Aoi Chapter 2: Cry to Heaven, an evangelion fanfic

Disclaimer: see part 1.

Aoi

Part 2

Cry to Heaven

By Random1377

"You're kidding me with this, right?" Touji Suzuhara was still dressed in a black suit and tie, and was most unamused with what the blonde in front of him was saying.

"Not even remotely," Ritsuko said coolly, "I'm dead serious."

"Poor choice of words…" the boy replied softly, visions of the funeral (less than three hours over) still fresh in his mind.

She sighed, "Look, I'm sorry," she began, rubbing the bridge of her nose, "he was a good person, and didn't deserve this… but I have to be concerned with the big picture right now, you know what I mean? There's a whole species relying on it."

Touji just stared at her for a moment, then closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "I have… a sister…" he began slowly, "she was injured in the first angel fight." He opened his eyes and met hers steadily, "I want her moved to a better hospital."

"Done," Ritsuko said without hesitation, "she'll have the best care available." She folded her hands and placed them on the desk in front of her, staring at them intently. "So I can count on you, then?"

He stared at the floor, remembering his first ride in Unit 01… and Shinji's wretched sobs after the angel had been beaten. It was the first time he had seen the boy as something other than, 'The jerk who hurt my sister.'

It had been the beginning of one of the best friendships he had ever had.

"Touji," Ritsuko said quietly, breaking his reverie, "you cannot imagine how important you are right now. An angel could attack any time, and as it stands Unit 01 is not usable. Of course we still have Rei and Asuka, and Units 02 and… 00," she paused, still not certain if 00 was operable, then pressed on, "but I don't want to take a chance on them not being enough. Do you?"

He shook his head slowly, "No…" he conceded, "of course not." He stood, turning away from her, "Alright… I'll do it."

She let out a faint, shuddering sigh of relief. Then stood also. "I'm glad to hear it," she said, producing a card from her pocket, "here's a temporary ID badge, just until we can get a permanent one. Report to NERV HQ tonight at five for a preliminary sync test and security debri-"

"Tomorrow…" he cut her off softly, "give me until tomorrow… ok?" he sighed, "Don't we owe him at least that much? Just one day to remember him?"

"We'll never forget him," Ritsuko replied just as softly, "but don't we owe it to him NOT to let up? To make sure that we're ready to defend the people that he cared for?" She paused for effect, "Isn't that what you would want?"

He clenched his eyes shut, biting back his initial reaction – involving the words 'cold', 'manipulative', and 'bitch' – and nodded. "Five o'clock," he said stiffly.

She said nothing as he walked from the room. –He'll never be my friend,- she thought, shaking her head.

She sighed and gathered her papers, then headed for her car… dreading her next task more than anything she had ever had to do.

Asuka lay on her bed, staring at the ceiling. –He's not dead,- she thought, rejecting the notion, -no way! There is just no way that that… that DOLL killed him!-

But no matter how her mind attacked it, the fact remained that Shinji was gone… and that Rei was the one who shot him. "That bitch!" she whispered, her voice shaking, "That little fucking BITCH! How could she… how could she?!?!"

She got off of her bed abruptly, pacing around her room. Her hands clenched and unclenched at her sides, unconsciously mimicking her late roommate. That Shinji's body was possessed by something else didn't matter to her… all that mattered was that he was gone – and that Rei had taken him.

"Not that I care," she whispered to herself, still wandering aimlessly around her room, "he was just an idiot anyway…"

She had refused to go to the funeral – flat out. 'No way!' she had told Misato when she called from the hospital, 'I am not going to that dork's funeral… not a chance!'

She jumped as the doorbell rang. Taking a deep breath to calm herself, she went to the front door. She blinked in surprise as she found Ritsuko there, still dressed in a somber black blouse and skirt combination.

"Asuka…" the blonde said, nodding slightly, "I… need to speak with you."

"What?" Asuka replied flatly, "If it's about Shinji, or my psyche report, I don't want to-"

"It is," Ritsuko cut her off, "and if you think for one minute that I want to be here telling you this, you're sorely mistaken." She sighed, "This is supposed to be Misato's duty, since she's your guardian – and his… but since she's still recovering…"

"What?" Asuka repeated, wishing only that the woman would leave. She did not want to be reminded of the Third Child – in any way. –I'm glad he's gone,- she thought angrily, -good riddance…- yet even the thought rang hollow.

"When the tenth angel attacked," Ritsuko said slowly, "Misato told you all to make a will." She paused, pulling out a small envelope. "At the time, you all refused, citing various reasons. Well, later, Shinji did submit one… and in it, it stipulated that you were to receive this letter."

Asuka stared at the envelope as if it was poisonous. "I don't want it…" she whispered, suddenly terrified.

Ritsuko said nothing; she simply stood still, holding the letter out to the redhead.

Asuka looked up at the doctor, her bottom lip trembling, "Why?" she whispered, swallowing hard, "Why did this happen?"

"I don't know, Asuka… the world doesn't make too much sense to me right now…" the blonde replied, gently taking the girl's hand and pressing the letter into it, "but I know that he wanted you to have this. What you do with it is up to you – lord knows I won't make you read it… but if it was me, I would want to know what it was that he couldn't tell me until he was gone."

Asuka looked at the letter for a moment, then asked softly, "What about the rest of his things… will they be trashed, or what?" The thought made her inexplicably ill.

Ritsuko shook her head, "His will said that all of his personal belongings were now Misato's, and that she had full control over what happened to them. Except for this letter and his SDAT player."

Asuka blinked, "His SDAT player?" she echoed, "Who did he give that to?"

Ritsuko looked at her watch, hiding the look of discomfort that passed over her features. "I have to get back to NERV," she said calmly, "you are off duty tonight, so just rest. Because tomorrow you have a full shift." Before the redhead could reply, she turned and walked away.

Asuka closed the door and sat down at the kitchen table. She guessed who the tape player had gone too, and fought the surge of anger that encouraged her to shred the letter and burn it.

Taking a deep breath, she whispered, "Ok, idiot… what was so important that you had to die to tell me?" She tore open the letter before she could think about it too much, and began reading.

Before she was finished, the apartment was filled with her anguished sobs…

"Ready to go?" Ritsuko's voice came to Touji as he sat in the locker room, staring at the blue and gray plugsuit that had been issued to him… and the 01 stenciled on the chest.

"Not quite," he called back, finally pulling the suit on, "give me two more minutes."

"Whenever you're ready," she called.

"Never, then?" he said, feeling vaguely ill as he pushed the button on the wrist of the suit to pressurize it. He sighed as he only got silence as a response. Slowly he walked to the door and opened it. "How do I look?" he asked the blonde.

Her voice was an odd mixture of pride and sorrow as she looked him up and down and replied, "Like a pilot…"

Before he could reply, she led him to the test room… where Unit 01 stood waiting.

"Normally," she said, leading him to the plug entry, "we would do this with a test plug… but this situation is not normal… and we need you ready as soon as possible, do you understand?" He nodded, and she gestured to the open plug.

As he sat down, looking over the cockpit, Maya Ibuki entered the room. "Sempai," she said, offering Ritsuko a clipboard, "here are the final results of the system tests." She noticed Touji looking at her curiously, "Hi," she said, smiling at him and extending her hand, "you must be Touji. I'm Maya Ibuki, it's nice to meet you."

Touji took her hand, smiling broadly. "Miss Ibuki," he said, bringing her hand up to his lips, "the pleasure is all mine." Ritsuko and Maya wore identical looks of shock as Touji kissed Maya's hand, "Shinji told me about you… but he never said you were so pretty…"

"Th-thank you…" Maya stammered, blushing furiously.

"Any time," Touji replied, allowing her to reclaim her hand, "any time at all…"

Maya excused herself and hurried to the command room.

"Mind telling me what that was about?" Ritsuko said, folding her arms over her chest and frowning slightly.

Touji waited unit the brown-haired tech was out of earshot before smiling and confessing, "Shinji really did tell me about her, Doctor Akagi… and he did tell me how pretty she was." Seeing the blonde's frown deepen, he flushed and hurried on, "He also told me that she seemed like she had really low self esteem… and that he was sure she didn't ever get compliments… and…" he trailed off, feeling like an idiot.

"So you felt it was your duty to make her feel better about herself, is that it?" Ritsuko said, "You, a fourteen year-old with no real-life experience."

"S-something like that…" Touji stammered, cursing himself for being so impulsive. "I… sorry… I'll apologize to her after the test."

Oddly, Ritsuko waved a hand. "Don't," she said flatly, "you're right, she does need it – though I would appreciate it if you would wait for more appropriate times. Five minutes before a crucial test is not the time I need my best tech to be flustered… understood?"

Touji nodded, closing his mouth (which had dropped open as the woman spoke) and saying, "I… of course… I understand completely."

"Good," Ritsuko said, turning from the plug and heading towards the command room. "Oh," she said, turning back to face him, "and it is to remain comments or casual contact only. Pat her on the shoulder, kiss her hand – hell, tickle her for all I care…" her eyes narrowed, "but it goes no further. I won't have a technician and a pilot in a physical relationship – is that clear?"

Touji was beet-red at the very thought. "I… no, I would never…" he took a deep breath, "clear… ma'am."

Ritsuko nodded and went into the command room, taking her place behind Maya. "Insert plug," she said calmly, pushing the conversation from her mind, "begin sync test."

Touji closed his eyes, forcing himself to inhale the amber liquid as it filled the plug. –Here goes…- he thought.

"Initiate first stage connection," Ritsuko said, forcing herself to breathe evenly.

Touji opened his eyes, and gasped in wonder as the sides of the entry plug went from slate gray to multi-colored as the Unit prepared for link-up.

"Second stage…" Ritsuko said tensely, watching the monitors for anything unusual.

Touji felt as if his limbs were getting heavier. –It's starting…- he thought, his heart racing, -one more stage…-

"Approaching absolute-borderline, all boards normal." Maya reported, "fifteen seconds until third stage."

As the countdown reached zero, Touji's mind was filled with blinding pain.

"Feedback!" Maya called out, "Unit 01 is rejecting the pilot…"

"Prepare to abort," Ritsuko said with a sigh, "it's not going to-"

"No!" Touji gasped, cutting her off, "Give me… one more minute…"

Maya's hand hovered over the abort button, waiting for a verdict from Ritsuko.

"How's his psycho-graph?" the blonde asked, a thoughtful look on her face as she clicked into scientist mode. –Never tested the threshold of a pilot,- she thought clinically, -might be interesting.-

"Umm," Maya checked the readout, "he's hurting… but he's not in danger, yet."

"You have your minute," Ritsuko said, "Maya… record ALL results… even the ones that look insignificant…" –If he cracks, I want to know exactly when… and why…-

-Come on, you stupid monster…- Touji thought, resisting the pain, -work!-

Thirty tense seconds passed… then Maya called, "Pulse feedback is increasing! Unit 01 is… it's trying to kill him!!"

Touji's scream confirmed this report, resounding through the control room.

"He's got twenty seconds," Ritsuko replied.

"SEMPAI!" Maya gasped.

Ritsuko ignored her underling and watched the readouts. –Fascinating!!- she thought, -Just fascinating… he's trying to fight it…-

Touji felt like his head might explode. "Come on!" he moaned, "Work for me…" –Hurts…- he thought, his heart palpitating, -but he wouldn't give up… he never gave up…- His mind flashed inexplicably back to the funeral… and the calm, restful face of his friend.

"GREEN!" Maya called out, "I've got green! Sync ratio at twenty-three percent and holding!"

Touji gasped as the pain abruptly vanished, slumping back in the seat and drawing deep breaths of LCL… trying not to sob.

"Touji," Ritsuko's voice came to him, "what's the last thing you thought before it synchronized?"

"I…" he gasped, shaking all over, "Shinji… I was thinking about Shinji…"

The blonde nodded, looking satisfied. "Proceed with standard sync test," she said coolly, making a note in her handheld computer.

"Standard?" Maya echoed, looking up at her superior.

"Yes," Ritsuko confirmed, "we won't have any more trouble."

Before her understudy could reply, the blonde turned and strode from the room. –No,- she thought, -now that she knows… I don't think we'll have any more trouble from her…-

((Ring))

((Click))

"Ikari."

"It's me. 01 is good to go… but…"

"Yes, doctor?"

"I… have reservations about the test on 00."

"Noted."

"I was also wondering… if maybe… ummm…"

"What?"

"There is another, ummm… meeting. I was wondering, that is… if you might have… time. I…"

"Nine-thirty… leave the door unlocked."

((Click))

"I… ok…"

Rei sat in the entry plug, waiting patiently. She did not fear the test, as she very rarely feared anything… but she was curious.

"Rei," Ritsuko's voice came to her, "we'll be ready to go in five."

"Yes," she replied calmly.

She looked at the tense faces through the monitor. Ritsuko and Maya were checking the systems one final time, and Misato was sitting off to one side, grimacing in pain as she shifted in her wheelchair.

Honestly, the blue-haired girl was very interested in the fact that the Major was there at all. The knife wound had been deep – and there had been much blood – but she knew that the woman had had a special kinship with Ikari, so she was not entirely surprised, just… fascinated.

"We're ready," Maya's voice came to her, pulling her from her thoughts.

The test began as normal, and Rei braced herself as they approached the absolute borderline. Always before, it was a roller coaster ride when the connection was made… and… it tried to enter her. She had almost lost to it, once… and it had ultimately ejected the plug, resulting in her injuries.

She had tried to tell Doctor Akagi… but the woman had ignored her – and written the incident up as 'mental instability' on her part.

Had she been more emotional, she might have laughed at the concept.

-Maybe,- she thought, -had she taken me more seriously… Ikari would—

Her thought process was interrupted as the third stage connection was made… and instead of cold and rejection, a feeling of calm peace swept through her. So profound was the unexpected rush of soothing heat that she gasped involuntarily.

"Rei?" Ritsuko said concernedly, "Are you alright? Rei??"

"He is… here…" the First Child's soft, slightly wondering voice came back, "he is… all around me…" she said, "and… within me…"

"What are you talking about?" Misato leaned forward, suddenly intense, "Is it Shinji? Can you talk to him?

There was a brief pause. "No," Rei replied, "but I can feel him. He is…" there was another pause, "I do not know how to explain it… but I will try."

"Take your time," Ritsuko said softly, "we're not in a hurry…"

They all waited tensely as Rei gathered herself, then spoke in a low, thoughtful voice. "It is him… but it is not him. It is like when I was in Unit 01… that… impression of him – but stronger." She took a breath, exhaling it very slowly. "I… do not think he knows… himself," she said softly, "I feel him… but not him."

There was another, longer pause, and Misato prompted her gently, "What do you mean by that, Rei?"

"Ikari is gone…" Rei replied, her voice sounding incredibly flat, "only EVA remains…"

Ritsuko shivered. "Any abnormalities?" she whispered to Maya, "Anything at ALL out of the ordinary?"

The brown-haired tech looked up at her, eyes wide, "Ummm… not… not exactly," she said.

Ritsuko leaned down as Maya pointed to her screen. "My God…" she whispered.

Hikari Horaki paced back and forth outside the Suzuhara residence. "What am I doing?" she whispered to herself.

It was late – nearly ten-thirty – and the impropriety of even being at a boy's house, let alone at that hour, made her feel slightly faint.

And that was not taking into account why she was there.

-It's not wrong…- she thought, pausing to look up at the house with a frown.

"Class Rep?" Touji's voice nearly made her jump out of her skin.

"Suzuhara!" she said, turning and putting a hand over her racing heart, "Don't DO that! You nearly gave me a heart-attack!"

"Sorry…" he said tiredly, "didn't mean to." He took a moment to get a better look at her. She had changed out of the black dress she had worn to the funeral and was now wearing pain blue jeans and a simple long-sleeve shirt. "What did you need?" he inquired, reaching into his pocket for his keys, "I'm… kinda wiped out."

"I… need to talk to you, Touji…" she said, deliberately using his first name.

This detail did not escape him, and his eyes widened, as she had never called him anything but Suzuhara (or, if she was with Asuka, 'idiot').

Blushing at his look of shock, she pressed forward, determined to say what was on her mind. "I… don't know if you've noticed, but I… I like you, Touji…"

His jaw dropped open. He had not, in fact, known this… and it hit him like a bucket of icewater – the crush itself and her boldness in stating it so plainly. "I… why are you telling me now?" he wondered (tact had never been his strong suit).

Hikari took a deep breath… and a step closer to him. "Because of Shinji…" she admitted quietly, "it got me thinking."

He nodded. "Yeah," he said softly, looking at the ground, "me too…"

She took another step. "I started thinking… what if it had been you? What if an angel attacked and you were crushed… or what if you got hit by a car… or what if you slipped on a banana peel and broke your neck." She reached out, touching his cheek with a trembling hand, "I just kept thinking, 'What if he was gone… and I didn't ever tell him how I felt?' and I couldn't bear it."

He looked up at her, meeting her eyes steadily as she went on. "I just needed you to know… even if you don't feel the same, I couldn't stand the idea of not telling you. I wanted to tell you after the funeral, but that NERV woman took you and I-"

"Hikari," he cut her off gently, "stop for a minute…"

She broke off, her breath catching in her throat, -Oh God…- she thought, -he doesn't like me… I'm so stupid!-

He sighed, laying her fears to rest by putting his hand over hers… and making them far worse than she ever imagined by whispering, "She took me away to tell me I'm the Fourth." He looked into her eyes, thinking sadly that she would surely leave now, "I'm the Fourth Child, Hikari… I'm Shinji's replacement…"

Her eyes tripled in size as the reality of the situation hit her. "No…" she whispered.

He nodded, "Yeah… I just got back from my first sync test."

She closed her eyes, realizing that she could smell something odd on his clothes… the same, faintly coppery scent she had subconsciously associated with Rei, Shinji, and Asuka.

His heart broke as she began trembling. "I'm sorry…" he said softly, "sorry that I was chosen… sorry that I didn't ever tell you that I like you too…" her eyes opened as he sighed regretfully, "sorry I won't ever get to go out with you now because it would be too hard to-"

He never got to finish as Hikari leaned forward, putting her other hand on his other cheek and pulling his lips to hers, kissing him desperately.

He stared at her in mute shock as she pulled away, tears spilling down her cheeks. "Be mine," she said simply, "I don't care if you're a pilot… I don't care if we all die tomorrow… as long as you're mine."

Dumbfounded, he nodded… totally at a loss for words.

She leaned up against him. "Hold me…" she said brokenly, "I'm so cold… I'm so scared… please hold me, Touji… please?"

Slowly, he brought his arms up and wrapped them around her as she began to cry… holding her close to him and wondering why it had taken the death of a friend to bring them together.

"It was… nice," Rei said softly, looking up at the giant blue robot, "to feel you."

The sync test had been over for six hours, but she had remained in the EVA cages, waiting patiently until everyone had gone… ignoring the odd looks and whispered comments until she was finally left alone.

Even then it had taken her an entire hour to finally speak aloud. "Doctor Akagi tells me that my sync ratio has gone from forty-three percent to sixty-eight." She studied the machine, wondering if perhaps she was unstable, then pressed forward, "They are sure that it is due to you being within."

She paused, wondering if he could hear her at all. "It is… odd…" she said thoughtfully, "my whole life has been to serve EVA, but now that I am better able to do it… it does not hold meaning." She looked down at her feet, "I told you once that I do not know what to do or feel at times when emotion is strong… do you recall what you told me?"

The EVA made no reply.

"You said, 'Why don't you try smiling?'" she said after a moment, looking up to the blue mecha again, "But I do not think that would be appropriate for what I am feeling now… though I would… for you."

-I will see you again,- she thought, letting a comfortable silence descend, -truly see you again… not just feel your pale shadow from within EVA. Someday…"

Suddenly she felt an arm slide around her throat… and cold metal press against her temple.

"Don't you move…" a trembling voice whispered into her ear, "not even a fucking inch…"

"Pilot Souryu…" Rei said softly, never looking away from the blue mecha. –Is it time?- she thought, -Perhaps I will get to see you sooner than I thought…-

"You took him…" Asuka whispered hoarsely, "you took him away from me…"

Rei blinked, "From you?" she repeated, "I do not understand… you did not ever exhibit any kindness toward Ikar-"

"SHUT UP!!" Asuka screamed, tightening her hold, "What do you know? WHAT??" Rei could feel the other girl's body shaking as she continued, "He was supposed to be with me… with ME! Do you understand?" Her voice cracked, but she went on, forcing the words out, "Now who's going to compete with me? Who's going to walk to school with me? And talk to me?"

Something warm splashed onto Rei's neck and Asuka's voice dropped so low she could barely hear it. "Who's going to smile at me now? Who? Who's going to be there when I get home?" Her voice almost disappeared as she whispered, "Who's going to dance with me?"

Rei assumed that the redhead was referring to the battle with the seventh angel… but did not understand its bearing on this matter.

She stumbled, falling to the ground as Asuka pushed her away and threw her head back, loosing a cry to the heavens, "WHY? God, tell me why you took him away before I knew what he meant to me… WHY!?!?!"

Rei watched in silence as the Second Child fell to her knees, the gun that had been pressed up against her head slipping to the ground, and wept like a lost child.

Slowly, the blue-haired girl rose and walked towards the exit. She stopped with her hand on the knob as Asuka spoke.

"I will kill you…" the redhead whispered, her voice completely devoid of emotion, "some day… when this is all over… I'm going to take from you all that you took from me… remember that, First…"

Rei turned to face her, searching her crystalline eyes for any trace of mercy or falsehood. Finding neither, she nodded. "I will not forget," she replied levelly, "and when that day has come, I will not fight… for you are correct – I did take something valuable." She shook her head, "But I did not take it from you alone, Pilot Souryu… I took it from everyone. I took it from Major Katsuragi… who now weeps every time she thinks no one is looking. I took it from Commander Ikari… who stares at Unit 00 as if hoping it will offer him absolution. I took it from the entire bridge crew… who all look at Pilot Suzuhara with confusion when he gets out of Unit 01 – as if they expect someone else."

"But most of all…" she said softly, "I took it from myself. I surrendered a part of me that day, something I was not even aware of until it was gone and I felt its absence." She stared into Asuka's blue eyes, "When the day comes… I will welcome your wrath with open arms… for there are none so worthy of it as I."

In silence, Asuka watched her leave – desperately wanting to feel some iota of compassion or understanding for the girl in light of her pitiful confession… but still only feeling hate.

Above her, the single red eye of Unit 00 watched impassively as she put the gun to her head and pulled the trigger… the dull click of the hammer falling on the empty chamber echoing over… and over… and over…

Continued…

And now, two omakes – graciously supplied by Shinagami.

Enjoy

Omake 1

"It was.....nice" Rei said to the giant blue robot, "to feel you." She groped the side of the Eva again, not noticing the large sweatdrop forming on it's brow. The synch test had been over for hours, but she'd stayed there waiting until the techs had gotten the picture that she wanted to talk to her robot alone, ignoring the comments they made.

"What a freak...."

"I think she has a fetish with that thing..."

"Wow she's hot!"

It took her an entire hour to speak aloud, even then it was actually a small burp, but it was start. "Dr. Akagi says my synch ratio has gone from forty-three to sixty-eight percent." She pressed on, and once more ignored a stray tech tell her she was unstable. Very unstable...talking to a robot....sheesh....

"It is odd. My whole life consists of Eva, and now that I am the ultimate champion of big robots it holds no meaning." The robot rolled its large single eye. "So I'm gonna quit."

The Eva would have made a response, but it had no mouth.

"You said 'why don't you try smiling' And I think it's appropriate that I tell you to try sticking up for yourself."

-I don't think I'll ever see you again.- She thought, letting a deafening silence descend. -Oh well, I guess your pale shadow within the Eva will have to do." She patted the side of the monster mecha lovingly.

Suddenly she felt an arm slide around her throat… and cold metal press against her temple.

"I stand corrected, I may just see you after all....."

"Don't you move...not even a fucking inch..." Rei turned slightly to see a BB gun against her head.

The blue unit 00 watched on in slight amusement as Asuka yelled 'That was an inch!' and begin capping Rei over and over and over…

Omake 2

From those heavens came a "Beats me." Asuka shrugged and continued her angst filled sobbing.

Rei watched in silence as the Second Child fell to her knees, the gun that had been pressed up against her head slipping to the ground and wept. She wept so childishly it made Shinji feel a bit envious.

Slowly, the blue-haired girl rose and walked towards the exit. She stopped with her hand on the knob as Asuka spoke.

"I will kill you…" the redhead whispered, her voice completely devoid of emotion, even though she'd emphasized the 'will'. "some day… when this is all over… I'm going to take from you all that you took from me… my favorite A-10 connectors!"

"I told you that Shinji was responsible for that. I believe he put it in his 'Asuka Infatuation Box'.

Rei turned to face her, searching her crystalline eyes for any trace of crystals or the like. Finding neither, she shrugged. "When that day has come, I will not fight… for you are correct - I did take something valuable." She pulled free a diamond ring from her pocket, "But I did not take it from you alone, Pilot Souryu… I took it from everyone" She pulled a necklace from the pocket." I took it from Major Katsuragi… who searches frantically through her drawers when she needs to go out with Mr. Kaji." From the pocket came rose tinted glasses. "I took it from Commander Ikari… who now weeps every time he thinks no one is looking." Next were some various pieces of jewelry. "I took it from the entire bridge crew… who all look at Pilot Suzuhara with contempt - for they think he is a thief."

"But most of all…" she said softly drawing out a picture of Shinji, "I took it from myself. I surrendered a part of me that day, something I was not even aware of until it was gone and I felt its absence." She stared into the picture, "When the day comes… I will welcome your wrath with open arms…or my Beretta ...for there are none so worthy of it as I, or you as the case may be."

In silence, Asuka watched her leave - desperately wanting to feel some iota of compassion or understanding for the girl in light of her pitiful confession… but still only feeling hunger, after all, she hadn't eaten since the funeral.

Above her, the single red eye of Unit 00 watched with slight bemusement as she put the gun to her head and pulled the trigger…the sound of BBs ricocheting off her head falling on the empty chamber echoing over… and over… and over…until it stopped.

"Ow...that hurts..."

Author's notes: Whew… that was hard to write. I tried to imagine what everyone's reaction would be to losing Shinji, and I think I got it pretty close (hope so, anyway). On Touji hitting on Maya – what? You can't see it? She's pretty… he's a jock… it's only natural… ;)

Thanks to Ryoma for pre-reading. Hey, is it just me? Or do Rei and Unit 00 make a really cute couple? (yeah… probably just me…) And thanks to Shinagami for the omakes.

Feedback is always welcome at random1377@yahoo.com