Sorry about the long wait, I procrastinate on everything. Including homework. Which explains why I have a B- in Spanish…

So here ya go.

Bright and not necessarily early the next morning, Haldir could be found pacing the floor of his tidy little talan while his other, and much less mature brother Rúmil amusedly observed his progress from his unobtrusive perch upon a shelf. He had taken care to sneak into Haldir's bedroom before dawn in hopes of drilling his dear older brother about what The Lady had wanted as soon as Haldir showed any signs of waking up. However, he had not yet gotten a chance to announce his presence.

When Haldir had woken up, he had immediately leapt out of bed and began walking back and forth across the floor, muttering to himself. So far, Rúmil had been able to pick up the words "Lady…" "Uruk-hai," "Elves," and "What in Eru WAS she thinking?"

Deciding enough was enough; Rúmil decided it was high time to end Haldir's ramblings. "Haldir!" he called cheerfully.

Haldir jumped. Rúmil chucked to himself. The big bad march warden was skittish… Tucking this piece of information away for future blackmail, he called out again. "Haldir!"

This time, the high-strung Haldir was able to locate him. "Why," he asked forcefully, "Do my brothers seem to think that I have forgotten my name? What do you want? And WHY are you in my talan?"

"Ahh, Haldir," mused Rúmil. "All the friends you would make if only you were more polite…"

"YOU are the one who is being impolite," snapped Haldir. "I might remind you that it is you who has intruded upon my talan, not the other way around. Now answer my question, why are you here?"

"To ask you why the Lady wanted to speak to you," said Rúmil with a cheeky grin.

Haldir scowled. "It is not any of your business."

Rúmil hopped down from the shelf and joined Haldir in the middle of the floor. "I'm your brother, Haldir," he said reasonably. "Of course it's my business."

"No it is not," countered Haldir. He spun on his heel and resumed pacing, giving Rúmil a wide berth. Rúmil followed him.

"I don't understand why you can't tell me," he pouted, though of course, he hadn't really expected Haldir to give him an answer. Haldir came to a dead stop mid-stride, causing Rúmil to crash into him.

"Get OUT of my talan!" bellowed Haldir. His voice reverberated off the walls, making his brother's pointy ears twitch.

Rúmil gave him an innocent smile. "Make me," he said pleasantly.

"As you wish," returned Haldir angrily. With that, he tackled Rúmil, sending them both sprawling across the floor in an untidy heap of blonde braids and stray appendages. Rúmil struggled against the chokehold that was suddenly upon him, and was rewarded with a tightening of the arms around his neck.

Desperate to free himself, Rúmil brought his leg around and kneed Haldir in the stomach. The arms loosened, and he took advantage of his brother's brief incapacitation to free himself and flip Haldir onto his back. A moment later, Rúmil had the upper hand and was sitting on Haldir's chest, pinning his arms to the ground,

"Now," he said briskly, bringing his face and inch away from his brother's. "Tell me what she said." Just as Haldir opened his mouth to reply, a gentle knock sounded at the door. "Come in," snapped Rúmil without looking up.

A tall elf stepped elegantly into the room, his blue eyes locked onto the two brothers on the floor in front of him. "Am I interrupting something?" he asked uneasily.

"No!" Haldir gasped. "What is it?"

"The Lady wishes to speak with you," came the response.

"Again?' despaired Haldir. "She wants to see me again?"

"Yes again," said the messenger, bowing. "I will take my leave." With another bow, he hastily exited the room.

Haldir shoved at Rúmil. "Get off me," he snarled. Reluctantly, his brother rolled off and allowed him up.

" I suppose this means you won't be telling when what The Lady said to you last night," he said.

"No, I shall not." Said Haldir, running a hand through his messy blonde hair. "I need to bathe. I already appeared before her unpresentable once, I cannot allow that to happen again."

"Why did you not bathe last night?" asked Rúmil.

"Because I was tired. I had been on patrol."

"Oh yes," said Rúmil sarcastically, rolling his eyes. "And we all know how exhausting border patrols can be these days. All those orcs! When was the last time you saw an orc, Haldir?"

"Three weeks ago," admitted Haldir. "But that's not the point, I need to wash."

"I believe the bathing chamber is over there," said Rúmil, pointing to a door on the other side of the room.

"It's my talan, Rúmil, I know where it is."

"Then go wash already!"

Haldir went and washed, closing the door firmly behind him. Rúmil absentmindedly strolled around the small room and examined Haldir's belongings. He didn't have much. Needless to say, poor Rúmil got very bored very soon. It didn't help that Haldir was taking his sweet time having a bath.

"Haldir?" Rúmil called. "You're taking an awfully long time."

"I was very dirty," said Haldir dryly. "When one is dirty, it is necessary to take greater care when bathing."

"Oh, do you need any help?"

"NO!" screeched Haldir.

Lame place to end, but whatever.

I am very busy with school, therefore updates will not be regular, so if anyone wants to write this with me, let me know. I am very uncreative and this story needs help. We could start with putting band-aids over the big ugly plot holed that seem to have materialized from somewhere…

The Lady of Light: First off, I HATE Galadriel. I hate Arwen too. I hate how the movies portrayed both of them. So forgive me if I hyperbolize all their faults. Galadriel will be ugly and stupid and slow and however else she appeared to you. I was going to have her dramatically tell Haldir about his mission, then say, "shut up and go already," but I didn't think that would work.

I KNOW that I have big ugly plot holes concerning the creation of orcs/Uruk-hai. The quote from Saruman was taken directly from the movie, I'm too lazy to see it it's in the books or not. I also looked up Uruk-hai in the book about weapons and warfare of LOTR. I kind of made up my own thing to make my not-so-brilliant story work.

Don't get me wrong, I loved getting your review, I wanted criticism. I hope it's slightly better now.

TheSilverFeatheredRaven: Yeah, humans had things similar to hairspray and curling irons; only they had different names, which I don't know. So I called them curling irons and hairspray. I don't like Galadriel, I think she's ugly, so I get to make fun of her.

Itarilde Seregon: It's so fun to make fun of Galadriel…

Twilla: I really like Haldir, but I haven't found many good stories about him. I hope mine's okay.

I Estel vinta amarbarenna lomeo A Duath: You have a really really really long pen name. (duh) What does it mean?