author: carla, aka cali-chan
rating: PG-13, because of some swearing... Can't be helped,
since there will be people calling Ed "short" once in a while. Rating might
go up to R, though, depending on my mood when writing later chapters.
genre: AU, romance, a bit drama, really cheap humor XD
canon: manga ONLY!
pairings: EdoWin, RoyAi. Hughes will definitely be gushing about
his wife a lot...
summary: AU, chaptered, high-school themed, but not your usual
sweet-valley high school fanfic. Edward Elric has to become the best track
runner there is, for his mother, for his brother, and for everyone else
in his life. But will triumph come at a high cost?
in this chapter: winry tries to deal with the fact that she's going to be left behind.
Chapter 7: Not quite the Five Stages
Winry wondered why it was that lately she was spending all her Saturdays at school. It was the one day she could actually get some rest, have some fun; but no, she always wound up inside Leizenburgh Secondary all over again. It was quite pathetic, really, for she knew all the reasons she had for coming to school on a Saturday had a common denominator, and it was exactly the one she was trying not to think about.
Feeling depressed all over again, she veered off that topic, choosing to focus instead on opening the door of the School Library. She walked in without so much as a glance around, found a table directly in front of the Librarian's desk, and plopped down on a chair, looking expectantly up at twhere the Librarian should be sitting.
There was no one there, but she could hear sounds so she figured someone might be in the back room. Besides, she knew she would be there; there was nothing this particular Librarian loved more than being surrounded by books-- it was definitely much more than just a job to her. It actually took a while for the woman to come in, and when she did, she was carrying a stack of books so tall that she couldn't see what was in front of her; for that reason, she didn't notice Winry sitting there. She started piling the books on the desk, muttering to herself as she did so, and it wasn't until she reached to find a pencil that she saw the pair of big blue eyes focused on her every move. She had yelped and jumped back before she could stop herself; the pile of books fell, completely out of ordered, and she saw them fell she muttered a loud "Oh Crap!"
She bent to pick up the books and then turned to Winry. "Don't DO that! You scared me half to death!" Schiezka exclaimed, adjusting her glasses on the bridge of her nose. That was when she noticed that her friend seemed to be getting sadder by the second. "Winry? What's wrong?"
The blond girl seemed to be really interested in her nails; however, her face wasn't looking any brighter. "Nothing."
Schiezka looked back at her, hands on her hips, in disbelief. She knew Winry like the palm of her hand and clearly she had to have some sort of problem.
Schiezka was only a couple of years older than Winry. She'd also attended Leizenburgh Secondary in her time but they didn't really meet until Schiezka got a job as the School Librarian-- one day Winry had come looking for an Anatomy book and they started chatting, and hit it off immediately. From the outside they probably looked like a horribly mismatched pair, what with Winry being pretty and popular and Schiezka being as nerdy as a girl could get. But if you looked deeper you'd see that they really understood each other and it was a great relief for both of them: Winry needed a girl friend after being surrounded by testosterone for so long; and Schiezka had never really had a true friend before, if you didn't count books. They met at exactly the right moment.
Schiezka moved to sit beside Winry as the blonde's attention moved from her nails to an imaginary loose thread in her skirt. "Now, I think we both know that 'Nothing' has a name."
Winry's mouth turned in annoyance that she could be read so easily, but she did not look up. Schiezka sighed. "What did that doofus say to you this time? Whatever it was, I'm sure he didn't mean it, you know he just doesn't think before he speaks..." She knew that whenever Winry came up to her in this state, it was almost certain that it had something to do with a certain blond-haired best friend of hers.
Winry interrupted her with a light shake of her head. "He's leaving," she sentenced in a very quiet tone, looking up at her friend with liquid eyes.
Schiezka frowned. So it did have something to do with Edward. But leaving? Where? She didn't understand. "You mean for the Regionals? Well, yeah, he always travels for competitions, it's not like he doesn't take you with him and Al..."
"No," she shook her head again. "This past week a Recruiter from the Track & Field Federation came to see him run and they're going to sign him up as a State-sponsored runner. He's going to get a chance to run in the World Championship. But he has to go to Central... so he and Al are leaving on July 1st."
Schiezka finally understood. "Oh, Winry, I'm so sorry..."
"No, no, I shouldn't be feeling this way..." Winry said forcefully, as she stood up. There was clearly more to her blues than just sadness. "I feel so wretched; this is the chance of a lifetime! I should be happy for him. And I was! I was so happy! And when they left this morning on the train, I just... it just dawned on me. He's-- they're BOTH leaving. And I'm staying here. I'll be left behind," she said, hugging herself. Her conscience was eating at her; what kind of a friend was she? She should be supportive and here she was, thinking only of herself. But she couldn't help it...
She sighed as she leaned against the Librarian's desk. She'd known the Elrics her whole life; heck, she could easily say there wasn't a day in her life that she hadn't seen Edward. And Al was always trailing behind them ever since he'd learned how to walk. It felt strange, whenever she didn't see them for most of the day-- like today, for example-- so she couldn't even begin to imagine how it would feel not to see them for months. They were the one constant in her life, they were always together... they walked to and from school together, they ate lunch together in the cafeteria, they did their homework together... they had the same friends... gosh, in school they were seen as one unit, people just said "the Elrics" and everyone immediately assumed Winry was included! She just... she just couldn't imagine how it would be to do all those things without them.
Schiezka stood up and tried to comfort her. "Winry, I know how you feel about Ed, and it's going to be hard, but..."
"I don't feel-- I just-- It's not about that!" she exclaimed, blushing heavily against her will. Her sadness had nothing to do with having any kind of feelings for Edward-- it was SO not about that...
Or... maybe a little...
Ok, so she'd always thought of Ed as her sort-of unofficial boyfriend. Not that she'd ever thought about him like that, you know, like she like liked him-- because she really hadn't-- but it was more that besides her parents and grandmother, he was just the most important person in her life. That was a given. Al was right up there, but there were things that she just couldn't share with Al, whereas Ed was in her same grade and he just knew her since the day she was born, so everything came out natural with him. And, of course, she'd always figured she'd have a real boyfriend some day-- she really wanted to have one, at the very least-- but she just couldn't imagine any other boy being more important to her than Ed was. Wasn't that the definition of a boyfriend, someone you loved more than anyone else? Well, the two of them might not see eye to eye on everything (they certainly argued a lot), but Ed's place in her heart couldn't be taken by anyone else.
Maybe that was it. He was leaving and he was taking a part of her heart with him.
"It's just so unfair!" she huffed as she changed topics, really not wanting to go into feelings and stuff. She just knew that she was being left behind and she was going to be bored and-- and alone and-- with no one to talk to! "He's leaving and I only have, what? A week's notice? He's not going to be here for the Regionals! He's not going to be here for my birthday, he's not going to be here for Graduation, he's not even going to be here for the Festival of the Stars--"
"Well, it's not like you two ever do anything together for the Festival of the Stars," Schiezka rationalized, from her outside POV. Winry had moved past denial, now, and came into the anger stage, she thought clinically. Schiezka could probably be as neutral as possible without having her break down. "Or at least, not without Al--"
"--And I know while he's there he won't think about anything else but training, training, training!" Winry continued her tirade like she hadn't even heard her. "And they'll be jerks and won't even take time to write to me--"
"Well, Ed probably won't, but Al sure will--"
"--And the stupid moron will bust up his leg SO BADLY and I won't even be there to smack some sense into him and we'll all be miserable--"
"I'm pretty sure they have lots of great doctors in Central, Winry, especially within the Federation, they take quite good care of their athletes--"
"--And it's not like I can come up to the Recruiter Guy like 'Hi! I'm Winry and I'm not related to Edward at all but I want to go with them!' and just expect them to let me go and feed me and clothe me and put a roof over my head just like that--"
"Winry, you're turning blue..."
"--And why did they have to leave like this? And now!" She kicked the desk hard to convey her frustration and Schiezka jumped up.
"Hey, easy, this is a library after all--"
"It's just..." Winry took a deep breath. She had rambled on for so long, she almost felt like she had run a marathon herself. Her heart was beating a mile per second. She leaned against the desk again. "Maybe... maybe I should've taken more of an interest in running. If I had run like them, maybe I would be going with them right now."
"But you've always wanted to become a doctor, Winry. It's your dream; you can't force yourself to do something you don't like just for someone else," Schiezka stood up from her place, moving towards her. She pushed a blonde lock of hair out of her friend's eyes, and put a hand on her shoulder trying to comfort her. She looked so crestfallen; it just wasn't natural to see her so sad.
"I know..." her voice cracked and she looked down. "You know, maybe I can convince my Granny to let us move to Central. That way I could be closer to them, and I'm sure she'll agree because in Central there must be a lot of cars that need repairs, and her shop will be thriving..."
"She's never going to want to move," Schiezka said carefully. Winry had looked insanely hopeful for a minute there, but she didn't want her to feel better because she was filled with false hope. "She loves Leizenburgh too much. And even if she did agree to move, would you really leave this town and all your friends behind just because you want to be with them?"
"I would," she said, without hesitation. And deep down, Schiezka knew she would. Winry loved those two boys more than anything in the world, except perhaps her grandmother. And if she had a chance to keep her family together, she wouldn't care what she had to sacrifice for that chance. "But you're right," she finally conceded, shaking her head, "Granny will never agree. I'll just have to deal with the fact that they're leaving." She ran a hand through her hair, almost like she was nervous. "Gosh, this is going to be so hard and... different..."
"Come on, Winry," Schiezka tried to comfort her. It really tore her apart to see Winry like this-- the younger girl had always been the stronger of the two. Having her crumble down like this was only making Schiezka herself crumble, too. "You're not like this. Be happy; they're following their dreams and anyway, they'll only be gone for a little while! It's not like they're leaving forever..."
Winry nodded, taking a deep breath. "I know, I know. I'm being stupid." She looked up at Schiezka with all the determination of the world shining in her eyes. "Oh, this is pathetic. Since when did my life start to revolve around those two?"
"It's not that... you'll miss them, that's normal. Just don't let it get you down," Schiezka added.
Winry nodded again. "I won't. I'll just find other things to do. I'll go out, have some fun... I'll even get myself a boyfriend. They won't know what they're missing," she sentenced strongly. Schiezka had to laugh; that was certainly her happy friend coming back.
"I'll tell you what we'll do: I'll go put these books in place and then we can go, buy as much chocolate ice cream as we can find, rent a few movies and go back to my apartment. We'll have a girls' night in."
"Granny and I have to pick the boys up at the station at around three," Winry frowned. A movie night sounded just about right to lift her spirits up and it annoyed her that Ed and Al had to go deflate her mood again.
Schiezka thought about it. "Don't worry, I'll take you there. We can pick them up, drop them off at home and come back to my place. That way your Grandmother can go to bed early without any worries and we can still have our movie night."
"That sounds like a plan," Winry smiled at her. "Thanks for making me feel better, Schiezka," she hugged the older girl as a sign of gratitude. "I think I just really needed to vent out everything I was feeling."
"You don't have to thank me, that's what friends do," Schiezka hugged her back. "Now let's go get that ice cream!"
Winry laughed as Schiezka ran around organizing the books. "Sure! Lead the way!"
author's notes!--
well this was a pretty short and pointless chapter . but it's one i've been wanting to write for a while. Nothing like a hysterical woman when you're trying to do drama and humor at the same time XD
in the next chapter, we'll see the last few days of the elrics at leizenburgh. so it's back to school and you'll see other characters from the series come into play. lol, i'm just having so much fun with this...!
some replies to the reviews...
brickwall: let's just agree to disagree, ok? XD but feel free to bug me about anything, i like discussing my writing. there's a lot of the "him" thing again in this chapter, but by now y'all know who i'm referring to XP and yeah, ed did come to a decision, though i didn't really say it but you all knew that's what he was going to decide-- he's going to central. yeah.
lirincandy: a year? oh, that's nothing! i have fanfics that haven't been updated since 2001 #.# and they aren't discontinued or anything, they're just... sitting there... waiting... for inspiration to come by. i'm just a really slow writer, generally XD this one's really the exception, i can't believe i'm writing this fast.
the next one might take a while, people, because you see, my classes are EATING MY LIFE AWAY soooo... yeah, i really need to study right now. so please forgive me if i don't update right away. i'll try my best anyway.
keep reviewing guys! it makes me really happy when you tell me you're liking this fic so far :)