Disclaimer: Not mine. You REALLY think I'd be here if they were? No, I'd be off killing little kids! BWAHAHA…

Summary: Hermione and Severus have been set up one too many times. So, they plan on getting their revenge on the Hogwarts staff, but is that how fate will see it?

Warnings: Rated for a reason people! If you shouldn't, or don't want to be reading this, press the back button. Right. NOW.

Authors note: Hello my pretties! How are we all? All good I hope. Now, I like totally stole this idea from another fanfic, you should read it. But you'll have to find it for yourself, I forgot the name and author. Doop dee doo. So, basic plot is someone else's (curse them and their brilliant plot bunnies! All mine does is hump my leg!) but I changed the story line, so don't YELL at me. Okay, you can yell at me, but not too loud, I'm meant to be something called 'studying'. Peh. Studying.

Hermione, Severus and most other characters are very OOC. Don't blame me, they fit better that way.

So sit back and read the totally-not-mine-but-kinda-is-don't-yell-at-me-story. Hope you like.

(Now can someone PLEASE help me get this plot bunny off my leg!)

Chapter 8

ANNOUNCEMENT: (noun) A public statement about something that is happening or going to happen.

Hermione slammed the door to Snape's dungeon class room and stormed up the stairs. Only when she was at her office did she stop.

'Belladonna' she said the password to the portrait on her door, doing all she could NOT TO CRY.

The young princess in the picture gave her a wink and said 'Haven't seen you around here for a while. Didn't come back at all last night!' she put particular emphasis on the last word.

'I was… busy.' Said Hermione. 'Now, can I PLEASE get into my office? I have papers to grade.'

'Suuure, busy.' She winked again.

'Look, Mimi, I REALLY need to get in-' she was interrupted by a sob that had been threatening ever since she left Severus' office.

'Oh, Hermione, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to make you cry! I was just wondering about you and Severus, that's all!' Mimi said, a bit stunned.

'How- How do you know about me and Severus?' asked Hermione.

'Well, you know the portrait in Severus' lounge room? Well, the knight in that and I have been… y'know, together for a while now…' Mimi blushed.

'So… you were there last night!' asked Hermione.

Mimi grinned and nodded.

'W-What did you hear?' asked Hermione, startled.

'Well, I'm not into listening in on things like that!' answered Mimi, looking a bit disgusted.

'No, no, you misunderstood me. I meant, what did you hear us talking about?' explained Hermione. If Mimi had heard too much, their whole plan was ruined. Screw the students and house elves being big gossips; if the portraits got hold of news, it spread through the castle like wildfire.

'Um, not much. I heard you take off your clothes- in different rooms, I might add.' She gave Hermione a questioning look. 'Then Severus came back in, and you started throwing your clothes around. Then you went into Severus' room. After that, Graham distracted me.' Blushed Mimi.

'Graham?' asked Hermione in relief. SHIT, that was close. TOO close.

'The knight in the portrait. He's SO SEXY! I mean, he makes armour look good!' Mimi rambled on for some time, before Hermione interrupted her.

'He sounds like the real charmer.' Mimi nodded. 'But I really need to get those reports done, so if I could get in..?' she indicated the door.

'Oh, sure thing!' said Mimi, and the door swung open.

Hermione smiled at her and walked through the door.

And burst into tears.

'Why? Why did I go? I could have, SHOULD HAVE, stayed! I can't believe it. Now he won't talk to me. He'll go into one of his moods, and I won't be able…' she drifted into quiet ramblings, tears staining her cheeks.

A few minutes later, she got up, determined to get over it.

'I won't cry any more. What the hell, why am I crying about Snape anyway? I'm not crying because of Snape! I'm crying because of the plan. It's probably ruined.' Said an indignant voice in her head.

She told herself this over and over again. Maybe some day she'd believe it.

But for now, she had other things to do.

'SHIT!' she said, walking over to her desk. 'I left the music there. And the lyrics, as well as the stereo and MY CD! Urgh!'

There was nothing else for it. She was going to have to go there and get them. Shit.

But she could do that later. First she really DID have to mark those papers and write the reports.

Hours later, an owl flying through the window and landing on her desk interrupted Hermione. It dropped a letter and flew out, not stopping for a reply.

'Odd…' muttered Hermione, reaching over to grab it.

She opened it and sighed. Dumbledore.

Due to many questions regarding the Talent Contest, including the staff inclusion in it, I have deployed a letter to every staff member and house common room regarding details.

Any further queries should be sent to your Head of House.

The auditions for the semi-finals contest shall be held on the 17th of December in front of 5 staff members, yet to be chosen. The successful contestants (both student and staff) shall perform at the concert on the 24th, from 6pm til approximately 10pm. The audience of students and staff shall be given score cards, containing each contestant/s name and room to give a score (1-10).

The scores shall be tallied by the next morning, and the winners to go through to the final concert shall be announced at breakfast.

1 student/duet/group shall be chosen from each house to go through to the final concert, as well as one staff member/duet/group (please note: You can NOT perform the same item you did for your semi-final).

Students/staff wishing to enter the contest must write their names down on a form (you will receive from your Head of House) and return them to the entrants box at the front of the Grand Hall before the 15th of December.

Please be noted: All staff must enter in the competition. Also, should you choose to join with another/others in a group or duet performance, you will still be obliged to perform a solo 'talent'.

Kind Regards,

Headmaster Albus Dumbledore

'Oh god… That means, as well as our performance, I have to do my own one. Well, let's look into that, shall we…' sighed Hermione.

She duplicated her CD of all her favourite songs and started to play them (she had a stereo already in her class).

'Not popular… She will be loved? No, it's from a guys perspective… Teardrop is too sad… No, that's a guy as well… Hmmm, maybe this…' she muttered.

She skipped to number five and pressed play.

'Pieces of me, by Ashlee Simpson. I've always loved this song.' And with that, she began to sing.

'On a Monday I am waiting, by Tuesday I am fading, by Wednesday I can't sleep… When the phone rings I hear you, in the darkness there's a clear view that you've come to rescue me… Fall, with you I fall so fast. I can hardly catch my breath, I hope it lasts…' she sang.

'Oooh, it seems like I can finally rest my head on something real, I like the way that feels… Oooh, it's as if you know me better than I ever knew myself, I love how you can tell…'

'All the pieces, pieces, pieces of me… All the pieces, pieces, pieces of me…'

Unknowingly, her tears had begun again.

Oh brilliant. Just brilliant! Now I have to sing on my own, as well!' said Severus, frustrated.

You don't have to sing! Said an annoying voice.

Well, I can't do any magic, it's in the rules, and I went through all the other options this morning with Hermione.

Hermione. What will she sing? He knew one thing.

Whatever he sang could actually work to his advantage.

Scrap learning the song 'broken', he was going to learn a new one for this 'audition'.

And it was going to fit in perfectly…

Another shortie, I know, but at least this 1 was 4 pages.

But hey, I update regularly (don't I? Review and tell me whether it's regular enough!) so it doesn't really matter.

But if you do want me to update more often, or write longer chapters, YOU HAVE TO REVIEW!

NOW. NOW NOW NOW!

Well, several things have been brought to my attention by my beta-

Muggle electronics can't work in Hogwarts. Well, Hermione's smart, let's just pretend she worked a way around that. It's easier that way. TRUST ME.

The characters are very OOC. Screw you, I said they would be at the start, didn't I!

She was just wondering (my beta), since they are so OOC, where I got the ideas for them. Well, Severus I just kinda make up on the spot. But Hermione I vaguely base around me. The whole singing thing is like me, and her favourite songs are mine.

So there you go, hope that cleared a few things up.

Luv Y'all!

(review).