The Trilogies of And Ya
Chapter 2: Newbies and a death...Sooo early on, too.
Yo! Strangely enough, as I write this, I haven't even posted the first chapter! Talk about lazy! But, I'm not that lazy. I mean, check out how many stories I've posted! If you wonder why I stick mostly to one-shots, its because I have a really short attention-span and I get bored very quickly. I've also got an overly active imagination, so whenever I start writing a story with a few chapters, I get hit with an idea like I would get hit by a transport truck, so I abandon the one idea, and start writing the new one, hence the reason for my numerous one-shots. Most kids my age have NO active imagination. I found this out when I listen to my classmates' so-called "creative" writing. Well, save about 3, and myself. My friends Mortal Kombat (Go read her stories, RIGHT NOW!), lovelovesugar1994 (Doesn't post much, but she can write.), and Vall (Hasn't got a file on or fictionpress, but still writes some pretty funny stuff anyways.)
Oh yeah, and I don't own anything except myself.
(Kady's POV)
I woke up to get breakfast, and Horo was up, too.
"C'mon, there's lots of eggs in the forest," I told Horo. "We need 19 eggs. Should be easy."
We got the eggs, (Miraculously quickly, too...) and Horo went back to sleep. I finished cooking. I threw water on everyone, and they pissed-off-ed-ly ate their food. Naruto looked at his food, then Horo's food, then his food, then Horo's food, then his food again. "Hey! Horo's got 3 eggs and we've all got 2! What's up with that!"
"Because, Horo was the only one who bothered to get up and come with me to get food. 'Cause you're all lazy." I replied calmly.
This sparked one of the most entertaining arguments I've ever taken part in. Naruto and I continued arguing about the eggs, when there was a rustle in the bushes, and two screaming girls dashed out. One had blonde hair and the other had brown hair. They seem farmiliar to me. I know who they are, but shallst not reveal them for the sake of cliffies. Nothing better than a bit of good ol' homemade suspense! Ya know, just like Ma used to make! Anyhow, the blonde carried a giant paintbrush on her back as well as a packed-looking backpack. She wore the Konoha ninja headband, as well as the appropriate shuriken pack strapped to her right knee and a few kunai bags on her belt. She wore navy blue knee-length shorts, and a white tank-top over a mesh t-shirt. Her hair is down to her shoulders and its a dark-blonde-ish colour. The brown-haired girl's hair was about the same length as the blonde's and she wears a pair of black pants and a black t-shirt that reads "Drop the Chocolate and no-one gets hurt.". She wears a Konoha village headband around her waist and she's got the same bags on her belt and her knee as well. She carries a bo-staff and a backpack full of nets, ropes, and cloth sacks. You could tell that traps were her specialty. She also wore these Elton John style rose sunglasses.
"Oh my god! It's Naruto! AHHHHHH! Naruto!"
And the blonde tackled him.
"Naruto! I'm your biggest fan!" she screamed, pulling out a pair of tweezers and a tiny Ziploc bag. She plucked a golden strand of hair from Naruto's head and put it in the bag "There! A souvenier from this encounter! Fa la! You are sooooo cool!"
Then she walked back up to Sasuke and kicked him in the balls. She got some of his hair while he was rolling around on the ground, clutching his injured groin. (A/N: Yay! Hooray for OOC!) "Ahh! It hurts!" he cried OOCishly.
"Why did you hurt Sasuke?" Sakura asked. "You must've kicked him pretty hard...He usually doesn't show his pain. Esecially not like this..." She watched Sasuke roll some more as he bagan to cry uncontrolably.
"Yep! He's the King of the "Mr. I've-Got-A-Stick-Up-My-Ass-So-I'm-An-Unfeeling-Cruel-Cold-Heart-Gay-Bastard" image!" Naruto said cheefully.
Sakura glared.
The other girl began to poke Sasuke with a with her bo-staff, chuckling wickedly.
Then the blonde walked up behind Sakura and plucked a hair from her head.
"Oww..." Sakura whined, but looking at Sasuke, she decided not to whine because her injury is nothing compared to that of Sasuke.
"We're Naruto's greatest fans!" the blonde one exclaimed.
"I know that I'm great, and all," Naruto began, a little overly proud.
"You wish." Sasuke growled, now back on his feet.
"But why do I have fans? I haven't done anything good for you guys..."
"You don't have the right to complain, Naruto. You always said you wanted someone to pay attention to you, and now you do. Plus, they're girls. Need I say more?" Kakashi droned.
The two blushed.
"Actually," The brown haired one objected. "First of all, I'm Vall, and I'm looking for a guy named Inu Yasha. Long, white hair, crazy-long sideburns, huge-ass sword, doggy ears, you seen him?"
"Nope."
"Then my quest shall continue!" she exclaimed, and ran off into the woods, in search of Inu Yasha, the dog demon.
"Oh yeah, I haven't introduced myself. My name is Shawna Schwenzer," She said with a bow. "And I'm Naruto's greatest fan! Fa la la!"
"Hi, Shawny." I gave her a thumbs-up "Long time, no see, eh? I guess you know Naruto and Sasuke, but shall you obssess over Kakashi today?"
"That reminds me," she began. "I need hair from you still," She advanced on him, holding out the tweezers.
He disappeared, away from Shawna. "Don't touch the hair." He said cooly, running his fingers through his hair.
Vall walked out of the woods at that time. "You guys sure you didn't see hi-" Vall stared at Kakashi's hair, which he was proceeding to comb back with his fingers.
"Gray hair..." she muttered, taking zombie-like steps towards Kakashi. "John Smith...Gray hair..."(A/N: Don't mind the Canadian spelling. I'm very proud of my heritage.)
"Uh-oh...Gray hair attack..." Shawna muttered, and put a mesh sack (AKA: A net.) over Vall's head and pulled it shut once Vall was inside. "Vall has this thing with gray hair. She used to hang out with this guy named John Smith and he had gray hair. He suddenly went bastard on Vall and now she enjoys shaving gray hair. Its like an impulse for her. Kakashi and Inu Yasha are both in the danger zone."
Kakashi clutched his hair in horror. He was quite proud of his hair. When I say "quite" I mean QUITE proud.
"Now I have to free her." Shawna opened the net. "So watch your back."
Vall crawled out of the net slowly and calmly. She looked around, and her gaze rested on Horo. "Gray har..." she mumbled.
"Wha...? But...I've got blue hair!"
"She thinks you hair is gray for some unknown reason!" Shawna explained. "She'll shave your hair at all costs!"
"Why? I don't have gray hair!" He yelled. "Its freakin' blue! Get it through that concrete skull of yours, Vall!"
"There. My collection is complete." Shawna said as she pulled a strand of Kakashi's silver hair. "Fa la. Oh, and by the way, Naruto. I've got a huge crush on you!"
"W-What?' Naruto asked, startled.
Shawna changed the subject. "Hey Naruto, can I have the honour of shaking your hand?"
"Okay..." Naruto said hesitantly, reaching out.
"But first!" she exclaimed, looking around. "Kakashi, could you please take a good picture of him shaking my hand?"
"Why?"
"So that I can have a beautiful picture to show the world!" She replied matter-of-factly.
"Okay..." Kakashi said slowly.
With a snap, the moment was photographed.
"Oh. My. God. I'll never wash this hand again!" Shawna exclaimed, hugging her hearthrob in all joy. "Anyhow," she regained her composure. "Yay! I've got a beautiful picture! Fa la!" (A/N: At the time I wrote this, the real Shawny had an obssesseion with saying "Fa la". Now you know.)"Can I have one more picture with you, Naruto?"
"Okay..." He answered.
In the next shot, she kissed Naruto on the cheek. His face went red. Shawny saw his dazed look and asked, "What's the matter?"
"Its just that this is the first time a girl has actually kissed me..." (A/N: Not counting Tsunade. I wouldn't consider her a girl anyways. She has her own species. Its called "hag".)
"Then could I have the honour of being your first girlfriend?" Shawna asked.
"Sure."
Shawna stayed in the village to train, secretly be with her Naruto-"kun", and to show the world her artwork.
During this "photo shoot" time, Vall had dashed off into the bush in search of her target. She was now dragging a thrashing sack out of the woods triumphantly. "I caught Inu Yasha!" She yelled, doing a victory dance. "I'm Vall and I caught Inu Yasha! I am an anime kidnapper! Uh-huh! Oh yeah!" Then she tripped. "Nooooooooo!" She howled as Inu Yasha jumped out and ran away. "Got you!" she yelled as she sacked "Inu Yasha".
"Let me go!" The voice in the sack called. This voice was waaay too high-pitched to be Inu Yasha...
"NEVER!"
"You don't understand! I'm not Inu Yasha! He ran up a tree! I wanted to tweak his ears! I'm Naruto!" So she freed him in he glared at her. "How did you DARE to confuse me for Inu yasha! Do I look like a freakin' dog demon to you!"
But, alas, he was ignored. Vall and Shawna then ran up a tree to catch Inu Yasha.
"Hey! You two must be ninjas! Only ninjas can run up trees!" Naruto exclaimed.
"DUH! Of course we're ninjas! What did you think we were! Why do you think we came here, anyways! We're here to train and hang with Kady-sensei!" They said together as Inu Yasha jumped down and so did they. They came down on top of him with the sack stretched out between them like a net and, once again, they trapped Inu Yasha.
"Hello Vall." mumbled a voice from above.
"Whuh?" Vall looked up. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH! ITS GAAAAARRRAAAA!"
We all looked up and there he was, hanging from a branch by his feet, Gaara of the Desert!
"OWW!" he yelled, covering his ears from Vall's shrill scream.
He fell.
Since Vall jumped out of the way, he landed on the sack that held Inu Yasha and was knocked unconcious. Vall put Inu Yasha and Gaara in cages. Shawna got a hair sample from the two of them, and received a narsty cut from Inu Yasha from when she stuck her hand in his cage.
"Now that you guys have Inu Yasha and Gaara in cages, could you let me proceed with the training program?" I asked. "Gaara, did you come here for the training?"
"Yes." He replied simply, lying his brains out.
"Then we hafta free him." I advised casually.
"Fine!" Vall said, and pouted in the corner that appeared outta nowhere because I said so. Gaara was also freed because I said so. Convenient, ne?
"Do you guys want to go swimming before your backbreaking training begins?" I asked, lowering my voice wickedly on the phrase "backbreaking training".
"Backbreaking training!" Naruto whined. "But I'm allergic to work!"
"Great! Than you can go first in the training!"
"Awww man! What is training anyways!" he complained sourly.
"I'm gonna freeze the river and leave a hole in the ice. You're gonna sit in the water for 3 hours to clear your mind. You're gonna be neck deep!" I explained. "Kapeeche? Kapeeche."
Then Yoshi came out of his Yoshi hatchery for the first time in god knows how long, and Sasuke took a spaz.
"What the hell is that thing!" Sasuke asked. "Its dangerous."
"Yoshi!"
"AHHH! Its the thing's battle cry!" he cried. "Must. Stab. Must. Kill."
"Yoshi!"
"It looks somewhat like my brother! I must kill it!" (A/N: Is Sasuke claiming that Itachi-san looks like a Yoshi! I'll kill him!)
"Yosh--Wragh!..." It coughed as Sasuke stabbed it in the stomach with a kunai. With a final cough, it exploded and blood flew everywhere.
"Sasuke, he wasn't evil, he was a Yoshi. I think you're a little paranoid..." I began thoughtfully. "But, hey. No-one cares about Yoshi anyways!"
Later we all played full-contact soccer to kill time. Shawny was a very participant player! She tried to kick the ball but nailed Sasuke instead. In the balls. This happen three times. Vall's foot connected to Gaara at least seventeen times.
TBC...
Hey! Funnier chapter. But its definately not the funniest chapter in this story. Alright! Two chapters down, one hundred and four to go:9
On another note, the pairings in this story go VallXGaara, only cause, at the time I wrote this, Vall had a severe case of Gaaraphobia. He was deathly afraid of him. Now she just hates him. We used to prank her by sending her e-mails with Gaara on it and shit, but she's gotten over the e-mails. She's no fun anymore. :(
Another pairing is the infamous ShawnaXNaruto or ShawnaXSasuke. Shawna no longer has a crush on Sasuke, but she used to.
And last and least is KadyXHorohoro. Yes, this isn't obvious yet, but it WILL happen, and nothing shall stop it!
Review and you shall be rewarded with uber-cute Naruto plushies! And cookies with little Konoha leaf marks, Uchiha symbols, Oto sound marks, and little nine-tailed Kyuubis! Yay:Throws cookies to readers:
Reader 1: Wow! I got a Kyuubi, cool!
Reader 2: Not as cool as me! I got the Uchiha symbol:Holds up cookie victoriously:
Reader 3: No way! I got the Oto symbol! YAY!
Reader 4: Well I got a Konoha leaf mark!
Me: Yah, well I'm the writer so I beat you all!
Heheheheheh...I like having fans...
Chow!
uchihachik/
PS: The next chapter's called "New training, New enemies."!