CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Date: February 13, 2005
Day: Sunday
Dear Journal,
I've never felt so depressed in my life.
I just can't understand how she could... Why she would...
Ok, let me start at the beginning. Last night, I thought about what had happened yesterday, and I came up with another plan. So this morning, I went to this florist and got some roses for Ste...for her. I can't even write her name right now. Anyway, I got some roses for her because I know how much she loves them. Then I got her this teddy bear, because I had this feeling that she would like that, too. I wrote her this poem, and... This is the worst part... I actually went to the most expensive jewelry place in this city and bought her a ring. It was supposed to be a promise ring, almost like we would be engaged to be engaged, if that makes any sense. Because last night, I realized that I want it all with her, a lifetime with her. I want the marriage. I want the kids. I want the arguments. I want to make up after the arguments...
But after today, I don't think any of that will be possible.
After I went and bought all that stuff, I called ahead to the next city to make reservations at one of the most romantic restaurants there. See, last night, I researched restaurants for that city online, and the restaurant that I called had five stars and really positive customer reviews. I made the reservations, then headed straight for the arena, because I knew that was where Ste...she...would be. She's a hard-working woman. She works faithfully for her father every day of the week, and she doesn't complain about it. I was smiling all big, just grinning. I had the roses in one hand, the teddy bear in the other hand...
I felt like I was the luckiest man alive.
I ran into John Cena on the way, and I actually apologized for the way I had acted yesterday at the meeting. That was a moment in history. The King of the World never apologizes. That's a known fact! John accepted my apology, and he told me that he and Ste... Well, that they were just friends. He was like, "She loves you, you know that right?" And I was like, "I love her, too, and I plan on telling her right now." He actually gave me his blessing, and then he said, "Love doesn't just wait around... Don't let her slip away." It was such a great feeling to have someone on my side in this...
I thought about knocking when I got to her office, but then I figured, "Why not surprise her?"
I wish I would've knocked.
What I saw really... It sucks. It hurts me to think about it, and let me just point out that I'm not easily hurt. But the image of her...kissing him... That hurts. I just gaped at them for a minute. He was grinning at me, like the whole situation was just a big laugh to him. And then he said the words that I dreaded: "We're getting back together." I couldn't believe it. I mean, Hunter is a known liar. But I figured it had to be true, considering the way I had just found them in each other's arms when I walked in...
When I left, Ste...she...followed me, tried to explain herself. God, when she touched me, I wanted to die. It hurts so much to think that she's back with him... She told me that she wasn't, but I don't trust that. After what happened with Trish, I said I would never trust another woman again. But no, I had to go and trust Ste...her... And look where it got me. Heartbroken once again.
Damn that Hunter! First he married Ste...her...before I even had a chance. Then, when I was dating Trish, he stole her from me... And now, just when I thought Ste...she...was mine, he came back and stole her from me, too. I hate him more than I've ever hated anyone before. That stupid son of a bitch, I just want to hurt him for this!
Ste...she...has left me so many voice mails that my inbox is full. I'm not calling her back. I haven't listened to any of her messages either, because I think that if I hear her voice, I'm going to cry... God, I'm a wimp.
I canceled the reservations.
Looks like I'll be spending my Valentine's Day alone... Yep, just me and this ring...
More Next Time,
Chris
P.S. I can't believe I cried in front of her. I am such a pathetic assclown...