Saint H's Vainglorious and Very Very British Author's Notes:

'Ello old bean. I say what a fancy day to eat a crumpet! (Drops pathetic attempt at writing in English) Ok, that was weird, sorry and British people out there, I know you don't really talk like that, or do you? Anyway, newest chapter of Closet Jocks! here. Also, watch me as I shamelessly plug my newest story Interlude which you should go read. Reasons being because I just told you to and because you know you would even if I didn't tell you (tch, yea right(hey, you shut up!(C'mon, you know H's stories suck(Do not!(Do too!(Do not!(Do too!)))))). So, now time for Review Responses.

Raidersrule76 Oh man, those idea are hilarious, and I am soooo going to use the Brit Porn idea, but not in this fic. In Babe Magnets (isn't up yet) Ya see, I could have it up, but I'm going to wait until It aint easy is done, so I don't have four active fics on my hands.

Lady of Faerie Evil evil evil, drama drama drama, evil evil evil drama drama drama. Thanks bunches for the review!

Terra Logan Good point, it was just bound to happen.

Triforce90 Yea, I really thought I could take the whole DICK thing to the next level with that gag.

Darthjag Cool.

MeteoraGirl27 Well after a while I just get used to typing DICK, in fact now I can't type DICK any other way. Beware the force of habit!

Disclaimer: H owns a Penis Pump! D

Dude, no I don't. Damn Disclaimer, you're a waste of html!

Disclaimer: Am not!

Chapter Four: Tycher's Lynge

Mr. Slade Wilson, the Principle of the school, walked into the Teacher's Lounge during lunch period with his lonely eye scanning the room.

"Hey everyone, half of the day down, another half to go huh?" He inquired.

"Damn, I wanna get in the janitor's closet with half of those little freshmen Ho's!"

"Dammit eye I told you to shut up!" Slade yelled up to his lonely eye.

"That chum's tinker isn't worth it's crackers in fish, aye?" Mad Mod whispered to the person next to him on the couch.

"That isn't even real British slang you idiot." David Banner said to the Austin Powers look alike.

"Hey bub, I was created before that Powers chap, so you can cornhole a toad in a hole, sound as a pound, crumpets!" Mad Mod yelled up at the narrator.

"Your improper and stereotypical use of British slang is making me angry, you wouldn't like me when I'm angry…" David Banner said, holding his head as if in pain.

"….." Mad Mod stared at the fellow, of course, being British he had no idea who David Banner was, "…. Crumpets?"

"RAUUURGHAA!" David Banner said, turning green and ripping all of his clothes, besides his pants of course, becoming the Incredible Hulk!

"Hulk smash!" the Hulk said chasing after Mad Mod.

"Crikey!" Mad Mod said running for his life.

Princey Wilson, his eye, and the rest of the teachers just sat there for a moment.

"So, Mr. Blood what did you do today?"

"Oooh Vic, I love you Vic! Please stay after class! Oh Victor, VICTOR!" Mr. Blood(without all the metal and techno shyt) moaned as he stared at his picture of said student.

"You do know he's straight, not gay, right Blood?" asked Mrs. Harpert.

The manically gay teacher's bloodshot eye stared murderously at his fellow teacher, "What… do you mean… not gay?"

"Well, I thought it too for the longest time, but then the other day in class."

FLASHBACK!

"Alright Kory, my two pair beats your Royal Flush." DICK said, trying to keep a straight face.

Everyone watched intently, watching to see if the foreign exchange student would fall for it.

"Oh fooey, I guess that means I lose." Kory said before, almost too willingly, taking off her final piece of clothing.

DICK and the rest of the guys stared and drooled incoherently at the site. Just then Gar (only in his monkey boxers) looked over to the side and said, "Baran, Atlas, why are you looking at me, look at her!"

END FLASHBACK!

Everyone stared at Mrs. Harpert.

"Damn, I want to be in her class sometime."

"Eye I told you to shut the God Blessed Fluck up!" Princey Wilson said taking a gun to his ocular oppressor.

BANG!

After a few moments of awkward silence Mr. Blood spoke up again, "So, what the hell does that have to do with anything? My Vicy Wicy and his sweet black ass could still be gay!" the old man raged.

"No, don't you see, only Baran and Atlas are gay, Victor was drooling over Kory Ander's naked flesh just like me, err…. I mean just like the rest of the boys. Victor isn't gay, just effeminate!" the old woman argued.

"Y-you can't prove it!" Blood stormed.

"No, but I can!" A shadowy figure in the corner of the teacher's lounge said.

"Who are you?" Blood asked, squinting at the figure.

The shadowy figure stood up and stepped into the light to reveal…

"It's me, Piccolo!" he shouted Dragonball Z style.

"AH!" all the other teacher's screamed before hitting the deck.

"Oh, sorry everyone, I'm still getting used to not being in mortal danger every waking moment."

Murmur's of 'its alright' were heard from multiple people as everyone got up off the floor.

"Anyway, I have proof that Victor Stone is completely straight." Piccolo said starting another flashback.

FLASHBACK Z!

"W-why are you touching me there Mr. Piccolo?"

"Quite crying Gohan! This is-this is part of your training! Yea, that's it!"

END OF DISTURBING FLASHBACK Z!

All the teacher's just stared at the Namek.

"Oh, ahem, sorry everybody, wrong flashback. Let's try that again."

RIGHT FLASHBACK!

"Alright class, I've your test results, and I've got to say for the most part I'm impress-"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" a random and quite attractive girl in a skirt screamed before.

Plop!

"Waaaah!" a baby lie crying on the floor.

"Uhhh…" Piccolo said in confusion.

The student's just stared, their mouths open.

"Vic, it's our son!" the girl said excitedly while picking up the baby.

"A-are you sure it's mine? Because I'm pretty sure it isn't." Vic said trying to look innocent.

"Boo ya!" The baby cooed.

END RIGHT FLASHBACK!

"And right after that Victor started acting effeminate and gay-like in order to make everyone think the baby wasn't his." Piccolo deduced.

"Oooooh!" everyone else said as it all started to make sense, "It's all starting to make sense."

Blood just cried as his dreams were shattered in an instant.

Piccolo went up and licked the tears off Blood's face, "Ah yes! Your misery is delicious, Mwuahahahahaha!" Piccolo laughed with absolute evility.

"Dude that's so cruel!"

"DAMMIT EYE! I THOUGHT I SHOT YOU! WHAT DO I HAVE TO DO TO GET RID OF YOU?"

"I dunno, it'd probably take something drastic like scraping me out of your skull with a hot cattle prod. No, No WAIT!"

Saint H's End of the Chapter Author's Notes:

Well, that's the end of Chapter Four! Hope you had a good time. Before I wrap this up some of the character's would like to have a few words.

DICK: Hey everybody, we've had some laughs tonight, and some boners when we saw Kory naked,

Gar: But there's one thing that isn't funny or sexy,

Kory: Teenage pregnancy.

Raven: Please, use protection, and if you're a guy and you do get a girl pregnant, please, have some balls and take care of you're child.

Vic: After all, it's the right thing to do. Good night folks!

The five wave good night.

Saint H: REVIEW BYZOTCHAZ!