Disclaimer: Don't own them
A/N: Thanks to my beta Cybro
She walks alone in the darkness that was her life. Unable to trust people has been the greater part of her life. She didn't, doesn't, have anyone to turn to when her heart breaks into pieces. So there she stood alone as the cold rain covered her like a blanket. She watched the rest of the team enjoy the party, a party they didn't invite her to. She secretly wished she was in there with them. She wanted to be safe and warm with her colleagues. Suddenly her eyes locked on his. Her hand shook as she placed her hand on the window.
Grissom walked up to the window and placed his hand over hers. It was hell without her. All he wanted to do is hold her in his arms. His mind drifted to Sara. He loved her so much. He wished he could hold her, kiss her and let her know how much he needed her. Nobody knew he still talked to her. When he was alone, he would tell her his thoughts, whispers in the night that only she could hear. He dreamt of the day that they would be together, walking hand in hand for all eternity.
Nick and Warrick looked over at the window. Their hearts ached as they watched Grissom. They knew he was taking it hard. Sara not being there was hard on them all, some people more than others. They knew her not being here was making Grissom drift away from them; he seemed to have lost a part of himself. Everyday he seemed to be further and further away. They felt as if they were losing him, it was just a matter of time before they did. They soon noticed everyone in the room was looking at the window, watching and waiting for him to come back to them; but he would never get that chance.
In that moment Sara knew what to do; she knew why she never left. Her time here wasn't quiet finished. She was glad it would be her that did it; but in way she didn't want to. It scared her; she wondered how Grissom would take it when he found out. She couldn't wait until she was in his arms again. She didn't want it to happen this way, but fate was in the works. She turned away from what was now all their gazes. Then she walked away disappearing into the night.
Grissom stared, the once clear and beautiful night had started to cloud over; but for a moment there he could have sworn he saw Sara in the rain, looking lost, scared and cold. He knew he didn't though, he couldn't have. Her being there would go against everything he knew. He knew she wasn't coming to the party, though the party was for her. He wished she was going to be there, well, he wished there wasn't a need for the party in a first place. He wished a lot of things. Mostly all his wishes were about Sara, wishes he knew would never come true.
"Gil," Brass spoke softly as he touched Grissom's shoulder. He hated what this was doing to his friend. He wasn't the same since that night a week ago. "Gil, come on, we all are going to say a few words. Why don't you, come sit down?" He was growing concerned every minute. He couldn't get through to him. Nothing he tried worked. "You'll get passed this. In time it will hurt less and less you will see. Please go listen to the others, they are waiting for you." They both walked to away from the window, taking their seats.
Sara stood at the edge of the road. A few flowers still lay in that spot. She didn't remember what happened; only that afterward nobody talked to her when she was around. They all looked through her, like she wasn't there. Everyone ignored her, everyone but Grissom that is. She didn't understand why they were so upset with her. It was an accident that was all. It took a couple days until she knew the truth. She still didn't want to believe it. Believing it meant she would have to accept it, and accepting what she was going to do in just under a few hours. Tears overpowered her eyes as she fell to her knees. The rain, it still fell, it hadn't stopped falling since that night it seemed.
A photo lay among the flowers and cross. Her hands trembled as she reached for it. The captured memory in time was a joyous one. The fairy lights covered the wall from floor to ceiling. The soft glow they let off cast gentle light all around. Grissom held her in his arms, while looking deep in her eyes. The rest of the team stood around the couple with campaign glasses in their hands. It was a toast to a promise of a new beginning. A new beginning that ended up being short lived. It was a promise of a dream she held in his heart; though in the end it didn't come true.
As the team stood up one by one they spoke of fond memories captured in their hearts, Grissom glared at a photo in his wallet. Their words didn't reach him; they jumbled together and floated around the room. He didn't want to hear them anyway. Every memory they shared just reminded him what a wonderful life she left behind. Slowly all the colors in the room faded into nothing more than merely shadows. Shadows the loomed over him like a suffocating blackness of that night. A single tear fell onto the photo, deep in his heart was the guilt that it was his fault. He wished he would've made her stay five minutes longer. Five more minutes, that's all it would've taken.
Sara placed the photo back down. Her arms wrapped around herself in hopes to keep herself warm. She walked along the side of the road thinking about the accident. The night was rainy, cold, and darker than any night she'd ever seen. The darkness, the rain, 'why is that all I can remember?' She wanted to know how she came to be like she is now. She needed to know above anything else. For the first time she closed her eyes and waited for it to come to her.
It was a week ago that night. Sara and Grissom were supposed to a scene together. He was running late, and told her to go ahead without him. He surprised her when he took her hands tight in his. "Honey, I will be five minutes behind you." Then he kissed her. "I love you, drive safe."
Sara placed her fingers to her mouth. She didn't think about it at the time. The kiss was at work, in his office. That was something they never did at work. They didn't kiss or touch each other. Not that it would matter, everyone knew they were together. She strained her mind to think of what happened next.
Sara was driving along. The road was dark, too dark for Vegas. The rain drops were falling faster than the wipers could expel them from the windshield. She came around the corner when she saw the child. He couldn't have been more that eight years old. He was alone looking frightened. When her eyes met his she swerved to miss him. The pavement was to wet and she lost control, sending the car into a rolling ball of fire; but only after ejecting her body from its interior. Her broken body landed hard against the shoulder of the road. Her blood being swept away as the rain cascaded on her. As she drifted in and out she thought about Grissom.
She didn't know how long she had been there, she slowly let go. The last thing she heard was the cries of the boy saying he was sorry he made her crash, then heavy footing on the pavement. A shadow loomed over her, as the figure got closer her eyes cleared. It was Warrick. She gathered her strength to speak to him. "Rick."
Sara could tell he was trying to be strong. "Hey, stay still." He looked around like a frightened child who had just lost its mother. "I need a medic of here, NOW."
"I…it's…cold."
"Someone's coming. Stay with me okay?" He wanted to hold her but was scared to move her.
"Rick… tell… Grissom...please" Her breathing had started to slow, easing the pain she was in.
"Shhh, Sar, you can tell him yourself." He looked up as he felt the rain stop. "Hey look, Nicky is here."
Sara broke into a violent cough. "Rick…Ni…cky…tell…tell…Gris…I…lo…ve. I…love…him." Her eyes closed.
Nick and Warrick could hear to sirens coming but they knew they were too late. "Sar, please no…come on, wake up. Stay with us." Nick desperately tried to wake her up.
"Nicky, let her go." Warrick then lifted Sara up and held her as she slipped away.
Back at the party Grissom, Catherine, Nick, Warrick, Brass, and Greg were getting ready to go out the accident site, so they could say the final goodbye. Also they wanted to put out fresh flowers. Grissom couldn't take it any longer and walked out to his Denali, the picture still clasped tight in his hand. He would do anything to take back the night she died. He never told anyone why he blamed himself. How could he? They would all say it was an accident, but he knew it wasn't.
"Gil, wait up." Catherine was lost for words. She knew Grissom was blaming himself. She feared if he couldn't open up to anyone he would fade away. "Gil, I don't think you should drive alone. You're upset and…"
"And you're not, is that it Cath?"
"No…"
"I didn't think so. You never really liked her did you?"
"Gil, I was saying that I am upset, alright. Not like you though."
"Not like me…well you shouldn't be. You didn't kill her."
"You didn't kill her. It was an accident."
"I sent her alone. I should've made her stay. I was only going to take five more minutes. I should've made the kiss last longer. I should've walked her out." Grissom let his tears.
"Hey what's going on?" Warrick had asked as he along with Nick, Brass and Greg walked out with arms full of flowers.
"Nothing," Catherine said turning to face him. "Let's get these loaded."
Before they knew it, all the flowers had been loaded in all three vehicles. After much debate, it was decided Grissom would drive alone and be the lead car, behind them Catherine and Warrick would be next, followed by with Nick and Greg. Brass of course drove in front of Grissom as the police escort. They all slowly pulled away from the curb one by one, as the rain started to pour down.
Grissom's mind was clouded while he drove. He couldn't help but blame himself. No matter how many people told him it wasn't, he couldn't believe them. They didn't know the truth. He gripped the steering wheel harder as he thought back to that night.
Sara had walked into his office looking so beautiful to him. "Hey, we have a double." He handed her a piece of paper. He couldn't help but watch her as she read the paper. "Why don't you go ahead, I need to restock my kit."
"Are you sure? I don't mind waiting. With the weather it might be safer." Sara had had a bit of fear in her voice.
Grissom knew she hated bad storms, but instead of asking her to help him he walked over and took her hands. "Honey, I will be five minutes behind you." In that moment he didn't care about their agreement to keep their personal life out of the lab. He pulled her body to his and kissed her. Pulling away he looked into her eyes. "I love you, drive safe." He gave her smile and watched her leave.
Grissom hit the dash board with his fist. "Why, why her?" He couldn't control his crying. "It should've been me. Sara was so young and beautiful. Why do you take wonderful people like her out of this world? There's so much evil. My Sara, my beautiful Sara." It only got worse as they neared the site. He remembered when he found out Sara had died. It was the night a part of him died as well.
He had pulled up behind the police car. Everything was a blur as he walked up to Brass. He felt sick, something told him whatever happened it involved Sara. He went to move past Brass but was stopped. "Where is she Jim? Where's Sara?" He could see Nick and Warrick in the background. "Jim, I need to get to her."
"Gil,"Brass tried to form the words to tell him. "Her injures were too bad. I'm sorry, but she's gone."
Gone. What a funny word to describe someone being dead. Sara wasn't gone to him. He still felt her. Every moment since they said those words, he could feel her. So how could she be gone? He looked up and saw Brass had pulled over just a head of the cross that was jammed in the ground.
Then without warning a tire blew. Grissom over corrected sending his car flipping in the air. Pieces of metal flew in all directions. It slammed against the pavement, and then slid against to road. It came to rest on the same spot Sara had died.
Grissom opened his eyes and looked around, right away he could tell he was upside down. He undid his seatbelt and fell out of his seat. He was surprised it was easy to crawl out of the window. Dusting himself off as he stood up, he looked around. He walked over to the side of the road. "Sara."
Grissom's hands trembled as he reached out to touch her. Tears streamed down his face as his fingers made contact with her cheek. He pulled her into his arms and held her. "This is real right?" He pushed her back to look in her eyes. He forgot how he could get so lost in those eyes.
Sara's head rested on his shoulders. "Yes, Grissom this is real."
"Good," was all he said before he drew his lips to hers.
She pulled back crying harder than she had ever done before. Her head tilted up to the sky. The rain had stopped falling on her, finally. "You stopped the rain from falling on me."
He had no words for her. He just wanted her body close to his. As he held her body against his the sun started to rise. "Look at that." He released her body and they both looked as the sun started to rise.
"We should go now." She took his had and they walked together into the sun rise.
He stopped halfway down the road and looked back at the commotion. "Will they be ok?"
"They will be fine, in time." She gave him one more kiss before looking in his eyes one more time. "Look."
He pulled back while holding her hands tight. "When did this happen?"
"Just now."
The rest of the team couldn't believe what just happened. They had just lost another member of their team. As Grissom's body was pulled from the wreckage, they all watched the sun rise. They each secretly thought they saw Grissom and Sara. Her hair was in soft curls that framed her face, and the white dress she was in hugged her curves and flowed freely in the wind. Grissom was wearing a gorgeous white suit that matched Sara's dress.
They kissed each other again before they walked to eternity, together, their laughter echoing in the wind.
The End