Disclaimer: Not mine. And "I'm Too Sexy" ain't mine, either. All that belongs to me is Wendy and Frankie. Thazzit.

Shall We Dance?

"Sorry for taking so long," Wendy said, tearing herself away from the exhibit on the Tibetan monk's pottery. "What do you two want to see next?" But as she turned around to face Willy and Charlie, she saw that they were nowhere to be found. Wendy sighed, assuming that they had grown bored and had moved on to the next exhibit, so she headed through the door to the next room.

She didn't find them in that room either, though. Or the next. Trying to quell the alarm growing in her mind, she jogged back to the last room she knew they had been in and asked a guard whether he had seen a tall man, dressed in blue with a top hat and carrying a museum map, and a small brown-haired boy wearing a patterned sweater and faded trousers.

"Sure I did, miss. They left here about half and hour ago," he responded. Wendy was now seriously worried. She hurried back to the wing from which they had entered that contained the museum offices, thinking that someone might have seen them. As a matter of fact, several people had seen the pair leave through the back doors about fifteen minutes before. When Wendy stormed outside, she was not at all surprised to see that the Glass Elevator was gone as well. She let out a string of curse words that would have given her mother a heart attack and yanked her mobile phone from her purse, punching the numbers to call a taxi as though they each had Willy's face on them.

On the way back to the factory, she sat in the backseat with her arms crossed and thought about everything she'd like to do to Willy and Charlie once she got her hands on them. Wendy's daydream of running over them with her motorbike was interrupted as the taxi pulled to the front gates of the factory and the driver asked for his fare. She threw a few notes at him and strode up to the gates. They opened up for her straight away. (Willy had, at first, asked the Oompa Loompas to not let her in after she had gone out to do errands, but Wendy had managed to clamber over the top by leaning her motorcycle upright against the gates and using the brick wall for traction. It had taken her a good three-quarters of an hour, with Willy, dumbfounded and rather impressed, watching her progress on the TV screen in the Security Office. Wendy threatened to let Frankie loose in the Chocolate Room if he ever pulled that on her again, however, so that was the end of that.)

Wendy stomped into the front hallway before she realized that she had no idea where the two would be. She hadn't been to many rooms in the factory; indeed, the only rooms she had visited were hers, Charlie's, and Wonka's rooms, the Chocolate Room, and the Taffy Room. Wendy bit her lip, thinking, then decided to try to find an Oompa Loompa to help her. With a start, she realized that she had left Frankie alone and locked in a room for several hours by himself. While Wendy knew that he was self-sufficient, she felt rather guilty about leaving him behind, so she first decided to stop by and see him, thinking that perhaps she could sic Frankie on the germaphobic chocolatier. She needn't have worried about her large companion, however– Frankie had apparently hit it off with the Oompa Loompas.

Wendy opened the door to her room to discover Frankie lying on the bed, being petted and pampered by a small army of Oompa Loompas. She rolled her eyes.

"You big lazy mongrel," she muttered, giving his tail a playful tug. He opened one eye, then closed it, as though he couldn't be bothered to greet his mistress. Wendy chuckled, but quickly sobered as she remembered her mission to track down Wonka and Charlie.

"'Scuse me," she said, addressing the Oompa Loompas clustered around the bed. She was sure that they understood English, but she didn't know if they spoke much of it. "Do any of you know where I might find Mr. Wonka? I'm sure he took the Elevator back, but I don't know where he would have parked it…"

One of the Oompa Loompas nodded and led her out of the room, with Wendy following gratefully. The factory was huge, and if she searched for the missing pair she would most assuredly get lost. It seemed as though they had been walking for hours before the Oompa Loompa (whose name, Wendy learned, was Quincy) tugged open a small metal door. The room inside was nothing spectacular. In fact, it reminded Wendy of a miniature helicopter pad. She supposed that this was where he landed his unconventional aircraft when returning to the factory. Most unfortunately for Wendy, however, the small hangar was empty. She swore in frustration. They should have been back by now…

Wendy wondered for a moment whether or not she should tell Sarah. She knew that her younger sister would go ballistic on the pair of them once they returned. But then Wendy got to thinking…what if Sarah blamed her? She was the responsible adult in this case, seeing as Willy could be called neither "responsible" nor "adult". Wendy grimaced as she imagined Sarah screaming at her for losing her one and only child. Nope, she was not telling Sarah about this.

"Quincy, dear," she said through clenched teeth, "would you please direct me to a place where I can wait for Mr. Wonka until he returns from his little trip?" The small man hesitated, then nodded in the affirmative once again, and they were off. This walk, however, was much shorter. Quincy paused in front of a pair of huge, intricately carved wooden doors with ornate brass handles. He crossed his arms over his chest then brought them down to his sides again. Wendy copied the movement, vaguely remembering both Willy and Charlie using it while talking to the Oompa Loompas.

Wendy noticed two small plaques hanging over each handle. Both had the word "Pull" engraved on them in a curly, flourished script. She grasped a handle and pulled, but nothing happened. Frowning, she tried the other door with the same results. Just her luck, the doors were locked. Wendy scanned the doors, looking for a keyhole, but she didn't see one. She gave a huge sigh and leaned back against the doors, feeling rather worn out for the day's adventures, but as soon as she had rested all her weight on the doors they opened inward and she fell through the doorway.

Had Wendy been in a better mood, she might have thought that the misleading sign was funny, but she was not in the mood for stupid jokes. Scowling, she turned around to look at Wonka's office. Wendy had expected it to be wild and zany, but it was relatively normal, in fact.

The room was large, and three of the four walls had floor-to-ceiling bookshelves crammed with literature on them. The fourth wall, the one directly across from the door that Wendy had entered through, was just one large window, overlooking the small town. The bookshelves were mahogany, as was the huge desk in the center of the room. There was only one chair in the room. It looked rather like a throne and was upholstered in plush burgundy velvet.

Wendy immediately sat down in it and turned her attention to Wonka's desk. She began rummage though his desk, knowing she was snooping in his personal things and not caring a bit. She eyed his top-of-the-line, flat screen computer with jealousy. Managing to tear her eyes away, Wendy open up a few drawers and rifled through some papers. She had just discovered a drawer full of multicolored latex gloves when she heard a door open and saw an irate Wonka and a nervous Charlie standing in the doorway.

"One of my trusted employees told me you were in here," he sneered. "Without my permission, I might add. Not very polite of you."

She crossed her arms and frowned at them, leaning back in the chair and propping her tennis shoe clad feet on the desk, nearly giving Willy a heart attack.

"Feet – desk – NO!" he choked out. Wendy hopped out of the chair and stood in front of him, staring daggers at Willy and Charlie both. They gulped in unison.

"Do you two have any idea, any at all, about what you put me through today?" she hissed quietly.

"Please, Aunt Wendy, we didn't mean to worry you– " Charlie put in quickly.

"Oh? Well, then, what do you call abandoning me in the museum like that?" Wendy began pacing agitatedly in front of them, then turned abruptly to face Willy. "Honestly! How was I to know where you were? You could have been kidnapped or something for all I knew!"

"Kidnapped?" Willy scoffed. "Puh-lease. We were perfectly safe. I was just letting Charlie take the Elevator out for a spin."

"You what!"

The conversation went south from there.

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After nearly half an hour of Wendy screaming herself hoarse at the two, Willy finally decided that enough was enough, and that Wendy did have a point. He supposed that he was being irresponsible and reckless, although he had never really worried about those types of things before. Still, he had to set a good example for Charlie, and he did feel rather bad about upsetting Wendy so. Willy held up a gloved hand, a sign for her to shut up, and tried to look properly remorseful.

"My dear Wendy," he said in a sincere, apologetic tone. "You can be sure that I am most ashamed of my actions today. I was being completely immature and irresponsible. I am so very, very sorry, and I promise it will not happen again." He shot her a dazzling, fake smile. Wendy was absolutely flabbergasted, and Charlie beamed proudly at his mentor.

"I…well, it seems you've learned your lesson," Wendy mumbled, the wind clearly taken from her sails. "Lucky for you, I didn't tell Sarah." Horrified looks spread over Willy and Charlie's faces as they thought of her reaction. Wendy tried not to laugh. "You two owe me big time, by the way."

"Hey! I know just the thing!' Willy burst out excitedly. Grinning, he leaned down and whispered into Charlie's ear. Charlie started grinning, too, and nodded his agreement.

"Great idea, Mr. Wonka," he said. "I'm sure she'll love it."

"What? What will I love?" asked Wendy, cocking her head to one side and looking terribly confused.

"You'll see," Willy replied mysteriously. "We'll pick you up at eight. Wear comfortable clothes. Now go, we've got work to do!" And Wendy was ushered out of the room, mystified by the rather one-sided conversation and a bit worried about the impending event that evening.

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"Knock knock!" Willy called cheerfully, tapping his cane on the door to Wendy's room.

"Come on in," Wendy yelled back. Willy opened the door and saw Wendy closing a laptop that had obviously seen a lot of use. Frankie greeting Willy while Wendy got ready. She swiftly pulled her hair back into a ponytail, smoothing curls into some semblance of order, watching Willy recoil from the large dog's happy kisses.

After the earlier enigmatic conversation, she had bugged Charlie for the rest of the day, asking him about what they were taking her to tonight, but he kept his mouth shut. Wendy had even asked Sarah, but all she got was a grin and an assurance from Jacob that she would have fun. After a while she retired to her room, fed up with the inhabitants of the factory and their secrets. Wendy finished tying her shoelaces and stood, stretching.

"Ready to go?" she asked with a weary sigh.

Willy, ever the gentleman, extended a gloved hand and Wendy hesitantly placed her own inside it. They stepped out into the hall, walking straight into the closed doors of the Glass Elevator that Willy had, for some reason, parked directly outside of Wendy's room. Flushing slightly, Willy opened the doors and they stepped inside. He immediately pressed a button near the floor, and the Elevator took off.

Wendy restrained herself from asked where they were going, knowing she would not get an answer. Instead, she crossed her arms and watched the factory fly past. Willy, on the other hand, was watching Wendy.

He wasn't sure why, but she was starting to grow on him. He had tried so hard not to like her, not to become friends, out of habit more than anything else. But Charlie had showed him that having friends was one of life's greatest treasures. So as long as she was here, he might as well make the best of it. He did feel kind of bad for abandoning her like that at the museum, after all. And that was why he had decided to invite her to the Oompa Loompa's big bash that night. Charlie had promised him that she'd like it, and Willy hoped it would make up for being immature earlier.

Now, everyone all know that those mischievous little imps love to sing and dance. When Willy had brought them to his factory, he had catered to their love of music and introduced them to all sorts of music genres, ranging from classical to rap to pop to show tunes…the list went on. Somewhere along the line, the Oompa Loompas had discovered karaoke. So, because Willy was attached to his faithful, hardworking employees, he had set up a party, one night a month, where the Oompa Loompa could strut their stuff on the dance floor and sing along to their favorite songs. Thus, the Oompa Loompa Karaoke and Dance Party was born.

The Elevator stopped in front of a pair of double doors with two sets of handles, one set at normal adult height, and the other much lower. Wendy deduced that Oompa Loompas must frequently use this room. Willy threw open the doors with a flourish, and Wendy was speechless. She seemed to be getting that way a lot around the flamboyant candy man, she noticed, but she didn't have time to think on it much then, because she was awash in a sea of colors and sounds.

The huge room was dim, though colored lamps sent spots of light spinning across the floor, walls, and ceiling, and there was a disco ball hanging from the ceiling (of course). An enormous sound system was set up in one corner, with an Oompa Loompa DJ picking the tunes, then blasting them through speakers that dwarfed the tiny dancers. Wendy was absolutely entranced by them; they had moves! Willy grinned.

"Come on, Wendy!" Willy insisted, joining the dancing Oompa Loompas. Wendy stood off to the side and watched as Willy started to bust a few moves himself. Wendy watched in fascination as he moonwalked back towards her.

"Where on earth did you learn how to do that?" asked Wendy, rather impressed. Willy shrugged and grinned.

"You pick things up." He grabbed Wendy by the arm and tried to pull her onto the dance floor. "Come on! You gotta dance!"

Wendy hung back, a bit self-conscious. "Well, I don't really…"

"Sure you do!" Willy giggled happily as he heard the strains of a good dancing song start up. "You'll know this one," he assured her. Wendy recognized it instantly. She grinned and shook her head, but joined Willy in dancing. She did know the moves to this one. And really, unless you've been living under a rock for the past ten years, you know the Macarena.

As she was dancing, Wendy suddenly had a thought. The reasonable, responsible bit of her brain was telling her how absurd this all was…doing the Macarena? With a bunch of elves and a possible psychotic, reclusive chocolatier with major people issues? In the largest, most famous chocolate factory in the world?

Wendy, you do not dance, her brain said. You are a writer. You travel places and talk to people and write human-interest stories. You hate dancing in front of or with other people. You should be writing your book right now. What on earth do you think you're doing?

But then the fun-loving, uninhibited bit of her brain that she had been trying to keep under control since college shot back with a sassy, SO WHAT? And Wendy found she didn't particularly want to be adult and responsible and do work like she ought to. So, laughing insanely, she bumped hips with Willy and shot him a very large smile. The song wound to a close, and Willy looked at her like she was crazy

"You look kinda freaky and possessed, you know. Any particular reason why?" he asked a bit warily.

"Nope. None at all," she said happily. "I'm going to get a drink, be right back, ok?" Willy nodded, and she headed off to a table with a large punch bowl and poured herself a glass. Not surprisingly, it was delicious. She held up a cup and waved it at Willy, asking if he wanted some, but he declined. Refreshed, Wendy sashayed back over to where he stood and grinned again, feeling extremely relaxed and happy. Willy asked Wendy something she would never have thought he would ask anyone, ever. Of course, most of her preconceptions about the eccentric candy man were being tossed out the window tonight anyway.

"I'll betcha know how to swing dance, right?" he said, looking rather pleased about something.

"Swing dance? I haven't in ages," Wendy objected, but her protests fell on deaf ears Willy grabbed her hand.

"What happed to your 'no touching' rule, Willy?" she grumbled, not really wanting to give as much energy as swing dancing required.

"No excuses, Wendy dear!" he shouted happily over the big band music that was now blaring form the speakers. He twirled her around once, then smirked. "Think you can keep up with me? If not, I understand completely," he said knowingly. Of course Wendy couldn't let this comment slide, so she grabbed his other hand.

"Don't worry, I can keep up," she said, hoping that this was true. The tempo sped up, and they were off.

They stepped together, then back, then, hands still clasped together, they spun around once. He let go of her right hand and Wendy stepped to the right, now parallel with Willy, then he tugged on her left arm and she spun back in, his arm now around her waist. He let go, but turned her so she would face him. By now, Wendy was simply following his lead. Willy grabbed Wendy's left with his right and vice versa, so their arms were crossed. He let go of one hand and leaned back, nearly sitting on the floor and reaching back with his free hand, in a kind of a squat. Wendy copied his movements; she had done this before. They did this a few times, then stood. Willy flexed his fingers, then grabbed Wendy's waist. Instinctively, she put her hands over his, but soon realized what he had in store for her.

Taking a deep breath (Wendy snorted indignantly; she wasn't that heavy!), Willy lifted Wendy and swung her left, then the right, then onto the floor and let go, so that she slid into a waiting group of Oompa Loompas who hauled her up. Dizzily, she stepped forward, vaguely applauding herself for wearing jeans and not a skirt. But Willy still had one move left to make. He grabbed Wendy's right hand and spun her in like he had earlier, with his arms around her waist, then dipped her backwards so that the tip of her ponytail brushed the floor. He brought her back up with a flourish as the song ended and took a huge bow, making Wendy do the same. The Oompa Loompas cheered and whistled. Willy beamed at his beloved employees and friends. Wendy tottered away to a chair, feeling a bit lightheaded.

Where had he ever learned how to do that? she wondered to herself, sipping another glass of punch that a thoughtful Oompa Loompa had brought her. She sat out the next several dances, preferring instead to watch the Oompa Loompas and Willy. She was convinced by several Oompa Loompas to join them in "moshing", however. She wasn't quite sure what it was, but in her somewhat drunken haze she didn't care. (Because, of course, the Oompa Loompas had spiked the punch. No wonder Willy hadn't wanted any.)

Willy insisted that she do the Electric Slide as the evening wore on, however, and for the last dance song of the night, she didn't need convincing. Wendy was a great fan of the Chicken Dance, and Willy got a huge kick out of watching her flap her arms like an idiot.

After the Chicken Dance was over, the Oompa Loompa began moving furniture and bringing out tables and chairs. Most were sized to accommodate the small workers, but they did set up one table that was normal sized. Wendy looked at Willy curiously.

"What are they setting up for? Oh, is it the karaoke part?" she asked excitedly.

"Yeah. Hey, if you wanna leave now, that's fine…" Willy began pushing her towards the door.

"No. I want to stay. Are you going to sing?" Wendy bit her lip trying so hard not to smile.

"They make me. Every single time we have this thing, they make me," Willy groaned.

"Let's not keep them waiting, then." Wendy pushed him toward the microphone the Oompa Loompas had set up. Two of them grabbed Willy's pants legs and were towing him towards it. Willy tossed his cane back to Wendy and sighed in resignation. If he was going to sing, it might as well be something fun. He had just the song, in fact. Hopefully it would make Wendy regret her decision to stay and watch, though with the potency of the Oompa Loompas preferred liquor, Willy doubted that Wendy would remember much of anything in the morning. Wendy settled herself at the table just in front of Willy and twirled his cane absently. Willy grabbed the microphone then nodded once to cue the music.

When Wendy heard the first few notes of the song, it seemed familiar, though she couldn't place it at first. But when Willy started singing, she seriously thought she might die.

"I'm too sexy for my love, too sexy for my love– love's gonna leave me." Willy winked and slowly stripped off his coat. He began to swing it over his head, stripper style, as he sang the next verse.

"I'm too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt." He tossed his jacket straight at Wendy and she caught it, absolutely speechless. This was…wrong, but in a good way. She kept watching in fascination.

When Willy came to the catwalk verse, he did, indeed do the turn on the catwalk. Wendy was slightly surprised at how adept he was at this…as though he'd had practice on the runway. She shoved that thought out of her mind at once. Willy, a model? Too off-the-wall, even for him.

"I'm too sexy for my hat-" Here, of course, he tossed his hat into the air, and Wendy reached out an arm to catch it. Willy sighed with relief. He was a bit worried there for a second.

Wendy, now wearing his hat and hugging his coat (which smelled like peanut brittle, she noticed) and holding his cane, clapped loudly as he finished the song with a flourish.

"Bravo, bravo!" she shouted, giggling. Willy wiped his forehead with a handkerchief. "That wasn't too bad, was it now, Willy?"

"Easy for you to say," he grumbled, but he was grinning. "But seriously, I think you need to go to bed– you're looking kind of wobbly and green." Wendy felt wobbly and green; she had, by this time, realized what was in the punch and was inwardly kicking herself for not noticing it earlier.

"I agree completely," she said. Wendy held out Willy's coat, hat, and cane. "Here. You can stay– I think I'm going to have a nice lie-down…"

"No, no. I'll walk you back to your room," said Willy, slipping in his coat and placing his hat on his head. He proffered an arm and Wendy gratefully leaned on it, now beginning to feel the after-effects of the punch. And she had thought the Oompa Loompas were sweet and nice little people.

Wendy was very glad that they were not taking the Elevator– she wasn't sure if she was quite up to it. The pair strolled back to Wendy's room, not really saying much, but enjoying a comfortable silence.

"Why didn't the Buckets come?" Wendy asked suddenly. She had been wondering about it for a while.

"I don't know. They came to all the other ones. I asked them to come this time, but they declined. Even Charlie. Most unusual," he said, thinking. They stopped before Wendy's door and Willy nodded briskly.

"Well…goodnight, then," he said awkwardly, turning to leave.

"Wait." He stopped and faced Wendy again. She wrapped him in a huge bear hug, pinning his arms to his sides and squeezing. Willy stiffened visibly, extremely unnerved by this show of affection. Wendy let go. "Thank you, Willy. I had a…very nice time tonight. Although I think I may regret it in the morning." She grinned and entered her room, closing the door behind her. Willy stood in front of the door for a second, still a bit taken aback by her hug.

It hadn't been horrible. He hadn't fainted, or screamed, or anything like that. Willy pressed the call button for the Elevator and pondered as he waited. It was…most unusual.

A/N: Well, I don't think it was as long as the last wait. I have been writing every single day, but I kept going back and changing stuff, so… Anyways, I hope you guys liked this chapter. I think it's ok, but it doesn't thrill me. I don't think the dancing part or the karaoke part turned out very well. Sorry. Read and Review, guys! I want to know how I can improve. As for Chapter 10…hmm. Not quite sure yet. (!) I may put in this bit that I have been DYING to write…but I really will keep that one a secret.

As I said in the last chapter, I will no longer be replying to reviews in my story. So if you want a reply, include your email in your review. Happy reading!

Oh, and one more thing– if you haven't yet, please check out Maleficent Angel's story "Circus of Life". It is absolutely wonderful. I know I plug it in practically every chapter, but it's just that good! Ilurve it. Tata for now, darlings.