Chapter 35 – Awakening

Harry felt like shit. It was not the most wonderful realisation upon waking up, but it was true. He was feeling like shit. Great. With a groan, he opened his eyes and tried to find out where he was. Without his glasses, everything was rather blurry around him, but the onslaught of white that greeted him upon opening his eyes could only mean one thing – he was in a hospital. Well, feeling like shit and being in a hospital, that combined pretty well. Now he only had to find out just where the connection was which had brought him here. The last he remembered was that he and Ron had locked Hermione in one of Filch's closet. Then they had taken that portkey to the Ministry of Magic…

Harry had never woken up this rapidly before. It all came back to him in a rush, and he desperately needed to find out what had happened after his memory broke off.

"Good morning, Harry", a soft voice beside him said, effectively interrupting his thoughts. Harry turned his head to the side and saw a brownish-blurry shape sitting next to his bed. Either his eyesight was getting worse or he was still far too dizzy, but he didn't recognise who it was. And he had problems in placing the voice. But eyesight…there was something about his eyesight, something he should remember, but what was it?

"My glasses…?"

"Right, just a moment." The blurry shape next to Harry moved around a little, then it came closer and Harry felt his glasses being slid onto his nose. He blinked a few times, then his vision cleared and he recognised the blurry brown shape to be Remus. His former teacher was sitting on the chair next to Harry's bed, a strange expression on his face. Compared to the weeks before, Remus looked rather good, though he didn't look particularly well yet. Actually, he looked better than the last time Harry had seen him, but he was still too pale, too thin and looked as if he had not gotten enough rest. Great, Harry thought upon this tumble of thoughts. Too confused to remember that he was wearing glasses, and now he was mentally rambling nonsense. Just great.

"What happened? Where am I?", Harry asked and tried to push himself up into a sitting position. Remus rummaged around on the bedside table and after a moment handed Harry a glass of water.

"We're at St. Mungo's", was all he said for the moment, taking care that Harry didn't spill the water. Harry drank greedily, only now realising that he was thirsty, extremely thirsty at that.

"Thank you. What happened?", Harry repeated, but the question died in his throat as he looked at Remus. There was something in his gaze that made Harry stop short, because he had never seen it in his ever-composed teacher before. Not even on the day when Harry had been shouting and yelling at him for thinking about cutting Sirius off. Though Harry could not quite discern just what kind of emotion it was that he was seeing in his former teacher's eyes.

"Are you angry?", Harry asked. Remus sighed deeply and crossed his legs.

"To be honest, I don't quite know what I am. Angry is certainly part of it, but not the overwhelming part. How are you feeling?"

Harry shrugged slightly. "Not overly well."

"Does anything hurt?"

Harry shook his head. "Not really. I just don't feel overly well. Tired, exhausted."

Remus nodded. "Exhaustion is something you can expect when you go and perform magic which could as well have killed you if you had kept it up for just a little longer."

Harry normally didn't lack the ability to find answers, especially in his own defence, but right now he simply could not think of anything to say in response to Remus' words.

"What…what happened last night? I…how did you and Professor Snape get there? What about Ron? Is everybody all right? Are you all right?"

Remus smiled softly and refilled Harry's water glass. "First of all, it was not yesterday. You have been unconscious for a bit more than two days, which is why you should get some liquid into you now." He pushed the glass into Harry's direction, and the teenager picked it up. "As for the rest of your questions, it's all been very confusing. I was unconscious as well until yesterday morning myself. As for what happened that night, for the most part, I can only give you a rough summary. Severus found Hermione in the closet in which Ron and you locked her in. By the way, it was not a very nice thing to do to a friend, and she is rather furious about it. I can imagine that she was worried about you, but now that you are awake, I think she'll mostly be angry. She told Severus where you had gone. Severus and I went to the Ministry as quickly as we could, but you had already begun. So Severus had to bring you back and finish what you started."

Harry swallowed hard, his heart doing a funny leap in his chest before it started beating at twice its former pace. "Define finish, please."

Remus sighed deeply. "You opened a portal to the world of the dead, Harry. Or rather, you started meddling with a half-open portal that was already there. That was something you could not control once you had set it in motion. Severus had to finish what you had started, meaning he had to try and complete the rite and close that portal again. Such a connection cannot be allowed to be kept open. Merlin only knows what could come through that portal."

Harry's eyes widened. "Complete the rite? Sirius is back? Does that mean that Sirius is back?"

His heart was beating fast in his throat, and he was about to swing his legs over the edge of the mattress and get up, but with bated breath he was still waiting for Remus' answer. A large part of him was hoping so strongly that Sirius was back, but another part of him was so afraid to have his hopes crushed for good with Remus' next words. Remus, however, was pulling his face into a slight grimace.

"It's a difficult question to answer, Harry. Physically, Sirius is back. Severus sent a note to Albus as soon as he got to know what you were about to do. Albus was in a meeting with Moody and Janus, and they immediately left towards London. Moody did what he could to keep everybody away from the Department of Mysteries. Albus told me that when they came to the Death Chamber, they found the archway destroyed. You and I were lying near the stone benches, and underneath the veil they found Severus and Sirius. Physically, Sirius is back and alive."

A huge smile stretched at the corners of Harry's mouth, but Remus quickly shook his head.

"I said physically. I don't want to worry you any further, but so far, that is all that can be said for sure. He hasn't woken up yet, and only when he does we can see what really happened to him."

Harry made move to get up from the bed, but Remus took him by the shoulders and pressed him back. Harry shook his head.

"But I want to see him. I need to see him, Remus."

Remus shook his head. "No, Harry. Nobody is allowed to see him at the moment. They didn't let me see him, either. He's in an intensive care ward, and only his healers are allowed to go in there. He isn't awake yet, and I don't know what condition he is in. I know that it's hard, but we'll have to wait and see what happens."

Harry leaned back in the pillows, but he didn't entirely relax. Sirius was back, that was the sole thought on his mind. Sirius was back. He had brought Sirius back. Well, from what Remus had said, actually Snape had brought Sirius back, but the main thing was that Sirius was back. All else would fall into place now, right? That was what Harry had thought in the beginning. Bringing Sirius back was the main thing, everything else would fall into place then. Only, it didn't seem as if everything would fall into place at the moment.

"But Sirius will be all right, won't he? He will recover?"

Remus breathed in deeply. "The healers aren't exactly talkative about Sirius. The Ministry is keeping the lid very tightly on his medical reports. His condition wasn't stable when he was brought here, that is all I know, and that only because Albus told me what happened when he arrived in the Death Chamber. Sirius was gone for over two months, that seemingly left his marks on his body as well. Give it a few days. He needs to wake up, then we will know more. I'm sorry, but I can't tell you anything else at the moment."

Harry nodded defeatedly. He still wanted nothing more than to go and see Sirius, convince himself that his godfather was really there, sit by his bedside until he woke up, but without knowing where Sirius really was, he'd have to search the whole hospital for him. And if the Ministry was involved as well, there might be no getting through to Sirius, anyway. But that was something that worried Harry, now that he thought about it. So far, the Ministry had never been very keen on treating Sirius well, and now that he was finally back, he was in the Ministry's hands? The very thing they had been trying to prevent for the past years?

"Why is Sirius here? Why not bring him somewhere safe?"
"Away from the Ministry, you mean?"

Harry nodded.

"For one, because he needed medical care after he was brought back from behind the veil. Albus brought Severus back to Hogwarts so that nobody would get to know what he had done in the Death Chamber, but bringing Sirius to Hogwarts wouldn't have been an alternative."

"Why not?"

"Madam Pomfrey is a very competent healer, do not doubt that. But what happened to Sirius is far beyond the realm of what she is used to dealing with. Sirius was obviously in need of constant medical care, twenty-four hours a day, and at a very high level. Something which St. Mungo's can provide a lot better than the Hogwarts infirmary. And I think it also has another reason why Albus didn't bring Sirius back to Hogwarts immediately."

Harry only hoped that it was a good reason. Whenever Sirius was concerned, Harry had learned the hard way that his own views differed strongly from Dumbledore's. He had not seen the old wizard lose any sleep over Sirius' untimely death, and he didn't quite know what the old wizard would think about Sirius' unexpected return.

"Which reason?"

"That the Ministry knew Sirius had fallen through the veil."

"Why did they know? When Ron and I came through the Auror Department, we saw that all of his pictures had managed from Kingsley's cubicle. At that time, I thought it only logical with Sirius being…well, with him being gone, but I didn't think about why the Ministry should even know."

Remus nodded. "Basically, they knew because he was seen when we came to the Department of Mysteries after you. Albus sent you back to Hogwarts, and afterwards he and the Minister conferred about what had happened. To my knowledge, Albus simply wanted to finally convince Minister Fudge that Voldemort had returned, that he could no longer deny that fact. Meanwhile, Aurors were investigating the scene, righting the damage, interviewing Ministry workers who had been on duty. Unfortunately, more than one person claimed to have seen Sirius in the building earlier that night. We were far too hurried to get into the Department of Mysteries to make absolutely sure that we were not seen. Now when Fudge heard that Sirius was seen in the Ministry that night, he immediately thought that he had come as part of Voldemort's Death Eaters. Albus told him what really happened, as he had told him many times before that Sirius was no Death Eater. Before, Fudge never listened to him. That night, for some reason, he chose to believe Albus. Probably in the light of Albus being right about Voldemort's return, probably because it could no longer hurt Fudge to admit that Albus was also right about Sirius. With him fallen through the veil, there was no need to admit that his imprisonment had been unjustified in the first place."

"There was no need to clear his name, Sirius was gone, and Fudge could give Kingsley and the other Aurors who were after Sirius something else to do", Harry added angrily. Remus nodded.

"Unfortunately, I think that is the explanation for the Minister's behaviour. He could call off the search for Sirius officially and use the manpower somewhere else. There was one short article in the Daily Prophet a few days after Sirius fell through the veil, I guess you haven't seen it."

Harry shook his head, and Remus continued.

"Basically, it only said that the public didn't need to worry about Sirius anymore, that he no longer posed a threat to the wizarding world. It didn't mention what happened to him – after all, the Minister didn't want anybody to know that there had been Death Eaters in the Department of Mysteries, or anything else of the details that happened that night. It didn't even mention that Sirius was dead, only that he no longer posed a threat, that he had been rendered harmless. There wasn't any following up on it, because the papers were busy enough printing the news about Voldemort's return. The search for Sirius of course was called off, Kingsley was put to other tasks. The problem is that now that Sirius is back, the only way to get his name cleared is through the Ministry."

"But how do they explain that Sirius is back? You said that Professor Snape will get into real trouble if anybody finds out what he did. So how does the Ministry explain that Sirius is back?"

Remus shrugged. "To be honest, I don't know. I haven't had much time to speak to Albus since I woke up, but I just hope there'll be a way. For now, it's good that the Minister can no longer brush all the doubts about Sirius' guilt off. There simply has to be a way of getting his name cleared as soon as he wakes up."

There was a slight note of doubt in Remus' voice. Maybe it wasn't doubt at all, Harry wasn't entirely sure, but it was some heavy feeling that belied the optimistic content of what he had just said. It sounded as if Remus didn't truly believe what he had just told Harry. But which part of it? The part about clearing Sirius' name? Or the part about Sirius waking up again? Maybe he was getting paranoid, but past experience had taught Harry that people around him had a tendency not to share everything they knew with him. At least not if there was no other choice.

"What is there that you don't tell me?"

Remus looked up at Harry. "Pardon?"

"I get the feeling that you're not telling me something."

Remus slowly shook his head. "I'm not keeping anything from you, Harry. It's just…", he smiled sadly and shook his head. "I have learned that often in life, things do not work out the way you want them to. Far too often, unfortunately. You have achieved a very good thing in bringing Sirius back, and that should be reason enough to be happy about it. Only, I get the feeling that this isn't over yet."

"What do you mean?"

"There is yet no telling what state Sirius will be in once he wakes up. There is no telling that the Minister will stick to what he said two months ago and believe that there was something fishy about Sirius' arrest. There is no guarantee that everything will work out. And for once in my life, I would very much like to have a guarantee. That would help to calm me immensely."

Harry could sympathise with that. Merlin, what he'd give to finally have a guarantee for his life to work out.

"But if nobody is allowed to know what Professor Snape did with the archway, how on earth is the Ministry supposed to explain that Sirius is back?"

Remus shrugged and spread his hands in front of his chest.

"If only I knew. Minister Fudge certainly will want to have an explanation for what happened, for what destroyed the archway and brought Sirius back. I don't know what an explanation which would not endanger you or Severus might look like, though. I only know that the Ministry will certainly not shed a tear over the destruction of the archway, though that doesn't mean they won't want an explanation for it. We'll just have to wait and see."

"Will they question me? After all, I had no business being in the Department that night. Neither had you."

"It might be, Harry. As I said, I simply don't know. We'll cross that bridge when we come to it, for now I don't think anything will happen today or tomorrow. I'll talk to Albus as soon as I can, maybe he knows more. He's the only one who at least has some contact with the Minister himself. As soon as I know anything, I'll tell you."

Harry nodded and leaned back in his bed. He didn't like having to wait for everything to resolve – or not to, come to think of that – but again he didn't have much choice in the matter. After a few long moments of silence, Harry noted that Remus was watching him intensely. He turned to look at his former teacher.

"Remus?"

Remus sighed and uncrossed his legs, only to re-cross them again a few seconds later.

"I'm very glad that Sirius is back. More than I can tell. Especially since it was something I had not even dared to hope for anymore."

Harry sensed that there was more to come. "But?"

"I know that I am not your guardian, or someone whose advice you have to heed, but did you just for one moment consider how incredibly stupid what you did was? How dangerous? I know that Severus told you not to research Necromancy because it was dangerous. I told you not to research Necromancy because it was dangerous. You promised me, Harry. And yet you use the first possibility to run away from Hogwarts, involve Ron into taking a portkey from his father to bring you to the Ministry to perform Necromancy. You lock Hermione into a broom closet, sneak around the Ministry in your invisibility cloak and break into the Department of Mysteries. You steal a book from Severus' private possessions, risk your life as well as Severus' and mine. You achieved a very good thing with what you did, but I can't even begin to tell you how reckless and foolish it was. How risky."

Remus' voice not gotten any louder as he spoke, but definitely sharper. His tone wasn't angry, but definitely serious, with very much authority in his voice. Harry didn't quite know how to respond. He had done all the things Remus had mentioned, yet he hadn't quite thought about it like that. He hadn't meant to risk anybody's life, he had wanted to save a life. Sirius' life. That had been important to him, more important than anything he had ever done in his life. And it had worked.

"I…I didn't want to risk anybody's life. It was only…I mean, you wanted to cut him off. I just couldn't let you cut him off, not if there was a chance to bring him back."

"Harry, we talked about this at length, didn't we? We talked about the reasons for the decision I made."

Harry nodded slowly. "Yes, we did. But that morning when you were feeling so bad that you were brought into the infirmary…I don't know. It all became so real suddenly. You wanted to cut him off the next day, and I simply couldn't let you do that. I couldn't let you cut him off."

Harry didn't know why there were tears shooting into his eyes, but he blinked them away and tried to get his bearings again. Remus looked at Harry, his hands folded in his lap, the expression on his face unreadable for the teenager.

"I'm not in any position to give you a lecture now, especially not after how glad I am that you miraculously managed to bring Sirius back. And though it might have sounded like it just now, I'm also not going to make accusations. But especially since I can imagine that you are more than happy that you managed to bring Sirius back. I just want you to keep in mind what you risked, because you risked a lot. And you cannot expect things to work out every time that you risk so much. So far, it always worked. But I wouldn't always rely on that."

"I had to do something", Harry said. "Nobody else was doing anything to bring Sirius back, everybody had already given him up, I just could not stand by and watch you cut him off. Nobody believed me, that was the sole reason why I had to take all those risks. You didn't believe that there was a way to bring Sirius back, but did you even spend some thought on the matter? Did you even for once contemplated my idea before you shrugged it off?"

Remus drew a deep breath, then he nodded. "Believe it or not, I did spend more than just one thought on what you proposed. And I came to the conclusion that as much bringing Sirius back was an aim worth achieving, it did not justify resorting to Necromancy. You should have known that."

Harry sat up straighter, his voice rising indignantly. "What should I have known? All I know is that everybody kept telling me that Necromancy is bad, keep your hands off it, and that I should know why. Sorry, but I don't know why. Maybe I should, but I just don't."

A moment of silence stretched over the room, longer than it would have been comfortable. Finally, Remus shook his head.

"You have spent more time researching Necromancy than you have probably spent on most of your summer assignments, and yet you have no idea what Necromancy really is? You must have stumbled upon its history, upon its dangers, and yet you paid no notice to them?"

"I didn't exactly have much time for those researches, and I wasn't researching Necromancy, I was searching for a way to bring Sirius back."

"And thusly didn't pay attention to anything else." Remus nodded. Earlier, when Harry had woken up, Harry had thought that Remus looked angry. Strangely, now he looked slightly amused. "Also, you find it hard to believe that sometimes fully educated wizards simply know better."

"I might not if they'd offer me an explanation for a change. I don't particularly like it when people tell me that they know better and just expect me to accept that."

"Point taken." Remus got up from his chair and walked over towards the window. He looked out for a moment, then went back so that he came to a stop at the foot end of the bed. "I thought I explained to you, but maybe you're right and I simply was not specific enough."

Harry shrugged. "Maybe. Maybe I should have seen it, but no matter what, I simply didn't. I understand that Necromancy is not everyday-magic, and that it's illegal. Illegal of course means 'keep your hands off', but if it's about bringing Sirius back, then sorry, I don't care about legal or not."

Remus nodded. "Even though the proverbial milk is long spilled, I should maybe remedy that I failed to explain the crucial point about why not to use Necromancy to you."

Harry nodded and settled back against the headboard. "All right."

Remus went up and down for a moment, as if searching for the right words, and then he started to speak in a tone of voice which Harry remembered only too well from the time Remus had still been teaching Defence Against the Dark Arts.

"There is a very definite border between life and death. Once it is crossed, there is no turning back, and everybody has to cross it once. Some people, like Sir Nick, leave an imprint of themselves on this side of the border, but that doesn't change anything about the basic principle. Sir Nick is still dead, the only difference is that he chose not to move on to whatever lies beyond the border. Everybody has to die once, and once somebody is dead, there is no bringing them back."

Harry opened his mouth to say something, but Remus looked at him and shook his head, as if he didn't want to be interrupted in his explanation.

"From an emotional perspective, people often die too soon, when it is not their time, when they are still needed in this world. Not that this would influence why some people die early, and some late in their lives. Nobody really knows what comes after death, the threshold between life and death is not something that can be crossed to and fro. Death is a definite ending, and once somebody is dead there is no way for a living person to bring them back."

"From the way you're saying it, there is no Necromancy at all."

Remus sighed and went over to the window, sightlessly staring out into the sky. "There is. Unfortunately there is. Necromancy is the exception to the rule, and Necromancers are the few people who have the inborn ability to cross the line between life and death. But that's not the point."

"Then what is the point?"

"The point is that not even a Necromancer can cross the line between life and death without taking risks. Nobody can just come a-knocking on death's door to claim somebody back. A Necromancer has to open a passage between the worlds, a space to pass through. And that means connecting two places which are meant to be strictly separated from each other, because they do not combine well. You cannot combine life and death in one realm, that just doesn't work. Death is the end of life. The archway is a portal between those worlds, a portal that is easier to open than creating one from scratch. Easier because it is already half-way open – Sirius could fall through it, but he could not come back out again. Half-way open, into one direction. Which is why you were able to set all this in motion without any talent at Necromancy at all. You wouldn't have been able to achieve anything if you didn't have the archway as a support. Such portals are dangerous because there is no telling what can come through it while it's open. There is no telling what will happen once something comes through such a portal. Take a look at Dementors. They come from the realm behind the veil, and look what they are able to do to people. It's dangerous to tamper around with that. And it's even more dangerous to pass through such a portal while it's open. Harry, you were attempting to cross the border between life and death. As a living human being, that is impossible. Had Severus not come and taken over, you'd have killed yourself."

He drew a deep breath, ran his hands through his hair and sunk down into his chair again, as if speaking had greatly exhausted him. He crossed his legs, ran his hands across his face and looked into Harry's eyes again.

"You were about to throw yourself head over heels into something that was too big for you to handle. Even for a Necromancer it's dangerous to cross that line towards the world of the dead. Living souls are not welcome there, they have no place amongst the dead. Which is why you – if you had managed to take this any further that night, or if Severus hadn't taken over the connection you created and thusly allowed you to come back – would not have come out of this alive. Only a Necromancer has the talent to go into the Netherworld and come back, and even for them it is not an easy procedure. What you did was too much already. You ventured farther than anybody with your lack of talent should have ventured and come back."

Harry raised an eyebrow. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"I'm not an expert, but I'd dare to say that without Severus' help, you wouldn't have been able to come back. Death isn't particularly picky, those who willingly cross its threshold cannot expect to come out of this alive again. You were about to cross a border which you should not have crossed. Merlin only knows what kind of consequences will come out of this."

"What do you mean?"

Remus exhaled deeply and began pacing at the foot end of Harry's bed again. "Maybe nothing. But it is possible that what you did will have consequences we're not yet aware of. It might not be over yet, I'll have to talk to Severus once he's up and about again, maybe he knows more. In any case, you should pay very close attention to anything out of the ordinary you might notice about yourself. We can't fully rely on the healers to find out. The healers here do not know what you did, obviously. Otherwise you'd be in a hell lot of problems, because undoubtedly the Ministry would get to know about it. They only know that you were a bystander in a magical accident, one that drained you remarkably. Which is basically what you're in need for treatment for – complete physical exhaustion. Thanks Merlin that nothing more happened to you. This could have ended differently. You could have died, Harry."

"But I didn't die."

"No, but that was nothing you had any influence on. You were well on the road to killing yourself, I want you to keep that in mind."

Harry drank his glass of water and put it on the bedside table. He didn't quite know how to respond to Remus' words.

Remus got up from his chair.

"I'll tell the healers that you are awake again, then I'm going to organise you a bite to eat. I'll be back in a few minutes."

"Thank you."

Remus vanished out of the room, and a few minutes later, a healer came into the room, wand at the ready. Harry sighed and leaned back against his pillows. One thing he had learned about healers during the past years – thanks to Madam Pomfrey: the more he cooperated, the sooner he'd get this over and done with.

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

Severus Snape had the probably most blazing headache of his entire life. That was the first thing he became aware of, at a time when he didn't even know where he was and what had happened. His memory was hazy, so he'd have to find out step by step. He obviously wasn't dead, because although concepts like heaven and eternal peace were something he had never believed in, he also didn't believe that death would be just that painful. Everything seemed to be aching, not only his head, but strangely he didn't feel as if he was seriously wounded. He knew what that felt like from prior experience, and it had felt differently. Not much less horrible, but different.

Where was he? He felt numb all over and couldn't feel all that much, but he was nearly sure that he was lying on a bed. At least he was feeling warm and comfortable, that alone counted for something. He couldn't hear anything except from the sound of somebody breathing beside him, and couldn't quite explain where the warm feeling on his forehead stemmed from.

He would have to open his eyes to find out more.

Slowly, he lifted one eyelid and then the other, grateful that it seemed to be late evening and the room he found himself in was dark. He didn't know if he could have dealt with bright light just now. His room, that was the first thing he became aware of. He was in his bedroom at Hogwarts, his private quarters to which nobody except from him had access. Nobody except from…

"Albus", he croaked out, knowing that the other person in the room could only be the headmaster.

"Severus, it's good to see you awake again."

Dumbledore removed his palm from Severus' forehead and lightened up a dimmed lamp on the bedside table. His face, when it came into Severus' view, was drawn and worried.

"How are you feeling?"

Severus tried to shrug, but under the thick blankets he could not be sure that he had managed. Judged from the pain in his shoulders, he had actually moved a bit.

"All right."

Dumbledore chuckled. "Severus, there is nobody here except from you and me. I know you don't like others to witness your moments of weakness, but right now you unfortunately are in a situation where you'll have to let me help you."

Severus remained silent, but as he saw the sly smile spread on the headmaster's face he knew that something was about to come.

"I could of course call Poppy down do examine you thoroughly."

"Call that bat and I'll not hesitate to curse first her and then you."

Dumbledore chuckled. "I doubt you would have enough strength to hold your wand at the moment. But if you don't want Poppy to look after you, then let's try this again. How are you feeling?"

"Horrible", Severus admitted truthfully. "Everything aches, my head most of all. I'm thirsty, and I don't feel as if I can move at all."

"Yes, you've exhausted yourself extremely with what you did. I can give you something against the pain. I imagine that the feeling of weakness will last for another couple of days, though. No surprise after what you did in the Death Chamber."

Severus closed his eyes and tried to remember. He didn't need to stress his brain very hard, the memories were there immediately, just as if they had been waiting for him to start thinking about it. He opened his eyes again as he felt gentle hands on his back and shoulder which were rising him up into a sitting position. Severus tried to sit up on his own, he didn't like the feeling of being completely helpless and depending on somebody else's help, but he had to realize that he was too weak. With surprising strength Dumbledore lifted Severus up into a sitting position and leaned him against his side. A goblet was pressed to his lips, and Severus trustfully opened his mouth and drank. Another clear sign of his physical weakness, that none of his natural sense of self-preservation kicked in at the moment, on the contrary, that he trustfully drank an unknown potion that was given to him. Even if it was Albus, normally he'd at least have asked what kind of potion that was.

"That potion should take care of you headache. Do you want something to drink?"
Severus nodded and patiently allowed the headmaster to rise another glass to his lips which he emptied greedily. As much as he wanted, he could not suppress a content sigh as Dumbledore helped him lie down again and pulled the blanket up over his shoulders. Fortunately, nobody else was there to witness this moment except from Albus. If somebody other than the headmaster would be here to see this, Severus would have to consider either murder or suicide as possibilities, depending on who the other witnesses were. The headmaster had been more than right in stating that he didn't like others to observe his moments of weakness. That had its reasons, experiences he'd rather have forgotten. But Albus had seen him in far worse conditions before, moments when he had needed the help of somebody else, and though Severus had minded each and every time that it had happened, those moments of weakness were not quite as bad if Albus witnessed them than if somebody else did.

"What happened, Albus?"

He noticed that his voice was not as raspy anymore now that he had drunk something. Small steps, but that was all the progress he could make at the moment.

"It's a long story, Severus. Maybe we should wait with going through it until you are better again."

Severus shook his head.

"What about Black? And Potter and Lupin?"

Dumbledore sighed.
"Harry and Remus are fine. They were both exhausted and needed medical attention, but I received word from St. Mungo's this morning that they are doing well. They're both up and about again."

"Black?"

"It was a dangerous thing to attempt, Severus. You are not sufficiently trained in what you did, you nearly killed yourself."

"I had no choice, Albus. It would have killed Potter otherwise. And once I was holding the connection alone, it wasn't possible to withdraw just like that. Did it work?"

A long pause followed, but Severus could not see Dumbledore's nod because he had his eyes closed again.

"Yes, it worked. The archway was destroyed, and under the veil we found Sirius and you. He hasn't woken up yet, and I haven't been to see him, but from what I told his condition is improving. He is in no life-threatening condition anymore. The rest remains to be seen."

Severus breathed in deeply a couple of times, already feeling consciousness fleeing. Trust Albus to give him a painkilling potion that would make him drowsy.

"Thank you."

Dumbledore placed his palm on Severus' forehead again.

"There is nothing you need to thank me for."

With a tremendous effort, Severus brought his own hand up to cover the headmaster's.
"I'm very well aware of what you did, Albus. Obviously, you didn't want me brought to St. Mungo's because an official investigation would have been the consequence. And as I'm not tied to a bed upstairs in the infirmary, I guess that Madam Pomfrey doesn't know anything about my condition, either. So that leaves only you. And judged from how exhausted you look, I know exactly what you did. Thank you."

Dumbledore nodded and squeezed Severus' hand.

"You're welcome, Severus. Just get some more rest, you need it."

Severus doubted that he could get sleep, much less restful sleep, at the moment, but he guessed that the potion Albus had given him would take care of that. So he merely nodded and closed his eyes, allowing the potion to take effect. He'd deal with the images of what had happened the night before at some later point. Not now. When he was ready for it. Maybe in a year or two. And before another thought had the chance to enter his mind, he fell asleep.