A/N Okay this one is really long sorry, I just didn't want to break it up
because I promised the action in the next chapter and I though it would
loose something if I broke it up. But the action is in the next chapter
Redemption Chapter Forty Three
Syd watched Kat out of the corner of her eye. Their first movie was drawing to a close and Kat was fighting hard to keep her eyes open. Sydney had made the mistake of allowing her to eat some ice cream, which combined with the pizza had caused her blood sugar to become unstable and now exhaustion was taking her over.
Kat's decryption of the code had been a well-needed confidence booster for her. She'd been staying with Sydney for two days now and just about every waking moment of those two days and the past week had been spent analyzing and reanalyzing the code but to no avail. She was clearly frustrated and angry at the knowledge that she had contrived the code but was unable to solve it.
Sydney had to admit the peculiar image of Kat, Marshall and Will lying under the desk had daunted her belief. She'd thought there was no way Kat would have been able to decrypt the code using a creative manner, but she had. Through rearranging the pages and looking at them as one large image she'd been able to detect a pattern which triggered her memory of a similar code in the Nancy Drew book. After that it had just been the matter of decoding.
To both of them, it was as if the past week had never happened. Following Kat's confession in Dr. Barnette's office, their relationship had grown and they were closer than ever. She'd remained rather close lipped about her relationship with their father but Syd figured the two were both still trying to just figure it out themselves. To try and understand how they could live together, get along, understand each other and establish some sort of relationship without overstepping each others boundaries.
Kat picked up the video case and studied the image on the front as the credits began to roll. "That was good," she commented. "I hadn't seen it before."
"Never Been Kissed is one of my favorite movies," Syd stood and ejected the tape.
"I've finally figured out who that actor, the one that played the teacher reminded me of," Kat announced. "It's Michael. Must be all that forehead wrinkling he does."
"I like his forehead wrinkling," Sydney laughed. "It's cute!"
"You would," she snickered.
"Now speaking of first kisses," Syd moved to sit beside Kat and put an arm around her shoulders. "Tell me about yours?"
"What?" she asked surprised.
"Come on," Syd pleaded. "Weiss told me about a little lip lock action going on between you and a certain CIA Agent working undercover in Spain by the name of Aidan MacGreggor."
"How did he-"Kat clammed up her face turning bright red. "It was just a good bye kiss for show," she mumbled. "His sleezeball boss was there."
"And that's why you were in a daze for the rest of the trip?"
"Shut up!" Kat laughed and threw a pillow at her sister obviously embarrassed.
"Come on," Syd threw it back. "Spill."
"Alright, alright, alright. It was...... nice," she admitted.
"Nice?" Syd raised an eyebrow.
"Okay fine it was better than nice, it was awesome," Kat tucked her legs under her and turned to face her sister, her eyes sparkling at the memory. "It was sweet and incredible and amazing and I thought my legs were going to give out. It was my first kiss and I'm probably going to be comparing every single one I ever have to it."
"Someone's in love......"
"No," she shook her head. "It was just for show and its not like I'm ever going to see the guy again. But he sure was a good kisser," she giggled. "What about you? What was your first kiss like?"
"Horrible," Sydney admitted with a laugh. "I was fifteen and his name was David Mitchellson. It was his first time too and we smacked heads. I thought I broke my nose."
"Awww poor Sydney," Kat laughed.
"He was my first boyfriend, we dated for six months."
"How do you know, when you meet the right guy?" Kat asked quietly.
"What do you mean?" Syd took her hand and squeezed it gently urging her to continue.
"Well I'm afraid," she admitted. "I mean, I know not all guys are like the ones I've known. Some are wonderful and sweet like Michael or Eric but I'm worried that some day I will meet the right guy for me but I'll screw it up because I'm afraid he'll hurt me."
"I don't think you'd screw it up. You're smart Katy, far more intelligent that anyone gives you credit for. And you're right not all guys are like the men who have hurt you but some are and I'm confident that you will be able to pick them out. When you meet the right guy, I think you'll know. You'll see things differently. He'll be the last thing you think of before you fall asleep at night and the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning. It's the little things like he knows how you take your coffee and that when you wear certain clothes you're in a certain mood. Things like how just being around him makes the world seem like a better place and he'll risk getting sick when you are just to bring you chicken soup and kiss you because he knows it'll make you feel better."
"With Danny, how did you know?"
"That he was the one?" she asked for clarification and then proceeded. "When I first realized that I was in love with him, we'd been dating for about 8 months. I had a paper due the next day worth about 40% of my final grade but I wasn't finished. I'd just come home from an Op and I was exhausted. Danny had worked a double shift and he was exhausted but there he was at 1 AM looking up quotes and editing my thesis. I just looked over at him and his hair was all spiky, he was on his fourth cup of coffee and he just smiled at me and went right back to work and I knew. I just knew somehow that I was in love with this amazing man. He had to work the next morning too, I think he slept for about an hour and when I came home from class there was a rose on my pillow and a note. At that moment I just knew for sure I was in love, hopelessly and completely in love" Syd smiled at the memory bringing a tear to her eye that she blinked away. "When I lost him, I thought I'd never feel that way about anyone again. A few months later I met Vaughn."
"And did you know right away with Vaughn?"
"No," she laughed wiping away the tears on her cheek. "When I first met Vaughn I thought he was inexperienced, ego driven, out to play me and I never thought we'd end up where we are now." Syd stopped to regain her thoughts before continuing. "It had only been about two months since Danny died and I'd just found out what SD-6 really was, that my father had been lying to me virtually my entire life and he was a double Agent. The next thing I knew so was I. Vaughn became the only person I could to, the only person I could really trust and be completely honest with. I didn't have to lie or think about every word that came out of my mouth before I said it."
"How did it change?" she asked eagerly intent on hearing the full story.
"Our relationship slowly became more than just handler and asset. We became friends. He was my confidant. Being a double agent was incredibly difficult. Mentally is was exhausting and while I'm trained to compartmentalize there were things that I couldn't and he was there for me." Sydney paused for a few minutes to collect her thoughts before continuing. "One night I was supposed to have dinner with dad for the first time since I was a kid but he didn't show. He called and said he had work but I knew he was lying. I felt so many things that I didn't know what to do. I called Vaughn and he met me on the pier. I totally broke down. I cried and yelled and I even threw my beeper into the pacific. It wasn't just my dad it was everything. I didn't know who I was anymore, what I stood for. He was kind and he told me not what I wanted to hear but what I needed to hear and he said he'd always be there for me. When I was at my lowest low all I needed to do was call. I think that was when things began to change. He always backed me up. He became my guardian angel. He broke into The Vatican in Rome for me, broke me out of FBI Custody to prove that I wasn't the woman in Rambaldi's Prophecy-"
"He doesn't seem like much of a rule breaker," Kat interrupted.
"He wasn't," Syd laughed. "Atleast not until he met me anyway. Somewhere in the midst of all this chaos we began to fall in love. Last year he got really sick and I think that was when I realized how much I cared for him. The thought of loosing him, I couldn't bare it and then I met Alice, she was his girlfriend and I thought my heart would literally break in two. But I had a mission to complete and despite his current situation I realized that my feelings for him were very strong. I knew he felt the same when he showed me his father's watch and told me about it. It used to keep perfect time and when his dad gave it to him he said that you could set your heart by the watch. What was important about the watch was that it stopped on October 1 and that was the day that we met. Before I knew it SD-6 was taken down and we could finally be together and well the rest is history."
"Do you still miss Danny?"
"Yes," Sydney answered truthfully. "I loved him with all my heart; part of me still does and always will. Daniel Hecht was a wonderful man but I know that he would want me to be happy and with Vaughn, I am happy." Sydney paused to consider her words before speaking.
"I know that you're scared to be with someone, to open your heart and to be vulnerable but mostly to be intimate and to be hurt by a man again. But I also believe, no I know that someday you will meet a man who loves you and cares for you because you deserve it more than anything in the world. He'll be kind and good to you and he will understand your hesitations and together you can begin to repair the damage that's been done to your heart and to your soul. Experiencing love is a wonderful thing and it's something that I don't want you to miss out on." Sydney reached out tucking a lock of hair behind her little sisters ear. "I read somewhere once that the best gift that live can give you is that of a great love. I truly believe that."
"You're right," Kat sighed. "I am scared. I'm afraid that when a guy likes me, if a guy likes me, I'll get scared and I'll ruin it and miss my chance and always be wondering what if."
"You're seventeen Katy, you have all the time in the world to fall in love but along the way your heart will get broken but it makes you stronger, allows you to appreciate more to experience more and to love deeper and I know that in time you'll be okay. Not because I know that you're strong and smart and a survivor but just because you're you and you live life on your own terms. Don't cry," Syd laughed and wiped Kat's eyes and then her own.
"I can't help it," she said softly. "Never in a million years would I have imagined myself having a conversation with anyone about love especially with the sister I never knew I had. I didn't really have friends when I was a kid. I switched schools so much I didn't have time to make any and I was always the smart kid, the weird kid, the foster kid whose clothes were always out of style or hand me downs thrift store. I was the freak and I let those kids walk all over me. I was a loner because I didn't want to get hurt. After I was emancipated things were so much easier. I worked in a bookstore and as a waitress and I was doing whatever I wanted. I didn't have anyone telling me when to go to bed, or what to do. One night it was my sixteenth birthday and I had to work and the opening singer didn't show for the band at the place where I waitressed. The owner was totally freaking out. It was this band not widely known they were still trying to break out, they were called Nickelback. I don't know what made me do it but I just got on stage told the band what to play and I sang. I was so scared that they laugh me off the stage but they didn't. The audience clapped and cheered and they loved it. That night the owner was so surprised because no one knew I could sing and he fired the other girl and put me in her spot. That's what I did for the next year and a half. I was the opening act for the bands but Wednesday nights it was my show and I loved it. People came specifically to hear me and it was liberating to know that I could do something that made people happy. There were a couple girls there that I was friends with but not close. They'd ask me all the time to go out with them or try to set me up but I just couldn't. I couldn't let go of my past and I couldn't be happy." She was silent for a few moments struggling to find the right words. "I know that everything has been so messed up since I came to LA but Sydney I don't regret it. I'd go through it all again if I had to because I've never been happier. I know that with everything that has happened it seems ludicrous, but Sydney I finally feel like I fit in. I finally have friends. You and Eric, you're my best friends; I'd die if I lost you. Even Jack and the screwed up non-existent, existent relationship that we have I-I wouldn't trade any of it. I finally feel like, I have a home and a family."
"That's never going to change. You're always going to be my little sister," Sydney smiled at her. "Don't worry about Dad, it'll work out. I know it will. Since you came to us, he's changed Katy. For the better. Sometimes it's hard to see but I can see it around you. He's different. I missed out on a lot with him growing up. He had his reasons and I understand that but Katy I can see that he is trying not to make the same mistakes. He really is. He tries to mask his feelings, hide his emotions, but he really does care for you. He did before he found out you were his daughter and he does now. You have no idea what it took for him to allow you to see Sloane. He didn't want Sloane to use you as a pawn in whatever game he has. He didn't want to risk you getting hurt."
"I know," she nodded. "I know he had the best of intentions but I needed to see him."
"What happened when you went to see him?"
"Now what I wanted to, and everything Jack said would happen," shrugged sadly. "Sydney I needed to know why he did it. What his intentions were for me. Why he kept me away from you? I needed to know in order to understand who I am. I'm different I'm not the same person I was when I first came to LA four months. I'm not even the same person I was four weeks ago. I've known Arvin since I was six years old and Syd he was always my knight in shining armor. He was the kindest man I knew. I wanted him to adopt me; I wanted him to be my father. That man wasn't real. It was just an illusion, a façade he presented to hide his true self. Sydney nothing could have prepared me to meet the man that he really was. He was evasive, wouldn't answer my questions, he would just twist my words around and make them into things that they just weren't; implications that were unfounded. Jack said he wouldn't interfere unless it was absolutely necessary. He followed that. But Arvin was manipulating my words and using them to play on Jack and I got angry and I did something incredibly stupid."
"What?"
"I basically told Arvin... not in so many words but- I told him Jack was my father."
"I see, I take it that didn't go over well."
"An understatement," she nodded. "So for the rest of the time he used it to get under my skin to get under Jack's and to make me undermine anything Jack has ever told me. I knew exactly what he was doing but I was powerless to stop him. I just kept hoping that he would tell me the truth. And then he started talking about Irina and Jack just pulled me out. It was a waste of time. I'd never seen Arvin like that, so manipulative and deceitful." Kat shrugged feeling utterly defeated.
"Katy, about Irina-"
"No," Kat cut her off. "I don't want to talk about her. I hate her. Everything that she is I hate. I've never hated anyone like I hate her." Kat's eyes grew dark and cold as she spoke. "I despise that woman, I truly hate her and I couldn't care less if she died."
"You're angry, you don't mean that," Syd tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. "She's not exactly my favorite person but Katy's she's my mother, she's our mother."
"You're wrong," Kat interrupted her voice trembled slightly with anger. "I do hate her and she is not my mother-" a knock at the door interrupted them.
"Hey I'll get that, it's probably Vaughn; why don't you put on the popcorn and we can watch the other video and talk again after?"
"Sure," Kat stood and went into the kitchen.
Sydney opened the door. "Dad?" she said surprised.
"Hi Sydney," he said stepping inside.
"You're back early, your trip went well?"
"Yes," he nodded. "I won't stay I just have something for Katy."
"Oh I'll get her-"
"Sydney no," Jack shook his head and Sydney thought she detected a near bit of nervousness in his voice. "Would you just give it to her?" he passed Sydney a medium sized cardboard box.
"Dad no, I really think you should give it to her, she'd like to see you," she protested and handed back the box. "Katy!"
"Sydney no-"Jack wasn't able to finish his sentence.
"Sydney I think you need to get a new microwave," Kat called out as she approached the front door. "I hit the popcorn button but it just explod-," Kat held out the steaming bag of scorched popcorn. "Hi?"
"Hello Katarina," Jack greeted her with a small nod.
"Hi Jack."
"Dad came back early and he brought you something," Sydney grabbed the bag of charcoled kernels from her. "I'll take this."
"You got me a present?" she asked surprised.
"Yes," Jack handed her the box. "Be careful," he cautioned and she set the box down on the floor to open it.
"What is it?" Kat asked curiously.
"Just open it," Syd laughed eager to see what was inside herself.
Kat eyed Jack suspiciously as she began to open the box. "Oh my gosh," she whispered reaching in. "It's a kitten." Kat stood up holding the tiny orange and white striped tabby to her chest and the sleepy feline snuggled into her neck.
"It's a boy," Jack turned and retrieved a small grocery bag of litter and food. "I know you missed your other one so..."
"He's perfect," she grinned as the kitten licked her cheek.
"I've something else too." Jack picked up another bag and retrieved two wrapped packages. "Sydney," he handed her one.
"Thank you," she was surprised. Her father hadn't brought her home presents from business trips since she was a little girl. Opening the wrapped bundle she was pleasantly surprised to find several old leather bound books. They were first editions filled with poetry from various authors of the early 18th century. "They're beautiful, thanks dad," Sydney gave him a quick hug before turning her attention back to her sister.
"Les Miserables, and Anna Karenina," she read the titles softly running her fingertips over the leather bound volumes. "My favorites." She beckoned him towards her with her index finger and Jack bent down slightly to more her level. Standing up on her tiptoes Kat reached up and kissed his cheek. "Thank you Jack."
"You're welcome," Jack said gruffly surprised at her slight show of affection. "I'd better get going."
"Wait, couldn't you stay a while?" Kat asked laughing as the kitten licked her nose. "We were going to watch a movie, maybe you could watch it with us?"
"Yeah, come on Dad," Sydney took his arm guiding him in.
Jack and Kat entered the living room and Jack sat on the sofa watching curiously as Kat wrapped herself and the kitten up in a blanket shivering slightly. "Sydney?" he called to her and walked into the kitchen. "Is Katy all right?" he asked.
"Yeah sure," she nodded popping another bag of popcorn in the microwave. "She's great actually. She solved that code today."
"What did it say?" he asked taking a seat on one of stools.
Sydney grabbed a bottle of scotch from the liquor cabinet and poured her father a glass. "It's an address in St. Petersburg, a combination for a safe and a nursery rhyme."
"A nursery rhyme?" he asked skeptically
"I know weird. Weiss and Vaughn are checking into it, we'll probably end up going tomorrow if everything checks out. You got her a kitten?" She shook her head laughing.
"I found it near a dumpster at her old apartment in the city," Jack explained. "There was a litter of them. Her neighbor took the others to the animal shelter but I thought she'd like him, he was the runt and she missed her old cat." Hearing a tiny squeak Jack looked down to see the little runt looking up at him and meowing. "Katy?" he called but did not receive an answer. Picking the kitten up Jack and Sydney went into the living room to find Kat asleep curled up on the couch. "Katy?" Jack called again and this time she woke up.
"Yes?"
Jack sat down on the edge of the couch. "Are you alright?" he asked seeing her shiver again. "You have a fever," he put his hand to her forehead. Turning his head slightly he saw the empty pizza box on the floor and melted ice cream bowls and empty water bottles and water pitcher on the end table. "Sydney," he sighed.
"Oh don't yell at her," Kat mumbled. "It was my fault."
"Sit up." Jack took her hands pulling her to a sitting position.
"Come on," she groaned. "I really, really have a headache."
"I would hope so," Jack reached for her glucose test kit. "You're hyperglycemic."
"It just kind of snuck up on me," she explained as Jack tested her blood and then loaded a syringe with the appropriate amount of insulin to counter her high sugar level.
Sydney sat next to her father holding the kitten. "I should have kept a better eye on her."
"She knew exactly what she was doing," Jack inserted the needle into Kat's thigh. "Too much sugar results in high glucose. High glucose leads to Hyperglycemia and possibly diabetic coma."
"But insulin counteracts the sugar and twenty minutes and I'll be fine. It was stupid I know, I'm sorry." The phone rang and Sydney passed Kat the kitten as she went to answer it. "How about Oliver?" Kat asked Jack.
"Excuse me?"
"His name, Oliver, -what do you think?"
"Cute," he said after a moment wondering why she cared as to what he thought of the kitten's name.
"Oliver it is," Kat allowed the kitten to snuggle up in her neck. "Sydney said you went to New York."
"Yes," Jack sat down beside her. "I needed to tie up some loose ends about Kathryn. I reported her death to the police and the place where you worked. It was a car accident. I talked to your boss, nice guy."
"He is," Kat nodded. "He gave me a break when no one else would."
"He said at least once a month different music agents approached him trying to sign you but you always said no."
"Yeah, I was happy with my life, I didn't want things to change. But two days after The Covenant took me, I was scheduled to meet with an owner to sign a recording contract. I was going to make a record but I guess not anymore."
"No," Jack shook his head. "Your boss did give me some of the things that had been left at the club. Some photographs, music and your guitar and violin, they're at my apartment."
"Thanks, I missed playing." Jack stood and Kat grabbed his hand. "Sit with me a minute?" she requested.
"If you'd like," Jack sat back down and Kat moved to the middle seat to sit beside him. They sat in silence for several minutes before Kat finally spoke. "So I've been doing some thinking about you and me," she began her voice trembling slightly with nervousness. "And, you're my father, my real father. So I suppose it's kind of disrespectful for me to call you by your first name."
"What are you saying exactly?" He asked quietly.
"I've never been able to call anyone Dad, I mean I had Papa but he wasn't real, he wasn't my father," Kat stared at the kitten in her lap as she spoke. "I was kind of thinking that maybe we could try it out? I know it would be weird, take some getting used to. Maybe it won't work at all but maybe we could give it a shot. Only if you want to of course."
"That would fine," Jack nodded in agreement hoping his hesitance didn't show
"Really?"
"Really."
"Thanks," Kat leaned over and wrapped her arms around his neck tears slipped from her eyes. Jack held her close and rubbed her back his eyes closed in relief and happiness. "Thanks Daddy," she whispered in his ear.
The first time he'd heard that word Sydney had been around a year and a half. Mama had been her first word. Cat and dog soon followed along with several others but not Dada. Jack had been deeply involved with Project Christmas at the time, spending long hours at the office and away on business trips for weeks at a time he barely saw his daughter not enough for her to know who her father was. He'd come home exhausted after a particularly difficult field mission. Sydney was asleep and Laura had been teaching a night class so when he arrived home he'd paid the baby sitter and retired alone to the dimly lit bedroom. They'd lost three agents on that mission and it was the lowest of lows for him when he questioned everything that he stood for and everything that he was fighting for. What was he fighting for? The ideology of the times was shrouded in political lies and deceit. The lines of good versus bad were blurred and easily crossed and it seemed like there would never be an end in sight. His head was down; his eyes closed in a fleeting attempt to avoid the oncoming headache. He didn't see her coming not until he heard the soft thud of her pampered bottom hitting the carpeted floor and he looked up. She must have climbed out of her crib, when had she learned to do that—he could just add it to the growing list of things he'd missed. Her chestnut hair fell in curls to her shoulders and her eyes were dark and wide. She got to her feet her hands planted firmly on the floor, her rear end high in the air as she straightened herself and toddled towards him in her little footie pajamas holding out her arms to him and then uttered the sweetest words he'd ever heard. "Daddy." He'd simply picked her up and held her in his arms rubbing her back in a circular motion until she'd fallen asleep and long after that. She was the reminder of what he was fighting for.
Hearing Katarina call him Daddy, truly call him and acknowledge him as her father mirrored the image of eighteen month old Sydney calling him Daddy. Indeed they were still the sweetest words a father could hear.
Sydney tucked the phone under her ear as she got a glass from the cupboard and listened to Vaughn explain the Op details. "And everything checked-" She lost her words as she turned and saw Katy hugging their father. She was crying but Sydney suspected that they weren't tears of sadness. The smile on her sister's face convinced her of that.
"Syd you there-?" Vaughn's voice interrupted her thoughts and she turned away from them.
"Yeah I'm here sorry." Sydney opened the fridge door and pulled out the juice pouring some into the glass. "You're sure there's no way around it?" she asked.
"Yeah, Devlin laid it out, there is no other option. Your father will run the op from base camp though." Vaughn and Sydney continued to talk for several more minutes before he said goodnight.
"Goodnight Vaughn." Sydney hung up the phone and grabbed the bowl of popcorn heading back into the living room. "Got the-"she stopped short seeing her father. He sat on the end of the couch and Kat lay asleep, her head in his lap and the kitten cuddled in the crook of her neck. Jack had spread a blanket over her small frame and was now absently stroking her silken hair as she slept.
"That was Vaughn," she said quietly sitting on the coffee table to face him.
"They verified the Intel, the address is a property in St. Petersburg, no one has lived there for years but the maintenance has been kept up on it. Property records show it is registered to Alexander Khasinau. We're going in tomorrow and you're running the op from basecamp. There is one thing though..."
Jack's eyes met hers as he looked up from his sleeping daughter.
"Kat's coming with us."
A/N Now I know some of you are wondering who Aidan MacGreggor is well I had to change his characters name. He was Jake MacGyver/JD Salenger, the CIA Agent who was undercover in Spain but he is now Aidan MacGreggor.
Coming Up: The team goes to St. Petersburg Russia to search for scroll 47 but they are met with an unlikely surprise.
Redemption Chapter Forty Three
Syd watched Kat out of the corner of her eye. Their first movie was drawing to a close and Kat was fighting hard to keep her eyes open. Sydney had made the mistake of allowing her to eat some ice cream, which combined with the pizza had caused her blood sugar to become unstable and now exhaustion was taking her over.
Kat's decryption of the code had been a well-needed confidence booster for her. She'd been staying with Sydney for two days now and just about every waking moment of those two days and the past week had been spent analyzing and reanalyzing the code but to no avail. She was clearly frustrated and angry at the knowledge that she had contrived the code but was unable to solve it.
Sydney had to admit the peculiar image of Kat, Marshall and Will lying under the desk had daunted her belief. She'd thought there was no way Kat would have been able to decrypt the code using a creative manner, but she had. Through rearranging the pages and looking at them as one large image she'd been able to detect a pattern which triggered her memory of a similar code in the Nancy Drew book. After that it had just been the matter of decoding.
To both of them, it was as if the past week had never happened. Following Kat's confession in Dr. Barnette's office, their relationship had grown and they were closer than ever. She'd remained rather close lipped about her relationship with their father but Syd figured the two were both still trying to just figure it out themselves. To try and understand how they could live together, get along, understand each other and establish some sort of relationship without overstepping each others boundaries.
Kat picked up the video case and studied the image on the front as the credits began to roll. "That was good," she commented. "I hadn't seen it before."
"Never Been Kissed is one of my favorite movies," Syd stood and ejected the tape.
"I've finally figured out who that actor, the one that played the teacher reminded me of," Kat announced. "It's Michael. Must be all that forehead wrinkling he does."
"I like his forehead wrinkling," Sydney laughed. "It's cute!"
"You would," she snickered.
"Now speaking of first kisses," Syd moved to sit beside Kat and put an arm around her shoulders. "Tell me about yours?"
"What?" she asked surprised.
"Come on," Syd pleaded. "Weiss told me about a little lip lock action going on between you and a certain CIA Agent working undercover in Spain by the name of Aidan MacGreggor."
"How did he-"Kat clammed up her face turning bright red. "It was just a good bye kiss for show," she mumbled. "His sleezeball boss was there."
"And that's why you were in a daze for the rest of the trip?"
"Shut up!" Kat laughed and threw a pillow at her sister obviously embarrassed.
"Come on," Syd threw it back. "Spill."
"Alright, alright, alright. It was...... nice," she admitted.
"Nice?" Syd raised an eyebrow.
"Okay fine it was better than nice, it was awesome," Kat tucked her legs under her and turned to face her sister, her eyes sparkling at the memory. "It was sweet and incredible and amazing and I thought my legs were going to give out. It was my first kiss and I'm probably going to be comparing every single one I ever have to it."
"Someone's in love......"
"No," she shook her head. "It was just for show and its not like I'm ever going to see the guy again. But he sure was a good kisser," she giggled. "What about you? What was your first kiss like?"
"Horrible," Sydney admitted with a laugh. "I was fifteen and his name was David Mitchellson. It was his first time too and we smacked heads. I thought I broke my nose."
"Awww poor Sydney," Kat laughed.
"He was my first boyfriend, we dated for six months."
"How do you know, when you meet the right guy?" Kat asked quietly.
"What do you mean?" Syd took her hand and squeezed it gently urging her to continue.
"Well I'm afraid," she admitted. "I mean, I know not all guys are like the ones I've known. Some are wonderful and sweet like Michael or Eric but I'm worried that some day I will meet the right guy for me but I'll screw it up because I'm afraid he'll hurt me."
"I don't think you'd screw it up. You're smart Katy, far more intelligent that anyone gives you credit for. And you're right not all guys are like the men who have hurt you but some are and I'm confident that you will be able to pick them out. When you meet the right guy, I think you'll know. You'll see things differently. He'll be the last thing you think of before you fall asleep at night and the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning. It's the little things like he knows how you take your coffee and that when you wear certain clothes you're in a certain mood. Things like how just being around him makes the world seem like a better place and he'll risk getting sick when you are just to bring you chicken soup and kiss you because he knows it'll make you feel better."
"With Danny, how did you know?"
"That he was the one?" she asked for clarification and then proceeded. "When I first realized that I was in love with him, we'd been dating for about 8 months. I had a paper due the next day worth about 40% of my final grade but I wasn't finished. I'd just come home from an Op and I was exhausted. Danny had worked a double shift and he was exhausted but there he was at 1 AM looking up quotes and editing my thesis. I just looked over at him and his hair was all spiky, he was on his fourth cup of coffee and he just smiled at me and went right back to work and I knew. I just knew somehow that I was in love with this amazing man. He had to work the next morning too, I think he slept for about an hour and when I came home from class there was a rose on my pillow and a note. At that moment I just knew for sure I was in love, hopelessly and completely in love" Syd smiled at the memory bringing a tear to her eye that she blinked away. "When I lost him, I thought I'd never feel that way about anyone again. A few months later I met Vaughn."
"And did you know right away with Vaughn?"
"No," she laughed wiping away the tears on her cheek. "When I first met Vaughn I thought he was inexperienced, ego driven, out to play me and I never thought we'd end up where we are now." Syd stopped to regain her thoughts before continuing. "It had only been about two months since Danny died and I'd just found out what SD-6 really was, that my father had been lying to me virtually my entire life and he was a double Agent. The next thing I knew so was I. Vaughn became the only person I could to, the only person I could really trust and be completely honest with. I didn't have to lie or think about every word that came out of my mouth before I said it."
"How did it change?" she asked eagerly intent on hearing the full story.
"Our relationship slowly became more than just handler and asset. We became friends. He was my confidant. Being a double agent was incredibly difficult. Mentally is was exhausting and while I'm trained to compartmentalize there were things that I couldn't and he was there for me." Sydney paused for a few minutes to collect her thoughts before continuing. "One night I was supposed to have dinner with dad for the first time since I was a kid but he didn't show. He called and said he had work but I knew he was lying. I felt so many things that I didn't know what to do. I called Vaughn and he met me on the pier. I totally broke down. I cried and yelled and I even threw my beeper into the pacific. It wasn't just my dad it was everything. I didn't know who I was anymore, what I stood for. He was kind and he told me not what I wanted to hear but what I needed to hear and he said he'd always be there for me. When I was at my lowest low all I needed to do was call. I think that was when things began to change. He always backed me up. He became my guardian angel. He broke into The Vatican in Rome for me, broke me out of FBI Custody to prove that I wasn't the woman in Rambaldi's Prophecy-"
"He doesn't seem like much of a rule breaker," Kat interrupted.
"He wasn't," Syd laughed. "Atleast not until he met me anyway. Somewhere in the midst of all this chaos we began to fall in love. Last year he got really sick and I think that was when I realized how much I cared for him. The thought of loosing him, I couldn't bare it and then I met Alice, she was his girlfriend and I thought my heart would literally break in two. But I had a mission to complete and despite his current situation I realized that my feelings for him were very strong. I knew he felt the same when he showed me his father's watch and told me about it. It used to keep perfect time and when his dad gave it to him he said that you could set your heart by the watch. What was important about the watch was that it stopped on October 1 and that was the day that we met. Before I knew it SD-6 was taken down and we could finally be together and well the rest is history."
"Do you still miss Danny?"
"Yes," Sydney answered truthfully. "I loved him with all my heart; part of me still does and always will. Daniel Hecht was a wonderful man but I know that he would want me to be happy and with Vaughn, I am happy." Sydney paused to consider her words before speaking.
"I know that you're scared to be with someone, to open your heart and to be vulnerable but mostly to be intimate and to be hurt by a man again. But I also believe, no I know that someday you will meet a man who loves you and cares for you because you deserve it more than anything in the world. He'll be kind and good to you and he will understand your hesitations and together you can begin to repair the damage that's been done to your heart and to your soul. Experiencing love is a wonderful thing and it's something that I don't want you to miss out on." Sydney reached out tucking a lock of hair behind her little sisters ear. "I read somewhere once that the best gift that live can give you is that of a great love. I truly believe that."
"You're right," Kat sighed. "I am scared. I'm afraid that when a guy likes me, if a guy likes me, I'll get scared and I'll ruin it and miss my chance and always be wondering what if."
"You're seventeen Katy, you have all the time in the world to fall in love but along the way your heart will get broken but it makes you stronger, allows you to appreciate more to experience more and to love deeper and I know that in time you'll be okay. Not because I know that you're strong and smart and a survivor but just because you're you and you live life on your own terms. Don't cry," Syd laughed and wiped Kat's eyes and then her own.
"I can't help it," she said softly. "Never in a million years would I have imagined myself having a conversation with anyone about love especially with the sister I never knew I had. I didn't really have friends when I was a kid. I switched schools so much I didn't have time to make any and I was always the smart kid, the weird kid, the foster kid whose clothes were always out of style or hand me downs thrift store. I was the freak and I let those kids walk all over me. I was a loner because I didn't want to get hurt. After I was emancipated things were so much easier. I worked in a bookstore and as a waitress and I was doing whatever I wanted. I didn't have anyone telling me when to go to bed, or what to do. One night it was my sixteenth birthday and I had to work and the opening singer didn't show for the band at the place where I waitressed. The owner was totally freaking out. It was this band not widely known they were still trying to break out, they were called Nickelback. I don't know what made me do it but I just got on stage told the band what to play and I sang. I was so scared that they laugh me off the stage but they didn't. The audience clapped and cheered and they loved it. That night the owner was so surprised because no one knew I could sing and he fired the other girl and put me in her spot. That's what I did for the next year and a half. I was the opening act for the bands but Wednesday nights it was my show and I loved it. People came specifically to hear me and it was liberating to know that I could do something that made people happy. There were a couple girls there that I was friends with but not close. They'd ask me all the time to go out with them or try to set me up but I just couldn't. I couldn't let go of my past and I couldn't be happy." She was silent for a few moments struggling to find the right words. "I know that everything has been so messed up since I came to LA but Sydney I don't regret it. I'd go through it all again if I had to because I've never been happier. I know that with everything that has happened it seems ludicrous, but Sydney I finally feel like I fit in. I finally have friends. You and Eric, you're my best friends; I'd die if I lost you. Even Jack and the screwed up non-existent, existent relationship that we have I-I wouldn't trade any of it. I finally feel like, I have a home and a family."
"That's never going to change. You're always going to be my little sister," Sydney smiled at her. "Don't worry about Dad, it'll work out. I know it will. Since you came to us, he's changed Katy. For the better. Sometimes it's hard to see but I can see it around you. He's different. I missed out on a lot with him growing up. He had his reasons and I understand that but Katy I can see that he is trying not to make the same mistakes. He really is. He tries to mask his feelings, hide his emotions, but he really does care for you. He did before he found out you were his daughter and he does now. You have no idea what it took for him to allow you to see Sloane. He didn't want Sloane to use you as a pawn in whatever game he has. He didn't want to risk you getting hurt."
"I know," she nodded. "I know he had the best of intentions but I needed to see him."
"What happened when you went to see him?"
"Now what I wanted to, and everything Jack said would happen," shrugged sadly. "Sydney I needed to know why he did it. What his intentions were for me. Why he kept me away from you? I needed to know in order to understand who I am. I'm different I'm not the same person I was when I first came to LA four months. I'm not even the same person I was four weeks ago. I've known Arvin since I was six years old and Syd he was always my knight in shining armor. He was the kindest man I knew. I wanted him to adopt me; I wanted him to be my father. That man wasn't real. It was just an illusion, a façade he presented to hide his true self. Sydney nothing could have prepared me to meet the man that he really was. He was evasive, wouldn't answer my questions, he would just twist my words around and make them into things that they just weren't; implications that were unfounded. Jack said he wouldn't interfere unless it was absolutely necessary. He followed that. But Arvin was manipulating my words and using them to play on Jack and I got angry and I did something incredibly stupid."
"What?"
"I basically told Arvin... not in so many words but- I told him Jack was my father."
"I see, I take it that didn't go over well."
"An understatement," she nodded. "So for the rest of the time he used it to get under my skin to get under Jack's and to make me undermine anything Jack has ever told me. I knew exactly what he was doing but I was powerless to stop him. I just kept hoping that he would tell me the truth. And then he started talking about Irina and Jack just pulled me out. It was a waste of time. I'd never seen Arvin like that, so manipulative and deceitful." Kat shrugged feeling utterly defeated.
"Katy, about Irina-"
"No," Kat cut her off. "I don't want to talk about her. I hate her. Everything that she is I hate. I've never hated anyone like I hate her." Kat's eyes grew dark and cold as she spoke. "I despise that woman, I truly hate her and I couldn't care less if she died."
"You're angry, you don't mean that," Syd tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. "She's not exactly my favorite person but Katy's she's my mother, she's our mother."
"You're wrong," Kat interrupted her voice trembled slightly with anger. "I do hate her and she is not my mother-" a knock at the door interrupted them.
"Hey I'll get that, it's probably Vaughn; why don't you put on the popcorn and we can watch the other video and talk again after?"
"Sure," Kat stood and went into the kitchen.
Sydney opened the door. "Dad?" she said surprised.
"Hi Sydney," he said stepping inside.
"You're back early, your trip went well?"
"Yes," he nodded. "I won't stay I just have something for Katy."
"Oh I'll get her-"
"Sydney no," Jack shook his head and Sydney thought she detected a near bit of nervousness in his voice. "Would you just give it to her?" he passed Sydney a medium sized cardboard box.
"Dad no, I really think you should give it to her, she'd like to see you," she protested and handed back the box. "Katy!"
"Sydney no-"Jack wasn't able to finish his sentence.
"Sydney I think you need to get a new microwave," Kat called out as she approached the front door. "I hit the popcorn button but it just explod-," Kat held out the steaming bag of scorched popcorn. "Hi?"
"Hello Katarina," Jack greeted her with a small nod.
"Hi Jack."
"Dad came back early and he brought you something," Sydney grabbed the bag of charcoled kernels from her. "I'll take this."
"You got me a present?" she asked surprised.
"Yes," Jack handed her the box. "Be careful," he cautioned and she set the box down on the floor to open it.
"What is it?" Kat asked curiously.
"Just open it," Syd laughed eager to see what was inside herself.
Kat eyed Jack suspiciously as she began to open the box. "Oh my gosh," she whispered reaching in. "It's a kitten." Kat stood up holding the tiny orange and white striped tabby to her chest and the sleepy feline snuggled into her neck.
"It's a boy," Jack turned and retrieved a small grocery bag of litter and food. "I know you missed your other one so..."
"He's perfect," she grinned as the kitten licked her cheek.
"I've something else too." Jack picked up another bag and retrieved two wrapped packages. "Sydney," he handed her one.
"Thank you," she was surprised. Her father hadn't brought her home presents from business trips since she was a little girl. Opening the wrapped bundle she was pleasantly surprised to find several old leather bound books. They were first editions filled with poetry from various authors of the early 18th century. "They're beautiful, thanks dad," Sydney gave him a quick hug before turning her attention back to her sister.
"Les Miserables, and Anna Karenina," she read the titles softly running her fingertips over the leather bound volumes. "My favorites." She beckoned him towards her with her index finger and Jack bent down slightly to more her level. Standing up on her tiptoes Kat reached up and kissed his cheek. "Thank you Jack."
"You're welcome," Jack said gruffly surprised at her slight show of affection. "I'd better get going."
"Wait, couldn't you stay a while?" Kat asked laughing as the kitten licked her nose. "We were going to watch a movie, maybe you could watch it with us?"
"Yeah, come on Dad," Sydney took his arm guiding him in.
Jack and Kat entered the living room and Jack sat on the sofa watching curiously as Kat wrapped herself and the kitten up in a blanket shivering slightly. "Sydney?" he called to her and walked into the kitchen. "Is Katy all right?" he asked.
"Yeah sure," she nodded popping another bag of popcorn in the microwave. "She's great actually. She solved that code today."
"What did it say?" he asked taking a seat on one of stools.
Sydney grabbed a bottle of scotch from the liquor cabinet and poured her father a glass. "It's an address in St. Petersburg, a combination for a safe and a nursery rhyme."
"A nursery rhyme?" he asked skeptically
"I know weird. Weiss and Vaughn are checking into it, we'll probably end up going tomorrow if everything checks out. You got her a kitten?" She shook her head laughing.
"I found it near a dumpster at her old apartment in the city," Jack explained. "There was a litter of them. Her neighbor took the others to the animal shelter but I thought she'd like him, he was the runt and she missed her old cat." Hearing a tiny squeak Jack looked down to see the little runt looking up at him and meowing. "Katy?" he called but did not receive an answer. Picking the kitten up Jack and Sydney went into the living room to find Kat asleep curled up on the couch. "Katy?" Jack called again and this time she woke up.
"Yes?"
Jack sat down on the edge of the couch. "Are you alright?" he asked seeing her shiver again. "You have a fever," he put his hand to her forehead. Turning his head slightly he saw the empty pizza box on the floor and melted ice cream bowls and empty water bottles and water pitcher on the end table. "Sydney," he sighed.
"Oh don't yell at her," Kat mumbled. "It was my fault."
"Sit up." Jack took her hands pulling her to a sitting position.
"Come on," she groaned. "I really, really have a headache."
"I would hope so," Jack reached for her glucose test kit. "You're hyperglycemic."
"It just kind of snuck up on me," she explained as Jack tested her blood and then loaded a syringe with the appropriate amount of insulin to counter her high sugar level.
Sydney sat next to her father holding the kitten. "I should have kept a better eye on her."
"She knew exactly what she was doing," Jack inserted the needle into Kat's thigh. "Too much sugar results in high glucose. High glucose leads to Hyperglycemia and possibly diabetic coma."
"But insulin counteracts the sugar and twenty minutes and I'll be fine. It was stupid I know, I'm sorry." The phone rang and Sydney passed Kat the kitten as she went to answer it. "How about Oliver?" Kat asked Jack.
"Excuse me?"
"His name, Oliver, -what do you think?"
"Cute," he said after a moment wondering why she cared as to what he thought of the kitten's name.
"Oliver it is," Kat allowed the kitten to snuggle up in her neck. "Sydney said you went to New York."
"Yes," Jack sat down beside her. "I needed to tie up some loose ends about Kathryn. I reported her death to the police and the place where you worked. It was a car accident. I talked to your boss, nice guy."
"He is," Kat nodded. "He gave me a break when no one else would."
"He said at least once a month different music agents approached him trying to sign you but you always said no."
"Yeah, I was happy with my life, I didn't want things to change. But two days after The Covenant took me, I was scheduled to meet with an owner to sign a recording contract. I was going to make a record but I guess not anymore."
"No," Jack shook his head. "Your boss did give me some of the things that had been left at the club. Some photographs, music and your guitar and violin, they're at my apartment."
"Thanks, I missed playing." Jack stood and Kat grabbed his hand. "Sit with me a minute?" she requested.
"If you'd like," Jack sat back down and Kat moved to the middle seat to sit beside him. They sat in silence for several minutes before Kat finally spoke. "So I've been doing some thinking about you and me," she began her voice trembling slightly with nervousness. "And, you're my father, my real father. So I suppose it's kind of disrespectful for me to call you by your first name."
"What are you saying exactly?" He asked quietly.
"I've never been able to call anyone Dad, I mean I had Papa but he wasn't real, he wasn't my father," Kat stared at the kitten in her lap as she spoke. "I was kind of thinking that maybe we could try it out? I know it would be weird, take some getting used to. Maybe it won't work at all but maybe we could give it a shot. Only if you want to of course."
"That would fine," Jack nodded in agreement hoping his hesitance didn't show
"Really?"
"Really."
"Thanks," Kat leaned over and wrapped her arms around his neck tears slipped from her eyes. Jack held her close and rubbed her back his eyes closed in relief and happiness. "Thanks Daddy," she whispered in his ear.
The first time he'd heard that word Sydney had been around a year and a half. Mama had been her first word. Cat and dog soon followed along with several others but not Dada. Jack had been deeply involved with Project Christmas at the time, spending long hours at the office and away on business trips for weeks at a time he barely saw his daughter not enough for her to know who her father was. He'd come home exhausted after a particularly difficult field mission. Sydney was asleep and Laura had been teaching a night class so when he arrived home he'd paid the baby sitter and retired alone to the dimly lit bedroom. They'd lost three agents on that mission and it was the lowest of lows for him when he questioned everything that he stood for and everything that he was fighting for. What was he fighting for? The ideology of the times was shrouded in political lies and deceit. The lines of good versus bad were blurred and easily crossed and it seemed like there would never be an end in sight. His head was down; his eyes closed in a fleeting attempt to avoid the oncoming headache. He didn't see her coming not until he heard the soft thud of her pampered bottom hitting the carpeted floor and he looked up. She must have climbed out of her crib, when had she learned to do that—he could just add it to the growing list of things he'd missed. Her chestnut hair fell in curls to her shoulders and her eyes were dark and wide. She got to her feet her hands planted firmly on the floor, her rear end high in the air as she straightened herself and toddled towards him in her little footie pajamas holding out her arms to him and then uttered the sweetest words he'd ever heard. "Daddy." He'd simply picked her up and held her in his arms rubbing her back in a circular motion until she'd fallen asleep and long after that. She was the reminder of what he was fighting for.
Hearing Katarina call him Daddy, truly call him and acknowledge him as her father mirrored the image of eighteen month old Sydney calling him Daddy. Indeed they were still the sweetest words a father could hear.
Sydney tucked the phone under her ear as she got a glass from the cupboard and listened to Vaughn explain the Op details. "And everything checked-" She lost her words as she turned and saw Katy hugging their father. She was crying but Sydney suspected that they weren't tears of sadness. The smile on her sister's face convinced her of that.
"Syd you there-?" Vaughn's voice interrupted her thoughts and she turned away from them.
"Yeah I'm here sorry." Sydney opened the fridge door and pulled out the juice pouring some into the glass. "You're sure there's no way around it?" she asked.
"Yeah, Devlin laid it out, there is no other option. Your father will run the op from base camp though." Vaughn and Sydney continued to talk for several more minutes before he said goodnight.
"Goodnight Vaughn." Sydney hung up the phone and grabbed the bowl of popcorn heading back into the living room. "Got the-"she stopped short seeing her father. He sat on the end of the couch and Kat lay asleep, her head in his lap and the kitten cuddled in the crook of her neck. Jack had spread a blanket over her small frame and was now absently stroking her silken hair as she slept.
"That was Vaughn," she said quietly sitting on the coffee table to face him.
"They verified the Intel, the address is a property in St. Petersburg, no one has lived there for years but the maintenance has been kept up on it. Property records show it is registered to Alexander Khasinau. We're going in tomorrow and you're running the op from basecamp. There is one thing though..."
Jack's eyes met hers as he looked up from his sleeping daughter.
"Kat's coming with us."
A/N Now I know some of you are wondering who Aidan MacGreggor is well I had to change his characters name. He was Jake MacGyver/JD Salenger, the CIA Agent who was undercover in Spain but he is now Aidan MacGreggor.
Coming Up: The team goes to St. Petersburg Russia to search for scroll 47 but they are met with an unlikely surprise.