Hey people I know it's been a wait but I have been writing just not this chapter. Sorry about the wait.
Chapter Thirty-Seven
There were babies down there from alpha pack males. That must be why Tanner had sounded so unlike himself when he'd asked for them. When he asked for me. When she'd heard his voice break like that Tanya had known he was asking for her. Whatever had happened down there had disturbed him. She'd never know him emotional in battle. Ever. No matter what was happening when he was soldiering he was as so calm he functioned like he was automated.
"Alec will you check that the baby carrying my scent is still okay."
When Tav's agitated voice broke in Tanya's ear her eyes went immediately to Kat's. Fuck no not Tav.
She could tell by the pain in Kat's eyes where her thoughts had gone. Not Steve too. Or Alec she thought her eyes going to Max's grey face before dropping to Max's hand that Kat was holding so tight it was going white. She remembered that grip from when Kat had finally regained consciousness after her baby had died.
She leaned forward and silently disengaged their hands, neither seemed to really notice.
"Tanne here, Where the Fuck is my support unit Biggs, over."
It was hard, loud, and demanding and it came over the top of, and with complete disregard for all the other radio traffic. Tanya knew immediately something was dreadfully wrong. Biggs had already told him their ETA. He knew.
She could tell by the look of compassion in Kat's eyes when they met hers what she was thinking.
Her feelings numb she leaned her head back against the skin of the bird and closed her eyes.
Tanner had a child that wasn't hers. No. It's not possible. Unthinkable. He's my mate. Mine.
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As Kat's eyes played over Tanya's stricken face her mind took her back to another time when she'd worn that same expression. Tanya had been only fifteen at the time and she'd been sitting beside her bunk holding her hand while Alec had confirmed that yes, her baby had died. And had then gone on to tell her that in the aftermath Steve and Tav had also been injured so badly that both of them could be dead as well.
If it hadn't been for Tanya she probably would have given up then and just let herself die. It had only been Tanya's determination that she live combined with her insistence that Steve still needed her that had kept Kat going. Tanya had been there for her then and now Tanya needed her to be there for her. So did Max and so would all the females who's mates were going to have children down there at that facility.
So would Tav. He would need her to. What if this female who had his baby already had a mate? How the hell would possessive, alpha Tav deal with another male rasing his child? About as well as Steve or Alec or Todd, which was not at all, their instincts just wouldn't allow it. That was why the DNA of both sexes ensured that they become emotionally attached if they mated in heat. It was nature's protection for both male and female. Without the interference of fucking Manticore she couldn't see there ever being a situation where a child was conceived and its parents didn't mate.
She already knew her own life had changed forever. She knew there was a child. She could feel it. Deep down inside her instincts she could already feel Steve's turmoil. Not his grief. Thankfully not that, she never wanted to feel his sorrow for another child again.
She knew it must be a baby he'd found because down in her primal instincts where her own child still lived, where she'd always felt his existence she no longer had that sense of emptiness and despair always there in the past when she'd allowed herself to really feel his presence.
For some reason she now had a feeling of hope. It was only a small feeling and it was also mixed with fear but it was better than the empty loneliness that used to fill her heart whenever she'd let her instincts touch her child. Perhaps her baby had found some peace now Steve had found this other child.
Swallowing the giant fear that she could feel lodged like a lump in her chest she pushed her anxiety down. She wouldn't be so afraid if Steve and her hadn't grown so far apart over these last few months, but they had, and a child by another female was hardly going to bring them closer. Steve would want to protect not only his child but the mother as well. That was Steve. He was one of the most possessively, protective males in their pack. He was always there if you needed him and he would be for whoever was the mother of this child he had found.
She'd caused so much pain when she'd killed her baby. Not just for Steve but For all her pack who she knew would rather have died running than have had her do what she did.
Now she was being offered a chance to make some amends to Steve for the pain she'd caused him.
Any child of Steve's was a gift. It didn't matter who its mother was it would still be Steve's and no matter what she was feeling herself she was going to help him this time, not hurt him. As long as he found no grief at that Facility then she'd deal with whatever was there.
Max had started to sob beside her. One of the many good things about pregnancy, the hormones bought all your emotion quickly to the surface it was impossible to bottle anything up.
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Max didn't really know why she was crying. She hadn't meant to she wasn't really sad. There was nothing to be sad about. At first she'd thought there was. When Ana's disembodied voice had calmly announced that there were other alpha pack babies beside hers at that Facility. Just the thought of anybody else having as large a piece of Alec's as his child had sent a shaft of pain through her so sharp that for a moment she'd had difficulty breathing.
That little voice in her head that had been telling her all these months that the life she'd found with him was too good to be true had boomed loudly filling her with its messages of doom, fear and panic about how nothing as wonderful as they had together could possibly last.
Then her baby sensing her tension had kicked her and she'd come to her senses. Alec loved her and he loved their son. No matter how many stupid little voices she heard in her head that wouldn't change. Whatever he found down there he would have her full support. The only person who could change his love for her was herself and she wasn't going to be doing that.
She knew no one would ever come between him and his son and if he had another child down there then it would be the same. He would let nothing prevent him from doing the right thing by that child either. That was why she loved him.
If another female down there also had his baby then she would deal with it. Alec would still be hers. If she had to share him with another child beside her own then she would. Just like she already shared him with Tav and the rest of his pack. If anything the fact that he had so many other people whom he loved and who loved him made him the transgenic she loved.
If there was child of his down there she only hoped it wasn't one of the baby's they had bought Cass and her team with them to help.
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"Tanner, ETA on my support unit Biggs, over."
"ETA twenty minutes Tanner,"
Alpha one, ETA 5 Tanner, over."
Copy that Alec, over."
When he asked for her for the second time in fifteen minutes Tanya knew something was more than wrong. So did Alec she could hear it in his voice when he gave Tanner his ETA again even though Tanner knew that as well.
She felt Kat sit down on one side of her and Max on the other. When Kat twinned her fingers with hers she clung on.
She knew he couldn't be wounded. She'd seen him close to death and still functioning and unflappable while in the field. So he wasn't injured she knew that and nor where any of his Unit. The only serious casualties had been in Tyler's Unit when his bird had been hit.
She'd been sitting there praying he hadn't found a child that was his down there. Now she was just praying for Tanner. The only time she could ever remember him unfocused and strung out like this was when Mario died. Mario who he'd protected like a father protects a child. In the relentless grind and cruelty of life in Manticore even strong alpha's like Tanner lost their pack members. None of those deaths had brought Tanner to his knees like Mario's had.
ETA on my Support unit Biggs, over."
ETA 5 Tanner, hang in their buddy, over."
When his voice came again the tears started to stream down her face. She no longer cared what the hell he'd found down there she just needed to get to him. She knew Alec had already relieved him of duty because Tav's was the voice she could now hear controlling the push through the Facility. Something he wouldn't be doing if Tanner were okay.
She felt Kat's squeeze her fingers and Tanya met her calm steady gaze. Kat hadn't been their alpha for most of her life for nothing. In a crisis, when you needed her, despite what was going on for her she was always there with what was needed. She had the true alpha's ability to ground you in her calmness and her strength and that always helped you find your own.
Calm and strong was the transgenic motto when they went into battle. That was what would get them through whatever awaited them at the Facility. That was what would get her and Tanner through whatever was happening for him down there.
" Dex, I have a male baby, approximately three months old, bleeding from his arm- "
"Bring it to the med unit, Reub, over." Dex interrupted impatiently.
He's trapped, we haven't manage to get him out yet. He's mine Dex. You get your ass down here now. We're in the collapsed section building 2, South West corner, over."
Max had it as well. Tanya watched as Max got up and made her cumbersome way across to a pale now sobbing Karen. That same ability as Kat had, to put your own shit aside and be there when other people needed you. Tav and now Reub. Steve to maybe. They hadn't heard his voice on the air since the alpha unit had landed. How many more?
We also have five severely injured females all still trapped, over."
Roger that Reub, be there as soon as Tav can get me through, over."
Tav we need cutting equipment down in the cells of building two, over."
Copy that Reub over,"
Drago one, we're on it Tav. ETA 5 Reub, over."
Dale tell Mezo we've found your kid and it mother, over,"
Copy that Reub he's on his way, over."
"Come yourself to Dale, over.""
"What? Fuck… Yeah I'm on my way Reub,"
Dale too. Poor Leah.
"Reub I need Steve. Is he clear yet.?"
"Negative on that Tav. No progress, over."
"Copy that over."
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The bird had barely touched the ground before Tanya was out the door and moving across the tarmac toward Tanner. He was standing with his back to them staring so intently at the body bags in front of his bird that he didn't even appear to have noticed they had landed.
Stopping beside Max Kat's gaze followed hers. "The bodies must be females whose babies were connected to his unit." Max's troubled eyes flicked along with Kat's to the four body bags in front of their bird. They watched in silence as Tanner turned to Tanya when she tentatively touched his shoulder from behind.
Tanners expression reminded her of Steve's anguished face when she'd killed their baby. Choking down the lump of pain in her throat for Tanner and his child, she knew must be dead she groped for Max's hand.
"Steve's found a baby of his. I can feel it. I just want it to be safe. That's all."
Max met her eyes in understanding her thoughts echoing Kat's as her gaze went back to Tanner now wrapped around Tanya his face buried in her neck while she stroked his hair like she was consoling a child. If Alec's got one here let it be safe as well.
Instinctively she turned just as Alec came out of the building she knew to be the hospital. Despite what she'd decided in her head she still felt her heart hitch when she saw the small bundle he had perched on his shoulder.
His wide welcoming smile just seemed so incongruous. Her world had just been knocked off its axis and here he was grinning like an idiot. He moved the baby off his shoulder, and held it out for Max to see.
She gazed in bewilderment at the sleeping child. All her senses seemed to have stopped working she couldn't even scent if it was a girl or a boy.
"She doesn't have a name yet. But I guess it won't take Tav long to sort that one out."
What the hell has it to do with Tav? Numbly Max stared at Alec's grinning face. Why was he grinning? He must know how she was feeling.
Kat moved closer to gaze enviously at the baby. Tav mightn't be thrilled about his sudden fatherhood but he'd come around and realize just how lucky he was. How could he not she was just perfect. "She's gorgeous Alec," she cooed taking the baby from Alec who was now smiling uncertainly at Max.
"She even looks like Tav," Kat laughed, titling her so Max could see the little face partially covered by the blanket she was wrapped in.
"Yeah, she does look more like Tav than Alec," Max said gazing at the baby.
"Babies are often dark when they're born though, so it doesn't really mean anything" she assured Alec. Not even knowing why she was bothering to worry about his feelings when he didn't seem to give a stuff about hers.
"Are you okay Max," Alec enquired his solicitous arm going around her shoulders.
"Yes, I'm fine," she snapped sharply, shrugging him off. Insensitive clod.
She even smells like Tav Max thought when her senses started functioning again. She could smell Alec on the baby but Tav's scent was stronger.
Sheepishly she put her hand in Alec's. It was Tav's baby not Alec's.
Now thoroughly used to her erratic moods Alec flashed her a quick grin.
Max returned his grin her wide beatific smile reflecting her relief. He hasn't found one here.
Her anxiety allayed and now thoroughly intrigued Max moved closer to Kat so she could have a proper look at the baby. Her attention still on the child Max didn't sense the female heading towards them until she was half way across the compound. Then a sixth sense, accompanied by a frisson of tense, alert wariness turned her in her direction.
When the female stopped beside Alec all Max's senses were on hyper alert and she had this weird feeling she couldn't really explain. She knew from her scent that this female was the mother of Tav's baby. When she felt Kat moving beside her. Without even taking her eyes of the female Max's instincts immediately knew what Kat was doing when she turned side on. She's more alpha than Kat and Kat has just signalled her acceptance of that. Max held her ground but she could feel a cold finger of tense wariness run along her spine.
Julia stopped shyly beside Alec and Baby. These females were from Ana's pack she'd heard so much about how brave and smart they were that she was really nervous about meeting them. What if they thought she was ignorant like the guards?
Max gazed at Julia curiously. Alec had said she would know if she ever met a female who was alpha to her. This female couldn't be more alpha than her or she would know. Just as she'd known when Tav had shown her his rank. But this weird alert wariness she was feeling must mean something. I think we must have the same alpha ranking.
The very pregnant female in front of her hadn't acknowledged her as alpha. That had never happened to Julia before she'd never met a female she wasn't alpha to until now. Like they always did Julia's instincts told her what to do. Inclining her body slightly but still facing Max she acknowledged her with respect.
Max instinctively acknowledged Julia in the same manner. Just like Alec had said now that she'd started to use them her instincts were definitely reawakening. She felt a deep sense of satisfaction at the same time aware that less than a year ago she'd would have been grossly uncomfortable just thinking about her instincts let along acting on them.
She glanced at Alec whose face was now a picture of shock and surprise. He hadn't found a baby of his here and her instincts were working just like they were supposed to be. That was all she cared about she couldn't care less if this female had the same alpha status as her?
She smiled her welcome. "Hey I'm Max and this is Kat my second. What immediate help do you need for your females?" she asked her attention on Cass and her team now following one of their medics towards the hospital.
"I'm Julia. My second has been injured. A lot of my females are still missing and I need to go and find them." With Susie still unconscious and Ana already occupied liasing between their injured females and the Manticore medics she'd been reluctant to leave her other females. She needed someone to help Ana while she went looking in the places she knew her females would be.
"We'll look after what's happening in there," Max said gesturing to the hospital building. When you find your females just send them back to us."
Julia met her steady gaze. Her already knew she was a strong alpha and her instincts recognized she could be trusted. Her second too she decided after subjecting Kat to the same intense scrutiny. "Thankyou." Her eyes dropped to Baby still being held by Kat.
"You can leave her with us it will be safer than taking her with you."
Undecided Julia hesitated.
"We're all Tav's pack. She'll be safe with us." Kat assured her.
Julia's eyes moved past her to the other females standing behind Kat. They had baby's genetic contributors scent on them therefore they had babies. She decided to trust them with Baby. It's only for a short time and my own females will be there anyway.
Five hours later Julia wearily followed Alec and the last of her rescued females towards the hospital. Ana had certainly been right when she'd said transgenic males were not like ordinary males. These males like her females knew how to protect their own kind. They had been absolutely effective protecting her females and their babies from the soldiers they'd encountered as they'd searched the facility.
Every male who'd found a baby carrying his scent had tried to help. They hadn't been much use when it came to actually looking after babies, but it had been extremely comforting just having them there to fight the guards and keep the babies safe. Transgenic males were definitely much better soldiers than ordinaries she thought with satisfaction.
She'd seen incidences of kindness today that she'd never expected to see from males. They had all been as concerned as she was to protect her females and their babies especially the males with babies carrying their scents. Today these males strong territorial instinct had definitely worked to her female's advantage. She could only hope there obvious and immediate attachment to the babies carrying their scents wouldn't prove to be a problem for her females.
She didn't think it would be. In her experience if you just listened to what your instincts told you then things between transgenics usually sorted themselves out. It was only when ordinaries interfered that things got fucked up. After spending the last five hours with Alec while they looked for her females she had even more confidence in him. His instincts were strong and like her he listened to them. If all his males were the same then their instincts would sort everything out just like they did for her females.
Maybe Baby's genetic contributor wasn't really a bastard and he would be like Alec once she got to know him. Alec had told her he was Baby's Uncle so maybe his brother would turn out to be okay as well. She already knew he was very alpha and the more alpha a transgen was the stronger there instincts, so maybe Tav would turn out to be kind like Alec.
Even though she hadn't seen him she'd know from listening to Alec on his radio that it was Tav and his soldiers who'd been digging her trapped females out of the burnt out ruins of the Disciplinary Block. She'd have to think of a way to repay him for that. To repay all these males she thought as she walked with Alec back to the hospital.
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The arid stink of smoke was so strong in her nose that Kat couldn't smell anything else. Having her strongest most reliable sense disabled was disorientating enough without the thick smoke that clogging the air making it difficult to see and breathe as well. It was no wonder Reagan had been reluctant to let her through.
She may not be able to smell or see them but she knew that except for Alec all the males from her pack were in here now, even Tav appeared to have temporarily handed his command over to Reagan.
The good thing was that if her senses weren't working in here then neither were theirs. While she had been quite happy to take Reagan on when he'd tried to keep her out, she certainly wasn't going to be brawling with the males in her own pack.
She could hear the metallic clang of metal hitting metal and knew they must still be banging in the supports she'd been crawling past.
"We should have it shored up enough in about five minutes. This is the last support. Then we'll be ready to go."
She started to crawl towards the voice she recognised as Tav's. Wherever he was Steve wouldn't be far away. At least down on her belly like this the smoke wasn't so thick and she could see a little in front of her enabling her to see the two large boots now directly in her field of vision. She couldn't tell who it was because he was only visible from the waist down the rest of his body was through a small gap in the wall."
"Go back now." he ordered curtly when she touched his leg. "It's to dangerous in here. We don't need any help?"
She recognised Mark's voice. He obviously didn't know who she was because like hers his nose would be numb from the smoke and unable to pick up scent Ignoring him she continued to move along his body so she could squeeze her upper torso through the gap along side his. She knew when he realized she was female and not just one of the guys from the fire crews come to help.
"What the fuck…"
When he moved sideways the gap beside him got bigger and Kat pushed her shoulders through.
"Kat. You shouldn't be here. Go back. We'll be out in about five minutes," he said grabbing the back of her flak jacket as she crawled past him.
"Please Kat go back. There's fuck all room to work once you get further up. If the shoring doesn't hold and the roof goes then we'll need the strongest backs we've got to hold it up. That isn't you you'll just be taking up space and using oxygen."
"There are two floors on top of this one Mark. If the roof caves then you're all dead. It won't matter whose back is stronger. I'm going forward," she said wrenching out of his grasp, knowing he wouldn't leave his position.
Pulling her body through the next narrow gap she found herself in a larger area and now face to face with Tav. The roof of the area they were in had dropped until there was just over a metre of space between it and the floor. Just enough for the males in her pack to be squatting like Tav was with their shoulders braced against the roof.
She glanced in horror at the scattering of metal supports they had managed to erect and then at the pile they still had to go. They weren't ready for anything. Fuck Mark hadn't been kidding. They were going to use their backs.
"Are you insane Tav? There are two fucking floors on top of this one?"
Tav quickly dismissing the immediate flare of anxiety her appearance produced reassessed this new development as he motioned her forward. She was small and they could maybe use that.
"We don't have time to finish shoring it up. Reagan's just told me that the noise we heard a couple of minutes ago was the supports in the West corner collapsing. Steve is in the back there behind all that." He gestured toward a wall of rubble screening the corner from her view.
"There's a child trapped in a cell at the back. Steve won't leave without it and we aren't leaving without Steve." The look in Tav's eyes confirmed what she already knew in her heart. Steve had found a baby with his scent. Although how anyone could scent anything down here down here is beyond me.
The groaning sound she'd been intermittently hearing since she'd crawled in here came again. Much louder and this time and accompanied by the rending sound of tearing metal. Tav stopped talking his eyes following his hands now instinctively back bracing the roof as if he really could physically hold it up. Kat's eyes quickly followed his around the room as he checked to see that the supports were all still holding.
Her heart in her mouth she watched as Reub and Nathan quickly kicked the one that had listed to the side as upright as they could, given the weight now pressing down on it. Her eyes went back to Tav's.
"We've got as many supports in as we've had time for. They won't hold off the inevitable for much longer. We were only waiting for Reub to anchor that last one. Now we're going to break that down in the hope that we can get into the cell the kids in. He gestured at the wall their males were lining up along, the remaining metal supports now held like battering rams. He shrugged and Kat immediately knew he wasn't very hopeful.
"If we can make a gap big enough and get into the cell we can maybe pull him through," he added. "You'll be better off down the back with Steve until we need you."
"And Kat," he added as she turned to head for Steve. "Once we push this wall down we'll have a fucking short time to get fifteen bodies along the tunnel we're hoping the supports and our backs are going to hold open for us. Steve's at the back and he'll be the last out. Because you can't hold anything up you'll have to be the first Kat. None of the guys will go until you're on your way."
Kat met his eyes in understanding. If it all turned to custard she either left Steve to it or they'd all die down here.
They had already started to slam the supports into the crumbling wall as she ran as fast as her crouched position allowed toward the back. The first thing she saw when she climbed over the pile of rubble and steel was Steve lying on his stomach his arm extended over a gap in the floor. He was covered in dirt, and soot and there was a long gash in his bicep that was oozing blood. Why the hell has he taken his protective gear off was her first thought when she saw the deep bloody gash on his arm?
Then she saw the skinny little arm and the small hand resting in his open palm its fingers clasped around his thumb. It's not a baby. It's a child. A very frightened child she realized as the noise from the roof above them as it started to crumble filled her ears and the little arm jerk backwards. He's trying to calm it down by giving it his scent. That's why he's taken his protective gear off she realized as Steve's fingers closed around the little hand just before it disappeared back inside the narrow gap Steve also had his face pressed against. It's not working though. Deep in her instincts where she'd always felt her own baby she could also feel this child's confusion and fear.
"Its all right. I'm not going to hurt you. My scent is your scent. Smell your arm again like you did before. That's right. That's good, don't struggle. I'll have you out of there soon. I promise. It's all right," he soothed, but Kat could hear the strain underlying the calm he was trying to project for the child.
"It hasn't worked Steve we're through the wall but we still can't see it." Tav yelled.
"The gap between the floor and the wall is bigger. See if you can bring some pressure to bear on the floor in there. It might force it to open wider and give me enough clearance to pull it clear."
He was too focused on the child to know she was there and his sense of smell would be as useless as hers was down here. Kat looked at the six-inch gap in the wall her heart constricting. He was never going to be able to pull a child through there.
"We can't get him out Tav. Get out now. All of you," she yelled her eyes locking with Steve's when his head whipped around to her.
"What the fuck…"
"He lied to you Steve. They only had time to get the roof partially shored up. If they leave now they might make it out of here alive. If it starts to cave they're fucked."
"Get out now Tav. That's an order," Steve roared his eyes locked with hers.
Kat shook her head in rejection of his unspoken appeal for her to leave with them. She crawled under the arm he lifted for her and buried her face against his neck. She wasn't going anywhere. Things may have been stained between them for the last few months, but she still knew without a doubt that there would no point to her life if Steve, who she loved more than anyone else was no longer there to share it with her.
"Get out you pricks," he roared again, as they started to slam the metal pylons against the floor. His hand curved protectively over her head when the everything began to shake.
Kat's eyes flew to the gap as it yawned open just enough... blurring as fast as she'd ever moved she thrust herself out from under Steve's arm and through the opening. She was moving so fast the only impression she had of the child was a shape as she jerked the little arm free from whatever it was clinging to. Her arms were around its waist as Steve whipped them both back through the fissure just before the wall dropped back down and all hell broke loose.
With the aid of Steve's hand on the back of her flack jacket she was on her feet and moving at a crouch towards the shored up passage she hoped was going to be there when they'd scrabbled their was across the pile of rubble in front of them. She had a vague awareness of the child clinging like a monkey. Its legs were wrapped around her waist and its arms around her neck as she ran at a crouch past the males now sharing the task of holding up the collapsing roof with the metal supports. She could hear the jarring noise of tearing metal and the crashing sound of falling concrete as everything disintegrated behind her.
Steve couldn't see them now. All he could see was Reuben in front of him as he brought up the rear of the line of males doing there best to hold up the roof as they alternated their positions working their way towards the narrow gap they had to get their asses through before this floor became one with the two above it.
Kat dropped and rolled onto her back when she got to the gap Marks upper torso had just disappeared through. Hands under her armpits Mark hauled her through. As she rolled quickly to her feet the child still clinging around her neck she heard the scrape of another body being dragged through the gap. Still crouched over because of the lack of head room she ran towards where she thought the door was.
All her senses were useless she couldn't see, she couldn't smell and the noise was so loud she couldn't hear anything. If I can stand upright I've got to be headed in the right direction. Her arms around the child now and running full pelt she slammed into a hard body. Alec she realized her face close enough to now see him. Her hand running along his arm then along Reagan's and then the chain of other arms forming a guide she ran towards the entrance.
Hugging the child still clinging to her, her eyes glued to the blown out doorway she counted every precious face as her pack ran clear. When Alec exited the building closely followed by Mark and Steve her heart was beating so hard she could feel its vibration under her hand still clutching the child's back. At the same time Steve's arms went around her enfolding the child between their bodies she realized it wasn't her hammering heart she could feel. It was the child's. It was terrified.
Youthere still couldn't smell anything and he was frightened, more frightened than he'd ever been before. Even scareder than when Matt yelled at him and hurt him. Even scareder than he got when they didn't bring him food for a long, long, long, long time until it was so long he thought they were never coming again.
The nice voice and the familiar, reassuring smell that had made him feel warm and good and not scared had gone. When this other guard had stolen him away from it the feeling in his stomach had been as bad as when Matt had taken that stupidfuckingteddy away because he'd been a viciouslittleanimal. He needed to get back to his cage. Not just in case Matt bought that stupidfuckingteddy back but also because his own scent was still back there and he wanted to be with it.
That thing under his skin that went thump, thump when he was really scared was loud now. When he felt someone behind him that his broken smell hadn't told him was there, he thought it was Matt. Instinctively he fought to free himself.
Kat felt the little body arch in her arms as the child tried to break free. She held on. When it relaxed its rigid body its teeth were bared and heading for her shoulder. Steve's hand enveloped its face from behind. Kat's gaze locked with the vivid blue eyes, wide and terrified as they stared at her from above Steve's hand. Steve's eyes. She didn't need its scent she could already see Steve in its little face.
"I'm not going to hurt you. Remember we have the same scent," he said soothingly burying his face in the child's neck as he breathed its scent modelling what he wanted it to do. Kat watched the child obediently inhale into his hand. Her gaze went quickly back to Steve when she heard his startled intake of breathe.
Steve's head came up his eyes wide with surprise. "Smell him Kat," he ordered.
She bent obediently having to nuzzle the little neck before her abused nose could actually get any smell. Steve's scent was her first awareness. Then the fact it was a male child and not a female like the long matted hair had suggested. Her only other awareness was her own scent. It took her a moment to realize what that meant. Her own gasp of surprise echoed Steve's. This child was a combination of her scent and Steve's. This was her child. Their child? What the hell? None of the other babies here had surrogate mothers. Why had this child?
When the hand came around his nose Youthere could smell his own familiar scent again as well as that nice good smell. He started to not feel scared again and that funny nice feeling came back in his stomach. Pushing the guard away who'd stolen him he turned to see what his scent looked like. For a moment its bigness made him scared again. Its even bigger than Matt.
When he pushed away from Kat Steve grabbed hold of him only to find himself staring into a pair of wide inquisitive blue eyes he knew were probably a lot like his own.
"Hey." When the eyes widened in wonder when he spoke his grin deepened. Steve met their wide unblinking, scrutiny with the same intense concentration.
Youthere had that good feeling back again. Even though big guards were always bad, this one still made him feel good in his stomach.
"I'm Steve. I'm your father." He didn't really know how much a child as small as this understood but he felt the need to say something.
"You belong to me," he added when the child continued to gaze solemnly at him.
When he felt Kat put her arms around his waist he put the arm he wasn't holding the child with around her shoulders and pulled her against his chest. The child broke the eye lock he had with Steve transferring the same intense scrutiny to Kat.
Kat had already pinched herself twice just to make sure she wasn't dreaming. Things as good as this just didn't happen. She finally had her longed for baby except it wasn't a baby it was a toddler. She couldn't seem to get her head around it. She had so many confusing thoughts and emotions. It was almost as if she was being given a second chance to protect the baby she'd failed.
"He's the same age as our baby would have been," she said eagerly inspecting the child again.
"Is he?" Steve asked in surprise. He didn't seem very big for three years. Steve frowned for the first time seeing the long matted hair for what it was as he became aware of how bony and slight the skinny little body he was holding was. Fucking neglect.
"The bastards haven't even looked after him physically."
Kat who'd already realized this reached up to push the tangled hair off the child's forehead. Who locks a boy as young as this in a cell on his own.
"Animals," she hissed feeling the slow building anger she'd been feeling explode into rage when the child blocked her hand with his skinny little arm ducking his head out of the way as if she was going to hit him.
Animal. Youthere knew straight away it was talking about him. He blocked its hand watching its face so he would know when it was going to try and hurt him again.
"I want to debrief all guards from this building." Her hard eyes met Alec's as he stopped beside them.
"Yeah, okay Kat. Anderson, Danny and Howl have already made a start sifting through the records we've managed to salvage. We'll be looking them over tomorrow and debriefing of the facilities personnel will probably start the next day.
Alec's eyes went to the child now gazing fixedly at him from its secure perch its hand balled and twisted around a fistful of Steve's shirt. He caught his scent as his nose started to recover from the numbing effects of the smoke. He's Kat's child as well. His puzzled relief for Kat sent his frowning gaze to where she was avidly devouring the child with her eyes. Why is he so much older than the other babies?
"Max and me are bedding down in the admin building. There's a suite there they use for visitors. It's got two rooms. You and Kat can have the other room. He'll probably be better there until he gets used to having everyone around him."
"Yeah, Steve," agreed his attention on their males jogging away. "Where are they going?"
"To brief the reinforcements I've got coming from TC. Once they arrive all the units already here can bed down for the night."
They watched Tav, Todd and Reuben as they speedily detached themselves from the group and headed for the hospital building. Mezo and Drago and a crowd of other males sprinted after them.
"Alpha one, the facility is secure now so all the guys that have found babies here are relieved of duty as from now, over" he ordered belatedly.
Steve was gazing in amusement at Kat who wasstill leaning obliviously against him her rapt face riveted on the child now gazing in fascination at Alec. Their identical absorbed expressions making him smile.
Youthere's broken nose had started to work again. All these bigger guards smelt like him. Their smell wasn't exactly the same as his and Steve the fathers, but it was nearly. They also had that other nice smell that made him feel good, and not afraid.
All except for the one that had tried to hurt him. He knew its scent to. It was like his but it also had another smell. He hadn't smelt it before and he didn't like it. Leaning forward he bared his teeth to bite it. Only to find Steve the father's hand was between his teeth instead of its shoulder.
You there jerked back his body rigid with surprise and fright. He hadn't meant to hurt his own scent. He just wanted the one who didn't smell right to go away. Now Steve the father would hurt him because he was a viciouslittleanimal.
Kat's shocked eyes went from Steve's bleeding hand still covering her shoulder to the child's face now frozen with fright. He doesn't like me. Her eyes on the child not knowing what to do she rubbed her cheek against Steve's injured hand.
Steve felt a flash of tenderness when her vulnerable uncertain eyes met his. "He's frightened Kat. It's not about you. He's just needs time that's all."
"Yeah, just time," she repeated quietly biting her now quivering lip to keep it still.
Steve the father was holding him to tightly for him to get away. Youthere stared defiantly while he waited to be hurt. The really good feeling he'd had curling in his stomach was gone now.
"We don't hurt each other here? You don't try and bite Kat again. It makes her feel really bad. Look," his eyes on the child's Steve jerked his head in Kat's direction.
You there's eyes darted to Kat like Matt. Matt is bad.
Steve watched his little face frown in concentration as he studied Kat.
Its eyes were watering like his had when Matt had pulled that sillyfuckingteddy's arms off because he had been a viciouslittleanimal.
Grabbing his own hair Youthere started to pull it banging himself in the face with his other hand like all viciouslittleanimals deserved.
When Kat grabbed his hands to restrain him his startled eyes went straight to hers. Carefully unwrapping the fingers he had tangled in his hair she held his other hand still and did what she'd wanted to do before. Ignoring his instinctive cringe she brushed the tangle of hair clear of his forehead.
"I'm Kat and I'm you're mother. You stay with Steve and me now. We won't let anyone hurt you again. You don't hurt yourself either. That's just plain silly." Kat didn't really know how much a three year old understood because she couldn't remember back that far but even if he didn't understand it made her feel better. Watching him try to punish himself had been soul wrenching.
When Youthere opened his eyes her hand was gone from his head and he wasn't hurt.
Steve watched the child's face now alight with uncertainty as his small hand went to the same place on his forehead that Kat had touched. Reflectively his arms tightened around the little body the fierce protective rush of emotion he felt taking him by surprise.The child's eyes went straight to his.
We don't hurt each other. He hadn't been hurt so Steve the father must think he was a we. Did that mean he was no longer a viciousfuckinganimal? That new funny feeling in his stomach was starting to feel even better. I want to be a we.
Kat looked at the dirty skinny little legs protruding from the oversized adults tee shirt that appeared to be the child's only garment. All she wanted to do was take him somewhere safe and quiet so she could feed him and clean him up. The gash on Steve's arm was also oozing blood at an alarming rate and she wanted to fix that as well.
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Still awake Julia watched Baby's genetic contributor and the rest of his unit as they filed quietly into the room. They were all carrying their boots and soldiers' equipment instead of wearing it and judging by the look of their wet hair they'd just showered.
Tav quickly located Julia where she lay next to Ana in their Units designated sleeping area. It's a good sign she's in our area. Maybe it means she's accepting that the baby belongs to me as well as her. Except for his guns he dropped his kit next to Todd's adding it to the pile of stuff already marking their sleeping territory. Along with the rest of the alpha unit males he stepped over the now solid wall of objects into their territory.
"Hey." Settling down beside her Tav tried to do the impossible and keep his distance while trying to lean closer and get a better look at the baby.
When his worried eyes finally moved off the baby and onto Julia she was staring at him in wide-eyed alarm.
I definitely don't like him this close.
"Has she woken up yet?" he asked his anxious eyes on the IV bag full of liquid propped above their heads. Alec had already told him that all the babies who hadn't woken and been able to feed normally had them. It was nothing to worry about. Just a precaution to stop them dehydrating. She wasn't the only baby getting her fluids like this, he knew that, but somehow that wasn't very comforting.
"Where did they put the needle?" he asked unable to prevent his automatic wince at the thought of it in her little arm.
Julia's' eyes roamed his face surprised that he'd voiced the very same thing she'd been worrying about.
"Here," she said softly, moving Baby gently until he could see her little arm with her sleeve now cut away and the drip taped to her skin.
"That might hurt her when she wakes up,"
"Yeah," Julia agreed her eyes meeting his grateful that he hadn't tried to pretend it wouldn't hurt Baby like the ordinary nurse had.
"A lot of the babies have already woken up," she blurted worriedly. Her large frightened eyes going to his. It didn't matter if he knew how worried she was. He wasn't one of her females needing her to be strong. She didn't have to pretend around him.
"She will," Tav said with conviction. Its just a matter of time," he assured her moving closer so he could peer at the baby's face. "All we have to do is keep her warm and close to us and keep stimulating her to breathe by touching her," he said repeating what Cass had told him and Todd when they'd asked her what they could be doing to help the babies to wake up. "You're doing all the right things," he added, also remembering what Cass had said about how important it was to reassure and support the mothers as well as the babies.
Julia's uncertain eyes moved from his hand now absentmindedly pulling the blanket back up that had slipped off her shoulder and back to his face.
"Ana says I am good mother," she said smiling shyly and feeling really please that he though she was smart enough to be doing the right thing.
Tav flashed her a quick uncomfortable grin. She's really is an odd one. "She'll wake up when she's ready," he repeated needing to reassure himself as well as her. "We just have to wait it out and try not to worry."
"Yeah," she agreed looking down at Baby and already starting to feel better, not as scared. Although it felt really odd to have someone else worried about Baby for some reason it was also very comforting. When he wasn't being mean to her and was just lying here beside them, his scent that was so like babies was reassuring.
"How are your shoulder and your leg?" Tav asked moving discreetly closer to the baby.
"I am fine."
Her stilted answer had him pushing down his impatience. He knew she couldn't possibly be fine. Alec had told him what he'd seen when Dex had treated her injuries. As well as her leg wound and broken collarbone she had extensive bruising and contusions all over her body. She had to be hurting everywhere.
"I'll hold her for awhile if you like so you can get some sleep?"
"No." Suddenly registering just how much close he was she moved hastily backwards taking Baby with her.
"I know you don't want me this close. And believe me I feel exactly the same. " My scent is probably strange to you but it won't be to her. It's the same as hers and it will be comforting for her to have me here," he said moving close enough so he could see what was going on.
He didn't really know if it were true but it seemed sensible that if it was comforting for him to be close to the baby then having him close might be the same for her when she woke up.
"Anyway I'm staying. She's mine too," he added in the hope of forestalling any argument.
"Your scent isn't strange to me its like babies. I just don't like you this close." Again she tried to move back only to find herself hard up against one of her sleeping females.
"I'm not trying to be close to you," he snapped. "But I need to be neat her so I can feel if she's breathing okay."
"I'm doing that. I can look after her myself," Julia hissed. So much for him thinking I'm smart.
"I know that but I still need to see for myself."
She jerked her hand quickly away when his hand brushed hers as it settled on Baby's little back.
"Go to sleep," he ordered. "You'll be absolutely no use to her when she wakes up if you've had no sleep."
"I will so. I know how to look after her. I don't need you telling me what to do." she snapped, carefully trying to find a place on Baby's back for her hand without touching his.
Her huffy petulant pout irritated the hell out of Tav.
"Yeah, well I'm still staying."
"Fuck off," she snapped moving the baby closer to her. His hand still on baby's little back moved with them.
"I don't like that smell one you either. You stink."
"I do not? I've just showered," he bit back indignantly.
He'd spent five freezing minutes standing in the bitter cold under the make shift outdoor shower hastily erected behind the bombed out accommodation block. He'd been especially careful to get all the stink of smoke off him because he didn't want to confuse the baby's nose with other smells when she finally woke up. The only smell on him now was soap and testosterone. He could hardly help that. They were still on full battle alert and until they were safely back in TC he knew the odour of testosterone wouldn't be going anywhere.
"This is the way I always smell. Go to sleep," he said closing his eyes wearily, refusing to let her annoy him any more."
"I hate your hair too." Julia said hoping that if she pissed him off enough he would go away. It was all very well trying to accommodate his instincts but what about hers? He was to close.
"What the fuck is wrong with my hair," he demanded through gritted teeth his eyes snapping open to fix on hers." She was so fucking irritating. I hate this fucking haircut. But she doesn't have to be so rude about it.
"Its all shaved and ugly. And stupid." Good he was pissed him off now maybe he'd go away.
"This is called an undercut and out in the real world where I come from it's very fashionable," he ground out.
"Humph, well its still ugly and it makes you look stupid."
"Yeah, well yours isn't so hot either," he snapped back childishly, eyeing her untidy tangle of hair.
Feeling suddenly self-consciously she resisted the urge to smooth her hair down her eyes darting away from his. She knew she was big and ugly. Groper and his bastards had told her often enough. She also remembered how bad it used to make her feel back when she actually cared what the guards thought. She didn't want to be responsible for making anyone else feel bad like that.
Besides he wasn't ugly anyway. She didn't really like that weird male smell he had but it wasn't all that bad, just different from her female scent. His eyes were exactly the same as Baby's and she was beautiful. Hopefully she'd inherit more of his physical attributes than hers.
She hadn't meant to be mean to him. She knew it was just his instincts that made him need to be close to Baby. However having him as close as he was made her uneasy. For some reason it reminded her of that time she'd had to trade with Groper to stop him killing Ana.
She knew he didn't want to trade with her. Ana had told them that it was went against transgenic males territorial instincts to hurt their own kind. She'd told them that when she'd reassured them that their instinct to resist trading with the guards had been absolutely right. Despite the fact that the guards had said it was expected of them and that they were just to young and dumb to understand that.
"I don't really think you're ugly," she whispered.
Absolutely secure in the fact he wasn't ugly and unable to understand what the hell was going on inside her weird head Tav stared back at her.
"Go to sleep." He closed his own eyes in the hope she'd get the hint.
Still feeling mean Julia's remorseful eyes roamed the angles and plains of his face lingering on the heavy sweep of dark lashes shielding his now closed eyes. I like his mouth. Its like babies too, maybe, but different.
"Do you have a mate?"
Someone as smart and as alpha as him was bound to have a mate. Ana had told them all about being mated. She knew that Susie and some of her other females had thought that when they were free they might like to try it. She hadn't wanted to though. Ana and Susie and the rest of her females were beautiful. She knew from some of the books they'd stolen from the guards that males liked females who were beautiful. So no male would be likely to choose her to mate with even if she wanted them to and she didn't.
"Of course I'm not." Tav's eyes snapped open. What the hell do you take me for?" he asked indignantly.
Not really understanding the meaning of his words but hearing the impatient, annoyance she was so used to hearing when she didn't understand something or she was getting things wrong Julia felt old familiar feeling of inadequacy. I'm never going to be able to learn enough for anyone who wasn't born in the Labs to not be mean to me.
He hadn't really meant to snap at her but if as Alec said, she wasn't fucked in the head, then she should know he'd hardly be here without his mate if he had one. Not liking the look she'd had in her eyes before they'd dropped from his he suddenly didn't feel so good.
"Goodnight," she mumbled her lips against Baby's head as she closed her eyes and snuggled into her for comfort. It didn't matter that he didn't have enough respect for her to be nice. That was nothing new in her experience with males anyway.
It was a shame that he wasn't the really cool and nice person Ana had told her he was, but it wasn't Ana's fault. He didn't treat Ana meanly she'd seen that today. He loved Ana. They all loved Ana she thought wistfully remembering all the attention Little Todd had attracted even though he was still asleep. It didn't matter what he or anybody else thought of her anyway. She had Baby and she would learn all about the world at the same time Baby did. After all if stupid bastards like Groper lived in it how hard could it be?
She'd so wanted baby's genetic contributor to think well of her. He'd sounded so nice and kind when Ana had told them about him. But he was so disappointingly unkind. It had felt so good when he'd said she was doing everything right to make baby well again. But he hadn't really meant it. He'd only said it so she'd let him as close to baby as his instincts needed him to be.
For some reason the comfort she usually got from cuddling baby wasn't stopping the tears now sliding down her cheeks. Being free was so weird. When she'd dreamed about it she'd never thought it would feel sad and scary like this. Everything just felt so strange and she was so afraid that she wouldn't get things right.
In the first few months after her birth she'd really tried so hard to get things right. She'd done everything the guards had said just so they wouldn't yell and be mean to her. However the need to do that had died pretty quickly once she'd realized they were not only impossible to please them but they were such mean bastards she didn't even want too. Once Groper had introduced the idea of trading that was the end of her need to please. Like hell she was letting any of the bastards touch her or any of her females.
She was a good mother. She knew she was. It didn't matter what anyone else thought. Baby was going to have the best life she vowed squeezing her eyes tight to stop the flow of tears and moving her head so they weren't wetting baby's head.
He still hadn't moved away and being this close to his male scent was making her uneasy. For a brief minute she thought about turning right around and taking Baby with her. But that wouldn't be fair. His instinct to be near his own scent was as strong as hers. As long as she could she wouldn't interfere with that but she was free now and that meant she didn't have to be around people who were mean to her and she certainly didn't want unkind males around Baby.
Fuck. Not fucking crying. What I hell did I say that was so bad anyway. Nothing. Fuck she's so touchy.
"I didn't mean to snap at you. I'm sorry. I'm just tired that's all." Even he could hear the grudging impatience in his voice. What is it about her that just irritates the fuck out of me?
Julia raised her head and her thoughtful eyes caught his. This was the second time he'd said he was sorry to her. At least the last time he'd sounded like he meant it.
"Don't be sorry. Just don't be mean to me again."
Tav blinked in surprise. "I'm not mean. I…" he broke off when the blanket slipped off her shoulder again. This time revealing not only her taped collarbone but also the rainbow of colourful bruises and abrasions now visible where the neckline of the top she was wearing had dropped away.
"That must have happened before you went up the wire. The one you kicked in the nuts was he one of them?" he asked his calm voice belying his mounting rage as his gaze moved from her bruised shoulder to her eyes. The gutless fucks. Where the hell was the baby when they were doing that?
Quickly Julia went to pull the blanket up forgetting about her sore shoulder. Her quiet little mew of pain made Tav even angrier. Her eyes went back to his when he carefully pulled the blanket back up over her and Baby again.
"Yeah, Groper and his men when they first tried to take Baby two days ago."
Two fucking days ago. Tav stared wordlessly back at her imaging what could have happened if they had managed to successfully remove the baby two days ago. She could have been anywhere by now. He closed his eyes on the rush of panic just the thought of that caused.
"You and your females did really well resisting them for so long."
"The gutless fucks will pay for that," he added his expression hard as his eyes moved from her bandaged shoulder now hidden by the blanket to her eyes. Shane can forget first fucking reserve. He'll have to share that bastard with me.
"I know how to protect Baby. I am good mother. You don't have to be here," she challenged her eyes steady on his.
He knew he should agree she was a good mother. It was the least he owed her for keeping the Baby safe in this hellhole for as long as she had. But if he agreed with her she might think he was saying she was a good enough mother to be able to continue protecting the baby on her own without him. When she wasn't. A baby was supposed to have two parents protecting it. That's what males had territorial instincts for. Even ordinary males had an instinct to protect their young. It was a pissant weak one, but even they had it.
"You won't have to from now on I'll be protecting her."
"No," Julia said in alarm. " I can do it. I am mother. I protect Baby."
"Yeah, I know you can," Tav added quickly his hand going to her arm when she tried to get up.
"I just meant I want to help you." Hastily he withdrew his hand when she slapped at it like she had in the plane.
"You aren't taking her off me," she hissed.
"I don't want to take her off you," he shot back genuinely shocked.
"You think I'm to stupid to look after Baby properly."
"No I don't. Well I don't now," he clarified uncomfortably when she glared disbelievingly at him. "I didn't think you were stupid exactly. Just weird," he lied. "But I don't now that Alec's told me your not…" he trailed off realizing he was making it worse
"I've already told you I'm just young and still learning," she said rolling her eyes in exasperated impatience. "You must be the stupid one if you don't understand that."
Tav pushed down his immediate flare of irritation and bit back his instinctive retort in the hope that if he just shut up she would lie back down again. She needed to get some sleep so she could look after the baby when she woke up.
His relief when she sank back down onto the mattress was so strong that it annoyed him. He had to protect the baby. He accepted that. She was small and defenceless and needed him but her irritating mother was another story. He wasn't getting sucked into worrying about her as well.
"No, I'm not stupid. But you're right I don't understand. Perhaps you'd like to explain?" Resisting the urge to roll his eyes heaven ward he waited expectantly. Alec is so loosing it. If he thinks this female has all her marbles then in my other life I'm Spiderman.
"I was only born eighteen months ago. So I've not had much time to learn stuff. At first we all went to school and they gave us books to read and stuff," she sighed wistfully. "But when Manticore burned they said there was no more money for that and we had to earn our keep by breeding."
"So you only went to school for eighteen months," Tav clarified carefully. Okay. Having been in the equivalent of school for a good portion of his nineteen years Tav could understand how having had only eighteen months worth could be a handicap. But what the hell has that got to do with being born eighteen months ago.
Julia could tell he still didn't understand. Not surprising, it had been the same when she'd had to explain it to a continuous succession of incredulous Manticore born transgenics today. They might know a lot more stuff than her but they needed new things explained to them really carefully.
"Have you been to the Labs today?" she asked patiently.
"No. My unit was on point while we secured the outer buildings. The Labs were already secure. I didn't have any reason to go there. Why?"
"Because if you'd gone there you would have seen the tanks that my females and I grew in until eighteen months ago."
"Yeah, Okay then," he smiled brightly at a complete loss as to what to say to her. "Time to go to sleep now. I'm really tired." Feigning a yawn he closed his eyes, the uncomfortable unease he'd felt since he'd first laid eyes on the baby turning into full blown panic. This is worse than I thought. How the hell can I protect that baby with this fruit loop for a mother?
His eyes snapped open when she kicked him.
Having regained his attention Julia glared in impatient irritation. "I'm too tired to explain it to you. Ask Ana in the morning and go and have a look at the Labs." She closed her exhausted eyes in the hope of going to sleep. I'll be no good to Baby or my females tomorrow if I don't sleep.
It had been nearly three days since she'd slept and her body had gone past the tired stage into hyper alert, so it took a while for her mind to stop thinking about all the things she had to do tomorrow. She could hear his steady breathing beside her and he was close enough for her to feel the heat coming off his body. With her eyes closed so she couldn't see him it didn't seem so strange to be this close to him. His familiar scent, so like Baby's, mixed with that male smell he had was actually strangely comforting, as was his hand still beside hers on Baby's back.
She'd seen how far away the males in his pack had made the perimeter of objects now surrounding their sleeping territory. That meant that their instincts for threat had to be stronger than hers. Her safe zone to detect danger had to be less than half of theirs. That's what was comforting. These males would wake up before her if there were any danger. It felt safe to sleep. A strange feeling but I think I like it.
Tav's eyes snapped awake. Threat. No, not threat he realized in the same instant his eyes found Julia. It was still dark but his night vision quickly zeroed in on the baby who was now snuffling around wriggling under the hand he still had on her back.
Exhausted and disorientated Julia had already settled Baby against her breast and she was sucking strongly before she groggily realized that Baby had finally woken up.
"What are you looking at," she hissed snapping properly awake when her sleepy eyes encountered Tav's.
His absorbed fascination turned to embarrassment when she hastily pulled her top down in an attempt to cover her breast.
"I was looking at the Baby not at you. What the hell do you take me for?" he snapped back indignantly.
"A dirty bastard just like the guards,"she spat back.
"Well I'm not like the guards." He ground out through gritted teeth. Fuck. "I was looking at my daughter. Not at you. If you think that the sight of your, your… He'd been about to say tit but somehow that didn't seem the right word in this circumstance. "Your breast," he said finally feeling like a complete dickwit. "Holds any fucking interest for me then you're sadly mistaken."
"Fuck off, you bastard."
"I'm not going anywhere." He snapped back. She's mine too and when she's finished I want to have a proper look at her," he snapped back keeping his eyes firmly fixed above Julia's neck. When the small sounds the baby was making suddenly ceased his eyes dropped involuntarily, only to find she'd stopped sucking and had turned her head so she could see him.
"Hey," he said softly his finger stroking her soft little cheek.
Her feelings mixed Julia watched Baby stare at him in fascination. Baby liked him. She could tell that immediately. She wasn't tense and upset like she always got when the guard's stink got to close. She likes his scent and his voice she though when Baby's eyes got even rounder when he spoke.
"I didn't think she'd be this aware. How old is she anyway?"
"Nearly four months,"
Her round, curious eyes and her cute pursed little mouth made Tav smile. When her little face mimicked his and she smiled back he laughed in delight.
"She smiled at me."
"She only ever smiles at females. She must really like you." Julia added grudgingly. It was hard not to feel jealous that he'd had Baby's first smile when she woke.
Tav studied her little face with the same curious intensity she was looking at him. Until she finally turned back to Julia. Settling back on his elbow he forgot all about keeping his eyes above Julia's neck and watched in fascination marvelling at how her little ear would move rhythmically as she sucked.
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"Fuck of Todd," Ana snapped when Todd gestured for Jane to move along so he could lie down. Ignoring Ana he inserted himself into the very small space that Jane with a roll of her eyes had made in an effort to appease both of them. When Ana angrily moved the baby and herself to face the other way, presenting Todd with her back, he calmly grabbed her shoulder and jerked her onto her back so he could see his son.
Ignoring Ana he inspected the baby. He knew he hadn't woken up yet because he'd been talking to Cass about his progress. It's so fucking worrying. He's so little. Gently he felt his forehead for any signs of the clamminess that Cass had said signalled dehydration in a baby. Warm so that's good. His eyes went to Ana whose face was now as uncertain as it was hostile
I hate him like this. What happened to amiable, tolerant Todd? He's being so demanding and fucking unreasonable about everything. He's not my mate and I don't owe him anything.
Todd met her hostile stare calmly. That baby is mine as well as hers and I'm not letting her cut me out. She's may not want me for his father but I am. He's mine to protect and that's the end of it. She can fucking well get used to it.
Her skin that normally had an olive tinge to it was white and her expression was strained and tired. "Hows your arm?" Because he'd asked Dex he already knew that the bullet had passed straight through and she only had a mild flesh wound but concern and care for Ana was an ingrained habit for him.
Ana ignored him.
It was just so good to have her back.Even bad tempered and scowling at him like this.To just be able to go to sleep without worrying about where she was and if she was alright was such a weight of his mind, even if he still had the new worry of the baby's fragile condition.
My son, he repeated in his head. It was still hard to believe he had a child let alone that he had one with Ana. In the back of his mind he'd always wondered what would have happened if like Cloud he'd fought for the right to approach her. He'd always wondered if he might have had a chance with her if he'd just let her see him as someone other than her dependable, pack member always there when she needed him but forgettable otherwise.
She'd certainly given him his answer today when she'd said she'd never have picked him as her Baby's father. There had been no misunderstanding the scorn he'd heard in her voice. Just as well he'd never told her how he felt. At least he'd kept his pride.
Ana watched the expressions come and go on his face. He'd really pissed her off today but it was still so good to have found him alive. Of all her pack he was the one she'd always been the closest too. The one she'd missed the most. That was why it had all seemed so perfect and right when she'd scented her baby for the first time and realized that Todd was his genetic contributor. She'd been pleased that even though he was dead a part of him still lived on in his son.
She'd always wondered what Todd would have thought about her having his son. Well she'd certainly had her answer today. Where the hell did he get off being angry with her anyway? It's not my fault. I didn't ask them to impregnate me with his sperm.
He's probably only worried about how a baby will affect his chances of nailing everything that moves. He's bound to still be slutting around with every female who looks his way. Just as well he never found out how hot I used to be for him. How mortifyingly embarrassing that would have been. I was so lucky Cloud came forward and I fell in love with him.
As usual she felt the welling of sadness she felt whenever she thought of Cloud. Nobody could have hoped for a better mate. She could feel the tears start behind her eyes. If only he was still here to help me now.
"I'm really sorry about Cloud," Todd said quietly reading her thoughts in her face. "Your scent was still on him when we found his body and we looked for you until we had no choice but to bug out."
"Yeah, I knew you'd be looking. One of the Quintella scientists just happened to be at Manticore collecting samples when the shit hit the fan. He collected up as many injured females as he could find, threw us in the back of his van and bought us back here. Everybody else died on the trip back." She swallowed remembering the pain and horror of that ride as females she couldn't see or help, but she could smell and hear, had bleed and died around her.
"When I came to at Quintella there was only me left," she added in a small voice remembering how devastated she'd been to find herself still alive. Cloud had just died in her arms and she thought her unit were all dead as well and she'd grieved for all of them.
Now that Todd was alive she felt an incredible guilt that her sorrow had been as great for him as it had been for Cloud. In the back of her mind she knew that guilt was the reason she'd been so aggressive and dismissive when he'd tried to stake his claim to the baby. She shouldn't be feeling this joy and relief that he was alive. Not when Cloud her mate was dead.
Todd's eyes roamed her face lingering on the curve of her cheek and the long dark sweep of lashes as they shielded the grief he knew would be in her now downcast eyes. "Dale brought his body with us when we evac'd," he said gently. "He's buried in the hills outside Seattle. We didn't mark his grave so the bastards couldn't find him but I remember the spot. I'll take you there when we get back to Seattle if you like."
At the moment everything just felt so overwhelming. Not only was she worried about her baby but everything had changed again. She'd always hated even little changes. She liked to know where she was and the only way she ever knew that was if things weren't going so fast she couldn't even catch her breath.
Todd wasn't her baby's father he was just the male genetic contributor that was all he was. He'd just have to work his instincts around that as best he could and stop being demanding. They weren't mated and she owed him nothing. Her baby belonged to her and her alone. I'm responsible for him and I'll do things in my own way and in my own time, not Todd's.
"Dale will take me," she said coldly moving onto her side again and turning her back to him.
Todd stared at the rigid line of her shoulders. He knew she was as concerned about the baby as he was. He could feel her anxiety and tension. Before all this, before Manticore burned he would have just put his arm around her and offered her his body warmth and his comfort.
He wanted to do it now but he instinctively knew she wouldn't welcome it. Sharing that baby with her had changed everything between them. In the past she'd often been moody and unpredictable but there had still always been friendship between them. Now all he could feel was hostility from her. Which is weird because if anything I feel closer to her.
He understood her grief for Cloud. He'd felt that same grief when he'd thought she was dead so he knew what it felt like. He couldn't bring Cloud back and nor could he see the point of her trying to live in his shadow. She wasn't dead. She was alive and life went on. The baby was proof of that. If she wanted this hostility between them then there was nothing he could do about it but he wasn't being relegated to the background. He was going to be involved in that boy's life as his father. He's going to know he belongs to me.
"What's his name anyway?" he asked into the silence. The fact that he didn't even know this simple thing about his son highlighting even more the strangeness of their situation.
"Does he have a name yet?" he repeated impatiently. If she thought that he was going to back off because she was making everything fucking difficult then she was dreaming.
"His name is Todd," she hissed finally, hunching even further away from him.
Todd lay there in stunned silence. He knew it was a good sign. He didn't know what it signified exactly but he knew it was good. Grinning like an idiot he closed his eyes. We'll have to call him Little Todd or it will get to confusing.
TBC
Please review. I know this chapter has less Alec and Max in it but that's just the way its flowing at the moment.
