Well, here is chapter three of Love and Marriage. I don't like it that much, but it'll do. So, hope you all enjoy!
As usual, thanks to my reviewers: Mrs. Nikki Slater, Shawna-xo, and JessesLatinaQuerida. Ya'll rock.
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Sitting at my vanity, I stared blankly into the mirror, staring at, myself. My hair was sitting upon my shoulder, and my hand grasped my hairbrush, yet I did nothing. I could not get Jesse out of my thoughts. All day today, I kept seeing him in places where he wasn't at. When I went into town with mother, I thought I saw him at the corner of a street, but then I blinked and it was someone else entirely. A while after, I saw him inside the tailor's shop, his back facing me, the man turned around and it was not Jesse. 'Seeing' him only made me think of him more. I could not stop my memories from spinning around Jesse.
Why can't it be Jesse I have to marry instead? I found myself thinking, and my cheeks flushed, even though no one could ever hear that thought. My mother noticed that I was very distracted today, so rather than helping her out downstairs, she sent me to my room. Being by myself, with no distractions, my mind cluttered even more with all thoughts on Jesse. He has this effect on me, and he is so captivating. I don't know how long ago my mother had sent me up to my room, but it did seem to be quite a while. When my gaze averted from the mirror at last, I noticed the sun going back down. A day ago, at this time, I had been on my secret cove with Jesse-the only other person I can think of that knows of the place. Hopefully Paul will never know about it.
I stood from my vanity, my hand lifting from the brush and I walked to my window. Setting my hands on the ledge, I leaned over the window and my face touched the cool night air outside my window. I opened my eyes, and I could see the glimmering ocean far off, just like it did every day. Enthralled with the view, I did not notice the carriage that pulled up the house beneath my window. When I heard that voice, I knew who exactly the carriage belonged to.
"Ah, Susannah, eagerly expecting my arrival I see? I knew you'd come around soon enough," his voice was laced with all the smugness that only a jerk like himself can utter.
His voice alone could've been enough to cause me to fall over the window ledge if I didn't have my grasp on it, as it chills me to the bone every time I hear it. I withdrew myself from the window, taking one last look in the mirror, and headed downstairs when I heard the front door creak to a close. At the top of the stairwell I could see Paul standing, his poise making his seem grand and significant. Only Paul will let himself into the house of another and stand in a way that clearly says: 'I am so much better than you.'
"Suze, I knew you would be expecting me. But waiting for me leaning out your window, that is just a little too overzealous, don't you think?" His arms were perfectly folded across his perfect chest over his perfect clothes. Paul is so far from perfect, but everything else about him… well, it's perfect. How can it not be? His family is, after all, the richest in all of Carmel.
Jesse, though, his family is also very wealthy, they own the largest ranch, but Jesse doesn't go around flaunting everything he's got. Jesse is very modest in the way he is. He doesn't make those around him fell less and inferior.
"As if I would ever want you, Paul. I already know that at the end of this week, our marriage will be off. I only agreed to this so my step-father could get some justice out of this. He never should have made this decision for me." I eyed him down icily, his blue eyes looking back longingly at me. He is so impossible!
I took a step towards him, standing only inches away from him. "Get it through your big head, Slater," my finger was pointing madly at his head, "You and I will never be together."
Before I had a chance to back away, his hands clutched at my elbows, drawing me in closer to him. I struggled in his grip, trying my hardest to wrench away, to no avail. His head lowered into the crook between my neck and shoulder, his breath tickling the exposed skin. His breathing heavy and labored, he plunged his mouth onto my neck. I shuddered at the sensation, actually enjoying it, and I didn't struggle anymore. His lips trailed across my neck, and when he got to my ear, he nibbled at it. That one action jolted me back into reality, and I realized that I let Paul kiss me along my neck. I shuddered again, this time not from joy. With all the strength I could muster, I finally pushed him away and quickly took all the steps back I could before he reached out and took me back in.
"Paul, don't do that, again," I hissed the last word with venomously.
The cocky jerk smirked at my half-threat. "I know you enjoyed it, Suze. Stop fighting with me and yourself, because deep down, you know you enjoyed it. And if you could get over this supposed hate of yours, you could feel that and much, much more…" his voice trailed off seductively.
The pig! Does he not know how to treat woman? No respected gentleman in his right mind should ever say such a thing to a woman. "You," I hissed, "are a pig. And I will never enjoy anything you can offer me!" I stomped back up the stairs, not even knowing why I had come down in the first place.
The last thing I heard as I slammed my door was, "I wouldn't mind the mud so much as long you're in it with me," and then a chuckle. A sick, demented chuckle, reverberating through my walls, through my ears, through my mind, I could hear it right outside my door, and I prayed to God that I'd had enough sense to lock it behind me. As I checked to see, the knob slowly started turning. I panicked, I didn't lock it! Paul was coming in.
He stepped through over the threshold, standing in the doorway, another smirk traced along his perfect delicate features. "Honestly, I expected more of you, a fight. Leading me to the bedroom? Now Suze, someone of such purity such as yourself should not be so… tempting." His arms folded over his chest once again, and he leaned against the door frame, a look of pure desire gleaming in his eyes.
I nearly choked when his comment reached my ears, as if the words themselves somehow slithered around my neck, cutting off my breath. "Paul, get out of my room!" I wanted to shout every obscenity that I knew at him, but I restricted myself. I would not stoop to such a low level. I silently cursed him, running those obscenities over and over in my head. He grinned at me from the door, obviously finding the situation rather amusing. "Get out!" My voice pierced through the air, and my finger pointed past him.
How does he respond? He chuckles, dropping his arms from his chest and taking a step in. "I wasn't ever in your room, Suze, I was at the doorway," with each word he took another step towards me. Slow, lingering steps. With each step he took forward, I took one backwards. Eventually, though the wall would block my path and I would not be able to step back further.
I gulped. There was barely any floor space left. "Don't call me Suze… only my friends can call me that."
He chuckled. Again. Its laugh at Susannah day. "If I remember correctly, Suze," he enunciated the word with pristine clarity, "I'm the one who first started calling you that. So, that is what I will choose to call you, Suze. Besides, if you don't play nice, I met let the world know about your secret." He's already threatened me once with that. Is it possible he might actually tell people that I see dead people? Paul is the type of person that does just as he says, and you never realize until the damage has been caused. But… I'm not the only one, he sees them too. I know he does. Of course, everyone would believe Paul Slater over poor little Susannah Simon. God damn him and his family.
"Need I remind you Paul, that unless you've forgotten, the last time I checked, you could too very well see the dead?"
His head threw back in laughter, "Ah, yes that would be true. But who, I ask, would believe you over me? Unless you've forgotten," he mocked my words, "I am Paul Slater, son of Michael Slater, town doctor and local rancher. And who are you? Susannah Simon? Daughter of who… oh that's right, no one would care about your real father or step-father. Either way, you're no one. So, please don't make me laugh." That hurt, it really truly did hurt. I know my family isn't anywhere near as important as his, but doesn't have to go and throw it in my face, that he is supposedly better because of whom he is and where he comes from.
My eyes stung, and I blinked, not wanting to let myself shed any tears in front of this monster of a man. I was pressed against the wall now and Paul was only steps away, a malicious grin plastered on his face. His hands took a hold of my hips and he brought me in closer to him. I breathed in his scent-of sweat, work, wood, horses-all mixing to make an enticing aroma. I don't think anyone knows what Paul really is like… not his family, not my family, not his friends-except for Jesse-no one. They all think he is the ideal son, one to never do any wrong. Is everyone else so blinded by this façade, that they've never seen Paul for who he really is? They still see him as the same sweet eighteen year-old he once was… four years ago.
My hands tugged against his alongside my hips, but his grasp was to firm. "Paul, please don't. Stop it, please." I begged against him as he kept pulling me in closer to him.
"Susie, we're going to be married soon. There's nothing wrong with this," and his lips met mine. The sweet bubbly taste of wine lingered in his mouth as his lips kissed mine intensifying by the second. I will not allow myself to respond, I thought to myself. His lips pressed against mine, but I did not falter, I didn't kiss him back, instead I struggled to get out of his grasp.
"Everything about this is wrong, Paul. Please, let me go!"
"Fine!" he hissed into the air, "If that's what you want, then that's what you get," his hands slid up to my arms and forcefully he shoved me back against the wall. My head thunked against the wall and he retreated out of my room, his footsteps roaring behind him.
"Susie, is everything all right up there?" My mother's innocent sweet voice rang through the air.
Paul beat me to a repines before I even had a chance, "Everything is fine Mrs. Ackerman. Susannah simply stumbled over her own feet. That daughter of yours can be quite graceless," a kind chuckle erupted from his lips, as if this were funny, but I could here the malevolent off tones. My mother, sadly chuckled lightheartedly with him
"Oh, if only you knew, mother. If only you knew." I whispered into the air, my voice being carried away into the emptiness of my room.
"Will you be staying for supper, Paul? We have more than enough if you would like to." My mother asked Paul. I desperately hope he says no. Reject the offer, Paul I willed with my mind.
"I'd love too," came his cheery response. Imbecile.
For the next half hour or so, Paul kept his distance; that is until I was called down for dinner. His head poked through my doorway, and he looked at me a moment before speaking, as if contemplating whether to apologize or not. Of course, expecting an apology of any sort was just an expectation, nothing more. "Supper is ready," and he retreated away from my room
As I headed away from my room, my brother-step brother-David headed out of his room, too. "Susannah, what is the matter? You don't look to happy," the poor kid, he's so sweet with his red hair and freckles, why should I taint his mind with what is bothering me, he doesn't need to know.
"Nothing, David. I'm just thinking, that's all." I pulled the little guy into me, my arm around his shoulders and we headed into the dining room together, my arm still lovingly draped over his shoulder. Paul glared at us, and I noticed the he was sitting right next to my usual spot at the table. So perfect. Not.
Supper, was abnormally long today, with the addition of Paul as he tried to sweet talk my family. Through out the whole meal, he did not stay quite. He complimented my mother ruthlessly on the meal, he asked my father about his business, conversed with my two step brothers, Jake and Brad, about what is going on in their life, and with David about how his schooling is going, him being the smartest of the Ackerman-Simon children. So, my family, I can easily say are very well charmed with Mr. Paul Slater and his good-looking, good-boy ways. Why am I the only one who can see beyond this? Why?
This is only going to make it harder when I tell my father that I do not intend to carry on with the marriage to Paul. There is just no way.
I ticked off the days I would have to spend with Paul, two down, four long miserable ones yet to come. I can not wait. Worst of all, I won't see Jesse because of Paul.
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Chapter four to be posted sometime soon, I hope.