I wrapped the spaghetti around my fork aimlessly. It's been about three weeks since the dream I had. The next day after the phone call from Amy I got another call from Sam, Alex's girlfriend. She told me she was glad she saw me at the viewing, which was weird because I only dreamt of the funeral.

The gang has seen a change in me too. They always stare at me like they want to know if something's wrong. So yeah, I stare off into the distance and I'm in my own little world more often. But come on, if the hottest ghost just kissed you, you would be daydreaming too.

I'm not as happy as a I used to be. Not as energetic, hyperactive, or talkative. I'm just…there. I rarely speak unless spoken to and I hardly pay attention in class (well, that's nothing new but I pay LESS attention than before). I guess you could call me depressed. But you know, not to the point where I harm myself!

"Hey, Red. Is everything alright?" Odd asked. You know, I'm pretty sick of everyone asking if I was fine. If I wasn't I would tell someone! I set down my fork.

"Odd, I would really appreciate if you would stop asking me that. That's all everyone ever says to me! Asking if I am okay, and you know what? I'm sick of it. What would make you think that I am not okay? Please tell me! Because I sure as hell don't know what you are talking about!" By now I was talking pretty loudly. Everyone at the table stared at me in shock. Ulrich spoke first.

"Jamie, we just want to know what going on with-"

"Ulrich there is nothing wrong! Nothing is different!" I was breathing heavily now. This conversation is starting to piss me off.

"There is something different, Jamie! You don't talk anymore. All you do is mope around all the time! You aren't yourself. Ever since you came back from Lyoko you have been acting strange and everyone is wondering what's happened! Even Sissi is asking what the hell is wrong with you because you aren't pissing her off like you usually do!" Wow. Odd can sure yell. And the fact that he is yelling at me just makes matters worse.

I am sick. Sick of thinking about Alex and what could have been. Blaming myself for not taking the relationship into my own hands. And since that kiss I knew he felt the same way all along, and we did nothing while he was still alive. It took his life and my going across the sea for us to see that. It wasn't fair.

"Lay off, Odd you have no idea what I am going through." I looked at him intently. I wanted my eyes to burn a whole right through his head.

"I would if you would tell me. But you aren't telling anyone, Jamie! That's your problem. You can't keep it bottled up forever!" He slammed his fist on the table. Jeremie and Yumi were trying to get him to calm down. Didn't seem like it was working.

"You have no right to say that to me, Odd. I thought of all people you would understand when someone needs time alone. I was wrong. Wrong about you, I guess. If I want to keep something to myself that should NOT matter to you! This has nothing to deal with you! So stop pushing me to tell you so badly because it is NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!" With that, I ran out of the dining hall, ignoring the shouts people were calling for me to come back.

I can see where Odd wanted to know what was up with me, but he should no better to give me space. I mean, he's given me all the space I needed since I knew him; why start now? It didn't make sense to me.

By now I had ran into the forest. I couldn't see anymore as tears were filling up my eyes and making their way down my cheeks. I heard someone call my name but I just ignored it. I want to be left alone.

I ran further and further into the woods, not knowing where I was going. I just wanted to get away from it all for just one day. You must be thinking 'what a drama queen' but you have no idea what I've been through.

The reason why I wanted to come to France to study was to get out of my house. Don't get me wrong, my parents are great and I love them both so much. But it's my older sister. We can't have a civilized conversation without her saying rude comments about me. And its about everything. I can't please her no matter what I do. Because of her I have 'low self-esteem' as people say. I agree, I guess, only because I think that everything she says is true. 'oh Jamie that outfit is hideous' or 'why are you eating that? You shouldn't, you cow.' You get the picture.

I was sobbing. I kept everything bottled in for a reason. No one knows about Alex, and no one has to. I'm breathing hard and have to stop. My chest is heaving and starting to hurt. I have exercise-induced asthma so when I run for too long without my inhaler, I get pains in my chest like a huge side stitch. I fall to my knees and place my head in my hands. I just want to be lost forever.

I stay like that for what feels like hours. The sun has already set and a breeze was picking up, making me shiver. I feel someone places a gentle hand on my shoulder. I look up. I stare into the gentle eyes of the person who made me cry in the first place, Odd. He gets down on his knees looks at me at eyelevel. Those baby blues make a fresh wave of tears slide down my cheeks. He slowly takes his free hand and gently brushes them away. His hand is so warm.

"Jamie, I am so sorry. I lost me temper and I was completely wrong. You have every right to be mad at me." His voice is so soft in gentle. I let a big sob escape from my throat. What a way to ruin the perfect scene, eh?

"I am worried about you, Red. I know you don't want to hear that right now. We want to know if your mood has something to do with what happened on Lyoko or that phone call you got. Please, I want to help." That was exactly what I wanted to hear right now. I know it wasn't something that I wanted to hear before. I look at him.

"The only way you can help right now is just to be with me." He smiled.

"I wouldn't have it any other way." And with that, he scooped me into his arms and held me until I stopped crying (which by the way was a pretty long time). His grip around my waist was gentle yet protecting, the perfect combination. I snuggled into his shoulder and he slightly tightened his grip. Le sigh.

About a half hour later I pulled away from him. I wiped away my running nose and tried up tears. Shivering slightly, I stood up and lent a hand for Odd to grab. We walked back to the school together silently. Words couldn't really express what was going on between us. Nothing romantic, but we were now closer. But how close?

Once we reached the door to my room, I turned and faced him. I must look a mess. Makeup down my face, hair disheveled, a real beauty. I smiled nonetheless

"Thanks, Odd. I just want you to know that you are the best. And though I want to tell you what has been going on, I can't. I want you to understand that. But I can tell you that you have helped in a way you wouldn't have thought." I looked into his eyes. To me, I think expression says a lot more than words ever could. Odd smiled warmly and bowed.

"Glad to be a great service to you, madamoiselle." Chuckling, I unlocked the door and made a move to go in. He grabbed my arm, making my breath catch in my throat.

"Hey, Jamie," I turned to look at him, his gaze suddenly serious, "sweet dreams alright? If you have anything to talk about, I'm always here for you. Remember that, okay?" I nod my head and walk into my room shutting the door quietly.

Sweet dreams. One of the two best words anyone could say to a person. When someone tells you to have sweet dreams, it means they really care.

Looks like Odd really cares.