected her Art, because, or probably even although, I loved it so much myself...
"While her death was not connected with our feeding red herrings to the Death Eaters, I could not do anything to help her, and Severus Snape, in those days, would not for all the world have thought to apply to me, his old teacher whom he had disliked (or, at least, believed he had) for being a Muggle-lover and considered his enemy throughout his school days. We'd been civil when meeting around Idane's shows, but that was it. He'd borne me around as Idane's supporter and accepted my investments, being polite because of Idane's liking of my person, and from a desire to not raise suspicions above anything else, and because I was a possible source of information. That was about it.
"Had they but asked me, had I known in time..."
Albus Dumbledore fell silent, his head down.
Then he looked up again, at Harry. Were the old eyes watering a little?
"So, what did happen?" Harry did not feel very much concerned about such reminiscences, touching as they might be.
"Well... this is not easy – not a story a child should be told... Not tonight, in any case..."
"I am no child anymore!"
"Yes, yes, right, Harry; and you have seen much – too much already, I feel! – and stood up to a lot, more than most of us – but this is nasty, really, really nasty, one of the most painful of memories... You would not be listening to me telling old stories had we not decided that you'll have to know about this – and you will understand why soon enough.
"I do have objections, misgivings about this, though... Sometimes I do think that Severus is right, and that there is a trace of your father's early arrogance in you... His power, and more, too... Why would you want to listen to the terrible details?
"Are you never afraid you might encounter something that will break you?"
Harry just stared back and, after a moment, slowly shook his head.
"If I can live now, then I can stand this, too, and look at it."
Dumbledore regarded him closely, sighed, and gave a short nod: "Yes, that is true enough. I'd hoped for an answer like that... You've never had a real childhood, boy..."
Harry shook his head.
"And it's too late now, don't you think? That's partly your doing, too, is it not? Do grace my state with honesty, sir."
It was some fight not to use words like guilt and fault, but he managed – they would not do anyway, the milk had been spilt long ago…
At the harsh and rather Snape-ish expression, Albus Dumbledore almost smiled.
"Right then, so be it."
But instead of continuing the narrative, the old wizard dropped his head and mused, at his hands, it seemed, while aimlessly stirring the silver mists in the Pensieve:
"What a question for me to put, anyway - indeed, I do get old. I wasn't myself afraid of the truth in all my life... Well, until lately, that would be. Neither was James... And you had to suffer from my getting old... Do let me try and make good, please, Harry. And it's always been my intention to let my students have things straight...
"I did believe that, sir, for a couple of years," Harry muttered.
The Headmaster's manner did not give away whether he'd heard; he rambled on.
"Just to make sure that there's no relishing in other people's misery, or the fear and excitement of not having to live through something oneself... Not you, though, you have a life of your own. May this be for the best. Sorry to still be groping around for words – you know that is not my usual way..."
The old wizard pulled himself upright.
"This is difficult and painful to tell. Listen closely, then, Harry. This is, in consequence, as bad as the killing of your parents, as bad as what happened to Neville's parents, even if that is hard to imagine. You might eventually gather why Professor Severus Snape is, today, what he is – how he came to be that bitter and apparently unjust man - and I believe, too, that you will understand why I do trust him – have to trust him when I can – to the fullest extent and quite unconditionally, in a way. And, of course, it will merely confirm what we both know already about the Death Eaters."
Harry's eyes went wide. Hadn't the Potions Professor merely gotten what he deserved for joining forces with Voldemort?
"But I'll show her, Idane, to you first, at the height of their love and success, so you get the picture of what was," said Dumbledore. He put a silvery strain of memory into the Pensieve and motioned Harry to come over to him.
"You're still sure you want to go on? It will be painful..."
Harry just nodded.
"They are leaving a reception the Muggle Prince gave in honour of the great party they did for his 30TH birthday – which was one of the rare events besides her own that, unbeknownst to each other, Witches and Muggles partied together. It was a costume party."
"He knows? The Prince knows?" asked Harry, very surprised
"Of course, and of old! Every Muggle king and queen but one or two have always known about the wizarding world, although there was never one of them endowed with the Gift. But Muggle kings were pretty farsighted anyway, had to be in the old times, and still are, even in those days that they do not bear any real power anymore – must be in the blood, handed down from times when prescience was needed – a rare gift that, as you know. It is rare even in the wizarding world. and sometimes does come with other visionary qualities... And they would have to know, wouldn't they? They never betrayed the knowledge, either.
"Now look. This is quite a sight! Have you ever seen Severus laugh? Really laugh – with bliss, not spite, or anger? Or smile, from his heart? No, right? I don't think, too, that he ever has, since."
Harry bent his head over the Pensieve and saw a huge palace of pale grey stone at a close distance, surrounded by a beautiful park in the sunset. When his nose touched the whirling surface, he fell into the memory as he had before, with the now-familiar pull and jolt. He was within the image – and landed on an incredibly well-cropped lawn that was of an unnaturally bright green, like a carpet.
Then he saw them. In the midst of a cheerful crowd, a couple stepped down the wide stairs of that grey castle, very much the focus of everyone's attention, almost like a bride and groom.
Dumbledore, at his side, read his thoughts, as usual: "Everyone expected them to marry soon enough, their bliss and enjoyment of each other were so obvious - and I think they would have, too, as... but that's for later. Now look."
The woman was tall and apperared to be attractive, but she was mostly hidden from his view. The couple turned toward them from the end of the stairs, chatting and waving merrily – the crowd soon dispelled, and small groups stood everywhere, chatting and laughing.
While they were slowly approaching, Harry had time to observe them closely, and, as fewer of the other guests got in his view, found that he only managed to recognise Severus Snape if he willed himself to. He knew it had to be his Potions Professor, but this man… The Snape of Dumbledore's memory was younger than the one he knew of course, but that was not it. First of all, his hair was much longer, and he wore a ponytail - like Bob Weasley! Harry had to blink. He couldn't believe it! Snape with a ponytail! He just had to tell Ron - and Fred and George!
As they drew closer, Snape in front, Harry watched him approach: a tall, slender man in billowing dark green ceremonial robes that, by their colour, enhanced the radiance of his eyes which were of a dark greyish green, like moss agate, that he had never seen on Snape – nor would have thought possible as an eye colour, either. The pupils were still indiscernible, though. That man had the Professor's familiar and strong jaw-line and beaky nose, and was wearing his hair almost as long as Lucius Malfoy had when Harry last had seen him. It was really well cut and kept, of a shiny black like a raven's wing, and not at all greasy... While Harry looked on, the pale man took out the band that held his hair back, and shook it loose. It looked gorgeous. Harry thought that by doing so, the man did not really look anything more like Professor Snape, even from close-by. The person seemed completely unfamiliar - neither was that upright figure the awkward unhappy boy of the memory he had seen in the Pensieve when Harry's father had tortured him, nor was this the unjust, hate-ridden, and sourly teacher he knew only too well.
He thought fleetingly that maybe, since that other memory had been Snape's, he'd rather seen the man's image of himself, which was unfavourable... But then, why had he witnessed the events from a position apart like he had, last year? He would think about that later... Of course that might mean, too, that Dumbledore had a different, more favourable view of his Professor's looks than Harry, or any other student, was likely to have…
The memory rolled on. There was more here, still: this strange Snape smiled at others when being spoken to and looking around, and smiled even more when he turned to look at the person who came up a bit behind him, still mostly hidden from view by some big wizard walking in front of her. Snape's was a warm, wide smile, the like of which Harry had never seen on him – or on many other people, for that matter. There was even a moment when he laughed out loud – not at all nasty and sneering, but merry, and it did sound nice, too! This laughter and obviously happy attitude and face changed the man, his expression and his whole personality, almost beyond recognition.
Harry thought that this man was really rather good-looking, and probably had an attractive personality as well. He could not have imagined that before. What kind of teacher, of person would he have been, able to smile like this, in a happier life?
Considering, had Snape not even back then been rather pale, he would have looked much like a Red Indian with that aquiline nose and straight and proud bearing. This could have been a younger brother of the Potions Professor he knew, but not even a twin. Fred and George were far more like each other than this Snape was to the Professor Harry knew.
The Snape of the Pensieve extended a hand to someone next to Harry – Dumbledore, of course, smiling –, and with the movement, the woman – woman? – came into full view. She put a hand lightly on Snape's arm, waving at the Headmaster, and was obviously greatly enjoying his presence.
Harry gaped at the image. This was what Harry would have called an apparition or thought to be a giant Veela, much larger though and not of whitish blonde hair at all like those he had seen with the Bulgarian Quidditch team, but as entrancing – a woman that was easily as tall as Snape, rather big-boned indeed, with hair of a golden-brownish tint and not by any ordinary standards beautiful, but – she shone! In her was a light that radiated all around, visible probably even to Muggle eyes. She glowed with a bliss that was contagious. Nothing of the dazing mindlessness that the Veela seemed to induce in men was radiating from her, but quite the opposite: a heightened awareness of the beauty of the world, in everything, of the lust for life, for the love of the things that be; wild like laughter, yet calm and gentle, a spring breeze which made one's breath go deeper and more regularly. Watching her was like a sunny Sunday afternoon spent with one's favourite people and pastime, was as if the sun broke through heavy clouds on a dark day, sparkling off summer rain drops glittering on foliage. It was like the scent of roses and honeysuckle, it... This woman was happiness in the flesh.
Harry laughed, suddenly, leaving the pictures and the Pensievewith a jolt, and found Dumbledore smiling back at him from his chair.
"Idane does that to everyone – almost everyone – even now, from the inside of a mere memory about 20 years old... You'd gaze and laugh when she passed, you'd smile when you'd see a photo, or merely think of her. You'd just love living when she was around! She was a vibrantly living talisman, like an antidote to the poison of the Death Eaters or any other evil and disease; a Patronus in the flesh, if one could imagine such a thing, stopping evil dead in its tracks... It is no wonder that Lord Voldemort wanted her destroyed as soon as she had outlived her use for him.
"I don't think any Dementor would have dared come close to her, they would have burst of overfeeding with happiness."
Harry giggled at that idea. Even the thought of the Dementors had lost its terror momentarily, in the face of these pictures.
"In the end, Voldemort's minions destroyed Idane so that now, while seeing her picture would still bless those who look at it, her memory would be tainted for those few who know what happened – mingled forever with the knowledge of her death, of the way she died – terrible, cruel, and heroic... That would be what everyone would think of, seeing her image – if her death had become known, that is, which was part of Lord Voldemort's intention. We were able to prevent that. Later on, the Ministry of Magic had no interest whatsoever to be reminded of her existence. Severus Snape only wanted to forget, and to most onlookers, her presence and her Art had been like a dream anyway, so she slipped into oblivion.
"It was Severus Snape's presence of mind and tremendous ability for sacrifice that prevented Lord Voldemort's plans from completion. Snape took care that Idane's body was never found, by that drawing Voldemort's anger upon himself, but with very plausible arguments for his case. And the Dark Lord did listen. It cost him dearly, but Snape passed that terrible test and, at the same time, took the sting out of this attack...
"Yet, she is gone... A light less to the world..."
Harry thought he had never yet heard such passion and sadness in Dumbledore's voice.
The old wizard's next sentence, though, sounded quite his old self again.
"By the way, my dear boy, she's on one of the rarer cards in the Chocolate Frogs – here, look. And she was really, really as beautiful in that odd unusual way! Keep it, if you will – pictures of her bear a blessing of their own."
The woman on this card was not waving merrily, or grinning, or making entertaining movements, but merely smiled quietly at him, and in that smile was something that captured the heart. When she left the picture, he turned the card over. All it said was: Idane Groenbergsdottir, Artist.
"Oh, yes, thank you, Professor!"
So he could show Ron, if he hadn't got that card in his collection. Likely he had, Harry seemed to remember him saying that he was missing only one.
He did not care for collecting the things, even if they were amusing and interesting. But this one, he would keep for himself, in any case.
Dumbledore had been watching him with a distracted half-smile.
"She would have been the prize and talisman worthy of an Emperor – could have had everyone. Everyone – James, too – but she chose Severus Snape. If a choice that was."
"My father!" Harry gasped. Somehow, even seeing a young James and the other Marauders come to life again in Snape's memory had not given him the idea that his father could ever have wanted another woman than his mother.
Had Sirius ever loved? That thought was gone as fast as it came, and for the better; any thought of Sirius was too much for Harry, these days.
"Your father, yes. And he was married happily enough. Or women, like Lily or dear Minerva, for that matter... And your godfather. Or me..." Dumbledore dreamily looked up in the air for a moment.
"And... you?" Harry was utterly dumbfounded. Now that he'd heard the words, he realised that it was quite impossible for him to imagine Dumbledore, say, sitting at a breakfast table, reading the Daily Prophet, with that radiant being at his side – or any other woman, for that matter. Come to think, he had never ever considered it. Of course, for all he knew, Dumbledore could well be married and have a family, as some of the other teachers did. It just seemed so out of the picture! And with Snape, it was, too – still.
And that woman had chosen Snape of all people, over Albus Dumbledore, even if he was old, or Sirius, or his father! Harry found any of that hard to believe, regardless of the evidence he had just witnessed. Professor Snape a lover? A beloved and almost-married man? And that gorgeous creature his love? No way!
"Yes... I was much older than her, of course, if not in years, but I can pride myself that she really did enjoy my presence."
Dumbledore made a sound much like a giggle.
"Dear Severus was even jealous of me at one point! Very flattering, considering my age, and her very obvious and definite decision, and attachment to him... Well, counting mere years, I would have been quite an appropriate match for her, what with giants and their offspring growing and developing so much slower than humans, even wizards... Your Professor was not fazed by such details, at least not around her... He had, however, noticed our meetings – but never ever thought that we were plotting against Voldemort. All in all, quite flattering indeed!"
The old wizard smiled.
"And... women?"
The Headmaster appeared to ignore that question.
"She'd never ever let any fights happen. It was one of her gifts to keep rivalries of that sort at bay. For all I know she was not into women... They liked her and trusted her in all things, as did men. She was... see, she was with people much like Hagrid is with beasts..."
Harry had blushed at a part of what the Headmaster had said, but the last bit made him giggle again. How nice it would have been to know such a person!
After a pause that the old Headmaster did not seem to want to break to continue his story, Harry said, feeling awkward:
"Er... Professor... may I ask you something personal?"
"Please do, Harry!"
"Are you married at all, Professor Dumbledore?"
The old wizard blinked, seemingly returning from a bright spot in some remote past, and smiled at the boy before him.
"No. No, son, never was, never will. But her, I would've. Why?"
"Er.. I cannot really imagine you... living with a family, see? Sitting at a breakfast table in a kitchen, reading, say, the Daily Prophet…"
Dumbledore's smile bore a faint hint of sadness.
"No, Harry – neither can I. Quite aside of that paper. And I am not all that sorry about it, either. This might be hard to understand, as you long for your parents so much?"
"No... you have had to do many dangerous things... and maybe a family you loved would have made you vulnerable."
Dumbledore was a little surprised at these words. What influences had those relatives of Lily's had on the boy? He'd been close to agreeing with Minerva that his decision, 16 years ago, had not been lucky, to say the least…
"Indeed, Harry, that is cleverly perceived. Though maybe that's not all there is to it. And the concept of vulnerability was definitely not a consideration when I was young, a long time ago. It is not as if the threat of torture to anyone you do not utterly despise, to almost any living being, wouldn't do in the end; but in this way, with no family you love to be blackmailed with, you can keep... perspective more easily, and keep your head cool. Any desperation will be less personal. You do understand that, don't you?"
The old wizard cocked his head a little, looking at Harry earnestly.
Harry thought about that, then nodded. He wondered if he'd ever find someone to stay with him, himself… or if he would accept that, if he did.
"Your father was a great fighter against Lord Voldemort, but I doubt he ever got to that idea... in his life. It will sound cruel, but I think your mother might've, in her last moments... But had your parents ever considered their personal luck to be less important than their fighting aims, you would not be here... Had they done any such thing, that in itself could even be considered a victory for Voldemort... What, in the end, is all the fighting about if not the chance of that little bit of personal happiness, of love, that we all long for? Idane taught me much in that area… Yet, happiness has to be deserved, earned, and sometimes fought for... I do wish more people would give this aspect of it more room in their thought, preferably in advance... All it needs is to stop to think for a moment, and consider what could be. It doesn't have to be a war or anything that massive at all... Just that small moment of responsibility, of consideration for others, nothing more! People do die all the time, if by accident... that doesn't change by pushing the thought aside. Also, consider this: is it not better to have had that moment of bliss, of peace, of happiness, instead of forfeiting it to worry? Your Potions Professor, whatever he may be today, has at least has his. Let not ever the possibility of loss keep you from gaining happiness..."
The Headmaster sighed. After a moment, he spoke again.
"My dear boy, I do believe this has been quite a good start for the telling of this story.
"Now that we've come to an agreement, Harry, I shall see you twice a week at least, likely on irregular days. You can then tell me of your progress with Occlumency, and about Fred and George, and I shall tell you about Idane.
"For now, return to meet your friends and do your homework if you haven't already finished it... Do try and remember what you may tell them and what you may not tell them! Have a good night, Harry!"
"Good night – and thank you, sir!"
Leaving, Harry waved his rare Chocolate Frog card. Only upon descending the revolving staircase, he realised that the decisive and terrible events Dumbledore had hinted at had not yet been told as far as he could see, and the anticipation he felt about all this grew. For the time being, he felt elated and rewarded by what he'd been permitted to witness, and there was no thought of Snape or Occlumency in his mind, but only of the radiance he'd perceived. Even the knowledge that he would never see this woman or her Art in person did not dampen this happiness.
After seeing the Headmaster on an almost daily basis for weeks, Harry also felt a little bit cheated by the new arrangements. Only now, he realised how very much he had enjoyed the quiet hours in the office, with Dumbledore sometimes going about his business, Fawkes's soothing presence, and all those instruments making tiny sounds... Even if they had been devoted mainly to the purpose of convincing him to do something that he did not really care to do. Had it been due to the extensive charms the Headmaster had mentioned? He'd not been that relaxed all summer holiday... The whole place soothed him and gave him some peace, but on the other hand, Dumbledore really had been leaning in on him, and he resisted, and that bit of it had been strenuous. Now that this pressure was gone, things felt different of course.
It made sense for him to not see Harry every day... That he'd done so in order to convince him to take up lessons with Snape again, merely indicated the urgency of the matter... This had to be expected.
Harry decided not to push it, but to clarify some other questions instead, about his father and mother, for instance, while he had the chance.
And also, he'd go Snape right away the next day, and would try to ask him about Occlumency... and he'd apologise, or try to again, he thought, even if Snape didn't really like it, and Harry himself still did not feel at heart the need to.
He'd do it again if he had to… The man was such a git! But Harry knew that was not a very good reason to snoop around in his office.
Back in Gryffindor Tower, his friends greeted him with curiosity, but he pretended that nothing much had been said, and he did have some homework left to do. They did not push him, having been immersed in it themselves when he returned and, reassured by his attitude, left it at that.
Later that night, over a game of wizard chess, Harry showed Ron his card.
"Don't you think she seems nice?"
Ron owned that card of course and was not really interested, even though he had to admit that the woman seemed to be likeable enough. For once, he did not question Harry's interest in something, and he didn't know anything about her either.
Harry thought he would tell Ron and Hermione one day what Dumbledore had shown him tonight, but they were not asking now for details on what he was doing in the Headmaster's office so frequently, for which he was extremely grateful.
His friends had been worried at the beginning, but when Harry had said that Dumbledore was discussing his parents with him like the old Headmaster had suggested, they had left it at that, both reckoning that that particular subject was a private matter, much too painful to discuss, and that Harry would tell them about it when he felt ready to.
He could not possibly, that was for sure, reveal much of what he would come to know about the woman Idane's fate to anyone...