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Chapter Thirty-Three
A Rain of Change
Odine sat on an old stool in the far corner of his lab, puzzled. Everything he had gone through, the experiments, research, and evidence was telling him something, and he couldn't understand. But he knew one thing: Whatever it was, it was more than he expected.
What was happening? He wondered, rolling that same question over and over in his mind. Something was going on, obviously, but he wasn't sure what. Could this sorceress, this child, really be this powerful? Was there a connection that he had missed somewhere? Could there be a missing piece to this puzzle where all the pieces just showed up out of nowhere? And what of his Dr. Evil experiments? The fusion? There has to be answers there, hidden behind the changes of the DNAs. He had done the impossible with the help of a power that knew no boundaries. Was it the magic or the hatred? Which was greater? And why was there so much worry about the mountains? Was there something that lie beneath a thousand tons of rock? What was the secret? Where were the answers? Where was the rest of the puzzle? How many more surprises were there to be found?
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"Umm, about back there, thank you," Seifer struggled to tell Squall when they had exited Laguna's quarters. "I don't want to be the one that tells them. I'm not on exactly the best terms with them." Squall nodded and rolled his eyes.
They walked silently to their sleeping quarters that Laguna had set up for them. Seifer followed but still had that feeling that he wasn't welcome. He hadn't been much of help to them when they were tracking Ultimecia two years ago.
"Dude, you gonna stand there or are you going to get to bed?" Zell asked with a stupid look towards Seifer. He nodded and got into one of the empty beds, grateful to be able to lie down. Zell, Irvine, Selphie, and Quistis slept in the middle of the large room while Seifer was the one closest to the door and while Squall and Rinoa were in the far back, away from everyone. Squall was the one who liked to be alone and away from everyone, but Rinoa joined him and was the only one whom he allowed to invade his solitude.
That night the wind howled and the rain beat hard against the windows. This was one of the worst storms Esthar has ever seen in a long time. Squall lay there wide-awake, bothered by the noise. He wasn't bothered by the noise of the storm, but the noise in his head that kept him from sleeping. He had to keep glancing at Rinoa's sleeping, peaceful form just to make sure that she was still there. He knew that Seifer wouldn't harm her or any of them. He had given Squall his word, and Seifer would take his word to the grave.
But still there was that little feeling that just continued to grow and wouldn't go away. How long would it be before one of them did something to cause Seifer to snap the same way he did two years ago? Seifer had been known to lose it. He had been Ultimecia's little puppet two years ago. He turned away from where he grew up; from everything he knew and went off to help her. He lost it. He lost it all. Even his best friends, Fujin and Rajin admitted hat he wasn't the same person they had known for so long. He had considered himself Ultimecia's knight, had devoted himself to her, but Ultimecia just dropped him like a sack of potatoes. She had only used him to carry out her plans, and then, when she didn't need him any longer, left him for SeeD to kill off. They didn't kill him, though. They just banned him.
Squall couldn't take it any longer. He got up and left the room. Not only was this puzzling, but it was bothering him to where he just couldn't handle it. He left the room but had no idea where to go. His only thought was to get away from that room, away from the people, the noise, the pain.
He walked to the balcony he had found last time he was here. It was hidden away and old. The room that led to it was small and dusty but probably once elegant. Now it only showed its wear. Tattered curtains covered the exit to the balcony. He walked, slow step by slow step out onto the cracked stone. He didn't mind the wind or rain now. He didn't care how it drove into his skin with the pain of a thousand needles. He felt nothing right now. Sometimes he had those moments where he just had no real feel of anything. It was almost like part of him was invincible, but he only felt that way when he had lost himself, his conscious self, in his own thoughts, and nothing could beat that feeling. He craved it, loved it. He closed his eyes and tried to ignore the voice within. The one that always was doubtful and brought up things that were better to be left alone. It was the one that made him so bitter and lonely. The same one that built the wall that Rinoa brought crumbling down in a dusty heap.
Squall shook himself out of his thoughts. He didn't need this right now. Whoever said that thinking too much wasn't a bad thing, was really an absolute moron because it always seems to get me into trouble. He thought to himself bitterly. Those were the old habits that needed to be broken: talking to myself and thinking too much.
Squall couldn't stop the corners or his mouth that had began to rise in a small smile. Rinoa had certainly brought about a change in him. Smiling was just something he didn't do before she came along, that and laughing. He couldn't remember the last time he laughed before she prodded it out of him. Before he had met Rinoa and her carefree, high-spirited attitude, if someone had told him that he was a cold, lonely, unhappy, uncaring, mean, and ornery individual he would have (if he said anything at all besides "whatever") told them that was perfectly all right with him to be that way.
When he thought about it, all of his life had been unhappy. It started with his mother dying shortly after he was born, and his father didn't even know that he existed. To make matters worse, the only person who he had ever been close to him had left him. He stayed at the orphanage with Matron until he was about five, and then he had gone to Balamb. He never had very much luck with families. They always tried to make him someone he wasn't and would never be. Half of the kids in the orphanage that didn't get adopted were sent to one of the three Gardens.
Squall had kept his distance from everyone from day one. He vowed that he would never be hurt again. He told himself that he would rather be alone than hurt again. He couldn't endure that sort of pain more than once. But somewhere along the lines he'd forgotten about that. Of course, when he Zell, and Selphie had been dispatched in Timber to help the Forest Owls, he hadn't been prepared for what would happen, what would change. Rinoa Heartilly had turned every bit of his orderly, well-prepared world upside-down, and he began to like it. He began to like what she did to him, how she made him feel.
For the second time that night he had to shake himself out of his thoughts. The rain had suddenly grown heavier, and he couldn't help but look up into the bleak night sky. He saw that with every flash of lightening, he could see the black clouds that hid the stars from him. But he found beauty in those night clouds. He saw they, too, had color to them. Colors like dark purple and velvet blue that swirled around together and moved where the wind pushed them in perfect harmony.
He had never really felt this way before. He liked how it felt, how it made him heal. And Rinoa was the one to give all the credit to. She did this to him, but he had no remorse. He had so much to thank her for. Without her, he would most likely be dead by now. He probably would have killed himself, as he got more and more sick of life.
He remembered how she had cast that first spell on him in Balamb at the ball, but he had another feeling that she had cast a stronger one when they met again that really had a hold on him. And that spell was still lasting. It would last for eternity, an eternity that he was looking forward to.
Every drop now that hit him was like a thousand tiny knives, but he didn't care and had no desire to move. He was quite content where he was standing, no matter how much it hurt.
Unexpectedly, a hand was placed upon his shoulder. He jumped slightly and turned around to face his invader. Rinoa was standing there, almost as drenched as he was.
"What are you doing out here?" He regretted that his words came out as cold as they did. He hadn't meant to say it that way to her, but he was a little upset that his solitude had been interrupted. On the brighter side, it could have been someone else.
Rinoa titled her head in that cute way that she usually does when she asks something or finds something amusing but manages to refrain from laughing. "What do you mean? That's exactly what I was wondering," she replied. He heard how scratchy she sounded and suddenly became a bit worried that she might get sick, but unfortunately his curiosity got the better of him, and what came out of his mouth isn't exactly what he meant to say.
"How did you find me here?" he questioned, wondering if she could find him no matter how far away he was. No, that couldn't be possible. There had to be another reason.
"I wasn't asleep, you know. No, I don't have some sort of crazy sixth sense of where you are at all times. At least none that I know of." She suppressed a tiny giggle that made him raise an eyebrow. He was actually glad that she didn't have that "sixth sense."
"Maybe I should check properly whether or not you're conscious next time, huh?" He whispered. She only nodded. He found it a little difficult to see her clearly. The lightening wasn't as frequent as before and certainly not as bright. When he could see her, she was beautiful. He had to wonder if there was a time when she didn't look beautiful to him. She stood there, her black hair against her shoulders. Every drop of rain that fell on her face stood out like diamonds that brought more beauty to her features if that was possible. Drops resonated on her eyelashes, making her almost irresistible to him.
"What?" Again the thing with her head. He loved that about her. Every little thing about her he loved and cherished. Nothing in the world could make him love another. He wouldn't have it. He'd sooner end what he had than force himself to find love in someone else. He couldn't help it. He was obsessed.
He shook his head and found enough courage to move a strand of hair behind her ear. His fingers brushed lightly against her cheek and she closed her eyes, momentarily stunned by his touch. He was always afraid to touch her. Sometimes, though, he'd have those moments, those blackouts where he didn't want or need anything but the feel of her. At those times he would forget that he had a shy spot in him and allow his guard to be let down.
She reached for his hand as it dropped to his side again. She wouldn't lose that touch, not yet. She needed him to break down and let it all go for once. Those little moments she needed in a large quantity right now. She moved his hands around her waist and pulled him closer to her until their bodies touched. He tensed, but she refused to allow him to move away from her. Laying her head against his chest. She could hear and feel every heart beat, every breath, and every other little movement and sound in his body. It calmed her, made her feel tranquil and happy. He did that to her.
He did a brave thing and pulled her out of the rain, into the tiny, worn room. Sitting down he pulled her closer to him. She got comfortable in his lap, keeping her head against his chest, and the two of them watched he rain.
A/N: I'm still working to get things updated as fast as I can. Please, bear with me. I'm having technical difficulties with my brain. Later Days y'all!