It's been two years since it happened, two years since my life fell apart. His voice still echoes in the very core of my soul, but it's empty. Forgotten. His life slipped through my own, his body impossible to hold, a snowflake in my hand that has merely melted away by my own warmth.

I now hide behind the smile, woken to find myself encased in shadows. I can't forget it, the pain still lingers. No matter how much I want it to go away, it always remains within my heart, burning like a wild fire. I have grown so willing of this lie I live, that the truth is buried and smothered like the life I once grasped in my hands.

Flashback

The night was cold and bitter as snow nipped at the window, a flame crackling in the Manson fireplace. Raven haired with a bitter look on her face, young fourteen year old Sam sat on the family couch, sipping hot chocolate ridded with marshmallows, fingers grasping the mug handle.

A large plasma screen TV flickered with light in front of her, purple eyes gazing intently at a Christmas special she had been watching for the past half hour. Her parents had left for Colorado for the holidays, hoping Sam would join them, but their daughter had turned them down.

This holiday Tucker and Danny were staying in Amity Park, and she did anything to get away from her parents for a little while. Reluctantly, her mother and father had agreed to let her stay home over the Christmas weekend with her grandmother, so here Sam was on her couch alone, awaiting Tucker and Danny to arrive within a few minutes.

Suddenly the phone rang beside her, making Sam jump and spill some hot chocolate on her black skirt. Frustrated with herself, she wiped off the cocoa with a napkin and picked up the phone as Mrs. Fenton's voice was heard from the other line.

"Oh Sam, I'm sorry for ruining your holiday but," her voice held sobs and pain as she spoke, her voice quivering.

"Mrs. Fenton? What's wrong?" Sam's mind went into hyper drive; she had never heard Danny's mother cry before, or, at least, not this hard and panicked.

"Sam… we found Danny on the sidewalk earlier… he… he…"

"He what?" Sam was frantic now, her voice starting to quiver as well.

"Oh Sam, we're sorry, but Danny was shot… he's gone…"

And at that moment the mug dropped from Sam's hand, crashing on the wooden floor and splitting into a hundred tiny pieces, just like her heart.

End Flashback

Well, that was then, and this is now. After that day, my parents flew right home. They held my head in their arms and said sorry more than I can count. They said they understood how I felt, but never would they understand. I always pulled away, walking to my room as tears streamed from my eyes.

There I would linger for hours, my tears numbing my face as I left the window open. The snow would always poor in slowly, the wind nipping at my hands. The candles that usually lighted my room then burned out, my hair matted and tangled, my eyes slowly beginning to fade into a shade of gray.

Tucker would usually call and try to help, but I always hung up after he spoke of Danny. I couldn't bare the fact anymore, the fact that he was gone. And I still can't. I still lay in my room frozen in that time period. You know that saying about how you don't know what you have until it's gone?

Well... it's gone.

This night, the window was still open beside me as I buried my head in my hands. It has been two years since Danny had died. Snow once more fell outside and the wind had picked up recently, blowing through my room and whipping my curtains around.

But did I care? No.

I still cried at night, every night to be exact, and I still thought of the times that Danny was alive and well, the times when he would blush and we would hold hands; accidentally or purposely. My black hair was tipped in my own tears as they streamed from my face. Sobs escaped my mouth and I couldn't take it anymore.

He is gone, I thought silently, holding my breath as another sob was let loose. And no one can change that…

"Sam…" A warm voice appeared behind me, but I didn't look up from my hands. I didn't speak towards whoever was approaching on me, whoever had walked into my room and found me crying.

"Sam… it's me,"

A hand touched my shoulder and my mouth fell open, tears still streaming but controlled briefly. The wind seemed to subside as I gazed up into ice blue eyes…