Disclaimer- Blah blah, own nobody, blah -sob- On with the story!

What are you going to do?

A blonde man sat in a chair beside a small hospital bed, which held upon it a beautiful male, a male who had slipped his way down through two hells and was now trapped in despair. To any outsider, it would look like just a bad case of abuse and neglect to a handsome young man, who was being comforted by a friend or family member. But that wasn't the case; even if it wasn't that far off the mark.

The pale man in the hospital gurney appeared to be asleep, but he wasn't. He was alert, aware, but starving. Not that he'd ever say anything to the other guy about it; it was his own fault any way. With a slight grunt, Seifer awakens from his uncomfortable slumber. Sighing and stretching, he stands and pops his back before looking over the brunette and glancing up at the doctor who had come on sight of stirring.

"You really need to make these chairs more comfy, doc. They're a real pain to sleep on."

"That's the point Seifer, it is supposed to stop you sleeping on them."

The woman receives only a grunt in response, and she bustles around in a way only maids and doctors could. Checking Squall over, she clicks her tongue in annoyance and replace the IV tube into his arm, muttering "fool" at the 'unconscious' brunette.

Seifer shakes his head, sitting back down in the painful chair. "Is he awake?"

"Yes I do believe he is."

Squall makes no movement, but he was looking worse than ever; his chest was moving only a tiny amount with each limited breath he drew in.

"Good." He says quietly, leaning forwards.

"Oh, Squall. The new drugs will be arriving tomorrow for your sleeping. You will have to try and stay awake until then, because there are no more left." There is no reaction from Squall, but there was one from Seifer.

"He can't sleep until tomorrow! How is he supposed to stay awake for that long!"

"Believe me Seifer, he has been staying up for more than just days." The doctor sighs, leaving the room to answer her phone, which was beeping maniacally.

The male in question was limp on the bed, his muscles unusually tense. He doubted he would be able to stay awake for that long, he just didn't have the energy. Probably because he wasn't eating or doing anything to help himself. The only reason he hadn't tried to kill himself so determinedly was because he had not slept, or had taken enough pills to dull whatever haunted him.

"Squall? Are you alright?" The blonde asks, concerned. Shaking his head, he mutters to himself. "Stupid question, of course you're not." With a sigh, Seifer moves the chair nearer to the failing brunette. "Will you tell me about time compression?" He asks, merely testing the waters; already knowing that Squall would never tell.

As expected, the male in the bed doesn't move, or reply.

He was curious to know what had become of Rinoa, having left before the final battle, and certainly not there for all the time that Squall was, he didn't know what had happened to the woman he was presumed to have loved. "Do you know what happened to Ultimecia's and the others?" He asks, frowning at the flinch the sorceress' name provokes.

"Did you flinch? You did, didn't you? Since when did you flinch?" Seifer is incredulous, disbelieving.

"Since I died inside." He mutters, the first response so far. The response far from pleasing to the blonde's ears. But Squall didn't care anymore. And by tonight, he'd by begging for death, unable to feel anything but pain as the nightmares flood his waking. It had happened before, and there was nothing he could do to stop it. Squall was falling apart at the seams.

Concerned but unaware, Seifer watches, reading Squall. He notes the slightly inset eyes, although the lids were closed, and the bony shoulders visible. They were too scarred for his liking, he hadn't been so bad before the war. A bit battered sometimes, but cures erased wounds before they could scar. He obviously hadn't had any sort of cure during his time in 'hell.' As angry as it made Seifer, it wouldn't help it if he blew his top. It wouldn't change anything, and it wouldn't make things better.

"You aren't dead inside Squall. You're still there. Okay? You can't be dead inside…" There was something unexplainable in Seifer's voice, almost like pleading, but different.

"…" Silence from the brunette, he merely sighs almost inaudibly.

"Is there nothing I can do to help you?" Seifer asks quietly.

"Since when did you want to help me." Squall replies flatly, his lips barely moving. "Why do you stay, and why did you come back? You were dead."

It hurt to feel the emptiness in Squall's tone, and he could feel the pain at those last words. You were dead. As if Seifer had abandoned him too. Seifer shakes his head, resting his head in his hands. It was true. He had left Squall, and it had aided in the break down of Leonhart, he deserted Squall when he shouldn't have.

"…I'm sorry, Squall." He says quietly, shaking his head. "I'm so sorry."

A tiny, bitter smile adds to the broken ensemble the brunette made, and Seifer bites his lip to keep control.

Squall's soul had been twisted and desecrated, and it was almost too much to bear. While he had been getting away scot free compared to Squall, the saviour was forced to suffer.

There is a brief moment where there is no more talking, no movement or anything. Seifer simply sat in the chair, Squall lying in the bed. Several minutes go by like this, until Seifer once more breaks the silence.

"Will you let me see your scars?" He asks quietly, although he doubted that the brunette on the bed would comply to his wishes. Not now anyway.

As expected, the man on the bed stays silent, although his body visibly tenses beneath the sheets. Seifer places a hand on Squall's arm, causing it to tense further.

"Enough of that Squall. Don't keep tensing like that. You're muscles are too sore. You're supposed to be resting, getting better, but you won't do either. If you want me to get you out of here, you need to show signs of improvement. I can't just kidnap you." He says quietly.

"Death is my only escape." He replies quietly.

"Bullshit. I can help you. Why won't you at least let me try!"

"Because it hurts." He says quickly, a flare of anger in his eyes and voice. "Because each waking minute is hell, and bottomless pit where I'm falling and no one can stop me. It only stops when I die, and you…people just keep making that fall longer and longer. My blood burns in my veins and all you do is pump it around my body." He bites harshly, causing Seifer to recoil slightly, but the hand stays on the male's arm.

"Please Squall. At least let me try. There must be another way, but unless you get better, I won't be able to help you find it."

"Since when did you give a fuck about me Almasy? When did you ever care? Why do you try and save me, when I am too fucking dead to be saved! When it is too late and has been for years. Just because I suddenly get pushed over the edge, it was as if this wasn't my destination in the first place." Angry, the brunette glares at Seifer with a deep seated loathing.

Squall's heart rate was rising, and in his weakened state, he couldn't deal with the stress. However, Kadowaki was currently elsewhere, and so he was alone in his problems.

"Come on Squall. I know you weren't exactly the normal one around, but you weren't depressed before now. I was with you half the time Leonhart; I know what you were like."

"Then you were pretty damn blind. As soon as I took a sharp drop I start getting noticed. Don't tell me you didn't see I was falling." He hisses, but suddenly he becomes short of breath, apparently he couldn't take anymore. Seeing what he'd done, Seifer panics, looking around for the doctor. "What do I do! What's going on?" He yells, looking around for the doctor, who wasn't there.

"G-get…the…n-nuetronium…hydrogliseren." He gasps, pointing to a nearby syringe. Seifer quickly and obediently injects Squall's arm, still obviously unsettled, as he rubs the brunette's belly to try and calm him and help. After a while, he calms, totally drained and appearing to be nearing his end, or at least slipping into unconsciousness.

"Hold on Squall. C'mon, stay with me. You can't die like this."

The Squall glares at him weakly, his eyelids drooping tiredly. "Like you care…" He mumbles painfully, before choking up mouthfuls of crimson blood, staining his chin and the white sheets that covered him. "Just go away. Go wherever the fuck you went when I was still supposed to be strong." He hisses angrily, his hands clenching into fists at his bedside.

Seifer was still looking a little shocked, and strangely upset at the brunette, but Squall continues on. "Get out of here now Almasy. Get lost, with all the others. If you really cared you would have left me alone. Just like them. Everyone says they care but I'm still dying aren't I? I didn't want to be anything. I just wanted to be left alone. I didn't ask for this!" The broken lion chokes out a cry now, tears rolling down his shatteringly hollow cheeks.

"Just let me die…" He whispers painfully, turning his head from Seifer as much as he could and laying still, the crystalline droplets continuing to wet the sheets around him. The blonde was still in shock at Squall's words, something very uncharacteristic of him, usually he was on the ball with quick witted remarks, but now, there was nothing. Only silence and the gentle crying coming from the bed before him.

Squall Leonhart was crying. It had not been seen ever, not even after a fever dream when he was five years old. Because Squall never cried. But that apparently was no longer true, because he was crying right now, and it was all Seifer's fault. The ice walls he had build so meticulously so long ago, and fixed, built up, were melting and becoming the tears that trickled down his porcelain cheeks, and nobody could piece him back together again. The ice that separated him, made him cold and dead inside, was the only thing that had held what was left of him together. A broken man melded by ice. But not even ice could fix him. Breaking apart, losing himself; he was running out of time.

As the brunette begins to drift away from consciousness once more, the blond beside him gently takes his hand, wishing he could somehow help. "I never meant to do this to you. You weren't supposed to fall. Let me fix you. Get better for me Squall…"