My Sun, My Supernova
Chapter 5
Short Circuit
The new day is fresh from the night's rain, the heat wave having finally been washed away in its wake. The burning sun remains, but at least the suffering intensity of its rays have diminished, and some welcome relief has been obtained.
Sanzo throws open the curtains with gusto, letting in the light and warmth of the sun to fill the room. The sunshine drenches across the floor to strike upon Goku where he lays still asleep, glittering off of the power-limiter he is forced to wear and bathing his face with its glow.
Sanzo turns from the window and leans against the windowsill, lazily regarding the sleeping shape. A deep sleeper, Goku has not yet stirred since Sanzo has been up and moving about the room. Sanzo runs his fingers through his hair, and then uses his hands to push off from the wall where he leans, stepping quickly over to crouch at Goku's side.
After a moment's contemplation, the corners of his eyes crinkle in amusement, and he blows softly onto Goku's face. At the lack of response, Sanzo bounces slightly on his toes, tapping his fingers on his knee. Then impatience gives way to a mischievous glint in his eyes and a small smirk twitches across his lips.
Dropping to his knees and leaning in close, he blows directly into Goku's ear, and then draws back a little, still leaning over the other as he waits for the reaction. Goku makes a small muffled noise and cracks open his eyes.
"Morning."
At the sound of Sanzo's voice, he forces his sleepy eyes apart all the way, and then starts as he becomes aware of Sanzo's face hovering over his own.
"Sanzo?"
"Time to rise and shine, Goku."
Goku allows himself a moment to squint up into Sanzo's eyes, still dazed from sleep. Then Sanzo abruptly stands, taking his shadow with him and leaving Goku's eyes no longer shielded from the sun. He blinks and sits up.
"Goku, what are you doing on the floor, might I ask?"
"Huh? You… didn't you tell me to get off the bed last night?"
He suddenly feels chilly despite the warmth of the room as he remembers Sanzo's previous cold treatment towards him.
"You really took that seriously, did you? I was only teasing with my silly little monkey. You should know that by now."
Goku frowns. What the heck did Sanzo just say? Swallowing his hesitation, he decides to ask his question.
"Sanzo, are you…is everything all right? Did something bad come up at the reading last night?"
Sanzo chuckles slightly.
"Everything's fine, Goku. In fact, that was the last session. I finally have my answers, and everything is so clear now, it feels… so liberating."
"Sanzo? Are you sure…"
Before Goku can finish his sentence, Sanzo squats down behind him and places a hand gently over his lips, leaning in to whisper in his ear.
"Shhh..."
Goku shivers as a pleasant tingling sensation travels through his body. Sanzo's breath is warm against the skin of his neck as the softly whispered words continue.
"Goku, I have something to tell you, but it's a secret. Hakkai and Gojyo don't even need to know. I know you don't like secrets, but this is important. It's just between you and I. Can you keep my secret safe for me, Goku?"
Goku nods his head, feeling quite overwhelmed.
"That's what I wanted to hear, Goku. Now, go eat your breakfast, and we'll talk about it later, Okay?"
Goku nods again, and Sanzo lets his hand slip slowly from it's position over Goku's mouth, and stands, moving to the table to retrieve his smokes.
Dazed, confused and blushing profusely, Goku stands groggily and makes his way out to the kitchen. Pausing at the door, he turns back to watch as Sanzo lights up his cigarette, and frowns.
Sanzo looks so uncharacteristically relaxed this morning. Plus, there's something weird about his appearance. He has the sutra draped over his shoulders, but minus the robe. All he's wearing are his jeans with the black top and gloves. Goku notes also that Sanzo has tied his hair back into a small ponytail, and simply tucked his gun casually down the back of his pants.
It's been hard enough sometimes lately not to stare at Sanzo, but now, Goku has to shake his head and force himself to look away before he melts on the spot. Attempting to distract himself with thoughts of food, he continues on to go and have his breakfast.
XXX
The afternoon finds the two of them meandering the streets, as Sanzo leads them on an apparently aimless path through the village.They spend some time wandering through the market, buying lunch, cigarettes, good luck charms (because Sanzo says he thinks it's funny) and, to Goku's puzzlement, a little pocket knife that seems to catch Sanzo's fancy.
Eventually, Sanzo stops in front of a small building, and Goku recognizes it as the fortune-teller's shop.
"Hey, Sanzo, I though you said… "
"Relax, Goku. I just have to pick something up, and then we're done here. Why don't you wait outside? I'll just be a minute."
After a few minutes of waiting, however, Goku grows bored and peers in through the door to see what the hold up is. To his surprise, Sanzo seems to be searching for something, as he busily goes through the assortment of herbs and strange concoctions in the shop. He takes a whiff of each one and examines various items, before finally seeming to locate what he's after, stuffing it into the bag with the cigarettes. When he emerges from the shop, he briefly puts his arm around Goku's shoulders, before brushing his hand across the boy's back as he draws away.
"Goku, let's go."
"Sanzo, is it okay for you just to take stuff?"
Sanzo gives him a sharp look.
"I thought I told you to wait outside. What were you doing spying on my business?"
"Ahh… I…"
Sanzo sighs.
"Never mind. It's a parting gift. She said I could choose whichever incense I want."
"Oh."
"Cheer up, Goku. Do you want me to buy you something else to eat?"
"Okay. I am pretty hungry."
"Of course you are. And afterwards, we can talk about that little secret I mentioned earlier."
Goku blushes again, remembering the incident from this morning, and tags along behind Sanzo as they leave the fortune-teller's shop behind.
XXX
Back in the room at their host's house, Sanzo carefully shuts the door and draws the curtains, before sitting at the table and indicating for Goku to take the other seat.
Goku sits, waiting nervously while Sanzo flicks on his lighter and ignites the end of yet another cigarette. After a couple of suspenseful drags, he finally turns his attention on his companion.
"Goku. I've been thinking, and I've come to the conclusion that we are definitely in the wrong line of work. Religion doesn't suit me, never did, never will. I know some regretful things happened in the past, but it's time to get over it and move on."
Sanzo pauses for another leisurely breath of smoke as Goku stares at him from across the table.
"Humans and demons, their time for harmonious living is over. Hmph. As if humans ever fully accepted demons as equals to begin with. You and I, on the other hand, we've got a connection. Together, we can do anything."
He fixes his eyes on Goku, his entire demeanour an odd display of casual intensity.
"I say, fuck the gods and their holy mission. If Kougaiji wants to revive Gyuumaoh, then good for him. What concern is it of ours?"
By now, Goku is gaping so hard, one would think his eyes are about to fall out of their sockets. Sanzo seems not to notice as he continues.
"Course, he needs my scripture to do it. That's the catch. By ordering Genjo Sanzo on this mission, the gods are sending the weapon of destruction right into the enemy's hands, putting faith in us to do the job right and not let that happen. And if I do nothing, Kougaiji comes after me for it anyway."
There is another pause as Sanzo makes use of the ashtray.
"So, I say, we go west, we hand over the scripture, and then we simply sit back and watch the fireworks. Game over."
There is a small, strangled sound of shock from Goku, and his eyes widen even more at Sanzo's next sentence.
"Oh, I'm being rude, aren't I? I forgot to offer you a cigarette."
Goku blinks, and Sanzo shrugs.
"Suit yourself. "
Goku leans back in his chair, utterly speechless, as Sanzo's unbelievable words continue.
"As for Hakkai and Gojyo, I can see them having a little problem with all this. So we don't tell them our plans. They think we're going west to fight? So let them fight."
He shrugs again, and leans forward in his chair.
"Now, you might be thinking, why not just hand over the scripture now and get it over with? Well, that's just not my style. Genjo Sanzo does not surrender anything, unless it's in my own special way."
He narrows his eyes at Goku.
"The gods can take their precious scripture and rot in hell. I serve no one but myself. Free of everything, not bound by anything, only live your life just as it is."
"S… Sanzo?"
"Are you with me, Goku? Can you still see the light?"
"Sanzo…"
"Shhh. Remember, this is a secret between you and I. We'll meet with Hakkai and Gojyo in the morning, but breath a word of this to either of them, or to anyone, and you might find yourself lost in the dark, with no more sun to light your way. I don't want that to happen, Goku, do you?"
XXX
Night arrives with nothing more being said regarding Sanzo's revelation to Goku. Goku does not known what to say. He's still in shock, with absolutely no idea what to think.
Emotionally exhausted, Goku prepares himself for bed. Just as he's wondering rather confusedly if he should use the bed or the floor, Sanzo suddenly puts out the light in the room, gazing at Goku intently in the dark, his cigarette burning with a fiery orange glow and casting an eerie light upon his face. His voice, when he speaks, is all black velvet, and it wraps around Goku like an alluring caress.
"Your eyes, the way they shine in the dark. You electrify me."
Goku watches, fascinated, as Sanzo discards his cigarette and begins to approach, like a shadow on the move, or a feline stalking it's prey. His heart pounds as Sanzo closes the distance between them.
Soon, Sanzo is directly in front of him, and still he doesn't stop. He keeps moving forward, forcing Goku to back away. This continues, like a slow dance in the dark, until Goku feels his back come up against the wall, and he catches his breath in surprise.
Sanzo does not stop his advance even now, and as he proceeds to press his slender body against Goku's smaller, more compact form, the unexpected pyhsical contact makes Goku gasp again.
When Sanzo gracefully bends his incredibly pale, supple neck to dip his head and nuzzle Goku delicately on the throat, slipping one hand onto the back of Goku's own neck as he does so, Goku forgets to breath at all. The nuzzling becomes a kiss, and Goku forgets how to breath, period. When the kiss progresses to gentle nibbling and sucking, hell, Goku forgets his own name. That is, until Sanzo whispers it into his ear before teasing the earlobe by nipping it lightly. At this, Goku finally releases his breath with a faint sound that can only be called a moan.
In response, Sanzo pulls away, trapping Goku within smoldering violet eyes. One mesmerizing moment of expectant wonder, and then…
Sanzo's lips are upon Goku's, and Goku moans into his mouth and revels in the sweet tongue that finds his own.
Warmth becomes heat. Confusion becomes surrender. Nothing exists beyond this moment, this touch...
This perfect ecstasy.
Sanzo shifts his body slightly, pressing in closer, and our favourite monkey king seriously thinks he might have died and gone straight to Heaven.
Suddenly, the taste of blood invades Goku's senses, and, alarmed, he disengages the contact.
Annoyed, Sanzo tightens his hold on the back of Goku's neck in frustration and attempts to reinitiate the kiss, but before he can recapture those fugitive lips, Goku has noticed the source of the unwelcome interruption.
"Sanzo, your nose, it's bleeding."
Sanzo looks startled, and then his eyes cloud over. He touches his face in disbelief, and stares at the blood that comes away on his fingers.
"Shit."
Quickly, he goes to the table, turns on the light, and begins digging in his things for something, finally pulling out the packet he had taken from the mystic's shop.
With haste, he sets the incense burning, and goes to the bathroom to clean up the blood.
As soon as Sanzo is out of sight, Goku slumps against the wall, his skin flushed and his senses still buzzing with confusion and excitement. In a daze, he goes and throws himself onto the bed.
When Sanzo reappears, his mood is obviously not a good one, and Goku thinks it wise to leave him undisturbed, pretending to be asleep. In truth, his heart almost has a panic attack when Sanzo takes the place next to him on the bed. However, the blond simply rolls onto his side, facing away from Goku, and soon falls sound asleep. It is quite some time before Goku manages to follows suit.
XXX
Some time later, Goku finds himself awakening in the middle of the night. He lies still for a moment, listening. Something feels off, and it disturbs him. Turning his head, he notices Sanzo isn't next to him. He scans the room, which turns out to be empty. Then it hits him. Blood. He can smell blood, Sanzo's blood.
He frowns, thinking that Sanzo must be having another nosebleed. Concerned and unsettled, he gets up to look for his companion, going to check the bathroom. Sanzo is in there all right, but it's not just a nosebleed that Goku smells.
Sanzo seems not to notice Goku, and appears quite occupied with his activity. In his hand, he holds the little knife that he had purchased earlier, and he is busily in the process of cutting into the flesh of his own forearm.
Goku is about to call out, and then pauses in sudden alarm. Sanzo is not just randomly cutting away; he's actually carving something into his skin, a word.
S I N
Again, Goku starts to go forward to intervene, when suddenly Sanzo throws back his head with a hiss of pleasure, and starts to laugh.
It is a delirious, hysterical, pointless kind of laughter, one that just goes on and on even as it seems to steal his breath, and Goku becomes afraid. He is afraid as he watches Sanzo drop the knife in a puddle of blood and laugh himself senseless on the bathroom floor. He finds himself unable to make his presence known, and flees back to the bed.
Diving onto the mattress, Goku pulls the covers over his head, shaking with distress until sleep finally overtakes him.
TO BE CONTINUED