Chapter Twenty-five
She had just said she loved him he hadn't misheard her. He knew she cared about him and he knew she loved sex with him, but there were a thousand other transgen males she could have enjoyable sex with and probably grow to care about. She'd definitely said it he hadn't misheard her and surely she knew that telling him she loved him meant much more than just enjoying him fucking her? Did he dare to believe that she did and this wasn't just more of the emotional and hormonal turmoil she'd been in since her heat?
Less than three months ago she had been in love with Logan. He thought back to her willingness to do anything Logan asked without question, the way she had hung on his every word, her endless irrational defence of Logan whenever he'd criticized or tried to stop Logan sending her off alone on some of his rasher missions.
Then, he'd been the selfish immature, irritating transgenic she resentfully tolerated because he was her only link to her own kind. She hadn't given a stuff a about him then and he had always accepted that, accepted that she loved Logan and therefore he himself hadn't even featured on her list of priorities.
He couldn't behave like Logan, even if he had wanted too. What did Max know about loving someone like him? Someone as possessive and demanding and as instinct driven as he was? She appeared to have accepted that Dale had killed to protect what was his, but how understanding would she have been had that been him? How accepting would she have been if Biggs and the rest of his Unit hadn't forcibly prevented him from killing Logan when he had touched her at Jam Pony. Not very, he concluded.
If she hadn't tried to tell him last night that she'd always cared for him, and more than she'd ever had cared for Logan, then he might have accepted her words at face value. Believed that she'd fallen in love with him. Momentarily he closed his eyes in pleasure relishing the joy of it. However that wasn't what had happened, instead she'd rewritten their entire history and she was now trying to tell him she would have mated with him, when shed been in love with Logan, rather than let Zack and him fight for her.
Just last night she'd been intending to leave him without explaining why, and yet within the space of a few minutes she'd changed her mind again, also without explanation. Now she was telling him she loved him. He didn't believe it. He'd like to, but it just wouldn't be sensible. Morosely he stared sightlessly at the maps spread across his desk. It was obviously just more of the emotional turmoil the changes in her life and her hormones had wrought in her over the last three months.
He really liked the way things were between them, he loved the fact that he could make her smile and that she was happy with him. Yet he'd be a liar if he denied he didn't want more, because he did. He wanted her to love him. If she loved him he knew that he would feel a lot more secure about everything. It would mean she wouldn't leave him without explanation, or leave him for someone else, or to go back to Logan. It also meant that she'd want to keep him around to protect his child.
He loved her and the life they were making together and he wanted her to feel the same way. If she loved him it would make her more tolerant of him when he screwed up, or when he did something she didn't approve of, and he particularly needed and wanted that reassurance. Sensing her outside his eyes went to the door.
"Hey," she said quietly, closing his office door.
Her chest was tight with nervousness as she walked around his desk and stopped hesitantly in front of him. He swung his chair around and his eyes were uncertain as they met hers. Silently he held her gaze and she struggled unsuccessfully for something to say.
She loved him, and she had told him, and he didn't believe her. That he didn't wasn't a surprise, she had known when she'd told him that he wouldn't accept it at face value. She held his gaze as she straddled him and settled herself on his lap. She could feel his tension as he waited, his eyes roaming her face. Her hand unconsciously fiddling with his belt buckle as she silently returned his stare. When he looked at her like this, his expression giving no inkling to what he was thinking, it made her nervous. Her eyes momentarily fell from his before she willed them back.
He could feel her tension as she starred back at him uncertainly. His eyes fell to her mouth as she gnawed her bottom lip, something she often did when she was worried or nervous and he felt a wave of overpowering tenderness for her. Her eyes momentarily wavered before returning to his.
"I, I wanted you to know how I felt Alec. I know you don't believe me bu-."
"Yes I do Max," he lied, suddenly desperate for her not to say it again.
He didn't want to hear it until she knew what she was saying, until he knew she meant it, until he could say it back to her.
"Yyou do," she stammered back.
It was the first time he had ever lied to her about anything important. Quickly he pushed aside his feeling of panic as he watched a slow smile of spread across her face. Who would have thought that he'd ever be responsible for bringing such innocent delight to Max's face? It was times like this that he loved her the most. Smiling down at her thinking that at least he had made her happy again, he closed out his guilt and pushed down his inexplicable feeling of sadness.
He believes me, he really believes me. Momentarily overcome with the joy of it she nearly missed the flash of guilt that fleetingly shadowed his eyes. She struggled to keep the smile fixed on her face as she felt the knot of regret and pain in her stomach. She knew he didn't believe her. She put her arms around his neck and felt him tense as she rested her chin on his shoulder so he couldn't see her face. Determinedly she squeezed back her tears.
He'd only lied to her because he didn't want to hurt her, and she was going to pretend she believed him because she didn't want to hurt him. Her vision blurring she swallowed a lump of painful emotion as she felt him nuzzle her ear. Closing her eyes she turned her face toward him. Gently her covered her mouth with a kiss that melted her with its tenderness. She ruthlessly suppressed the ache of need she had to make him understand that she did love him.
This is enough she told herself. Lifting her head so they were eye to eye she smiled sweetly and careful of his ribs, pressed her body along the length of his, her breast against his chest and her hot heat against the hard length of his erection. It was hard keeping her eyes open as his warm hand pulled her more securely against him and he rubbed his fingers sensuously along the delicate ridges of her spine.
Their mouths were so close that when he breathed out she was breathing his air. It was so intimate. Darting her tongue out she brushed it across his full lower lip. He made that deep sexy sound low in his throat as he parted his lips over hers and slid his tongue into her mouth. She opened willingly and his tongue lightly caressed hers.
The sound she made as she opened her mouth fired his blood and he deepened the kiss until it was a hot wet all consuming mating of mouths and tongues. Through the haze of passion she gave thanks that no matter what else was happening she could always connect with him like this.
Slowly, tenderly she released his lip to stare at him smiling in satisfaction as he returned her gaze his eyes full of passion, promise and heat. Her eyes fell to his mouth and she couldn't stop her husky moan of frustration as unable to stop herself she rubbed the pad of a finger over his lip.
"I want to, Alec, but we can't. It will only hurt you," she whispered, her disappointment in her voice.
Cupping her face he stoked her cheek with his thumb. Her skin felt like warm silk. He still had the sweet taste of her on his tongue and her eyes were hot and hungry on his. When she wanted him like he wanted her, he knew she was his. He felt a familiar primal surge of possession as his eyes held hers.
"You're mine Max," he placed his splayed hand on her abdomen. "Both of you." Her hand immediately covered his and she stared raptly back at him her heart beating wildly against her ribs. When he claimed her like this, she always felt he was telling her he loved her.
"Yes," she agreed, her voice low and husky and her heart full. She loved him deeply and irrevocably she had no doubt about that and one day she'd be able to show him.
"Do you want me, Max? Never mind about my ribs. Right now, do you want me?"
His hand still cupped her face and his thumb traced her jaw with an aching tenderness.
Her eyes roamed his face and every last one of her senses clamoured for him.
"Yes," she whispered, turning her lips into the palm of his hand.
Mine. His smile was slow, knowing and satisfied as his eyes once again roamed her face.
He dipped his head to her, "I –want – you- to - Maxie," he whispered between kisses, "we just have to go carefully that's all." His voice was husky and low and his breathe tickled as he kissed the tender spot behind her ear.
"Yes," she agreed breathily, he hadn't even done anything yet and already she was struggling to form a coherent thought. The sound of her own heart beating was loud in her ears and her breasts were already heavy her nipples swollen and aching. Her legs were spread wide as she sat astride him, and when one of his hands fell to her ass and he pulled her more tightly against the hard throb of his arousal she felt her bodies immediate surge of wet appreciation.
Sliding his hands up underneath her tee shirt he deftly undid her bra and when she cooperatively raised her arms he pulled her tee shirt and bra over her head and dropped them beside his chair. Her eyes were cloudy with desire and his were hot and heavy as he held her gaze his hands now busy undoing her pants.
His hands on her waist he pushed her backwards as he stood. He smiled as her lush mouth formed a quick sulky pout of disappointment and she frowned her surprised displeasure. Stepping into her he smoothed his hand along the full curve of her waist and dipping his head he nibbled her ear.
"The door Max, I'm just gonna lock the door," he whispered, pulling her earlobe gently with his teeth.
Her hand went to his head and she titled her head back wantonly.
"I'll be right back," he murmured his voice rough against the long smooth column of her throat. Gently he disengaged her hand from his neck and smiling contentedly at her pout of annoyance he let her go. He locked the door and his eyes once again on hers he made his way back to her. Kneeling in front of her he bent to remove her boots only to find one of her hands on his shoulder and the other on the side of his face. His head came up and his questioning eyes flew to hers.
"I've missed making love with you Alec, even though it's only been two days."
She had that look, a mixture of affection, hot heat, and trust. He loved it when she looked at him like that. Arrested, he gazed back registering what she had said. She'd just said she missed making love with him, not missed sex with him. Slowly, doubtfully he searched her face. Did that mean she felt like he did when they had sex?
His lips curved slowly. "Is that what we do, Max, make love?" he asked, his voice low and gritty. Dipping his head he slid her boots off.
His question penetrated the dreamy haze of her desire and she looked down at him as he as he peeled her pants down her legs.
"Yeah," she answered softly without hesitation, as she stepped out of her pants. His eyes touched hers for a moment as he slid her panties down her legs.
"That's what we've always done, Alec right from the start."
He stood up and she moved into him and pushed his shirt up his body. He grabbed it by the back of the neck and careful of his ribs pulled it over his head. He sat down again and immediately straddling him she turned her attention to unfastening his belt. Sensing his mood change her hands stilled on his jeans and her eyes found his, an impish smile tugging at the corners of her mouth as she held his now thoughtful gaze.
Was it true, all this time had she been making love to him, just as he had been to her? Pensive green eyes gazed into laughing brown.
Sex was a strong connection for them and for Alec it was the link that he thought bound them. If she'd known right from the start he cared about her because of the way he made love to her, then it would stand to reason he might make the same connections. It had been as easy as that to start him thinking. Why the hell didn't I think of it before?
She glanced down at his mouth and unable to help herself she touched her lips to his, his hand came up and cupped her face and he tilted her head back. His kiss was hot, hungry and sensual and he kissed her until she had to drag her mouth off his to get air back into her lungs.
Alec could feel her warm breathe on his neck as she covered his throat with hot wet kisses. His eyes drifted closed as she thoroughly and unhurriedly explored his senses. With Max it was as if she enjoyed giving him pleasure, enjoyed touching him as much as he enjoyed her. Yeah, she was right, he supposed it was making love what they did, it had never been just about sex for either of them. He'd done her an injustice thinking it had been, he acknowledged remorsefully. With her it was always so very different from the hot, hard, uninvolved sex he'd been used to. He didn't really know why but he'd developed a knot in his belly.
Kissing him one last, lingering time she pulled back her eyes soft, her smile sultry and full of promise.
He felt the knot tighten. Uncertainly he returned her gaze "So you love me then, Max?" She heard the hesitant doubt and the mixture of longing and wariness in his voice as he held her gaze.
"Yeah, I do." She smiled into the frowning intensity of his eyes her hand tender as she stroked the side of his face.
"I do," she whispered again.
Fleetingly she brushed warm and feather soft lips across his. He pushed her untidy hair away from her face and cupping her jaw he tilted her mouth up to his. Her eyes fluttered closed as he slanted his mouth over hers. His kiss was hot and hard yet soft and tender and she wondered how it could be both. Slanting her lips out from under his she gently pulled his lower lip between her teeth, and kissed the corner of his mouth before sliding her tongue back across his lips.
When she touched him it was so different from the way anyone else had ever touched him. Hearing the small, satisfied, content sound she made in the back of her throat he knew she was as helplessly enthralled as he was, and for the first time his heart started to believe that she did indeed love him. His gaze fell to her small, neat, voluptuous body. She was so beautiful. He traced her nipple with his finger and his eyes flew back to hers as she made a small sound of need, and so responsive. Again he teased her puckered nipple and watched her eyes flutter lazily. Hot with desire for her he bent his head and replaced his touch with his mouth.
Wantonly Max arched into him as he opened his mouth over her swollen nipple. She could hear her own small sounds of pleasure as he teased, licked and suckled her. Cradling his head to her breast she thought she could probably cum from just having him do this.
He was unable to keep the grin from his face when she moaned in disappointment as he released her nipple. Her hazy desire filled eyes caught his grin. Scooting backwards on his thighs she smiled wickedly back and resumed undoing his pants. He lifted his hips and she pulled them down and let them pool at his feet.
She sat back down on him and he watched her absorbed face, intense with concentration as she alternatively stroked both her hands along his hard length. She loved doing this, loved the warm, hard, silky steel of him in her hands, and she loved the low sexy sounds of appreciation he made.
Smiling in satisfaction she looked into his face. His eyes were hot on hers and his face tight and intent as she slowly closed her hand around him and stroked along his pulsing length. His head fall back onto his shoulders as he groaned low in the back of his throat. No grin now, she thought smugly as she bent over him and kissed the tip, eliciting another tortured groan of pleasure.
Alec inhaled sharply as she eased his length between her full lush lips engulfing him deeper and deeper as she swirled her tongue around him. His blood roared through his veins and he couldn't think his conscious narrowed to Max and the wet heat of her mouth.
"I want to be inside you," he breathed huskily.
Max wanting the same sat up quickly. His hand slid down her back sliding down to cup her ass as he pressed her against his hot hard body. She put her arms over his shoulders and slid her breasts against his chest. She could feel the hot hard pulsing tip of him between her legs. Her blood was zinging through her veins and her nipples were hard and tight with need. She heard her own long slow moan of delight as she guided him into her and she felt him slide home. Hands around her waist pulled her fully down onto him and she again heard her own contented sigh of pleasure.
As she thrust against him and he grunted deep in his throat, his sound melded with hers as she started to move on him. Careful of his ribs she thrust herself down. His face tight with need he held her eyes as he jerked her waist down and she continued to move matching her downward thrusts with the movement of his hands on her waist. He slid his hand between their bodies and found her clit and she heard herself gasp as he stroked her once, twice and then vaguely through the haze of her own gripping pleasure as she started to shudder into her climax she heard his deep grunt of satisfaction as he found his own release.
He slid his hand between their bodies and found her clit and she gasped as he stroked her once, twice and then his name on was on her lips and her body became an endless wave of sensation, vaguely through the haze of her own gripping pleasure she heard his deep grunt of satisfaction as he found his own release.
She clung to him reluctant to let him go her body still trembling as he stroked her hair. "I want our bed, with you in it," he growled against her ear, his arms warm and strong around her.
"Yeah," she murmured, resting contentedly against him, and as his mouth closed over hers she wished whole-heartedly that was indeed where they were.
He was kissing her again when the banging on the door finally penetrated their haze of desire.
"What the fuck?" Impatiently he released her mouth. He glanced towards the door and then quickly back to Max.
Disorientated and pouting grumpily at his abandonment she petulantly pulled his head back down to hers.
"Wait a minute Max," he laughed against her lips, "Let me see what they want first."
"What?" he barked, bending his head to quickly brush his lips across hers.
"We've got enemy soldiers in our zone." Steve called rattling the door handle again.
Alec's head shot up, "Fuck, what? Are we under attack?"
He caught the flash of shock in Max's eyes before she scrambled off his lap in search of her clothes.
"No it's only a couple of units, sixty soldiers maybe, looks like a recon."
"Okay, give me a minute," Alec shot back as he fastened his pants, his eyes on Max as she struggled into hers.
"What do you think they want?" worriedly her eyes found his.
"Just what Steve said probably just a recon. The mate fight was very noisy. We've been expecting that someone would come to investigate it. Anyway we knew we wouldn't be able to remain hidden here for very much longer," he shrugged.
"It's amazing we've managed it so far," he added marvelling at the truth of it. Their contingent was over five thousand strong now, not by any means an easy number to conceal even within the toxic confines of TC. It was tribute to their training that they'd managed to do it so far.
"Will the units in the mission tonight still go out Alec?"
"Yeah, we go," he told her decisively. No reason to hold back because of a recon team."
"Yeah, but we don't know if they are a recon team yet."
"It doesn't matter what they are, we go tonight irregardless."
Suddenly becoming aware of his inclusion of himself her shocked eyes swung to his. "What do you mean, we? You aren't fit for active Alec, you can still barely move comfortably. Steve is commanding the mission tonight its already been decided," she reminded him in panic. Her sense of dread growing she watched his face close. His eyes were now cold and his expression blank as he returned her stare.
"You aren't fit Alec," she insisted stubbornly as she preceded him out the door.
"I didn't say I was, but I decide, not you, Max. You don't interfere in military decisions," he added terse and impatient, as they made their way across to Command.
"I'm not interfering in anything military," she snapped back. "I'm just objecting to a stupid suggestion from my still injured mate that he might be fit for active when he obviously isn't," she finished angrily.
He ignored her. She felt her irritation growing as she watched him make his way stiffly across to the monitors Steve, Biggs and Dix were clustered around. How the hell could he even think of going anywhere like that? Frustrated, her eyes lit on Kat, Leah and the rest of the alpha females on her management team as they huddled around a map-spread table.
"What's up Max?" Kat asked curiously.
"Alec thinks he's going on the mission tonight, he can hardly move but he thinks he's fit for the field." Stupid macho jerk she finished silently in her head.
"He won't go if he's not fit he'd never endanger the others, Max. If it was Steve I'd just humour him," Kat added shrugging.
" Yeah," Max agreed, feeling her sense of dread disappearing as she saw the sense of it. Alec wouldn't go if he were going to be a liability she reasoned. She'd just over reacted again. It was just that nagging fear she had that she didn't deserve the happiness she'd found with him, and like all the good things in her life something would happen and she would loose him. This was separate from the day-to-day fear of White and the others who hunted them but the combination of the two meant fear for his safety was never far from her conscious.
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"What's happening Todd?" Max asked taking in the bustle of activity in the warehouse as the individual units armed up for the mission.
"Almost ready to go now," Just waiting for Dale's unit to sign off on their equipment and we'll be on the road.
"Yeah, Alec said Dale's unit was a specialist unit. What exactly do they do?"
" They're all trained for different things but their overall purpose is to disable or sabotage the enemies support services. Things like water and sewerage, communications equipment, radio and TV and stuff like that. Manticore used units like Dale's to eliminate civilian resistance."
Max watched Dale and Leah as they inventoried and packed equipment into the four vans providing the transportation. She knew that the mission tonight was to hit the reservoirs and water treatment plants in Seattle with a view to installing override programs into their computer systems so that they not only had control of an essential resource the enemy withhold from they also had the means to bring Seattle to a stand still if they needed to. Essential if the wider plan to seize control of Seattle, seal it off from the outside world and operate it as an independent transgenic nation was to succeed.
The enormity of Alec's intent hit Max as she watched the activity around her. Not just the extent of the plan although the scope of that was mind blowing in itself but the sheer scale of the operation. In less than three months Alec had not only managed to feed, train, equip and conceal five thousand transgenics who were being hunted to extinction, but also he had done so in the midst of a major city.
The plan in itself was simple. They had two teams who were each working on alternate nights over the next two weeks hitting the water treatment and sewerage, plants, telephone facilities and numerous other service installations. They were also installing their own override programmes in all the radio and TV substations.
Max watched apprehensively as members of the explosives team carefully loaded two large metal boxes into the back of each of the vans. This was the part of the plan that she didn't like. Inside the boxes were remote controlled charges that were to be concealed around strategic facilities. The water plants being judged as crucial were all receiving charges. Alec had explained it was insurance, bargaining power in case they needed it.
"I'll rest a lot easier when the last of those babies has been permanently located," Todd said, as they watched the last box being carefully loaded.
Max's attention wandered to Leah talking to Dale and obviously hassled about something.
"Todd's eyes followed hers, "She's been hassling him all day. It doesn't seem to bother him but it's nearly driven Tav and me mad. It isn't his fault he has to go without her tonight. He's only following orders." Exasperated he rolled his eyes thinking he'd never understand what the attraction was to being mated
"She's just worried about him Todd," Max snapped, thinking how worried she was going to be when Alec was fit enough again to be going without her. "At least she's in the back up Unit." Which is more than I'll be. Worried again she scanned the warehouse for Alec.
"No backup Units on this Max. Mission status has been upgraded because of the enemy recon in our zone. Only combat units in the field. That's what Leah's been moaning about. The rest of them too," Todd added gesturing expansively, and for the first time Max noticed the disgruntled, worried faces of the women scattered around the warehouse.
For the first time Max noticed the disgruntled, worried faces of the women scattered around the warehouse. She caught Tav, out the corner of her eye as he came through the main doors. Out the corner of her eye she caught Tav, coming through the main doors. He paused on his way over to Steve jerking his head at a couple of X males leaning indolently against one of the transport vehicles. After a short exchange the X's hurriedly departed.
Along with Todd, Max reached Steve at the same time as Tav.
"The mission has been upgraded to critical," Tav bit out bluntly. Both teams move tonight and every night until it's done. I've just sent Dex and Tony to mobilise the other team, you'll all be going out together. Where's Leah?" he tacked on distractedly scanning the warehouse. Catching Leah's eye he beckoned her over.
"Did they penetrate," Steve asked tersely.
" Yeah, we left them alone until they breached the first perimeter then we turned them back. At least we've managed to get full armour for sixty more soldiers, Alec, sent them home in their underwear," Tav laughed. "It means we're no longer a secret and we're now on full alert," he added more soberly.
"Any trouble?" Todd asked.
"No casualties just a few ruffled feathers," Tav grinned, recalling their furious faces and the ridiculous sight they'd made gingerly picking there way across the rubble in their bare feet and underwear.
"Sir," Leah said snapped to attention in front of Tav. Dale following behind nodded a watchful greeting.
"Armour up, Leah, the missions timeframes have been advanced, both teams go together tonight and then every night until the operation is competed."
As Tav started to unstrap his own gear for her Max caught Leah's quick grin of triumph.
Dale's flat hard, "No." Brought both Tav's and Steve's eyes snapping to him.
"Are you disobeying a direct order?" Tav barked back his eyes hard and cold on the other transgenic.
"You don't outrank me in military matters Tav and you don't give orders to my unit," Dale shot back his eyes cold and deadly as they locked with Tav's.
"Permission to speak Sir," Leah asked Tav.
"No," Dale snapped tersely his eyes never leaving Tav's.
Seeing indignant, furious colour flood Leah's face and understanding exactly how she felt Max stoically resisted the urge to roll her eyes as Tav and Dale belligerently faced each other down. So much for Alec telling her the two of them had been good friends since they were children.
Max's attention went to Alec as he came in the main doors and headed towards them. She watched his eyes narrow as he took in the aggressive standoff between Dale and Tav.
"The placement of these charges is critical and you two are the best explosive experts we have, we need the two of you now that both teams are going out together. You can't be in two places at once Dale." Tav bit back.
"Yeah, well, that may be so but we've all agreed no women in combat units," Dale replied less aggressively. "We ain't in Manticore now, either." In my mind that makes an alpha council decision as important as a military one.
"In my mind it does too," Alec agreed quietly from behind Max. Tapping Tav's shoulder he gestured for his gear. Tav's eyes held Alec's for a long moment before he reluctantly resumed stripping his equipment.
."I'm happy to go, Sir," Leah burst out, surreptitiously kicking Dale in the shins. "I know I'm the best," she finished with pride, glowering narrow eyed at a now silent Dale.
Max watched in numb acceptance as Alec started putting on Tav's gear.
"She's always worked with me Sir, since we were children." Dale explained, his voice suddenly young, less sure. He's probably only just nineteen if that and already he's responsible for the welfare of thirty other transgenics Max thought sadly. She watched Alec as he strapped Tav's gear to his legs.
"I wouldn't mind so much if she was going to be with me but she won't be…" Dale trailed off, his voice even more unsure as Leah glowered angrily at him.
"Yeah, I know Dale. She stays home," Alec's voice was terse, authoritative and it brooked no argument.
Quickly masking his relief Dale glanced sideways at a crestfallen Leah,
"Leah, we're all on active alert now and we need you here with your Unit. Your females along with Max and the females in my unit will form the last perimeter of defence around command. Report to Biggs immediately." Alec ordered as he manoeuvred stiffly into Tav's Kevlar.
"Yes Sir," Leah shot back enthusiastically, obviously mollified by the importance of her new orders. Fixing Dale with a quelling stare she jerked her head for him to follow as she turned to go. Dale stared after her departing back
"The last ring of defence around Command, means inside, surrounded by everybody else doesn't it Sir?" Dale grinned.
Max's own lips quirked as Alec raised an amused eyebrow in agreement.
"Thank you, Sir." Dale saluted, and Max watching his grateful, respectful face had a glimpse of why Alec had the allegiances he needed to remain alpha. Watching Dale as he headed after Leah she suddenly realized that she like Leah, had also been assigned the all-important job of protecting Command. Her eyes narrowed on Alec and he smiled innocently at her before his gaze moved past her to Tav.
"He was right Tav this isn't Manticore. " Alec said quietly. Distracted he smiled quickly in surprised appreciation when Max pushed his hands away and started to fasten his flak jacket.
"Why would, Dale, let his mate or any of his females go into combat without him when everybody else's females are home protected, Huh?" he continued.
"Yeah, I know Alec but you aren't really fit and she's the best. It was worth a try," he shrugged.
"If you'd though before you'd acted you would have realized that Dale would never have allowed her to go, but you didn't think. In your rush to protect me you disregarded what every male in TC, yourself included, had already agreed. You put yourself into an avoidable no win confrontation with Dale and not only had your authority challenged but also risked antagonising every male on this mission." Alec's gaze raked him impatiently. "It was fucking stupid."
Tav's indifferent shrug as he shuffled from foot to foot reminded Max of Alec.
"Tonight while we're gone try not to piss anybody off or make any decisions that don't have at least a 50% chance of a successful outcome, alright."
"If you don't trust me you can always get Biggs to take Command," Tav shot back his face a mixture of chagrin and worry.
He does really care, he just pretends he doesn't Max realized as she watched the exchange. He really is a lot like Alec she thought as she watched them.
Alec's eyes pinned him. "Don't be fucking stupid. You've got command until I get back," he snapped tersely.
Tav's face was a mixture of relief and dissatisfaction as he handed Alec the last of his equipment. "You shouldn't be going like that anyway."
"Yeah, I know that but I don't have a choice. Neither you nor Steve have the munitions experience I have if this goes sideways. These missions aren't just strategically important. There're even more crucial from a morale point of view. It's the first time we've fielded all male combat units, outside the pack structure, since Manticore tried it, and you remember how successful that was? He finished derisively.
"If the guy Dale and Leah have been training goes okay tonight, well and good, but if he doesn't then I'll be there, as I'd always intended." Distracted he stilled Max's hands as she pulled tightly at front the fastenings on his flak jacket.
"I like it loose Max,"
"To bad. It will provide some extra bracing for your ribs like this. You're having it tight."
Rolling his eyes in frustrated acceptance Alec caught Tav's smug smirk and glowered at him.
Still smirking Tav sauntered across to where Steve was supervising the last of the equipment into the vans.
"Was it just a recon Alec?" Max asked.
"Yeah it appeared that way. I only took a couple of Units out, just enough to send them packing but not enough for them to gauge our numbers. They will be back but its highly unlikely it will be tonight. Hopefully they won't be back for the week it will take us to finish hitting the service installations." As he said it Alec realized how unlikely that was.
"Why have you left Tav in Command instead of Biggs?" Max asked curiously.
"Because he's the best choice despite what just happened here," Alec snorted. "He's a damn good commander when he doesn't let his hot head rule his actions and propel him into making rash decisions before he's thought things through.
"Why not send him out with the other team and leave Steve in command here?" she queried dubiously. Then if he fucks up he'll still be under your direction.
"If the army does come back when I'm away Max, Tav fights behind me and he's the best one to leave in command. Steve fights behind Tav."
He could tell by her puzzled frown that she didn't understand. How did he explain this when he barely understood it himself and what would she think when he presented her with more evidence of just how instinctive driven transgenic males were.
Max noted his defensive expression as his eyes moved momentarily off hers but when they touched hers again it was no longer there.
There was no real reason to not tell her he reasoned. She'd accepted everything up until now, even before she had said she loved him, he had no cause to doubt she wouldn't understand this.
Their eyes met, his dark and serious as they searched hers, Max smiled encouragingly. He's starting to trust me. Her throat was tight with emotion as she waited for him to explain.
"Transgenic males instinctively rank each other according to who is dominant. When we meet another transgenic male, wether we know him or not, we instantly know our ranking in relation to him. When we fight together our instincts tell us our place in the line-up. Tav's is behind me and Steve's is behind him, then Todd, then Biggs and then so on through our Unit. When we fight beside other Units the line-up reorders itself based on the dominance of the Units CO.
"So how come Steve is your second then?" she asked.
"Because Tav was a couple of years younger than us and that is how it evolved when we were children. Tav doesn't really care about his ranking and he's in no hurry to be doing Steve's job, believe me. But if something where to happen to me then the Units would defer to Tav. They would be looking to him first as alpha. If he refused it then they would be looking to Steve."
"Kat told me that when you were younger you fought amongst yourselves to establish ranking order. Why did you do that if it's instinctive?" she asked.
What else had Kat told her he wondered warily as he steadfastly held her gaze?
"I guess because when we were young we were still sorting out our instincts," he replied shrugging, thinking that would have to do. He certainly couldn't see any reason to dwell on the fact that even as adults their naturally competitive aggression combined with their instincts would still compel them to defend their ranking if they were challenged.
"It's instinctive for you to Max. You just have to start feeling and sensing your instincts again."
"Yeah," she agreed sighing. It was happening for her slowly but it was much slower than she would like. There was so much more to everything than she had ever imagined. She cringed mentally remembering how disdaining, dismissive and contemptuous she'd been of everything and how eager to help other transgenics assimilate into the human world.
How could she have been so naïve, so lacking in judgement? Why on earth would she ever want Alec to act like a human male? He understood and accepted like no one else ever had and as far as she was concerned she wouldn't want to change a thing about him. Not the important things anyway.
She cherished everything about her new life with him. She loved the way he'd touch her unconsciously when he was thinking about something or talking to someone else. His possessive, tender, protectiveness, and the way he tried to please her while he pretended he wasn't. She loved the way he made love to her and how he would kiss her for so long that the world would spinout of focus and she'd loose track of time. She loved the way he could make love to her all night and want to start again in the morning.
Time for him to go she realized her eye drawn first to Kat as she ardently kissed Steve goodbye and then to Leah busy doing the same to Dale, she sighed heavily, ruthlessly suppressing her overwhelming urge to again tell him she loved him.
"Be careful Alec," she said tremulously.
"Always," he whispered as he pulled her close.
"When I come home, –" provocatively he brushed his lips across the soft willing fullness of hers, "I expect you to be waiting for me –" gently he nuzzled her nose with his, "In our bed,-" his mouth found the sensitive tender spot just below her earlobe, "Ready and willing,-" he trailed his lips across, the delicate line of her jaw, "To take up where we left off, before."
"I will be," she breathed against his lips, before they closed over hers. He kissed her with a sweet aching passion that when he pulled away left her breathless.
"Make sure you are," he breathed huskily, gently nipping her earlobe as he let her go. She watched him stride over to Tav and Biggs as Kat came and stood quietly beside her. Max watched solemnly as they climbed into the van.
"Tav's like Alec he isn't good at staying behind," Kat contemplated, as Tav followed the departing vans to the door and stood staring out into the night after them. Max could sense his tension from across the warehouse.
"Why is he so worried, Kat? Is there something he knows that Alec hasn't told me?" she asked in alarm.
"No Max," Kat reassured.
"They always worry about each other, its normal I suppose," Kat shrugged.
Max looked at her curiously. They were all close but she remembered Tav's tension and worry at the alpha fight had been as great as her own. She also remembered something else from the alpha fight. Something Thor had said. Her head spun to Tav still standing in the warehouse dock He had his hands in his jeans pockets and was scuffing the dirt with his boot as he stared morosely into the darkness. She was again reminded of how much like Alec he was. The same height, build the same mannerisms and even the same facial expressions.
Max frowned her eye on Tav's brooding face. Something was niggling at the back of her mind. "Kat, sometimes Tav really reminds me of Alec."
"Yeah me to," Kat replied shrugging. "They don't look alike but yet they are," she agreed. "Not surprising I suppose, they are brothers."
"Yeah," Max agreed covering her shock. Why the hell hadn't Alec told her? He had another brother. Her baby would have an uncle. This was important and he hadn't told her. Dejectedly her gaze went back to Tav. She'd really thought Alec was starting to trust her and yet he hadn't even told her this.
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Impatiently Tav's eyes swung to Max as she sat back down again.
"Well you try being three months pregnant and see how many times you have to pee," she said indignantly in the face of his long suffering pained expression.
"Look since I'm so annoying I'm just going to go home and wait there. If we're maintaining radio silence then there's no point in my staying here anyway."
"Yeah, there is Max. We're on full alert, so you stay here with me and the rest of the unit until Alec gets back." Exasperated Tav ran his hand through his hair. What a handful she was. She couldn't follow orders, argued about everything, and still Alec was so besotted with her he let her lace him so tight into his body armour that he could hardly breathe. Well he was going to make sure nothing happened to her on his watch and that meant that she was stayed right here with him.
What the attraction was to being mated he'd never understand. Personally he would have been quite happy to never mate. He liked variety anyway, not that he had that option these days he thought despondently. With their uneven male to female ratio there were now no longer any single women who weren't being fought for and variety for him or any of them was a thing of the past.
Ignoring him Max headed out of Command only to find Tav's hand on her arm. "Look I can't leave here Max. If something does happen then I gotta be here."
Angrily Max pulled her arm from his grasp. "What the fuck does that have to do-"
"Lets wait for him here together, Max?" Please?" he interrupted.
Max felt her lips quirk as he smiled engagingly his expression so sweet and hopeful, and so like Alec at his most charming, that she felt like laughing. Suppressing her amusement she sighed grudgingly and flopped back down into the chair she'd been sitting in.
Tav glanced at her sideways surprised and at her easy capitulation. Maybe she wasn't entirely contrary he decided his eyes on her profile. Just tired he concluded watching her yawn, and probably as worried as he was. They had been gone for two hours now and should by now be leaving their first targets. Only four more each tonight and both teams were home safe. He hoped to god everything had gone to schedule, timing was essential if they were to hit all the facilities undetected and be back inside TC before dawn.
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"Where've got movement just outside the grid Tav," Dix called.
Catapulting from her seat Max hurried over to Tav, Dix and Biggs already clustered around the security monitors. Max could see the tiny blips that donated men on the screen.
"Only the northwest corner so far and only about thirty. They're definitely military," Tav said, watching the ordered advance of the blips on the screen towards their outer boundary.
"Alpha six five to Drago six one just let em in. Don't let them see you yet, over." Tav ordered into his earpiece.
"Why the fuck would they send thirty men back when we've just sent sixty packing?" he wondered out loud.
White, Tav guessed, and that means familiars. A much more deadly force than anything the army could throw at them. His adrenalin already pumping he headed for the pile of body armour they'd confiscated from the ordinary soldiers earlier in the night. His eyes fell on Max and Kat clustered around the monitors. Hesitantly he stopped in his tracks his glance moving past them and over the rest of the people Alec had left in his care. Frustrated his eyes swung to Biggs who already had his calm, serious gaze fixed steadily on him.
Fuck, I hate command. Scowling at Biggs as Tav pushed down his immediate and pressing instinct to go straight out there and deal to White. Inhaling deeply in frustration he ignored the adrenalin already pumping through his system and headed back towards the monitors.
"We need to get Alec back now," Max demanded.
"No," Tav answered automatically, his mind already running through his options.
If he engaged with White now it would be a noisy and bloody fight impossible to hide or disguise and it would bring the wrath of both the army and the police down on them tonight with Alec, Steve and their teams outside and exposed. Not a good plan he decided regretfully, but he wasn't letting White go either. That fucker had too much to answer for. Tav pushed the thought of Tanya and Ana from his mind.
"Yes," Max insisted.
What the hell had Alec been thinking when he'd left Tav in charge anyway he's little more than a boy. Biggs has probably had more military experience than him. Impatiently she reached past Dix and hit the keys that opened the radio channel to Alec.
Astounded at her lack of discipline Tav's hand immediately followed hers tapping the same keys to close the channel his head still running through his options.
Furious Max's eyes swung to his.
"What the fuck-" she trailed off her eyes locked with his. She could feel the hair on the back of her own neck stand to attention as his eyes glowed into hers.
Afraid and not knowing why, she stared back as she fought an overwhelming urge to back away from him. This must be what a cornered animal feels like Max thought all her instincts clamouring for her to run but unable to because he wouldn't release her eyes.
Blood pounded through her ears, bewildered, her inexplicable fear growing, Max heard Biggs's voice odd sounding and distant.
"Tav," Biggs demanded sharply into the silence, "What do you want us to do."
Acknowledging Biggs Tav's eyes finally released hers. Feeling a huge sense of relief her head still high and defiant but fighting an almost irresistible urge to just turn and run she summed as much dignity as she could and backed hastily away from both him and the computer consul.
"Nothing yet Biggs," Tav snapped, Max forgotten as his earpiece crackled into life
"Alpha six five this is Drago six one we've got scent on them now, Tav, they aren't army, there're familiars, over. "
"Yeah,"Tav acknowledged into his mouthpiece. Just like I thought.
"This is alpha six five listen up everybody. We have familiars in our zone and white has gotta be with them. That bastard isn't leaving here alive. We don't want to engage with him until we've brought Alec and the rest of our own kind home. We contain and hold them for as long as we can, over."
"Drago six one. Let them penetrate. Keep them surrounded on the northeast and don't let them know you're there, over."
"Kane six one, move your Unit up and contain on the southwest. Make sure they don't detect you. Marcus six one move your unit into the southwest of grid two and keep their entry point under surveillance. The rest of you in grids 1-9 keep covering Drago's and Kane's flanks using the alpha formation, over."
"That will seal them up until we figure out why they're here, Biggs," Tav finished his attention back on the screens.
Not just a boy Max thought her gaze back on the monitors watching the tiny blips that donated their own kind methodically surrounding the thirty familiars, as they stealthily swept deeper into transgenic territory.
Max felt Kat's comforting presence beside her.
"Kat, what Tav just did to me?" Max asked uncertainly. "My instinct was to…" she floundered not really sure what it was she wanted to say.
"Yeah, Max I know," Kat reassured her. "Tav just showed you who he was." Max frowned her lack of understanding.
"My instincts were telling me to run Kat, I don't understand?"
Kat shrugged, "it's just your instincts returning Max. You challenged Tav inappropriately, and he responded by showing you his alpha rank. I've never seen Tav do that to a female before, but then I've never seen a Commander's direct order like you did his either." Kat added dryly.
"Tav is alpha to you Max, he's alpha to everyone but Alec. Our instincts recognise that and it gives him power over us. Your instincts recognised this and you backed off, which was what he wanted."
Kat watched Max's eyes narrow and laughed. "Yeah tell me about it." she said. "None of us like it either, but it's the way of it," she shrugged. "If its any consolation, Max, I once saw Tav back Thor down like that. Thor didn't manage to hold his gaze for as long as you did and Thor's alpha ranking was pretty high."
"Alec didn't just leave Tav as Commander because he knew he'd be able to handle this sort of thing." Max followed Kat's eyes to the flurry of activity around them. "Steve could have handled this just as well," Kat said. "Alec left Tav in Command because he's the only one, besides himself, strong enough to line the units up without question behind him."
"If everything turned to shit in a military sense and we were left with males fighting in their instincts then Alec and Tav are the only alphas strong enough and with enough allegiances to control them.
"How come Dale challenged Tav about Leah then, Kat?"
"Because Tav's military rank is the same as Dale's and Tav gave Leah a military order not an alpha order. If he'd given her an alpha order our protocols dictate he would have had to deliver it via the Dale because Leah is a member of his pack. Dale would still have challenged it because it had been decided by an alpha council that there would be no females in combat. Dale would no more have agreed to send Leah than Alec would have agreed to send any of us."
"Tav was trying to keep Alec out of the mission so he could heal properly and sometimes Tav doesn't think before he acts when he's protecting his own," Kat added, as they moved back to the security screens.
"He should still call, Alec. Radio silence isn't imperative on this mission." Max insisted intending for Tav to hear.
Tav's eyes swung to hers. He hadn't meant to show her his rank and he was uncomfortable that he had. It wasn't good to impose power over women. There was no need. They dealt differently than males and he regretted what he had done, but he'd been distracted, still running things through his head and her arrogant disregard had taken him by surprise.
Looking at her with new respect he thought about how long she'd managed to hold his gaze. No wonder Alec was so besotted he thought grinning appreciatively. He could probably count on one hand the number of males that outranked her. When she meet his grin with a solemn face her eyes wary and guarded already remorseful he met her glance.
"You're right Max, radio silence may have been more precautionary than necessary initially. However now we have hostiles in our territory its mandatory. I don't want anyone tracking Alec and the other team to their locations by using the radio signal. They're exposed out there and too far away for us to get to them in a hurry," he explained.
"Call them back then," she demanded.
"That mission is priority one. White and a few familiars are of little consequence. We'll keep them contained until Alec is home and then we'll eliminate them.
"Of little consequence." Max repeated incredulously. "He's been killing us for over a year and you think he is of no consequence?"
"No. The fact that he's been killing transgenics is of considerable consequence, and if it is White out there then he'll pay for that, here tonight. I meant that White and thirty familiars pose little threat to us, and they're of low priority in that respect," Tav explained patiently.
"Alec won't think that."
"Yeah, he will," Tav disagreed confidently. "White has only survived this long because we've only ever mounted a pissant half hearted rear guard defence. We aren't doing that anymore and tonight White is the walking dead." His eyes detached and unemotional he turned his attention back to the screens.
The walking dead Max repeated silently her eyes morbidly following Tav's back the blips on the security screens.
TBC
Thankyou to all of your who have reviewed me and offered your encouragement its much appreciated. Jonty and I are collaborating on some characters so if you want to read the story if Alec's unit when they are young then you should read Everything Made Sense by Jonty, a very good story