Chapter 22 – Drastic Means

The last thing Remus wanted was to see Harry hurt again, but at the moment there was no other chance. Remus knew that what Dumbledore had told them about the archway in the Death Chamber was true. Sirius had fallen through it, that meant Sirius was dead. Nobody had ever come back from behind the veil, and if there was no way to bring somebody back from there, then there was also no way to bring Sirius back. It was hard enough for Remus to accept, he knew that it would be even worse for Harry. The teenager missed his godfather far more than Remus had guessed over the past weeks. Remus would seek him out later, he would talk to him and see what he could do to make Harry feel better. If there was anything he could do at all. But for now he had the feeling that Dumbledore still had a thing or two he wanted to talk about.

"What do you suggest, Albus?"

Dumbledore looked at Remus and thought for a moment. "We would need to find out whether a bond between Sirius and you really exists. Only once we know that for sure we can think of what to do against its influence on you."

"Meaning?"

"There are ways to determine if two wizards are bound by such an extraordinary bond."

"And there are also ways to sever such a bond, if it really exists?"

Dumbledore looked at Remus, but didn't answer the question at first. Instead he got up from his chair and walked over to Fawkes' perch, stroking the phoenix absent-mindly. Fawkes was only a day or so before his burning day, but still Remus found a certain fascination in watching the magnificent bird.

"There are ways to sever such a bond", Dumbledore said at last. "There has to be a way to sever it, in case it really exists. But we're talking about rather drastic means here, so you will understand that I need to make sure the bond is really there before we start thinking about how to make it vanish."

Remus swallowed.

"Define drastic."

"Blood bonds - if that is what we are talking about here - exist for as long as both 'ends' of the bond are still alive, or in a state where the bond can be kept up."

Dumbledore didn't continue, but he didn't need to. Remus had understood.

"So if there is a blood bond between Sirius and me, and it still exists even though Sirius fell through the veil, then…"

"Then we'd have to kill you in order to sever it." Dumbledore smiled gently. "Or rather, we'd have to pretend to kill you in order to sever it. I'm sure Severus can produce something that could be of help, but I'm sure you'll understand now why I want to make sure that the bond exists first."

Remus thought it was a very far-fetched assumption that he'd drink a poison Severus Snape had brewed in the hope that the potions master would also provide the antidote for it, but that was something he would worry about when the time for it came. For now, there was another point that had him a little more worried.

"Then how do you suppose to find out if the bond really exists?"
Dumbledore stopped stroking Fawkes and walked back towards his chair again.

"Legilimency."

Remus immediately shook his head. "There has to be another way."

"I'm afraid there isn't, Remus."

"I won't have anybody snooping around in my mind. No offence meant, but that is something I just won't have."

"It's the only way to find out", Dumbledore said, not in the least fazed by Remus' harsh tone. "If a bond of that kind exists between Sirius and you, then the answer is somewhere within you, within your mind. Legilimency is the only way to find out. Your repeated dreaming about Sirius, your worrying the scar that could not be erased, all that are hints, but there is only one way to have certainty. And that is to search for the answer in your mind. It's something you yourself are unable to do in a conscious state of mind, and we'll have to make sure if your repeated dreaming about Sirius means that your mind is trying to do so at night."

"And I won't have anybody do it. Albus, I know that you only want to help, but there is a certain border which I won't allow anybody to cross. I don't want to have anybody searching around in my mind. There are certain parts of myself which I won't allow to be revealed to anybody."

"Not even to me?"

Remus looked firmly into Dumbledore's eyes. "Maybe especially not to you, Albus. I won't agree to that suggestion, and I trust you enough to believe that you won't do it without my agreement. There has to be another way. Or we simply have to try and sever the bond without knowing for sure whether it exists. But not like that."

Dumbledore shook his head.

"Remus, you know that I would not suggest something like that if I knew of another way to deal with what you're going through. But before I will allow you to take some kind of poison in order to betray your body into thinking that you're dead, I will make sure that there is indeed a bond we're trying to sever. I know that you're aware of the severity of what we're talking about just as well as I am. I don't suggest this to spite you, or to make your innermost thoughts public knowledge. I suggest this because it's the only possible chance I see of determining what is wrong with you. Legilimency isn't something the one it's performed on enjoys, naturally, but it's the only chance I see."

Remus stared at Dumbledore for a long moment, then he got up from his chair and restlessly began to pace up and down in front of the desk. Worst about the situation was that he knew that Albus was right. It didn't help him any, because if there was one thing he didn't want, then it was the thought of somebody snooping around in his mind. He had taken too many years to perfect the art of keeping his innermost thoughts and feelings to himself, he didn't know if he was ready to allow somebody to break his defences now. It was necessary, that realization had already set in, now the big question was whom Remus was willing to allow breaking his defences. The answer was scaringly easy to find.

"If Severus agrees to performing it, then my answer is yes."

Dumbledore nodded without further comment. Either he guessed Remus' reason for the decision or he merely accepted it without asking for further explanation.

"I will talk to him about it."

"Thank you."

Remus' voice was flat, he wasn't really thankful for the whole process Dumbledore was about to set in motion, but if there was one thing Remus had learned over the years, then it was accepting things when he was unable to change them.

There was nothing the two men still needed to talk about, so Remus courtly bade the headmaster goodbye and left the office. Like Harry, he had much he needed to think about.

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Later that day, it was already near evening, Dumbledore left his office and walked down the staircases and corridors until he had reached the Potion master's office in the dungeons. He knew that talking to Severus would not become easy, that the younger man would not very likely agree to his suggestion, but he had to try. Dumbledore thought he understood the reasons for Remus' condition that it had to be Severus performing Legilimency on him, not Dumbledore himself. Remus' refusal to accept Legilimency as a possibility to discover what was wrong with him had not surprised Dumbledore in the least. It was not something people generally felt comfortable with, to have somebody taking a look around in one's mind, poking through thoughts and memories the other was trying to hide. And sometimes it was far easier to accept somebody who was not in any way emotionally close doing it than the other way around. Dumbledore knew that there was no friendship lost between Remus and Severus, yet he indeed understood Remus' reasons for asking for Severus. If the Potions master came across something Remus would rather have him not see, then Remus knew how he had to deal with it. It would be a lot more difficult if something like that were to stand between Remus and Dumbledore. Though the question of amicability between Remus and Severus was a difficult one to answer, the two men had managed to find a middle-ground upon which to move during the past years. They weren't famous for their exchange of pleasantries, yet Dumbledore understood that something Remus considered a secret he didn't want anybody to see would not stand in between those two men as it would stand between Remus and Dumbledore himself.

Finally, Dumbledore reached the door to Snape's workroom and stopped, breathing in deeply once more before he took his next step. He knocked, and as Snape's court voice bade him to enter he opened the door and stepped in. The Potions master was standing behind his worktable, filling the contents of a cauldron into small flasks which - as Dumbledore knew - would soon be brought up into the hospital wing by a house elf.

"Good afternoon, Severus. Refilling Poppy's stock as I see?"

Snape barely looked up to acknowledge the headmaster's presence, then he focussed on filling the last remaining bottles.

"Good afternoon, Albus. Obviously, Madam Pomfrey expects all the students to come back sick, otherwise I can't explain all the potions against flu and Dragonpox she asked me to brew."

He put a stopper on the last bottle, waved his wand at a quill which immediately began to write labels onto the bottles, and then he stepped from behind his workbench and looked up.

"What brings you here, Albus?"

"I need to ask you a favour."

Not the slightest frown appeared on Snape's face, but after years of acquaintance - and above that, close friendship - with the man, Dumbledore knew that his last sentence must have astonished him quite a bit. Snape leaned back against his worktable and crossed his ankles.

"And what would that be?"

"It concerns Remus." Seeing that now there was a definite frown showing on Snape's face, Dumbledore quickly raised a hand to stop any comment before he had finished speaking. "Please listen to me first. I've had a long conversation with him this morning, with surprising results. I am not entirely sure, but there might be an explanation for his seizures, but I need your help to find that out for sure."

Snape still frowned, but he nodded at the headmaster. "I'm listening."

"There is the possibility that his seizures and collapses are directly linked to Sirius. I can't say for sure, but there is the strong possibility that Sirius and Remus have closed a blood-bond years ago, and if that is true, then this connection is still holding up. But before I suggest him to take any means, however, I need to be sure that this is really the case."

Snape only raised an eyebrow, but as Dumbledore didn't offer any further explanation on his part, he shook his head.

"No. If I guess correctly what you're asking of me, then the answer is no."

"It's the only way to be sure, Severus. The answer is there, right in Remus' mind, only he has no access to it himself. You know how difficult it is to truly detect a blood commitment. It takes a great skill in Legilimency to find that out."

Snape shook his head. "Then why me? Why not you?"

Dumbledore sighed and folded his hands in his lap. He seemed uncomfortable answering that question, and that astounded Snape a bit. Normally, Albus Dumbledore was a man who spoke his mind plainly.

"That is the difficult part about what I am to ask you. Remus was hesitant to agree to it, for one. And I would not force this upon him without his consent. I would not break his trust like that."

Snape sneered. "And you'd rather have me break that trust than you. The only problem about this idea is that Lupin won't be pleased to find out that it happened upon your suggestion. If it happens at all. And he will surely not think that I acted on my own volition."

"No, he won't assume that of you. And I would not have anything happen without Remus' consent, anyway. I have talked to him at length, and in the end he agreed with me that it needs to be done. He agreed to have it performed, and he explicitly asked that you are the one to do it, not me."

Snape snorted. "That is something I seriously doubt, Albus. In case you hadn't noticed, Lupin likes me just as little as I like him. If anything, he would surely entrust you to snoop around his mind, not me."

Dumbledore shook his head and stroke a hand through his beard.

"No, I think there you are mistaken. No matter how antagonistic the relationship between him and you might be, he respects you. He knows that you would only be searching for the bond, and that every other information you'd accidentally encounter would be safe with you."

Snape made an odd grunting sound in his throat. "The same would not apply to you?"

Dumbledore shrugged uncomfortably. "It would. But I'm worried that it would affect our relationship. You have an emotional distance towards him which I don't have, that is why I ask you to do it. That is why he wants you to be the one to do it. For Remus' sake, and for mine."

Snape stared down at his shoes for some long moments, then he looked up.

"If Lupin really agrees, I will do it. Under no other condition. And rest assured that I'll make sure he agrees."

"I have no intention to lie to you about it, Severus. I will talk to Remus again, then the three of us can see to the details. Thank you, Severus."

Snape nodded as Dumbledore got up from his chair and left the room. As soon as the door closed behind the headmaster, Snape sank back in his chair and leaned his face into his hands. He would do what Dumbledore asked of him, he would do nearly any favour Dumbledore asked of him, but he was not happy about it. Not happy at all. Emotional distance…of course he had an emotional distance towards Lupin! What a truly unnecessary thing to state. There were reasons why that emotional distance existed, and actually Snape didn't want to jeopardize it by digging himself through Lupin's mind. With a sigh, Snape picked up an unused quill from the desk and twirled it between his fingers. Be that as it may, he had given Dumbledore his word. He'd have to see what would come out of this now.

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Harry was pacing up and down the path that would lead him around the lake, as if undecided whether he wanted to get away from the castle or not. He could not believe it. He simply couldn't believe it!

There might be a bond between Remus and Sirius, there might be a connection that could mean that Sirius was not really dead, and all Dumbledore and Remus could come up with was how they could possibly cut that connection off! Who did they think they were? They couldn't just decide that, on a whiff, as if it was nothing more than the decision to cut off someone's hair! If Sirius was really alive, then they needed to try everything to get him back, they needed to search for any possible way to bring Sirius back!

Who gave them the right to make that decision? If there was a link between Sirius and Remus, it was something precious. It was a chance, a starting point, didn't they see that? Who did they think they were, deciding to kill Sirius off for good?

Dumbledore and Remus could not do that, they simply could not! He could not let them.

That was it, Harry realized, and quickly turned around to hurry back into the castle. He could not let them. And that meant he had to find a way to stop them from killing Sirius. He had to find a way to bring his godfather back before Dumbledore and Remus had the chance to do something. It would not be easy, Harry knew that, but he was more than willing to try.

He had no idea how he would manage to find something not even Dumbledore knew about, but if there was a chance that he'd find the answer here at Hogwarts, then it would be in the library. He needed to find out everything about blood oaths he could, maybe there was something the two adults had not considered. Yes, that was it. And if there was a way to bring Sirius back, then he would find it, Harry vowed.

Fortunately, he didn't meet anybody on his way up the stairs into the library. The only good thing about the Hogwarts library during summer was the absence of Mrs. Pince, the librarian. Otherwise, the room was too warm, the air too stale, and no opening of a window could bring relief. Harry didn't know what made the difference at school-time, but outside the holidays it was always rather comfortable here. But right now, Harry found it hard to focus on anything. Nobody aside from him was in any of the several rooms of the library, and the silence was far more unnerving than the occasional cough, whispered conversation, turning of a page and closing of a book which was the constant background noise when other students were using the library.

But Mrs. Pince's absence was not the only good thing about the holidays, come to think about it. The other good thing about the holidays was that nobody saw the need to guard the restricted section of the library. Normally, that area was locked and Madam Pince had an eye on everybody who only came too close to that section, but during the holidays that was not the case. Not that Harry was actually searching for something in the Restricted Section, but maybe later he'd need to search there. He would not give up his hope that there was still a chance to bring Sirius back. He only needed to find it.

But where to start searching?

Harry fetched the quills an parchment he had left here yesterday after finishing his homework, and went to the wooden box which contained Madam Pince's filing system for the library. Normally, only Madam Pince used it, but Harry knew her system well enough to find what he was searching for. It wasn't complicated to use a thematically filed catalogue, after all. His fingers sorted through the single cards until he had reached the stack that referred to blood. He quickly excluded magical creatures and the use of their blood in potion brewing, and he also guessed that the large number of books on vampires would not help him much. He could not say if any of the remaining books would be of much help, but he wrote down their titles with the intention to check each and every one of them if necessary. The list grew longer than he had imagined it would, in the end he had twenty-nine books listed on his roll of parchment. With a sigh he put the box with Madam Pince's catalogue away and carried his list over towards the shelves. He'd try to rule out the ones which were not in the restricted section first, he didn't expect to find anything in them anyway.

Fifteen minutes later Harry had scratched out twenty-two books on the list simply by looking at their index and table of contents. Most of them dealt with Potion brewing or magical creatures like the ones he had excluded earlier, only that the book titles didn't betray that fact immediately. That left seven books from the restricted section.

Despite the fact that nobody was there to reprimand him, Harry still felt like he was doing something forbidden as he opened the small lattice that separated the restricted section from the corridor and stepped into the aisles between the bookshelves. Fortunately, this section was not locked during the summer holidays, so there was nothing there to stop him. It took him longer to find the books he was searching for, and was more careful in pulling them out. Harry had only been to the restricted section once before, but that night-time experience during his first year had taught him that the books here sometimes didn't behave like books at all. He pulled out the books and carried them over to a table. Then he sat down, carefully opened the first one and began to leaf through it.

Half an hour later, he still had not found out anything. One of the books was written in a language he didn't even know, another was written with a brownish looking ink which sent shivers down Harry's spine. It looked as if blood was not only the topic the book dealt with. Harry had two more books left, and his hopes that he'd eventually find something were fading quickly. Maybe Remus was right and there simply was no other way. With a sigh he got up from his chair and stretched his stiff legs a little. He walked up and down the room for a couple of times, thinking about what he would do if those last two books didn't reveal anything useful, either. He let his gaze stray along the shelves he passed and thought that he might have started this from the entirely wrong angle. Maybe he had started his from a too specific angle, maybe he needed to broaden the range of what he was looking into. With newly determined steps he walked into the next room and up to the large shelf that covered one entire wall in the room. He had not used the Encyclopaedia Magica very often, but where to look for a general abstract on blood-oaths and maybe also for literature on the topic if not in there? Seventy-eight volumes of the Encyclopaedia Magica were on the shelf, and Harry ran his fingers along the spines of the books until he found the volume that covered the right letters and pulled it out. A small cloud of dust flew into his face and Harry quickly turned his head and suppressed his urge to sneeze. The book was huge and heavy, so Harry carried it over towards his table and put it down. Putting the ink-jar aside he made space and opened the book, leafing through the pages until he found the entry for 'blood'. His heart sank a bit, though, when he realized that the entire entry covered more than sixty pages. Well, he'd just have to work his way through it.

There was a general part about blood and its symbolic quality in wizarding history which Harry scanned, but not really read. It took him several minutes of reading to find what he was searching for.

"Blood-magic is one of the most resourceful yet also most incalculable branches of magic known to the wizarding world. Various branches of blood-magic are known, roughly split into the use of human or animal blood for magical purposes on the one hand and blood-bonds on the other. Due to its both unpredictable and highly dangerous qualities, the practice of using blood in magical performances and potions brewing has been banned for the most part with the Humanitarian Decree of 1879.

(1) Amongst the number of magical performances that require the need of human blood…"

Harry shook his head and started to flip through the pages. What followed this entry was a detailed account of rites, performances and potions that required the use of human blood. From what Harry grasped by simply skimming the pages, the principal concept behind all them was power, immortality, invulnerability and the like. Harry had his own experience on that matter, experience which he didn't particularly like to think about because they still had the power to make him start shaking. He didn't know whether he wanted to know any further details, so he read on until he found the paragraph he was really interested in.

"(2) Blood-bonds in all forms of their appearances are the strongest magical and emotional connections between wizards that are known to the magical world. Those connections are brought to life by two magical human beings who are not bound by family ties sharing a blood connection. Once such a blood-oath is closed between two wizards, it cannot be taken back again. The only way a blood-oath can be broken is the death of one of the involved wizards. There is no way to sever the connection other than death. While in existence, the influence of the blood-oath on the involved wizards…"

Harry breathed in deeply and read through the paragraph again. Death. If death was the only way to sever a blood-oath, then it meant that Sirius was not really dead, didn't it? If the blood bond between him and Remus still existed - and nobody had denied that so far - then Sirius could not be dead. But that again meant that the only way to cut the connection between Sirius and Remus would be…he forced himself to breathe. That couldn't be what Dumbledore and Remus were planning, could it? The only chance to save Remus from dying couldn't be to kill him, where would be the sense in that?

During his first years at Hogwarts, Harry had learned to trust Albus Dumbledore implicitly, to never doubt that he always knew what he was doing. And though that trust and the absolute belief in Dumbledore had somewhat faltered over the past year, Harry didn't think that his headmaster truly considered killing Remus as a possibility to cut the blood-connection. Then he could as well let the blood-oath's expected effects simply run their course. Harry shook his head and read on, desperately trying to find something in the Encyclopaedia that would shed a different light on all this. But instead, the only effect was that fragmented sentences whirled around in his head and only increased his confusion.

"…potential danger of a blood-bond lying in its ability to increase a wizard's own magical capacities…"

"…a close emotional connection is both condition and consequence of a willingly closed blood-bond…"

"Enforced blood connections (comp. Paragraph (1) for further details) hold different properties as willingly closed blood connections, as their intention is different…"

"…yet all blood connection have in common that they cannot be undone while both wizards involved are still alive…"

"…blood connections that served in an act of resurrection (comp. Paragraph (1) section III for further details) might have the consequence of a vital dependency between the wizards involved…"

"It is not uncommon to hear about a developing mental connection between wizards who share a blood-bond, yet it is no necessity…"

"…the closing of a blood bond can never be enforced except from the conditions laid out under paragraph (1)."

Harry leaned back in his chair with a sigh and rubbed his temples to stave off the headache. This wasn't helping him any, he needed something that told him explicitly how a blood bond worked, and how it could help him to bring Sirius back. He could rule out the entire paragraph (1) in the entry, as this dealt with the use of blood in potions. Of course there were also blood bonds mentioned, but those were not the kind of bond Sirius and Remus had. But the second paragraph had not helped him more, either. Blood bonds held up for as long as both wizards involved were still alive. So far, so good. But nowhere it said how to bring one of those wizards back from a place where no other living being could go to bring him back. Drat.

Harry bent forward again and skimmed the remaining entry about blood bonds, but nowhere it said anything about bringing somebody back from…well, from wherever they went after they fell through the veil. Harry sighed and snapped the book close, causing a small cloud of dust to wave up into the rays of sunlight that fell through the window.

Well, another approach. Harry put the two other books back into the restricted section, put the volume of the Encyclopaedia Magica back into its place and pulled out two other volumes. One that surely contain an entry on Grindelwald, the other that would tell him more about resurrection. Somewhere in between, he simply had to find something. He simply had to find something. If he only continued to search, he'd eventually find something. He just couldn't stop now.

The Grindelwald entry fortunately was not as long as the entry on blood had been, but still well beyond fifteen pages. Harry breathed in deeply and started to read, thinking that he could as well learn a bit from his seventh year curriculum already. It would give him the chance to skip History of Magic classes when Binns finally taught them about it, at the very least.

Twenty minutes later, Harry was none the wiser still. He had read the entire entry, but though of course Grindelwald's reign as Minister of Magic as well as the archway in the Death Chamber were mentioned, it didn't tell Harry anything about where people who fell through the veil went to. But Harry was not yet ready to give up. He closed the volume with the 'G's and picked up the one where he hoped to find an entry on resurrection. He found one, though it only consisted of a few words. Those words, however, sent a small chill down Harry's back.

"Resurrection, see à Necromancy, paragraph (2)"

Necromancy. Harry had heard of it before, if only vaguely. If he remembered correctly, it was the art of bringing back the dead. Harry didn't know any details about how it was performed, but he had the sudden image of hooded figures standing around a dug-out casket on a graveyard, murmuring spells and spilling the blood of a sacrificed animal. He shuddered. At least that had been his image of resurrection before the last summer. Now it was the image of hooded figures on a graveyard, standing around a cauldron, and instead of sacrificing an animal they were taking his own blood to resurrect Voldemort. Harry shuddered and had to get up from his chair. Only when he stood in front of the window and felt the sunlight shine onto his face did his chill subside slowly. He didn't like to think about that night, didn't like to think about Cedric's death or Voldemort's second rise. It was over, he could not change it anymore. He could only try his very best to stop Voldemort from hurting even more people like he had hurt him, and that he would do. It was the only thing he could do. But for that he needed help, he needed someone to rely on, somebody who would catch him if he fell. And that somebody was well beyond his reach right now, so Harry would have to bring him back.

Still on slightly wobbly legs, Harry walked back to the table and sat down again to read the entry.