A/N Okay I have been thinking about this story and some others for a couple days and now I'm writing this chapter.
Dedication: This chapter is dedicated to a very very very very very good friend of mine Katie Howard- thanks for the review and thanks for reading my stories!
Thanks to everyone else who has read this story and kept me going with it. Hope I don't let anyone down as this story goes on. Please please review after reading the chapters I love to read them.
Chapter Ten:
Standing from the doorway in the kitchen she looked in on the living room. Everyone had ended up spending the night at her house, even Dr. Robbins and his family who had stopped by shortly after Brass. The guest bedroom was being taken up by her mother and Gil and Lindsey were all still asleep. They should be anyways it was only five in the morning. She was up due to morning sickness.
A smile graced her features as she looked over the people on the floor. Ellie, who ended up being the lovely lady Greg was telling everyone about, lay sideways in his arms head resting against his shoulder. Mia was laying the same with Warrick; all four had small smiles on there faces. Sara lay on her side with her back to Nick's chest, who had his arm wrapped around her waist. They too were smiling as were Brittney and Matt who laid the same way. Brass took up the couch snoring away. Dr. Robbins took up the chair holding his wife's hand in the chair placed next to it, the very ones she and Grissom sat in when working.
The Robbins children, most in their twenties, were scattered about on the floor, some taking up the hallway. Her eyes searched the room for Jonathen. Not finding him she furrowed her brow. 'Oh yes he is sleeping on the floor in Lindsey's room,' she reminded herself. After she woke up and finished in the bathroom, and brushing her teeth, she had checked on her daughter. Lying on the floor was Jonathen. Lindsey laid on the bed a picture of him on the dresser above his head smiling. She remembered taking the picture. Lindsey had been dancing and Jonathen was watching her performance with a large smile. He had told three people already that was his girlfriend. It was a perfect picture that she took surprising him.
Her mother had been sleeping sprawled out on her bed also snoring. To her surprise the room was filled with photo albums and a picture of her on the bedside table in Grissom's arms. Lindsey had taken the picture, unknown to the love birds, while they were kissing in the sunset of Paris. It made her happy to know her mom approved of this marriage. Now all she had to do was either get her dad to approve, which she doubted he would, or get someone to play father.
Sighing she placed her hand on her stomach. "We got ourselves a problem," she whispered. No one stirred. "We need a daddy for me. She didn't notice Lindsey standing in the doorway of the hallway watching her. "Sam would never approve of Grissom. Brass would be ... weird. Al is just the same age," a single tear rolled down her cheek. "There goes my perfect wedding."
"Not if I can help it," Lindsey thought to herself walking back to her room where John sat on the bed waiting. They had been talking when they heard her mom coming down the hall and took their sleeping places. After she passed Lindsey went to go spy. For thirty minutes she was silently watching everyone sleep and then talked. Lindsey sat next to him head cast down. "Mom's perfect wedding is gone."
"What," he whispered lifting her chin.
"Its Sam," she said looking him in the eye.
"Basterd Grandfather," he smiled at the little laugh she gave. "What is it he has done?"
"Nothing it's what she thinks he will do," she leaned into him head resting on his shoulder. His arm wrapped around her waist and he pulled her close. The two fell backwards onto the bed happy to be alone in each others arms. "She is trying to find a 'father' to walk her down the aisle. I know he did it when mommy married dad but she doesn't think he would approve of daddy."
He laughed slightly. He had grown use to her referring to Grissom as daddy and Eddie as dad. When he asked about it she explained that daddy seemed more loving then dad and she really loved Grissom. He knew that didn't mean she didn't love her real dad but just loves him more. Turning his head he looked at her. "Maybe he would."
"He wouldn't," she smiled. "He isn't one of daddy's biggest fans."
"I am," he said shrugging. "You love him. Catherine loves him. Your Grandma approves of him. Why wouldn't he. He is her father. And what does every father want."
"For there little girls to be happy," she laughed shacking her head. "Mommy and Sam don't get along."
"Let's just try calling him," he suggested.
Catherine was out on the front porch when the limo pulled up into the long U shaped driveway stopping in front of her door. It was now seven and still everyone was asleep. She groaned lowering the glass of water onto the table next to her. Standing she fought back the sudden burst of nausea. "Great I get to throw up on him," she muttered to herself as Sam Braun exited the limo. He made his way slowly up the path to her house. When he reached her she cocked in eyebrow in question. "Yes Sam?"
"Let's take this inside," he said as his limo pulled out. "I'm sure it will be awhile till we finish."
"Fine," she rolled her eyes picking up the glass and opening the door to enter. She didn't notice her daughter and John at the bottom of the stairs listening and watching.
"What do you want Sam," she snapped silently. "And please be quiet people are sleeping."
"As I can see," he said not even lowering his voice. She turned in the doorway to the kitchen glaring at him. "I see you have become friends with two of my employees. Does Mr. Grissom approve of that?"
"He too is friends with them," she replied walking into the kitchen. "Would you like anything to drink?" Looking at his shocked look she sighed. "We may not be on the best of terms but this is my house and you are my guest. I know how to be a good host."
"Well in that case," he thought for a moment. "Coffee with a pinch of vodka."
"Okay," she started up the coffee maker. He gave her and odd look as she refilled her cup of water. "Catherine Willows drinking water for breakfast instead of coffee. Now what could possibly make her do that?"
"Triplets," she said pouring his coffee. Adding the vodka she gave him the cup and leaned against the counter. He stood in the doorway sipping the coffee. "What do you want?"
"Triplets," he asked surprised. "I didn't know you had a boyfriend let alone a fiancé."
"I didn't inform ... what?"
"I heard you are getting married," he said with no feelings what so ever. "And no not from gossip or from employees," he pointed back to the married couple.
"What you heard is correct."
"I wouldn't expect the people who told me to lie."
"People?"
"Will get to that later," he sat. "Now I wish to discuss why you didn't tell me."
"Because I knew you would disapprove of him." She said surprised she could still never lie to him.
"And why is that because I dislike Mr. Grissom?"
"How ... never mind," her eyes found Lindsey and she narrowed them.
"Takes after her mother," he smiled slightly. "Nice big house you got here. Not enough guest rooms?"
"Plenty but when people stay up talking they tend to fall asleep where they talk," she said. "Would you approve of him?"
"If he makes you happy, yes. That is all I wish for you. To be happy," he looked at her surprised face. "Just because I never told you I was your father didn't mean I wouldn't act like one if need be. I never actually approved of Eddie yet he made you happy so I played the role of father at your wedding. If need be I will do it all again for Mr. Grissom."
"Really?" She sat slightly shocked. Lindsey had entered the kitchen smiling. "You really would approve of him?"
"After awhile," he replied. "As I said earlier I dislike him. Trust is earned not given."
"Trust can be broken," she replied voice cold. Matt entered.
"Yo Cath got some yogurt?"
"Bottom self in fridge," she said. He went a grabbed one. "Matt can you go disturb Grissom for me."
"Sure you want me to do that? Last time I disturbed him I got a black eye."
"Fine. Lindsey go wake Gil," she said. Lindsey smiled happily sprinting for the stairs. Matt went after her to see how John was doing. Ten minutes later she heard Grissom coming down the stairs and stood in the doorway blocking his view of Sam.
"Catherine you better have a damn good reason for send your daughter to wake me," he grumbled trying to get past her. She continued to block his path. Sam watched from behind her. "Catherine will you please move out of my way I smell coffee."
"Of course you smell coffee I made it."
"You shouldn't be drinking coffee."
"I'm not ... Sam is."
"Sam? As in Sam Braun? As in the man I greatly hate for making you cry for three hours? The man I rather not talk about at seven o'clock in the morning?"
"Yes that Sam," she nodded. He placed his hands on her waist and pulled her towards him.
"Should I dare ask why he is here," he placed a kiss on her lips.
"He knows we are engaged," she whispered.
"Just like her mother," Grissom laughed. "Sneaky kid you got."
"We got," she corrected. "I thought maybe ... well ... um ... well he is my dad and ... well I want a perfect marriage ... I know you hate him and wouldn't want him there but ... well a perfect marriage would mean that ... er ... uh ... well I was going to ask ..."
"Yes. Catherine what ever you want I will give you."
"You gave me it already," she replied deeply kissing him. A coughing sound made her spin in his arms. His hands moved over her stomach lightly holding her in place. "Uh ... hi."
"Forget I was here."
"No," the two said in unison.
"Grissom and Catherine kissing in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G," The living room sang. None heard their conversation and none knew Sam was in the kitchen, well except for Matt but he was eating his yogurt happily not paying attention.
"I'll kill them," Catherine spun around only to find Grissom in her path. "Gil move now."
"No."
"Do not mess with a pregnant lady!"
"Oh shit," Greg said. "Um ..."
"Breakfast will be ready in ten," Grissom said moving her out of his way and entering the kitchen. "Sam you will be joining us."
"What," Sam and Catherine said at the same time shocked.
"Well if he is to participate in the wedding he might as well get used to being around us. Seeing how he will be the grandfather of our kids."
"Did you hit your head," Catherine asked walking over and placing a hand on his forehead.
"No," he took her hand placing a kiss on it. "Just trying to keep you happy."
"Ah. Pregnant angry women not your type."
"You are my type," he replied. "Pregnant or not you are definitely my type."
"Oh really and why is that," she walked from the kitchen not allowing him to answer. "Lindsey, John start setting the table. Greg to make Gil happy you will remain alive ... for now."
"Thanks Gris," Greg called. Catherine laughed.
"Oh and guys Sam Braun will be joining us for breakfast," their were shocked looks all around. Lily entered.
"Did I hear that correctly Catherine?"
"Yes mother," she smiled giving her a hug.
"And where is he?"
"In the kitchen with Gil."
"You left the two together in a room full of knives. Are you insane?"
"No pregnant and nauseous," she said walking down the hallway and into the bathroom.
-7th month into Pregnancy-
Catherine sat alone in the break room. Her pregnancy had limited her work to paperwork only. Seeing how all her paperwork and Gil's were done she had begun to plan for baby names. Gil had taken to planning the wedding, and to her surprise it was all done. All she had to do was pick her brides maids, maid of honor, and get someone to walk her down the aisle. She had all those down. Lindsey would be her maid of honor (John Grissom's best man to make it fair), Sara, Brittney, Mia, and Ellie her bride maids. Their respective boyfriends/husbands taking their perspective places on the groom's side.
The doctor hadn't yet told her what each of the children would be, and wanting it to be a surprise, they didn't ask. All she knew was that the wedding would be taking place a couple months after her expected date, Gil only telling her that to calm her from being fat in a wedding. Of course she was getting more nervous by the minute as the dates grow closer. Turning the page in the book she came across a name that interested her.
'Maria,' she thought. "Maria," she said allowed smiling at the name. The only time someone saw her smile like that at the sound of a name was when they said Grissom, Gil, Lindsey, or anything nickname for those people. She wrote the name down on a sheet of paper under girls. "Maria Michelle Grissom," her smile grew so she wrote the rest of the name. Putting a star by it she smiled.
"That's beautiful," Nick said entering. Catherine looked up a bit shocked.
"Not what I would expect from a guy but thanks," she said placing a hand on her belly. "Hope there is a girl some where in their."
"Think Grissom could handle more girls Cath," he laughed slightly sitting down.
"Yeah well four boys and two girls doesn't seem fair," she replied laughing. He looked at the paper.
"How long have you been searching for names?"
"Um ... five months," she replied.
"You have one name down."
"It's the only one I liked," she snatched the paper away from him. "At least I didn't want to name one of them after Van Helsing."
"Grissom wanted to name one Van Helsing?"
"No Lindsey," she laughed.
"Go figure," Sara said entering. "Have you seen the movie? So many teenage girls were there I was going to scream."
"Catherine picked a girl name. Marie Michelle Grissom," Nick said.
"Aw that is so beautiful."
"Nick said that also," Catherine laughed slightly. "Don't you two have cases?"
"Finished them," Warrick said entering with Greg. They told them the name both saying it was good.
"I like Nick and Sara's reply," Catherine smirked slightly.
"What they say?" Greg asked.
"Well Sara said it was beautiful but Nick said that first," she smiled. "He's got a nice heart."
"Thanks," he rolled his eyes grabbing one of the other baby books on the table. Everyone grabbed one to help look. Grissom was now the only one still working a case.
"Timothy Grissom," Nick suggested.
"Um ... no," she shrugged not even smiling at it.
"Mary-Anne Grissom," Sara suggested. All was silent. She had a small smile but not a hug one.
"That could do," she wrote it down. After thirty minutes of searching they had found plenty of girl names but no boy names.
"Gilbert Anthony Grissom," Greg suggested staring at the ceiling.
"Junior," Catherine yelled smiling probably the largest smile they've ever seen. She wrote Junior down.
"What?"
"That's Grissom's full name coffee boy," she teased.
"It is?"
"Yeah," she laughed smiling.
"So Gilbert Anthony Grissom and a whole bunch of girls."
"Got a problem with that Rick," Sara asked.
"Damn Gris is one lucky man," Nick said receiving a smack from his girlfriend and one from Catherine.
"These are my children you are talking about."
"That's a lot of kids," Greg said. "Ouch! What was that for," He yelled rubbing the back of his head.
"It made me happy," Catherine said putting down the book.
"Didn't have to use a book did ya," he asked. "Not like I said you were fat. Ouch Cath that hurt," he yelled rubbing the side of his head.
"That was me," Grissom said smirking. "Don't call her fat again or I will kill you. She is lovely," he pecked her on the forehead. She had tears in her eyes. "Its okay baby I hurt him for you."
"I never said she was ugly. She is hot," everyone was silent then Greg sprinted from the room.
"Damn it is going to get interesting around here."
-Labor Day-
She had been alone in the break room when it happened. Mia had been the one to her rescue. Tears were streaming down her face as she realized how early it was. One entire month away from her actual expected date. Mia was screaming at people around trying to get help. She told her the ambulance was on its way as she put a couple pillows under her head. She told her everything would be okay. But nothing was registering. All she could think about was how early it was.
"Catherine!" Gil's voice registered louder then anything else. She was being lifted into the ambulance and she hadn't even noticed it.
"Gil!" She cried out in pain as another contraction came through.
"Sorry sir you can't come," said one of the paramedics.
"I'm the father," he yelled.
"Sorry sir. Were heading to Desert Palms," he shut the door and the ambulance pulled out.
"Gil!" Catherine continued to yell from inside the ambulance. "Gil," she whispered as she was being pushed into the hospital. Again voices were hardly heard as the tears continued to stream down her face. Her doctor was yelling orders and feeling her stomach.
"Ms. Willows," he called taking a hold of her hand. "Ms. Willows can you please answer me?"
"Gil," she cried softly. "Where is Gil?"
"He's on his way. We couldn't let him in the ambulance," he informed her. "Ms. Willows ..."
"There early," she cried softly screaming as another contraction came. Her hand tightened around his until the pain disappeared.
"I know Ms. Willows," he sounded sad. "I know."
"Gil," she cried seeing him running down the hall towards the room she was in. She could see the others behind him with Lindsey stopping. "Gil."
"He's here Catherine," the doctor moved.
"Oh sweety," Gil held onto her hand with both of his. "I'm here don't worry."
"Gil can I talk to you," The doctor said. They left her alone with two nurses. They stopped down the hall some. "One of the babies turned."
"But yesterday you said they had all turned. You told me that this could happen."
"The problem is that the first baby that seems to be coming is faced the right way. The second is the one that turned. It is possible we can do a normal labor with that one but it is also possible that we can't. It all depends. It is highly irregular for a normal labor when the baby is turned the wrong way. I am leaving it up to you on how you want this to play out. Now the paramedic that checked on the kids in the ambulance said the baby turned while on the way here. The question is why?"
"Like I should know," He yelled. "Just ... I can't ... how ... why now!" Tears streamed down his face. A scream down the hall caught his attention. "How am I supposed to tell her," he whispered. The doctor placed a hand on his shoulder just as he swayed.
"Steady now," he said motioning for a wheel chair. When it came Grissom fell right back into it unconscious. "Nurse please do a full check up on him."
"Yes sir," she said pushing the wheel chair down the hall. The doctor looked over at the small group of family watching.
"Sir its time," a nurse called from Catherine's room.
Exactly a day and a half later Catherine was asleep in her room after finally giving birth to the third child, a baby girl which came exactly a day after the first, a boy. The middle child was a small baby girl. Grissom had fainted due to malnutrition for the past three days and had had a full meal a couple minutes ago. Now he sat holding Catherine's hand apologizing for not being there for her. Lindsey was asleep on the bed next to her mom. Everyone else had fallen asleep in their seats. Five hours later Catherine woke to the doctor entering the room. Grissom had fallen asleep in the chair next to her.
"Can I see them," she asked softly. He bites his lip as he helped her from the bed. "Dr. Crowder what is it?" She asked in the wheel chair half way down the hall.
"I will tell you when we get their Catherine," The doctor said. Five minutes later they were outside of a large room. She was looking in on all of the premature babies. One crib was empty next to two others with name plates on them. Maria Michelle Grissom and Gilbert Anthony Grissom Junior.
"She died," she whispered. "The second one ... she died?"
"I'm sorry," he whispered. "Her heart stopped shortly after birth."
"Why?" She asked looking at the other two. "Why did it stopped?"
"Catherine you know how they say the baby always knows when their mother is upset?"
"Like a connection is formed while pregnant with them," she whispered.
"We know she turned in the ambulance and that's when her irregular heart beat started. We believe it's because she felt your need for Gil."
"So it's my fault?"
"No she has always been the weakest heart beat. But she had a healthy one," he sighed. "A thorough examination told us she had a heart problem. One we wouldn't have been able to cure without a heart transplant."
"So she would have died anyways," she whispered. "Can I ... can I see them?"
"Yes," he pushed her down to the doors and let her in. Handing her a blue gown he left her in between the two covered cribs.
"Nurse? Can I hold them," she asked. The nurse nodded walking over. She took out the boy and handed him to her. She cradled him in one arm and then Maria in the other. "Junior and Maria," a smile graced her lips.
"If you need me I'll be over there," The Nurse pointed over at the observation room. Tears rolled down her cheeks and fell onto the blankets holding the babies.
"Mary-Anne would have been perfect," she whispered. "Just like you two. Your sister. Your twin." Two small hands reached up brushing her cheeks she smiled. "Wiping mommy's tears away?"
Gil watched from the window as Catherine continued to hold their children. Lindsey stood in front of him the others behind him. Dr. Crowder had told them the news. Now they stood hear able to hear what she was saying.
"Mary-Anne had heart problems," she whispered. Then she remembered Lindsey and a smile graced her face. "Oh Lindsey will love you two so much. All she has been able to talk about is her ... twin siblings. Her three," more tears feel from her eyes and simultaneously Lindsey's. Grissom refused to let his fall wanting to remain strong. Sara was in tears and hugging Nick who too was crying. Warrick held Mia the two silently crying. Greg and Ellie were also crying and holding onto each other. Brass to everyone's surprise also had tears in their eyes.
"It was my fault you know," with that Grissom's tears fell. "She felt my need for your daddy. I wanted him so much she turned around refusing to come out. I killed your sister," she whispered looking up at the nurse who came and put the kids away. Dr. Crowder came in whispered something to her. She whispered something back and he nodded removing her from the room.
-One Month Later-
"Catherine," Grissom said from the doorway of the nursery. Ever since they had allowed the kids back she hadn't left their side in the nursery. She still blamed herself for Mary-Anne's death. The only time she had left the nursery was to go to the small funeral held for her. Then she was right back here. Everyone was stopping by more and more as the wedding date slowly came closer.
Lindsey too was depressed. Always alone in her room or with John somewhere. He was the only one now who could keep her happy for awhile. Gil couldn't even do it anymore. John was over more and more because of it and his parents didn't mind. Sara too was depressed at seeing her 'mother' upset. In fact he had once overheard her telling Nick she was crying because 'mom' was crying. Of course Nick replied he too was sad that 'mom' was said but still it bugged him. Sara had told him about her mom and he figured for her it was more. Yet he hadn't told Catherine.
"Sweety," he said entering. She looked up at him tears streaming down her face.
"He opened his eyes today," she said smiling. Maria had opened her eyes awhile ago and they were afraid he never would. The doctors and nurses told them that since they were premature they would most likely do things later then others. That was their first encounter with the late starting. "He has your blue eyes."
"And your hair," he whispered. "I want to talk to you ... about Sara."
"Is she okay," she sat up straight. He smiled.
"Fine," He confirmed kneeling in front of her. 'Mother like,' he thought to himself understanding why Sara would us her as a mother figure. 'Probably uses me as a father figure.' "It's just ... Catherine she looks at you as a mother."
"So do the others its no big deal."
"No Catherine the others don't look that far," he sighed. "Catherine she truly has replaced her mother with you. I overheard her talking to Nick one night when she was upset. She told him because mom was crying a lot."
"Well they all call me mom no big deal," she said brushing away the crying part.
"Catherine I've been thinking about it. And something she told me awhile back made me realize something."
"You lost me," she looked confused. He stood picking up Junior and putting him in his crib. He then took Maria and put her in hers. Kneeling back in front of her he took her hands. She looked at him confused. "Are you ... are you calling off ..."
"No sweetie I would never do that," he squeezed her hand for reassurance. "Catherine I want to tell you what she told me. First I'm going to remind you of the day she told me it. It was when she disrespected you and Ecklie referred to her as a loose cannon."
"You never told me why you didn't fire her?"
"Because of what she told me," he quickly told her the story Sara told him. She had more tears in her eyes. "I also remembered what she told Lindsey. About her not being you. I think she measures herself up to you like Lindsey or any daughter would to their mom. She wants you to approve of her Catherine."
"No she is just being like the others," she said. Though she was slowly beginning to understand Sara more. Who she was and why she was closed off. "It's nothing."
"Fine," he stood and left the room. Moments later Sara entered.
"Hey," she said walking over to Juniors crib. "Heard Junior opened his eyes today. Nicky is downstairs with everyone else. Gris is trying to get everything perfect for the wedding. You know where we stand what we wear. I find it funny that he picked out your dress."
"Won't let me see it though," Catherine replied watching as Sara picked up Junior and held him. She was looking at her and she continued to think about what Gil had just told her. "Sara ... um ... can we talk?"
"About," she asked turning around Jr. still in her arms. Catherine stood and put Jr. back in the crib. Then she walked out of the room surprising Sara who followed. They went into a room that Sara had never been in before. When she entered she was surprised to see that it was a large office. "Wow who's is this?"
"Mine," she said. "That door there leads to Lindsey's room. That one to the nursery. And that one to a bathroom. Grissom's office is in the bug house," she told her. "This was a large room and I liked it a lot. Lindsey thought it be nice to make into an office so I can easily check up on her and the babies if need be."
"Wow. How come we never saw it before? When you showed us the house you told everyone that it was locked when you first got it and you were getting a key made."
"I lied. Gil hasn't been in here before. Any door leading into here is locked so Lindsey hasn't seen it either. They saw it when nothing was in here but that was all. I had some things changed so it would be different to them. It is like a sanctuary for me. Like Gil has his office sanctuary and his bug house sanctuary. Well I too have my little sanctuaries. This one, my little house connected to the bughouse, and my office at work. But this is the one I go to most so of course it has more important things in it then anything else."
"Mrs. Piggy?" Sara asked pointing at the pig in a jar sitting on the bookshelf behind the desk. "Thought that was Gris's?"
"He gave it to me the first time he visited my office. Said it was always my favorite and truth be told it had been," she smiled. "Now it is a reminder of his hidden side. His way of showing he cared about me a lot and would miss me," she walked over to a dresser and pulled a thick book off the wall. Walking over she handed it to Sara. "A photo album."
"Of Lindsey," she noted the words 'Daughter' written on the front. Not getting a response she opened it to find a picture of herself there. "What?"
"When you first came to the lab I hated you," she informed. Sara cocked an eyebrow. "No hear me out. I hated you because Gil brought you in. I looked at you as competition. Then I realized something not as competition for his heart but for his approval. After awhile I realized that I was beginning to approve of you a lot. Every time you solved a case I was proud of you. If you did basically anything I would get a feeling of pride. Not like I do with Greg or Nicky or Warrick but another pride. A type I get when I see Lindsey do a play perfectly or dance perfectly."
"I'm lost?"
"Sara," she sat down in a chair. "I noticed that your crush on Gil wasn't a crush but a search for a father. And in away you looking at him as a father kind of made me feel like a ... mother."
"Really?" Sara's eyes grew large. "You've looked at me as a daughter?"
"Yes," she smiled. "He told me what you told him. About your mom. And what you told Nick a couple days ago about why you were sad."
"I'll kill him," she laughed slightly. "You huh ... don't think I'm weird?"
"No I think you're perfectly normal," she sighed. "Now it's my chance to share. Did ... did Dr. Crowder tell any of you why she died?"
"No he just said it happened. Why?"
"He told me and I asked him not to tell anyone the reason. My reason for asking that was because I didn't want anyone blaming me," she whispered.
"We heard you talking to Jr. and Maria but didn't understand what you meant."
"Well when I first went to get an ultrasound they told me she had a weak heart. Which is why I always was very careful. I never told anyone and neither did they since I asked for that. When I went into labor I panicked because I was early. When the paramedics wouldn't let Gil in the ambulance I panicked more calling out to him. Mary-Anne seemed to since that and ended up turning and her heart rate became irregular. Shortly after she was born her heart stopped. The doctor told me that she had a heart problem that could only be fixed by a transplant. If she hadn't turned she could have lived. Her heart could have lasted longer for another one and she would be here right now."
Sara sunk into a chair truly understanding her depression now. At first everyone just believed she blamed herself for the turn. No one knew of the heart problem. 'Oh god,' Sara thought thinking of how she would feel. A single tear strolled down her face as she looked at the now crying Catherine. The room was silent as were their tears. After thirty minutes of silence Sara spoke her voice barely audible.
"I do look at you as a mother. I looked at Mary-Anne as a sister," she said. "That's why it was hard for me to see you like this. I didn't understand why and I couldn't answer Lindsey's questions and that hurt me a lot. That was the real reason I was crying. But, Catherine, we don't know if she would have survived anyways. You can't blame yourself for something that was probably meant to happen."
"After my water broke it took twelve hours for them to decide if they wanted to be born. Junior took only six hours to be born. Maria took only thirty minutes. Mary-Anne took the longest time," she said her voice also barely audible. "I kept her from coming. She wanted to stay with me and wait for her daddy. She wouldn't budge."
"Neither would Lindsey," Sara smiled at Catherine's laugh. "I was told you were in labor with her for 48 hours?"
"Yeah," she laughed. "Damn it was funny. For a total of 24 hours she wouldn't budge. I was with Eddie when I went into labor and once he dropped me off here he left. Wouldn't budge until Gil got there. Then she would continue to change her mind. So for 24 more hours I dealt with her coming and then going back it and fighting my pushes. The whole time Gil was there for me. He fainted this time."
"He wasn't eating," she told her. "I forced him to eat so he could be there for you afterwards. We all made sure he was the first one by your side other then Lindsey."
"They say that it was most likely Maria who decided to come," she laughed. "Did you know Maria is a daddy's girl?"
"No. What about Junior he a daddy's boy or a mama's boy?"
"Lindsey boy," she laughed. "Gil says it fits perfectly. Lindsey is a mama's girl. Junior a Lindsey boy so the last one has to be for him."
"And the next?"
"Next?" Catherine's eyes widen. "There's go to be another."
"Don't you want another child?"
"Well ... yeah ... maybe ... probably not," she laughed. "Already old enough to be a grandmother."
"Please you're young," Sara laughed. "A Lindsey boy?"
"Obsessed with Lindsey. She came into the nursery once and held Maria. After she handed her over to Gil and took Junior from me he wouldn't release her. Does the same for me."
"Maybe he's a Willows lover? Kind of like his dad."
"Yeah that be great but then he would become a Grissom lover," she laughed slightly. "Be perfect huh? Nah I think it is just that he realizes who we are. I mean he knows Gil and all but he isn't so desperate to hang onto him as he is for me and Lindsey. Or me as much as Lindsey. I think maybe he wants to be around his older sister more then anything. Kind of like she wants to be around you."
"Really?"
"Yeah. Anytime she hears your coming over she is waiting and then she is with you the rest of the day. Ever notice that?"
"No I always figured it was because Nick or someone else was their also."
"Nah she looks at you as a sister," she smiled. "Want to see something?"
"Sure," she said. Catherine pressed a button under her desk and part of the wall moved to reveal a television screen.
"What are you guys rich?"
"You should see Gil's bank account. I don't think he ever took money out of it unless for his bugs or emergencies. Basically the same for me. Plus when Eddie died I got about a million bucks."
"Really?"
"Both of us did that after the divorce. One of the only things we actually agreed on. Of course it was for Lindsey's sake. In fact I haven't touched it since I got it. Money for her to go to college."
"Wow. That's ... a lot."
"She deserves it," she smiled pressing the button again. "I also have a safe in here for personnel files. Most of my paperwork is done at home now."
"Catherine," Sara smiled at her. "It's been thirty minutes since you cried last."
"And?"
"Normally you'll be crying ten minutes later. It's a good thing."
"Oh," she smiled. "I guess telling you why helped."
"Why wouldn't telling someone else help?"
"Because Lindsey would blame me. Gil would probably not even say anything for longer then you did. Nick and Warrick would try so quickly to soothe me that I wouldn't understand their own emotions. And Greg ... well he is just a kid in some ways. You though just said what you felt."
"Oh," she smiled. "Do you look at Greg as a son?"
"How could I not? Loud music, unusual clothing, odd behavior. He is a teenager at heart. Plus he calls me mom to the face."
"Right mom," Sara smirked.
"Um ... do the others ... pity me?"
"No," she furrowed her brow. "Is that why you never left the nursery?"
"Sorta ... yeah. Hate pity," she smiled. "You know where the weddings going to be right?"
"I won't tell."
"Please," she pouted. "Spoil me just once."
"You're spoiled enough with this house mom," she smirked standing. "Plus I promised dad I wouldn't tell mom where the wedding is located. Don't want to be the trouble maker do I?"
"Yes yes you do," she nodded her head.
"Come on Grissom's making dinner," Sara stopped at the door. "Wow in a while no one can refer to him as Grissom because both of you will be Grissom."
"Answering the phone will be fun," she replied walking out. "Let's get the kids," they entered the nursery. Catherine took Junior as Sara took Maria. When they got downstairs Maria quickly held her arms out for her dad while Junior held onto mom even though Lindsey was there.
"Becoming a mama's boy," Gil said smiling down at Lindsey.
"Oh shut up," Catherine said. "I mean be quiet."
"Mom you're alive," Lindsey said getting laughter. They all sat down at the large dining table and began to eat. Many times Catherine asked were the location of the wedding was but no on would tell. Lindsey who finished eating first went to play with her brother in sister in the living room. Then the topic changed to the lab.
"Ecklie has chosen to take an early retirement," Greg repeated what Gil just told everyone. "Seriously? No more Ecklie?"
"Correct," Grissom informed. "And the new Director has been looking for a new Assistant Director. With the Sheriff he came to a conclusion."
"Really? Days going to get it again?" Sara asked.
"No we are," he said looking straight at Catherine. Her forked stopped midway to her mouth.
"We," She said. "Who is we?"
"Grissom and Grissom," he said laughing slightly. "That's what ... um ... Mikey called us. Actually he specifically said, and I quote, 'Two Grissoms' one position' Odd but I thought it sounded good. You know Grissom and Grissom offices how may I help you?"
"So there would be two ADs," Nick asked. "Who would get swing and nights?"
"Well yes two ADs. Seeing how I'm not exactly a people person and she isn't well ... I guess you would say paperwork friendly. And we work well as a team they thought it be best. Plus they said since there would be two then one of us could be in the field while the other is not. Or both of us could if we work the same case. True we wouldn't work as many cases but if a bug case or a big blood splatter case came up we would be needed. Plus high profile cases they would want us on. And swing and nights would be turned into one and we think giving it to Warrick would be best."
"Why not me," Nick asked confused. "Or Sara."
"Because doing so would terminate your relationship and we wouldn't do that," he said. "Well I wouldn't. Catherine might if she got mad."
"I wouldn't. You said yes?"
"I said I would do it if you do it."
"So bigger income for the both of us. Could work in field. More paperwork. Can see every ones file. Hell yeah I'll do it," she said.
"AD Grissom and Grissom," Greg said. "God help us all."
A/N Ha-ha this is long. Yes I killed one of the babies. Don't hate me. Please please please review. The wedding will be next chapter and then maybe I'll end it. Review please and tell me what you think. I really really really don't care if you review and say you think this is all a bunch of crap and I should stop writing just review! I really do read all of them and I thank everyone for the nice reviews I have gotten or all the suggestions I have been given.