What If?

- Meeko Melodie

Meeko: What is up people? Good, I hope. Personally, I'm not so good because I think I just failed my chemistry and math test. Oh well! Here's the chapter, hope you like it! Oh, and Witch Hunter Robin DOES NOT belong to me, obviously.

Thanks to the following dudes and dudettes:

Jadewitch:I know it's pretty hard to convince Amon as a lawyer, but oh well! Yay, go Matrix! And I agree whole-heartedly that he IS a hottie! He-he! No denying it! Well, thanks so much for your review.

In True Meanings: OH! So that's what you're trying to say. Okay. I guess he just decided to go ahead and trust his instincts instead of his head, or just like you say: emotions got in his way. Thanks for reviewing.

Theaxeduck: Thanks! And yes, I think everybody need more time. Twenty four hours a day just doesn't cut it.

Storm: Thanks so much for your review and here I am, continuing on my story.

Kasusander-jie: Thank you!

Nightmare of fear, dream of longing;

haunting her mind night after night.

Softly touching was a stranger she does not know.

And yet, it felt so familiar.

Chapter Five: Moon and Urge

Robin opened her eyes wearily and found herself standing alone in the dark. She could see nothing, only blackness, endless of blackness. Where am I? But her instincts told her she was not in immediate danger, at least, not yet. Out of a sudden, she heard a click somewhere far off the distance and she could see a faint light lingering in the dark atmosphere. She knew it was not smart to walk towards an unknown place but the longer she stood there, the more uneasy she felt.

So picking up her nerves, she strode towards the unknown, reaching out blindly in front of and around her. Taking small, careful steps so she would not fall. The source of light grew brighter upon reaching it, she saw herself in front of an oak door. Gingerly, as if she was afraid of waking up somebody if she even make a small sound, Robin reached for the handle of the door; but sounds from the other side of the door froze her action.

Moaning, obviously from a certain female, reached Robin's ears and she could half guessed what was going on in there. But who is in there? She dared not to find out and yet, her curiousness always got the better of her. Slowly, Robin reached towards the silver handle; she felt like she was going to peek at something she shouldn't know, something forbidden. But it was as if her slim hands had their little brains on their own and she couldn't control her shaking hand.

Robin grabbed the cold metal, and the cold seeped through her skin and into her bones, causing her to shiver unconsciously. She forced down the handle and pushed the door open , allowing a crack to see the inside. On the other side of the door was a grand room, with plain white walls and raven black furniture. Everything in it was either black or white, nothing in the shades, and nothing in between.

But Robin didn't care; all she cared was that her eyes had mechanically turned to the source of the moaning noises she heard earlier. And now, she saw where the sound had come from.

Leaning on the cushions was a couple, the auburn-haired female underneath the male and their position too close for Robin to bear. But what made Robin's heart dropped was the man. The ebony haired man whom had captured her heart without her even noticing it. How can this be? She thought. But here he was, leaning into another woman's embrace.

They kissed, too passionately for Robin's heart to take up and she turned away from them, unable to witness one more second of it. She didn't know why she was feeling the way she felt right now, nor did she know how. The only thing Robin held in her mind at the moment was sadness; sadness because a man she just met a few days ago was kissing another woman. Was that even possible? After all, who was she to him anyway? Robin was only a fifteen year old kid, or at least that was how Robin presumed Amon to view her.

All of a sudden, the setting changed. Now, Robin was in the middle of a dancing fire, surrounded by the heat waves sent from the bursting flames. Facing her on the opposite end this be? Amon? His eyes cold as stone and his face held no expression at all. A gun held by Amon was pointing straight at her; straight at Robin's heart. She froze, her emerald orbs grew wide at the shock.

"No..." she murmured softly, but Amon couldn't hear her, or he just chose to ignore her. Which ever it was, he forwarded one step, and then another. Each with more death cling to it. Robin stepped back until she could no longer do that. She had reached the edge of the flames.

Amon pulled the trigger; "Amon, no," Robin wanted to shout but too late, the bullet pierced through the air and towards her beating heart.

Robin shot up from her bed, clenching her sheets tightly with her hands over her beating chest. It was hurting so much Robin thought the bullet actually pierced through her heart, when really, it was her thumping heart beat that was hurting her ribs. She breathed hard with difficulty for some few minutes.

All the things seemed woozy as she adjusted to the darkness surrounding her. She felt so alone for all of a sudden. Well, duh, she was alone; but she was never depressed by this thought before.

She sat up, propped herself against the pillow and just wandered back to her dream. It was rather strange, now that she was thinking about it. Why did she even feel that way when Amon kissed another woman? Why did she ever care? Robin did not know the answers to those questions she just posed herself, which just only made her life even more complicated than before. When she thought about the possibilities, she stopped herself before she lost control of her unconscious mind. "That is not right, it's just – not right," Robin kept chanting this repeatedly inside her head. But the more she wanted to forget, the clearer and sharper the image of Amon began to form in Robin's mind.

Yet it was so real, so painfully real when Amon shot at her. What if it was real? She thought frightfully, then claiming herself to be silly, how could he be? He's just a lawyer, right? Even the inquiry didn't sound that convincing at the moment. She hated it when there was doubt, especially when it involves her dreams.

She couldn't sleep like this. Robin sighed heavily and turned to glance at the clock that was sitting on her bedside table. But her eyes wandered to the business card that Amon gave her the first time she saw him.

Robin picked it up lightly.

"Argh! Damn phone!" Amon moaned into his pillow as his cellphone ring tone got louder.

"Who the hell could it be? It's three in the morning," Amon muttered, propping himself up on his elbows and reached for the blinking phone. He laid down again and clicked on the phone at the same time.

"This is Amon. Talk," he commanded, unwillingly let out a yawn at the same moment.

Silence followed.

"Hello?" Amon said a little louder with swearing words all set and ready on the way out of his throat.

"Amon?" a soft voice asked on the other side. That voice; Amon shot up from bed like lightning just stroke him. For a second there, he really considered yelling at her in three different languages for waking him up at this hour. But the thought passed as fast as it had came.

"Robin?" Amon wanted to make sure, though he already knew.

"Yes," she replied softly, then added apologetically, "I'm sorry to bother you this late, I don't know what came over me," she paused slightly, "maybe I should hang up."

"Don't bother,"Amon replied sharply; he was surprised at his own action. One part of him wanted to just throw away the phone and went back to sleep; but the other part, the side that overpowered him, wanted to hear this girl out.

"You've already woken me up, so it makes no difference, just tell me what you want," Amon know he sounded cranky. But hey, waking up at three o'clock by a phone call was not exactly healthy, all right?

On the other side of the phone, Robin somehow felt calmer, upon hearing Amon's voice. She didn't know what it was, but she felt so...so comfortable and soothing, talking to Amon and be with him. It made no sense at all.

When did my life become so complicated? Robin thought. Her young life had just turned gray, not black and white, or yes and no anymore. Just different shades and so many sides to the truth. It was so confusing that it was troubling Robin.

"Why did you call?" Amon's voice startled her; she totally forgot she was still talking to Amon. Robin seriously pondered on this question for she didn't know the answer even herself.

"I don't know, Amon. I really don't," Robin replied truthfully. She had put on a bathrobe and was staring out at the bedroom window. Though the night was still dark, bright lights from nearby stores still blink in the sleeping city.

Amon didn't say anything; as usual, he stayed silent.

"I just had a nightmare and I couldn't sleep," because I dreamed that you killed me, Robin wanted to add but didn't, "the first person I thought of to call is you," she confessed. Amon stayed speechless; in his heart, he could feel Robin's loneliness and hollowness. It felt so familiar, so agonizingly familiar. He had tried to ignore this feeling all his life. Why did Robin had to bring this suffocating feeling up his throat again?

"Look outside," Robin suddenly said. Amon wasn't about to argue and he half expected Robin to be standing out there.

He looked down and saw with relief that it wasn't the case.

"Do you see the moon?" Robin questioned. She stared upwards; clouds were swirling in the dark heaven, it wasn't a comforting sight.

At the other side of the phone, Amon slid open the door of his balcony; he shook slightly as the bitter wind of November slashed across his face and body.

Clouds are so thick tonight, Amon thought; though he didn't know why he was depressed by this thought.

"No," Amon replied simply.

"You do not see it," Robin began, "but it doesn't mean that it doesn't exist."

"Huh?" A pause on Robin's side.

"The clouds prevent us from seeing," she replied slowly, "but you know that somewhere high beyond the clouds, the moon is always there.

"Everyday, whether you're in the sunlight, or in the fog, you don't always notice its existence; you might even deny it but it is always there," Robin said softly, "I believe that somewhere, the moon is shining brightly, though I, myself, denied it at most times."

Amon stopped to think about what Robin meant when she said those words. He figured this fifteen year old didn't talk like a teenager at all; she was really quite a mature young woman, though nature might not showed it yet. No, Amon thought, nature does shows its forces and through her body at that. He choked slightly as he realized what he was thinking, stop it, Amon, you idiot, concentrate! Her words brought on so much feelings, like waves in an angry sea washing over his head, choking him under and preventing him from breathing; it was almost overwhelming and yet, what she had just said was so right.

He denied his emotions, his loneliness and emptiness, even his wants for so long and for once in such a long time, he had a sudden urge to let it all out.

Thank goodness it was just an urge.

Amon still kept back from this girl he had met only two times; he still held his suspicion thought he knew she meant no harm.

Robin, sitting on the window sill, still stared up at the stormy sky. She had no idea why she had burst out all those things; she guessed the things didn't really make much sense to Amon. But for all she cared, Amon was at least a good listener, or maybe he just fell asleep.

There was silence on Amon's side as he digested Robin's words.

"Amon?" Robin whispered softly. Somehow, her tone, even from a far, could reached deep into Amon's cold barrier, slowly melting it but not quite.

"Hmm?"

"You asleep?" she asked.

"Far from it," he replied, stifling a yawn. Robin giggled; she would really love to see him without his I'm-so-cool-and-cold-hearted expression and she presumed a yawning Amon wouldn't be so 'cool-looking'.

"What's so funny?" he asked sharply.

"Nothing," Robin stopped herself in time.

A pause for a really long time as Robin listened to Amon's steady and rhythmic breathing on the other side and the clicking of the second hand of the alarm clock.

Click-click-click. Time moved on.

"You better go back to sleep," Amon pronounced, "you still have school tomorrow."

"Yes," reality brought Robin back to earth. Damn reality!

"Bye," he ended briskly.

"Wait," Robin exclaimed at the last second. Amon did and held the phone closer.

"Thank you," she said.

"For what?" Amon wanted to know.

"For..." Robin thought for a second, then answered, "for listening to me, though it probably didn't make much sense to you. I'm very senseless at times." She added.

"How do you know?" Amon started to ask.

"Huh?"

"How do you know that I have no idea what you're saying?" he asked more sternly this time, "I do understand, maybe even more than you thought." There, he said it. Well, some little part of it. He had never really get this emotional with someone he just met.

It was just plain weird.

Robin was stuck for a second there, what is he trying to say?

"What are you saying?" she inquired slowly.

Amon sighed, "just ignore it."

"All right," Robin replied uncertainly but in her heart, she intended to find out.

Simple rule of curiosity.

"Good night, Robin," he concluded, tired of the whole conversation.

"Good night, Amon," she repeated.

The phone went dead.

Meeko: I know, I know. The moon part was weird, I don't even know why I wrote it. I guess I just feel like writing that down? I don't know. Anyways, what I know for sure is that this chapter is crappy but please give me the comments that I need to get through my hard life.