Chapter Two: Mouse and Cheese

Disclaimer: I don't own Lost. If I did, I would be working hard on Season 2, not some silly romance fanfiction!

A/N: I know I shouldn't have updated so quickly, but I love to write… so here you go!

"Here I am, once again

I'm torn into pieces.

Can't deny it, can't pretend

Just thought you were the one.

Broken up, deep inside

But you won't get to see the tears I cry

Behind these hazel eyes."- Behind These Hazel Eyes, Kelly Clarkson

Mouse and Cheese

'…Drug runners in disguise. The plane was loaded with heroin.'

Heroin.

Charlie was sweating as he led Claire back into the caves. Her heart was pounding as he grabbed her hand, the only contact he'd made with her in a week.

Charlie was scared to about what Claire's reaction would be once he lifted the pillow, revealing the secret he had kept from her for what seemed like years.

Holding both of her hands kindly in his, he squatted down so he was looking at her directly level. "Do you trust me?"

Suddenly, Claire shivered at the thought of his confession. By the looks of it, it wasn't going to be pretty.

She nodded.

"And do you promise, that no matter what I tell you right now, you won't judge me like everyone else?"

"Charlie," Claire moaned quietly, "Just tell me."

But he was determined. "Say it."

Claire sighed, "I promise I won't judge you."

Charlie didn't want to move. For two minutes, he had talked to her more than he had in three days. He didn't want to break her trust just as it was rekindling.

He let go of her as his fingers started twitching and he hid them nervously in the pocket of his jeans. His eyes were darting to his pillow, wondering how the hell he would tell her about it.

That bloody plane…

Claire stood still, watching him fidget oddly. "Stop shaking." Charlie was now conscious of his spasms, but made no effort to stop them. Claire reached out for his hand. "It's okay. You can tell me about it."

Aaron's cries had softened to little whimpers and he yawned widely.

Why was he doing this to her? To them? Why did he take the drugs? He should've just walked away. He should've ignored the temptation.

But there was no turning back now.

Charlie couldn't speak. He knew he had to tell her… he was sick of lying. He was sick of the constant internal battle whether to take the baggies or not.

All Charlie could do was nod towards his pillow on the ground, feet away from them.

Claire walked over to Charlie's things, wondering what he could be hiding that would scare him so much. When she got there, she lifted the pillow. There was nothing under it but a religious statue.

"What…?"

Charlie's throat was dry, and he was sweating like mad. He tried to say something, to explain himself, but instead, he just choked out one word.

"…Inside."

Claire was beginning feel frightened. Resting Aaron on her side, she bent down to investigate the contents of the Mary figure.

She backed away quickly and closed her eyes, "Oh, God."

"I wanted to get rid of them-"Charlie said hurriedly, trying hard to make it clear that he regretted everything.

Claire's eyes were full of hurt. "You lied to me…"

Charlie shook his head and walked towards her.

"You told me you threw it in the fire." Her voice was rising, and he detected coldness beneath it.

"I did." He started approaching her, carefully. He wanted to sooth her, but he needed to calm down first. Patiently he continued, "These are different. I got them here, on the island."

"Don't expect me to believe that! You've been stashing them in the caves, haven't you? Even when you told me you were clean!"

"Look," Charlie started, "You know the plane where Boone fell? Well, it turns out it was from Nigeria, and there were dealers aboard and-"

"There just happened to be a large collection of heroin, huh?"

Claire was getting tired of it. She needed to leave, not some lame explanation! She had trusted him. She had believed that he was clean, that he had seen the error of his ways…

"Please, don't go."

Charlie was on his knees, holding her hand, needing her with every bone in his body, "I can't start it up again, Claire. I don't want to. Please, please understand that."

Claire's eyes were full of tears as backed away from him, letting go of his grasp. And then she walked out of the cave, sobbing.

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This was all some crude test, wasn't it? Ooh, let's crash a plane of messed up people onto an evil island to test their wits! 5 pounds says the conceited druggie won't make it past a week! Were God and Satan going to pop out of some random bush announcing he failed his after-life test or something? Sorry, you're so wimpy, you aren't allowed in Heaven or Hell. We'll just have to leave you here, then, won't we?

He was beginning to think it was some twist of a mouse-and-cheese experiment. You know, How Long Does It Take for a Proclaimed Ex-Addict Bassist to Finally Under Pressure and Blow Off Everyone He Cared About for a Baggie of Heroin? Set up a maze, and watch him go!

…Or maybe he was on a stupid American reality show, a Fear Factor-Survivor-Dr. Phil spin-off. Some family in Wyoming would be watching him now. Tsk, tsk. That's why you don't try drugs, kids. You don't want to end up like that pathetic Charlie character…

When Jack found him there, he could've sworn Charlie was drunk. Only thing missing: the strong stench of alcohol and the bottle.

"You going to tell me what happened?" Jack asked, sitting down next to him without an invitation.

"I told Claire."

Charlie could feel the stupidity sinking in. He shouldn't have told her this way…

"Told her what?"

Of course Jack wouldn't know. He was an honest bloke who didn't lie to his girlfriend about stealing drugs on the same trip when he was supposed to be rescuing her baby. He also didn't ignore the girl for a week before suddenly dumping more grief on her. Nope, Jack wouldn't know about his problems.

"I told her about the drugs."

"I thought you burned those…"

"I did. But then when Sayid and I went to find the Crazy French Woman and Aaron, there happened to be a large plane full of bloody heroin baggies!"

"So, you're addicted again?" Jack wasn't being judgmental at all. In fact, Jack was taking this much better than Claire had.

"No, haven't had any yet."

"Does Claire know that?"

"She wouldn't let me talk! She just… left." Charlie mentally kicked himself. He knew he should've explained the situation fully before showing her the stupid drugs. He knew if he hadn't taken the statue in the first place, none of this would've happened.

"You should tell her. Maybe she thinks you've been sneaking some behind her back." Jack looked curiously at Charlie. "How did you happen to fall across a plane full of heroin?"

Charlie sighed. He knew Jack would eventually want to know all of the details, being the doctor and leader he was. Plus Jack was looking like his best chance of avoiding addiction, other than Claire. But that didn't turn out very well, did it?

"Well, when we were looking for Aaron, Sayid and I ran a lot. We decided to take a quick brake next to Boone's plane. And there they were." Charlie tried not to explain that they had stopped because wimpy Charlie was tired. "Sayid said that it was a plane from Nigeria, from the maps they found. He also said that the pilots were drug runners disguised as priests."

There was a pause before Jack shook his head. "You have to get rid of them, Charlie."

He hated knowing the truth. "I know. I know. Just right now, I can't bring myself to it."

"Well, I would throw it away for you, but I think you should do it. You know, to end the whole thing once and for all."

And with one last knowing look, Jack left Charlie alone in the caves to drown in his own misery.

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"Is something wrong? You seem… flustered."

Kate and Claire were sitting outside of a tent, Kate holding Aaron and cooing at him.

Claire shook her head. "I'm fine. I guess. I just had a row with Charlie."

"Oh." Kate looked back at Aaron, who was starting to drift off to sleep again.

She reached out to hand him back to Claire. "Hey, Kate, have you seen Sayid anywhere?"

"He's probably helping with the fires at this point."

"Okay, thanks." Claire stood up and wandered around the camp, searching for him. She finally saw Sayid helping someone pile up firewood.

"Hi." She greeted him, and he nodded in return. "Can we talk? I don't want to be interrupting you…"

"No, that's fine," He said, arranging the last of the twigs into place.

Claire paused before getting right to the point. "I was wondering if you could tell me about the day you found Aaron."

"You mean, about Danielle?"

"Well," Claire wasn't exactly sure how to put it, "did you find a plane? Boone's plane?"

Sayid nodded, confused. "Why do you ask?"

"Just curious," Claire didn't want to bring attention to the fact that she and Charlie were fighting. "Thank you, though."

Walking away, Claire thought about Charlie and how much he had helped her over the past month. She wouldn't have made it this whole time, if it wasn't for his care. Didn't he deserve some help as well? And the one time he asks for it, she runs away. It was so typical of her to hide like this. Maybe, this time she could be strong.

Maybe this time she could be strong like Charlie.

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A/N: Off to vacation tomorrow. I wanted to get another update in here before I left. Hope you all enjoyed the double update, because I'll be gone for 10 days. But don't worry, I will still be writing when I'm gone, just not posting.

I know I haven't left the first chapter up long enough for more reviews, but I got 51 hits for this ONE chapter! But of course, I want to thank those (very) few, yet wonderful, people who took the time to review!

A Teenage Werewolf- Thank you so much! I love reviews like this that give me good feedback!

crookedview- I agree! He wants to be good so badly, but he needs a little help from Claire to make the change. Thank you!

charlieclaire4ever- Love the pen name! Thank you, and here's the update that you ordered. But don't get too used to it. Now you'll have to wait a little over a week. But I think you'll manage. Lol.

Hope you liked it! Don't forget to review! ;-)

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