Authoress' Notes: It's sad, but true! Pikario & Chuigi's adventures are coming to an end! OH NO! Don't worry, though; I can still squeeze about 3 or 4 chapters out of the story, but after that, NO MORE!

Pikario & Chuigi: Poké Star Saga!

Chapter 15: Some Like It Blast Burned and Others Like It Dipped in Marinara Sauce!

So, here we are! Somewhere Down Below Thisaintabutreallyadesert Valley! Pikario was looking for his lost little brother so he could get anal sex with his girlfriend! I can't think of a better way to start off something, can you?

Pikario walked into some room and saw Chuigi tied to a pole-like thingy! He instantly ran over and slapped him, waking him up! "Rise and shine, bitch!"

"WHAT THE FUCK, MAN? I'M TRYING TO SLEEP HERE!" Chuigi shouted, pissed off!

Pikario set the rope tying Chuigi down on fire, then Chuigi went up in flames! "Shut up! Now let's get out of here! Peach's vagina is waiting for me up there!"

Chuigi sweatdropped. "And just when I thought your sexual references couldn't get any worse..."

Just then, KA-BOOM! Popple appeared!

"MWAHAHAHAHAHA! Red, I knew you'd show up! Now you shall meet your doom!" he shouted!

"I thought you said you were leaving this place once and for all..." Chuigi said!

Popple stopped laughing! "MWAHAHAHA... Oh, yeah... Well, um, I was, but I couldn't, you know, get a plane ticket to leave, so then, I went and changed my mind because I finally found someone strong enough to beat you guys! AND SHE'S A GIRl, TOO! YOU CAN NEVER DEFEAT WOMAN POWER! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Pikario shook his head. "It depends on what you mean by 'Woman Power'..."

Chuigi threw his hands up! "Pikario, shut up with the damn sexual references!"

Then, a Charmander with a pink bow on her head came out! How cute!

"Hey, what's going on in here, Poppy Pussy?" she asked!

Popple fell over! "No, damn it! Don't call me that in front of my enemies!"

The Charmander frowned! "Oh, but why? Are you cranky because you couldn't get an erection last time?"

Pikario's eyes widened! "Dude, you can't do that?"

Chuigi laughed and pointed! "What a wuss! I may be a virgin, but at least I can get an erection!"

Popple sweatdropped! "BIRDO! SHUT UP ABOUT THAT! I WAS HAVING A BAD DAY!"

"So, wanna try again?" Birdo winked!

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Popple bellowed!

Then, Birdo got an idea! "Oh, I know why! It's because these guys are making you stressed! That's why you suck in bed!"

Pikario saw his chance! "Suck what? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

"So, Birdo is a transsexual!" Chuigi added, laughing!

Popple shook his fist! "All right! That's it, see? Rookie, let's get these freaks and teach 'em not to mess with us!"

Birdo danced into battle! "Right behind you, Pussy Poo!"

Popple sweatdropped! "Why me?"

Battle Mode Start! Well, This Should Be Interesting!

Popple pointed at Chuigi! "Quick, Rookie! Attack the Green guy!"

"CHUIGI!" the Raichu reminded him!

"Okay, my little Poopy Pussy Poop Poo!" Birdo sang, dancing over to Chuigi!

Popple sighed! "Just attack already!"

Birdo used Egg Bomb on Chuigi! IT DIDN'T WORK!

Chuigi frowned! "What the hell...?"

Popple jumped up and down in a fit! "NO! NO! NO! YOUR ATTACKS ARE SUPPOSED TO WORK, NOT SUCK ASS!"

"Suck whose ass?" Pikario taunted!

Popple got mad! "I'll show you!"

Just like last time, he got out his evil bag of stuff! He started throwing money, wet condoms, TVs, tacos, and recently-bought copies of Pokémon: Emerald Version!

Chuigi caught the money, the Pokémon: Emerald Versions, the tacos, and the TVs! "Not this again! Do you even know what you're doing?"

Popple threw his bag away in a fit! "Damn it, Rookie! You gave me the wrong bag!"

Birdo shrugged! "Poopy Puss Poo, you have thousands of them! How was I supposed to know which one you wanted?"

"SILENCE!" Popple boomed! He then used Pay Day on Pikario, giving him 54,780,583,490 dollars and 94 cents, exact change!

Pikario jammed the money in his non-existent pocket! "Damn, I don't know if this guy's trying to help us or kill us!"

Popple got pissed! "I'm trying to do the latter, but nothing's fucking working against you guys!"

"Because we are invincible!" Chuigi taunted, using Thief on Popple and taking his state-of-the-art DVD Player!

"YOU CAN'T DO THAT!" Popple griped!

Birdo grabbed Popple from behind! "Don't worry, my love! I shall use my Super Awesome Attack to thwart this Red and Green guy you despise so much!"

Popple ran like mad! "NO, DAMN IT! DON'T DO THAT! REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED LAST TIME?"

"Don't worry! I promise not to make you an omelet, okay?" Birdo promised!

Chuigi's hair stood on end! "OH NO! NOT THE OMELETS! IT'S THE CHOLESTEROL! IT WILL KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEL US!"

Birdo somehow sucked up Popple and used Softboiled on him... or something! I don't know! She spit out a whole shitload of eggs! What else kind of an attack can it be?

Chuigi went over and kicked an egg with his ridiculously long feet! HE GOT ATTACKED BY CHOLESTEROL!

"GAH! OH, SHIT! HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Chuigi wailed, dancing around like an idiot!

"MWAHAHAHA! Take that! See, Pussy? I told it'd work this time!" Birdo gloated, using another Egg Bomb and completely missing, since it wasn't her turn!

Pikario used FRYING PAN! He cooked all the eggs and made a delicious omelet, full of cholesterol and SALT!

Chuigi recovered from his brutal high blood pressure assault and used... SALT! GET IT? ASSAULT? SALT? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Popple jumped out of an egg and ran around, his tail on fire! "SO MUCH FOR YOUR BRIGHT IDEA, ROOKIE!"

"And now for the grand finale!" Pikario declared!

Pikario's FRYING PAN turned the eggs GREEN, so he used HAM! The awesome combination of Green Eggs and Ham was so powerful that it killed both Popple and Birdo!

Battle Mode Completed! GREEN EGGS AND HAM ARE THE SHIT!

Seeing that he'd lost the battle, Popple smacked Birdo in the back of the head! "You IDIOT! Rookie, you made us lose! I knew that getting a horny Charmander transsexual was a bad idea!"

Birdo sat up and frowned! "Are you saying that was all my FAULT?"

Popple rolled his eyes! "Um, lemme think! YEAH!"

Then for no apparent reason, Birdo evolved into a Charmeleon, then a Charizard!

Popple freaked out! "Damn! How the hell did you do that?"

"All thanks to the fact that the Almighty Authoress likes to see you get your ass kicked and I couldn't do as well otherwise!" Birdo explained, using the Almighty Blast Burn attack that you can only get in the Fire Red/Leaf Green Versions and blowing Popple out of the cave!

"Looks like Popple's blasting off AGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIN!" the Meowth shouted, sounding almost like all 3 Team Rocket members!

Birdo tightened her claws! "Yes! I did it! I overcame my possessor and I won, too! Now, that I'm a Charizard, I can burn down peoples' houses and get away with it, while also inexplicably looking for a new boyfriend!"

"Yeah, and why don't you go and hang yourself while you're at it?" Chuigi spat!

"GRRRRRRRRRRROWL... and stuff!" Birdo used the Almighty Blast Burn attack that you can only get in the Fire Red/Leaf Green Versions on Chuigi and flew away!

Sometime Later!

Pikario & Chuigi made it back to the main town, only to see that it was completely and totally destroyed, just like last time!

Chuigi sighed. "Not again..."

Pikario walked off! "Do these guys liked being killed, or something?"

So, Pikario & Chuigi went to the castle! YAY!

Pikario looked around! "Okay, Peach! I saved Chuigi, so can we have sex now?"

Queen Where fell out of nowhere, almost crushing Chuigi! "Pikario! Chuigi! It seems that the town is being ambushed!"

"Oh, yeah, what gave that away? The constant onslaught of bombs outside? The random Bulbasaurs running around on fire? Or maybe it was the fact that you were just on the roof, or something?" Pikario asked, sarcastically!

"Actually, I was trying to fix the damn satellite dish! It's not my fault we got attacked while I was doing that!" the Queen retorted!

Lady Luna then appeared, with Shroomsworth behind her, looking very horny!

"My Queen, it seems that Bowser's Flying Castle Thingy is responsible for this madness!"

Shroomsworth cleared his throat! "Of course, I had to tell her that, because she thought all that booming was me in the bed!"

Queen Where sweatdropped! "Repulsive!"

Then, Prince Peasley showed up! "Fear not, mother! For I shall depart and make my way to Boswer's Castle and show him what happens when he attacks our fair city when we're trying to watch indecent cable programs on TV!"

"Fine then, but I still think you're gay," the Queen added!

Without another word, Peasley flew off, not to be seen again until next chapter or possibly the one after next!

Pikario threw his hands up! "I don't care about this! I want Peach and I want her now!"

"Hi, Pikario!" Peach greeted, walking in! "In case you're wondering how to get to Bowser's Flying Castle Thingy, you have to use the HM 02, which is Fly, on Blahblahblahnandon, who, coincidentally, is right here!"

Blahblahblahnandon sipped some tea! "I just came for the fucking cookies and milk!"

"That's great! Now, can we go have sex?" Pikario asked!

"Sure, but don't forget to save the world afterwards!" Peach reminded him!

Pikario dragged her into the back room! "Whatever!"

Chuigi sweatdropped! "So... who wants to play charades?"

"Ooh! Does it involve nudity in strange and disturbing ways?" Shroomsworth asked!

"Uh... sure, gramps..." Chuigi replied, shrugging!

Authoress' Notes: W00t! Not only do I have another chapter finished, but school's getting out tomorrow! (Well, really on Friday, but I ain't going) Oh, and sorry if this chapter was too short; I wanted Pikario & Chuigi to enter Bowser's Flying Castle Thingy at the beginning of the next chapter, so that's why. Anywho, it's all good and stuff! See ya next time!