Chapter 7
Jan. 6
1:00 PM
Ick. V. Sick. Definitely should not have gone out yesterday. My little cough has turned into a full blown cold. However, unfortunately for me, I don't just get normal colds that can be cured with a dose of pepperup potion. Oh no, when I get sick, I get really sick. Woke up this morning feeling like my head, sinuses, and lungs were all going to explode. Somehow managed to pry myself out of bed and totter the near quarter of a mile to the infirmary, motivated by the prospect of some of Madame Pomfrey's magical remedies, only to be sorely disappointed. I did learn a bit more about magical medicine, though. Apparently it's not good to cure every little cold with magic, because your body doesn't get a chance to build up an immunity. So Madame Pomfrey informed me that every 4th cold a student gets, she simply sends them back to bed with a supply of tissues and chamomile tea. While this is fascinating, it's not fun to hear when you feel like you're on death's door. She walked me back to the dorm, made me some tea, and sent for a house elf to bring me some soup for lunch (I slept through breakfast). Immediately protested, seeing as I am completely against the servitude of the house elfs, but was far to exhausted to argue for long. With a few final touches on the extra blanket, Madame left me to my own devices, which are pretty much limited to me sitting here staring at my reflection in my vanity. Why the hell did I put it right across from my bed? I wonder this every time I'm sick, and still I never move it. Ah, well, humans are creatures of habit. Hmm, I've been here for nearly 2 hours and Angelina hasn't come in to see me yet. Some friend. She didn't even…
2:30 PM
Have had a revelation. Will go back to the beginning.
I dozed off while writing my last entry. Don't even remember what I was going to write, but it wasn't important. I woke up a few minutes later to find Harry sitting on the end of my bed reading my Ancient Runes book. He smiled when I woke up, immediately being replaced by a look of concern. "How are you feeling?" he asked urgently, "Are you going to be ok?"
"I'm fine (cough cough hack hack)." I proceeded to explain to him what Madame Pomfrey had told me earlier. He looked rather angry. Had to tell him to calm down and that it made perfect sense from the medical point of view. I had a simple case of sinusitis combined with a slight inflammation of the bronchial airways. Nothing to fear at all. He smiled this weird, crooked smile and said, "Hey, look, my old Hermione's back".
"What's that supposed (hack hack sniffle) to mean?" I demanded. He got a rather uncomfortable look on his face.
"It's just that, well, you haven't been the same this past week. Its like you suddenly changed into one of the dumb popular girls. I dunno, maybe I'm just imagining it. Anyway, when you were just explaining all that medical junk to me it was like I got a glimpse of normal Hermione, ya know? That's all."
Oh.
"Umm, I don't know what you're talking about, Harry. (cough hack) I mean, maybe this thing with Ginny just kinda threw ya through a loop and your head started (sniffle cough) making up all this random stuff." He got quiet. "Yeah, maybe you're right" he said in a small, rather sad voice, "anyway, you better, um, get some rest. Maybe I'll be back later if I have some time. See ya later."
And with that, he left.
I stared at my reflection for several minutes, in complete torment on what had happened. A pale, red-nosed, bushy-haired girl stared back at me. This is the first day in a week that I haven't done anything to my appearance. Yet I don't care at all. What have I done? I wanted to be like everybody else, hoping that more people would see me for who I am. But that's not who I am at all. That person, the New Hermione, was just a selfish, insecure girl who cared too much about what others thought of her. I wanted new friends, but now I've gone and alienated the only true friend I ever had. Angelina's not really my friend, she hasn't even checked on me. Well, she's a friend, but she's nothing compared to Harry. Why did I have to lie to him? Why couldn't I just have told him the truth about this whole thing, we could have had a good laugh and moved on. But no, I couldn't admit that I was that concerned about how the world saw me. I wasn't able to admit that I was wrong. But maybe there's hope. Maybe I can still make things right. I gathered my strength and clamored out of bed. Teetering over to the vanity, I swept all of the beauty confections atop it off into an old canvas bag lying nearby. I put all the appliances, jars, tubes, brushes, and other various items into the bag. I didn't stop until the entire vanity was completely bare, back to the way it used to be. I heaved the bag (as it was quite heavy) over to the door to return to Angelina as soon as possible. Finally, I sank back down in bed, totally exhausted but feeling lighter, cleansed. The New Hermione was banished, and now it was just me. Now all I can hope is that I can make Harry understand the same thing.