Taking leave of Marymu Studios, Fern boarded a city bus and returned to her neighborhood. Her search for Buster led her to Arthur's house, where the rabbit and aardvark boys were playing computer games.

"This one's called Grand Theft Bicycle," Arthur told his friend. "The object is to steal the bikes from all the kids on the block. If they get in your way, you shoot them with spitballs."

"Cool," said Buster. "I can't wait until I'm sixteen and get to use bullets."

A discordant sound hit Arthur's ears. "D.W.!" he called out. "Cut out that racket!"

"I can't," his sister yelled back. "I have to get ready for my first piano lesson with Dr. Fugue tomorrow."

"If Dr. Fugue hears you play like that," said Arthur, "he'll tear you a new…"

"Hey, Buster," Fern interrupted.

The two boys paused their game upon seeing that the poodle girl had arrived.

"Hey, shouldn't you be at the studio?" Buster asked her.

"I quit," said Fern as she plopped down on the couch.

"Quit?" said Arthur, jumping to his feet. "Why?"

"I felt like it," said Fern with a slight shrug.

"I guess it was taking up too much of your time, huh?" said Buster.

"How did Mrs. Stiles react?" asked Arthur.

"I don't know," said Fern indifferently. "But I found a kid to replace me, and he sings as well as I do."

"He?" said Buster with surprise. "I thought Mini Moo was a girl."

"A boy doing the voice of a girl character?" commented D.W. from the piano bench. "That's just sick and wrong."

"Anyway," said Fern to Buster in a slightly seductive tone, "you and I need to turn our attention to finding my brother…I mean, Alan."

"Okay," said Buster, taking a seat next to her. "Let's start from the beginning. The Belnaps moved into the old Tibble house—a lady and her triplet girls. Amy Belnap and I became an item, until Mickie's party, where Mr. England tried to take Zeke away at gunpoint. Amy told me she was an alien, and she dragged me off to her planet, because she wanted to marry me. Then Alan, Tegan, Sue Ellen, and April came to rescue me. Sue Ellen and April had a big fight with Amy, then Alan and Tegan used some sort of weird mind powers to make me and Amy switch bodies. I was afraid I'd be stuck as a girl—not that there's anything wrong with that—because Amy didn't want to go back to her own body. But Alan had an idea. He sent Sue Ellen and April to Earth to pick up Dudley Green, who used to be a girl and wanted to be one again. So Alan and Tegan made Amy and Dudley switch bodies, and they were both happy. The next day Prunella came back, and her memory problem was fixed—but the Belnaps were gone, and so was Alan. His parents didn't even remember who he was."

Fern, who had been slowly nodding, chimed in. "It's possible someone tampered with their memories—but who would be capable of that? You said Alan and Tegan had mind powers, so they're suspects. Also, Dudley…er, Dolly used to have magical powers, so she's a suspect as well."

"And let's not forget Dark Augusta," Buster added. "Who knows if she's really dead?"

"I'm glad you don't blame everything on aliens anymore," said Fern, gazing at the rabbit boy with affection.

"Yeah," said Buster. "Meeting real aliens sorta took the fun out of it."

Mrs. Stiles greeted Wyatt with a broad smile as he left the recording booth. "You did an excellent job," she told him. "Now that Fern's out, are you available for the rest of the season?"

"I'll have to check with my moms," Wyatt replied, "but I don't imagine they'll have a problem with it. They always encourage my artistic pursuits."

"Then be here the same time tomorrow," said Mrs. Stiles, patting his shoulder. "Welcome to the Moo Crew, Wyatt."

Binky accompanied the boy as he walked toward the downtown parking garage. "I don't get why Fern quit," he mused, "but it was nice of her to bring you in."

"Yeah, I was surprised," said Wyatt. "I hadn't seen or heard from her since the audition."

"You and her don't have a thing going, do you?" asked Binky curiously.

Wyatt swallowed. "You mean…some sort of boyfriend-girlfriend thing?"

"Yeah," said Binky.

"No, we don't," said Wyatt.

"Too bad," said Binky, grinning. "She's a cool girl."

"Yeah, she is," Wyatt agreed. "But I'm not interested in girls."

"Too young for that, eh?" said Binky with a chuckle.

"No, it's not because of my age," answered Wyatt. "It's because I'm gay."

The shock almost made Binky bite his tongue.

"You're…you're gay?" he stammered.

"Uh-huh," said Wyatt calmly.

No wonder he likes pro wrestling so much, thought Binky.

"That's not a problem, is it?" said Wyatt.

"Er, no," Binky replied. "It's none of my business if you find other boys attractive." He put on a menacing glare. "Just don't find me attractive, because I have a girlfriend, and she can beat you up."

"I wouldn't dream of it," Wyatt assured him.

The two boys shared no more words as Binky followed Wyatt to the car where two women with heavily pierced ears and short hair waited. "See ya tomorrow," said Binky, waving the boy off.

I'm gonna have to work with that kid, he thought as the car drove away. I'd better ask my folks if that's all right.

Late that evening, Lisa and Professor Frink pulled to the curb at 742 Evergreen Terrace in Springfield. "Thanks for the ride, Professor," said Lisa, strapping her bag over her shoulder.

"And thank you for coming along, lab helper girl," said Frink. "I learned things about the Slinky that I never imagined. Bring a Rubik's Cube next time, will you? Ng'hoy."

"Goodbye, Professor," said Lisa. The pink sedan rolled away as she hurried to the front door of her house.

The only light she saw through the window was the television—not unusual. She entered and tiptoed into the living room. There were only two sounds—the heavy snoring of Homer and Bart on the couch, and the droning of an infomercial.

"Hi, I'm Troy McClure. You may remember me from such infomercials as Never Crack Open Another Coconut! and Stop Getting Ripped Off By Your Spiritual Leaders…"

Up the stairway she tiptoed, determined to write a few lines in her journal and then sleep restfully. While passing by the doorway to Bart's room, she noticed something odd.

Someone's in Bart's bed, she realized, but it's not Bart.

The temptation was too strong to resist—she had to know who it was. Maybe it's Milhouse, she thought as she stepped closer to the child-sized lump on the bed. Sometimes he sleeps here when he's had too many squishees. Or…could it be a girl? Does Bart have a new girlfriend? Jessica Lovejoy? Greta Wolfcastle? Sherri and Terri? Or maybe that new girl, Jenda…

Suddenly the bed's occupant bolted upright and turned to face her. "Don't do that!" the frightened boy commanded. "Don't surprise me!"

Lisa rubbed her eyes, startled at the sight of an old friend who had apparently gone many days without eating much.

"Alan?" she marveled. "Alan Powers?"

As usual…to be continued!

(A/N: Congrats to "insert brain here" for catching my Monk reference.)

(Another A/N: There will be no slash in this story.)