Ahhh... what I wouldn't give to see this happen....
The Gooseberry Bush Chronicles
Episode 2
Sasuke strutted over to Team 7's meeting place, preparing himself for another annoying interview with Sakura. He shook his under-aged (yet sexy) head of shining raven locks and sighed.
Why did it always have to be him? Why was he the hottest and most eligible rookie in the village? Why was he so damn delectable? Why couldn't they write in some cool, curvy and useful love interest for him? He sighed again.
Suddenly, her piercing, high-pitched whine reached him from across the river on the other side of the bridge.
"Ne, SASUKE-KUN! OHAYO!" Her freakishly pink head bobbed in excitement and her eyes looked duller and more 'shade baby-poop #34' than usual. She rushed across the bridge and latched onto him like a leech.
Naruto chose this opportune moment to rush over, accidentally knocking into Sasuke in his attempt to be on time. As Sasuke was concentrating on not becoming violently ill from Sakura's closeness, he hadn't noticed in time and fell to the ground with a thump.
"Sasuke-kun?" Sakura asked, and when he merely grunted in answer, she knelt down and squeezed him close to her flat bosom. "SASUKE-KUN?! DAIJOUBU KA? SASUKE-KUNNNNNNN!! DOUSHITE?!" She quickly broke down into sniveling sobs that disgusted him. He finally snapped.
"GOD DAMN IT, SAKURA!" he screamed as he pushed her off of him violently. "Why don't you just go FUCK yourself?!?!?!"
He quickly got up and strutted away, reassuming his 'I'm waaayyy too hot and cool for YOU, bub!' pose. There was no sound, except for Sakura's sniffling, and the somewhat muffled but joyful exclamation of, "YES! FINALLY!" from fan-girls everywhere.
Owari
P.S. In a completely unrelated incident, Sakura was stranded under a gooseberry bush and forced to eat her own hair to stave off starvation, but then she died of hair-dye poisoning anyway. Oh well...