Chapter 2: At G.R.O.S.S.
(Calvin and Hobbes are at a G.R.O.S.S. meeting in their tree-platform.)
Calvin: And so we must defeat the snobby little kid who is nothing but an obstacle to our club!
Hobbes: He will soon be defeated by the powerful G.R.O.S.S.!
Calvin: Good. I've written down a plan. Come read it.
(Hobbes and Calvin analyze the plan.)
Calvin: Brilliantly simple, huh?
Hobbes: Sounds great to me. Let's put it into practice!
Calvin: Okay!
(Calvin puts a tape into his portable tape recorder and it starts to play some Guns 'N' Roses. )
Calvin: I bet this is really going to annoy him!
Hobbes: He lives next door, right?
(Calvin's play seemed to work, until Wolfie came to the window and closed it with some kind of strange rubber-like substance.
Calvin: Hey! What's that!
Hobbes: That seems like sound isolating substance. If you use that, you won't be able to hear anything from the outside. He must use it to practice the piano.
Calvin: Hmm… So noise ain't gonna work. Tricky…
(Calvin and Hobbes think for a few minutes, until Hobbes appears to get an idea.)
Hobbes: Why don't we use the other enemy!
Calvin: What? I don't get it.
Hobbes: Well, we have two enemies: girls, Susie in particular, and Wolfie. Right?
Calvin: Well…Yeah.
Hobbes: And Susie's got a very notorious crush on Wolfie, right?
Calvin: Right…
Hobbes: So…
(Hobbes tells Calvin the rest of his plan.)
Calvin: Hobbes, you're a genius!
Hobbes: Can I have a tuna sandwich for reward?
Calvin: I suppose you deserve it. Let's go to the kitchen.
Hobbes: Hooray!
Calvin: Then, we're gonna put your plan into practice…
(Half an hour later, Calvin was knocking at Susie's door. Strangely, there was also a piano playing inside. Susie's mom answered the door.)
Calvin: Hi, Mrs. Derkins. Is Susie in? I would like to talk to her.
Mrs. Derkins: Yes, she's in her room. Come up, please.
Calvin: Thanks. Follow me, Hobbes!
(Calvin and Mrs. Derkins climb up the stairs up to the closed door of Susie's room.)
Mrs. Derkins: Susie, Calvin is here to see you. Can he come in?
(Susie replies after a long silence.)
Susie: Alright. Make it quick.
(Calvin comes in, holding Hobbes. Susie is lying in her bed listening to a piano record.)
Susie: I feel like if he's around me…Tell me, Calvin, did you hear him play today in the music room? It was awesome!
Sarcastic Calvin: Who? Ray Charles?
Susie: Wolfie! He played a piece called Turkish Rondo. He told me the Rondo was an old peasant dance…
Calvin: Suits you fine.
(Susie looks at Calvin menacingly.)
Calvin: Say, Susie…How do you feel about going to Wolfie's house and hear him play? You could even talk to him! It could be fun, huh?
(Susie looks hipnotized again.)
Susie: Really? Great idea! I'm going there right now!
(Susie leaves her room in a rush, without even turning off the record. Calvin smiles in an evil way.)
(Ding Dong! The Dunkel's bell rings. Mrs. Dunkel opens the door. Because of the sound isolating material, no one is able to hear Wolfie study.)
Susan: Hello, Mrs. Dunkel! Is Wolfie in? I would sure like to hear him play!
Mrs. Dunkel: Oh, sorry about that. Wolfie likes to be alone while he studies. That's why he uses sound isolating material.
(Susie seems heartbroken.)
Susie: Really?
Mrs. Dunkel: Yes. He doesn't interact much. He only likes the piano.
Susie: You know, he played in the music room today in school, during recess! It was great! He plays like a piano teacher!
Mrs. Dunkel: Oh, he's way beyond that level!
(Mrs. Dunkel has a proud look on her face.)
Mrs. Dunkel: His piano teacher had to quit last year because Wolfie had gone better than him! I still can't believe it! But if you want, you can come see his concert tomorrow night! He's playing with the Professor Garçon Orchestra from the music school, you know? Yes. Mozart's 25th Piano Concerto! It is wonderful!
Susie: Really? Thank you! I hope he gives me an autograph later…
(Now Mrs. Dunkel acts really cocky.)
Mrs. Dunkel: Don't worry: he already signs thousands every day. Cheerio!
(Mrs. Dunkel closes the door. Susie looks hipnotized again. She stays for ten minutes in the backyard staring at Wolfie's closed window. Calvin had been watching everything from the top of his tree.
Calvin: She's going to the concert…Mmm…So can we! We can go hackle his concert and ruin it!
Hobbes: Great idea!
Calvin: Ha! His glory is about to end!
Hobbes: In the meanwhile, can I have another tuna sandwich?
Calvin: No!
(What will happen in the night of the concert? Will Susie be able to stop Calvin? Or will Wolfie's reputation be damaged? Stay tuned for the next chapter of Calvin and Hobbes in: The Wolfie Boy!)