A/N: Thanks for the reviews, and for waiting for an update so long!
And about the toilet-stuff? This fic's is so far a cross-over with Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Ranma ½, and In Ranma ½, all the women from the Amazon village are named after a sanitary product, or the like.
Chapter 13 - Jealousy and the usual mayhem
By the time they made their camp, everyone was soaking wet. Ranma sneezed and Shampoo glared at her. Shampoo had not been happy to find out that her new Airen was half-woman.
Ares sat down on a moisture trunk of tree, his long black hair sticking to his face and neck, his clothes feeling amazingly heavy. Ares groaned as Fragrance massaged his shoulders.
"Mmnnh..." Ares let out, and Fragrance smiled. Shampoo glared at Fragrance.
That damn irritating Fragrance got a better husband than I did.
Shampoo grudgingly admitted to herself and almost said it out loud. She stopped herself at the last minute.
There is no way I'm letting her know she got a better husband.
Shampoo stretched her arms over her head, pushing her big chest almost on Ranma's face. Ranma stopped in mid-move. Fragrance sighted in defeat, looking down at her feet. Shampoo smirked.
Ares touched Fragrance's hand affectionally. He didn't like slutty women, and Shampoo just seemed to hit the mark. Fragrance smiled bitterly, not liking to be reminded of the size of her own chest. Ares sighted, before clicking his fingers.
"'Dite?" Ares asked, and suddenly there was a shimmer in the middle of the air.
"ahhhh... woah!" Aphrodite screeched as she stumbled. She looked around, and after spotting Ares, slammed her hand against Ares' cheek. She glared at Ares.
"Ares! What is this all about? I don't mind being called, because you are my beloved brother and all that, but do you have to call me here. It isn't safe to teleport around here!" Ares just raised an eyebrow.
"You do remember the talk we had about the dangerous magic in China that we should immediately take care of...?" Ares looked confused, or as much as his stony face would allow.
"Oh dear...well I guess that was just me and Daddy talking. You know he was quite mad because I gave you your memories back. You should have been 'Dumbledore's little golden boy' and defeated Voldemort, apparently... So anyway, he was quite mad at me first. But after I changed the subject so nicely to the enchanted springs in China, he agreed." Ares rolled his eyes.
"You really are 'daddy's girl', right Dite?" He asked. Shampoo, Ranma, Genma and Fragrance all looked confused at Ares who was talking in English to the amazingly beautiful woman that had just appeared out of thin air.
"Why of course I am. That is why I got the permission to keep pets. Now where is my new toy, Ares?" Aphrodite asked impatient, tapping her feet to the ground. Ares sighted before giving her a black piglet, which was squeaking alarmed. Aphrodite took the piglet, disgusted.
"Oh, Ar. You know I don't like piglets, or their caretakers. I mean surely there was that love affair with that peasant in the twelweth century, but you can't really blame me now can you? I mean he was absolutely gorgeous! He had these huge muscles and this angular face, and his black hair reached all the way down to his lower back. Besides, he did say the smith promised to take him as an apprentice, so we really can't call him a peasant can we?" Aphrodite rambled off, trying to justify her former actions. Ares groaned. When Aphrodite started, she just couldn't stop going on and on about her men.
"Yes yes, but that is actually a poor young man who fell on the cursed springs." Ares interrupted before Aphrodite could start going rambling about her other men. It would take an eternity, as there were hundreds. Aphrodite snapped her tongue.
"And this 'young man' wouldn't happen to be just some poor farmer you picked up on the way here? I still remember two hundred years ago when you brought to me that poor boy you had picked from the road on your way here. I remember how jealous Spike got. He was the love of my life, you know...?" Aphrodite snapped in her out-going way.
"What was Spike's name before he got turned, anyway?" Ares asked. Aphrodite shrugged.
"How should I know...? I'm not his keeper." Ares rolled his eyes. He did that lot.
"So... why did you call me here anyway?" Aphrodite inquired.
"To give you my gift of course. Though... There is a slight favour I wanted to ask..." The god started, while the goddess just crossed her arms under her breasts and looked sour.
"What do you want, Ares?" She snapped irritated. Now, almost at all times Aphrodite was an all-smiling-and-pleasant-goddess, but when she god mad, there was really no stopping her.
"Well, you see, there is this man..." Ares started to explain his plan, and by the end of it Aphrodite was grinning maniacally.
"Oh! This is going to be so much fun!"
Severus Snape snape threw the lime green sock against the nearest tree in rage. The sock only flew couple of feets, Making the man even more forious, as he really, really wanted to smash something right now.
Dumbledore is so going to get it!
Snape looked at his surroundings and noticed he was in a jungle of some kind. He noticed several springs nearby and rubbed his eyes furiously, trying to relieve his growing headache.
He neared the spring, noticing a tingle making it's way along his back as he neared the springs. He kneeled by the closest one and was just about to reach to take a mouthful of the refreshing loooking liquid when a perky voice made itself known just behind his back.
"Hi there! How may I help you?" The goddess asked, making Snape freeze and then stumble into the spring he had been leaning over. With a huge splash the man fell on the spring.
"..oh... did I do that...?" Aphrodite enquired curiously, waiting fo the man to reach the surface. A dark form neared the surface as the shape broke the surface of the lake, gasping for breath.
Aphrodite looked at the pink rabbit in confusion and then did the only things she could thing of;
She squeled in delight.