Hey guys, thanks for all the great reviews. It has been really supportive. I'm glad you all like the plot. I wanted to do something a bit different, because I was sick of Harm being strong for Mac. Let him have some problems! I guess it is highly unlikely that Harm would kill himself, but I thought it could work.

This chapter is pretty Clay/Mac but not in a nice, romantic way. Have fun.

Disclaimer: I do not own or have any ties to Bellasario Productions or the characters of JAG.

Bethesda Gardens

1400h

As the tears finally started to thin, Mac looked up at her surroundings. She was sitting in a rose garden. Great! She was about to come full circle. She would lose Harm in the same manner as they had met.

"Damn it Mackenzie, don't think like that. He is going to pull through." The positive voice said.

"Yeah, he may be physically fine, but mentally…" The little voice of doubt highlighted.

"SHUT UP!" Sarah Mackenzie couldn't deal with the warring consciences. Her best friend, who so obviously loved her, was lying in surgery. Strangers were trying to save him for a life that he didn't want to live. Mac made a promise then, she would be there when he woke up. She would be right next to him, where she was most needed, like he had been so many years before.

She would teach him to trust, to love and slowly piece his soul back together. He had failed her, but she had also failed him. Life was full of disappointments; she had learnt this the hard way. He had called out for help so extremely, she would answer that call.

Because no matter how deep she buried her heart, no matter how many walls she built around her soul, he had found a way in. He was a part of her and couldn't let that go, let him go, because she loved him to.

"Hey Sarah!" Clay had been wandering through the gardens looking for Sarah. He knew she hadn't wanted to see him before, but she had had time to read her letter.

"Clay, didn't I tell you to leave me alone." Mac was raw; she really didn't want to deal with Webb at the moment.

"I know Sarah, but now you have made peace with Harm I thought you might need someone to talk to." By the time he had finished this sentence he had one arm around her shoulders and was moving to kiss her on the check.

"Webb, what part of leave me the hell alone didn't you get?" Mac slipped out of his grasp and was now yelling at him from two metres away.

"Look Sarah, I know you're hurting but Rabb wouldn't have wanted you to be upset. He told me that you had chosen me and I had to look after you. That's what I am here to do." Clay kept trying to get close but Mac kept backing away.

"Webb, listen to me and listen well. I didn't choose you. I thought I didn't have a choice. You were there and Harm wasn't. Oh by the way that is his name HARM not Rabb. Anyway, I didn't know he was an option, but now I do I'm changing my choice." Mac was shaking with anger and pain. Harm had thought she truly loved Clay and he had let her go.

"Sarah, you don't mean that. Harm is probably going to die. You can't change that, you have to let him go. Come home with me. You know you love me. We can take vacations anytime you want, I can buy you all the things you never had." Clay needed for her to understand that she needed him.

"He is not going to die. Look I don't want to go with you. You're not what I want. I don't care about vacations or presents. What about marriage, children, growing old together? Did you even think about my feelings when you decided that I needed you?" How dare he! She knew he wasn't the most loving person on the planet, but she had never expected this.

"Sarah you know I don't want marriage or children. If you love me you would accept this. I did think of your feelings. In Paraguay you kissed me and since then we have got very close. I was there when no one else was. I got tortured to protect you. Sarah please, come home with me." Webb couldn't understand her change in attitude. She was in debt to him, she had to love him.

"I'm going to say this once and for all. I love Harm. He was there for me when no one else was, not you. Yes we went through an extremely traumatic experience together, but that didn't make me fall in love with you. Yes you were tortured to protect me. God I am so grateful for that, but Clay I don't love you the way I do Harm. He is my life, tied to me in more ways than you can possibly imagine. Yes I do love you, but in a friendly, thankful way. I was so caught up in trying to love you I forgot the two most important people in my life, Harm and myself. To find happiness we need to be together, like we have been for the last eight years. I don't know if you can understand that, but you are going to have to accept it. I love Harm, and we have wasted so much time waiting and wondering. When he wakes up, and he will, I am going to be there. We are going to get our happy ending." Mac had pulled on her best marine façade, Clay needed to be told and she didn't want him to miss a word.

"But Sarah! We had such a good time together." Clayton Webb just couldn't understand her feelings on this subject.

"Webb, there is no way in hell that I am leaving this hospital with you, don't even try it. I love Harm and you can not change that. Leave now, before I have to physically remove you from these grounds, and I will." Didn't he get the fact she didn't want him.

"If that's the way you feel about, then I guess we're through. Go back to your flyboy, but don't come crawling to me when it doesn't work out." Webb wasn't really upset about losing Sarah, when he thought about she really was quiet troublesome, but why did it have to be Rabb!

"Just leave, Webb. No one here needs you. Go find someone who you can be happy with what you're offering. Just please leave me in peace." She could believe she had ever thought she loved that man.

Clayton Webb knew when to make a strategic retreat. This was one of those times. He turned on his heel and left the crying marine behind him. She could go to her 'flyboy' he didn't need to hang around to watch Rabb die.

"Thank God, he finally left." Mac thought as she watched the retreating back of the spook. Now I just have to go wait for Harm to get out of surgery.

So Mac left the rose garden, her heart considerably lighter than when she had entered. She was back in marine mode, focused on a single goal. Finding Harm and convincing him he hadn't failed her.