Authors Note: Thanks masamor99 and emilygilmore for your reviews. You don't know how happy they're making me.
Chapter 5: Practical Joke
It's Wednesday already and Richard and I haven't talked since last Friday. Why is it always my turn to reach out to him? I'm taking the phone.
"Richard Gilmore speaking."
"Hello Richard. It's Emily."
"Hello."
Silence – I hate this.
"I thought I would come by Friday morning to pack our things for the weekend."
Have you lost your voice Richard? – Say something!
"So is this okay with you? If not make another suggestion."
"That's quite alright Emily."
"Good – so I'm coming around ten. I'll get our things packed, we have lunch and then we'll drive to the Dragonfly."
"Sounds fine to me."
"Good."
Another awkward silence. What's wrong with you Richard?
"Well I'll see you on Friday, Richard. Goodbye then."
"Goodbye Emily."
I really hope he will change during the weekend. All this silence is getting on my nerves.
We're having lunch. Silent lunch. Our things are nearly packed. Since Lorelai wasn't very specific with her invitation I had the maid pack for all kind of events. At least we're prepared then, though I can just imagine Lorelai's comment when she's seeing this.
Since Richard isn't saying anything I'll try again.
"Is there any special book you want me to pack for you? I bet you have a lot of time to read there."
"No, I'm getting my newspapers. I hadn't much time to read them lately. Have a lot to catch up."
Oh yes, you have a lot to catch up, and I'm not referring to the newspapers. For a moment I consider to actually say this to him, but then where's the use of it? We would argue and perhaps he would change his mind. And I want him to go there.
"So please Richard, let's act as nice to each other as we can when others are watching us."
"Emily I'm eating. I don't want you to give me instructions. I'm not your child."
We finish our lunch in silence.
"Richard! Richard it's time to leave." I'm yelling through the house.
Why can't he answer? Or at least come?
"Richard! I don't want to be late!"
Finally he's coming.
"Do you have to yell like that Emily?"
"Richard please – you're late, I don't want to be the last one to arrive." I say more quietly, but a little annoyed.
"Well I'm here now and not deaf so please lower your voice."
"I'm not yelling anymore – so hurry, hurry."
With that I'm out of the door. He's following me – slowly. Just keep calm Emily.
Inside the car he's silent – quelle surprise – so I start to talk again.
"I had Sriva pack your black suit. I think you should change for dinner."
"Hm."
"I don't know if you have to though – Lorelai wasn't very specific, so if it's an informal dinner what you wear might do it, too."
"Hm."
"Richard please – are you able to say a decent word to me? Or do I have to talk to Mr 'Hm' for the rest of the day."
"Emily please – just let me drive there in silence."
"But I don't want to be silent. We have to talk there, and the way I see it we even have to practice it, and this is the perfect opportunity."
He's turning on the radio. How rude. I turn it off.
"Richard please."
"Emily stop it. Not everything is going your way. You wanted me to come. I'm here. You can't force me to talk. And don't turn off the radio, or you can walk there" he says raising his voice.
"You wouldn't dare to throw me out."
"You better don't risk that." he replies and something in his voice makes me wonder if he's serious.
I decide not to risk anything. Besides we're nearly there.
As soon as we arrive I start to talk again.
"Oh look at this property Richard. It's beautiful. Don't you agree?"
"Hm."
And right now I want to slap him. Why can't he talk decently? We walk into the Lobby, followed by our luggage.
"Oh, Mom, Dad! Look, Rory, there are your grandparents and everything they own."
I knew she would make this kind of comment. Somehow it satisfies me that I know her this well.
"You didn't tell us what attire was required, so I had to pack everything." I reply.
"Hi, Grandma. Hi, Grandpa. We're so glad you could come."
She appears to be normal – I don't think she knows. One more reason for us to be civil with each other.
"May we have our key? I'm tired from the drive." Richard says.
Oh, please Richard.
"It takes twenty minutes to get here." Lorelai answers.
"It felt longer."
Don't play the martyr Richard. I can't believe he's already complaining. But I have to pretend not to notice this, so I'm asking Lorelai, where our room is.
"You're in our nicest room."
Well I hope so, after dragging us here, that's the least you can do.
"Guys, will you take my parents to room twelve? The boys will take you there."
"Where are they going?" I wonder.
"Just follow them, Mom."
"They're heading outside."
"Yes. Your room has its own entrance for privacy."
If I wasn't suspicious before I sure as hell am now. What's with this whole outside/privacy thing? But again – pretend you haven't noticed Emily.
"Oh. Well, fine. We'll see you later, Rory."
Richard and I are following our luggage. They're bringing it into a cabin – I can't believe this. It's not even in the hotel anymore – it's a cabin outside. Entrance for privacy – oh yes I was right to be suspicious.
Richard and I are standing in an one-room cabin. Granted it's a big room, but oh how would we have preferred a suite. We're alone and staring at each other.
"Well I think I'll unpack." I say.
"Hm."
"Richard I swear if you say this one more time, …"
"Then what?"
Too many answers. But all would lead to an argument. So I decide to change the subject.
"I'm going outside – looking at the garden."
"I thought you wanted to unpack."
"I've changed my mind."
Outside I take a deep breath. I'm walking around the property. It really is beautiful. Lorelai can be proud of it. I am proud of her – though I would never admit it to her. Being alone calms me down. I know I can be lucky, that everyone is busy inside – I don't want anyone to see me here.
Richard and I really are not used to each other anymore – funny how fast this goes. A few hours and we do nothing but arguing. And I thought he would be different here, but no way.
I have to get back inside, I know this. Otherwise people will see me. But I'm looking forward to dinner. Hopefully someone nice will be at our table – Rory perhaps.
When I come inside the cabin again, Richard is reading his newspaper.
"The garden is beautiful."
"Hm. – Yes." he corrects himself.
Is he listening to me? Perhaps there's hope for us afterall.
"I don't think you have to change into your black suit. It didn't look very formal to me in the lobby."
"If you say so."
"Yes. So what are you reading?"
"The newspaper."
"Yes, I can see that." I answer with a little sarcasm.
"Then why are you asking?"
"I meant what article are you reading right now?"
"Something about business – not interesting for you."
"How can you say that?"
"Because I know you."
"Well if you'd know me so well, do you think we would be at the point where we currently are?"
"What are you talking about?"
"Exactly my point."
"Emily, I told you I have a lot to catch up, please let me read in silence." he answers somewhat annoyed.
"But that's not why we came here."
Crap, I have to pay attention to what I'm saying.
"What do you mean?"
"Nothing."
"Well then be quiet."
"Richard Gilmore, you're not telling me what to do." I say raising my voice.
Suddenly he stands up and leaves.
"Richard, where are you going? You're not leaving aren't you?"
"I'm going for a walk. Alone."
With that he's outside. It's not going to happen – our talk. I feel it. I begin to unpack a few things. Then I'm trying to read my novel, but I can't concentrate. I'm searching for a TV or at least a radio, but nothing. How could Lorelai do this to us? How could she stuck us in here like this? This is none of her business. As if she hasn't other things to worry about right now.
Why isn't Richard coming back? I do hope he hasn't left. Just when I really begin to worry he comes inside.
"You're right – the garden is beautiful."
"Yes, isn't it? – I think we can leave for dinner now. It's almost time."
One second after I've finished that sentence, the room service comes and brings us our dinner. Roast beef and champagne. How thoughtful of Lorelai. Richard and I are both looking tortured. If it weren't so sad I might even be able to laugh at the picture. Both of us sitting in a cabin, before us a candlelight dinner – the least romantic one you can imagine.
"I wonder what her next plan will be." I say breaking the silence.
"Whose?"
"Lorelai's of course."
"Hm."
Ok, I'm going to ignore this from now on otherwise it's going to make me crazy. How can Lorelai force me to stay with him here? How could I had let this happen? I don't think I can take it any longer. But I have to try.
"How long do you think we have to stay here tomorrow?" Richard asks interrupting my thoughts.
"Is that all you can think about – leaving?"
"Aren't you?"
"Richard this was not my idea." I say annoyed.
"We wouldn't miss it for the world – of course it was your idea."
"It was Lorelai's and you know it. And I'm tired of having this discussion again. – I don't know how long we have to stay – perhaps until Sunday."
"You can't be serious."
"For the last time, I don't know what Lorelai's up to. But I will find out now." I add standing up.
"Where are you going?"
"To find her – to give her some piece of my mind."
I'm storming out of the cabin. Richard isn't following me. Well he doesn't like to fight. But I'm just in the mood now. I wonder if she has set up a video camera in the cabin to watch all of this later. I bet it would amuse her. But then it didn't look as if there were electricity. Who does she think she is – to imprison us there? And who does she think we are? We are her parents and our problems are none of her business. And I'm going to tell her this right now. I barge into the lobby – luckily she's there. so I don't have to search for her.
"Lorelai Gilmore, why would you do that!"
"Do what?"
Oh please, don't play dumb.
"You stuck your father and me out in that Godforsaken cabin!"
"It's the honeymoon suite."
"One room, no access to the main building, pitch-black at night."
"It's romantic."
Yes very.
"No television, no radio."
"Actually there is a television. It's in the cabinet behind—"
So there is electricity.
"And then the room service."
"Roast beef and champagne."
"The one chance to get out of there, away from each other, and you yank it away!"
"Why would you want to get away from each other, Mom? Are you and Dad fighting?"
Don't play naïve Lorelai. In case you haven't noticed I'm not going to buy it anymore.
"Stop it! You know! You know your father and I are separated, and you brought us out here and stuck us in the woods to stare at each other for 48 hours!"
"What was I supposed to do? You weren't saying anything, Dad wasn't saying anything."
Ha, so you knew. I knew it. But then again, how could you?
"Of all the cruel, insensitive – "
"How was I supposed to know I was supposed to know?"
As if that would matter.
"You did know!"
"But you didn't want me to know."
If you knew me only a little bit that would be obvious. But with this weekend you've forced me to change my strategy. Perhaps that was your plan. To humiliate me. Because you knew we wouldn't make it and I would admit it in the end.
"Of course I didn't want you to know."
"Exactly."
"Exactly what?"
"You didn't want me to know, so I didn't know, and now you're mad I didn't know?"
"Because you did know!"
And don't play your games with me Lorelai. I'm certainly not in the mood for this.
"But I wasn't supposed to know, so I acted like I didn't know!"
"And then you forced your father and me to come here tonight under pretense of family obligation."
"Well, hello, that's the Gilmore way."
Maybe she has a point here. This leads to nothing. So I'll change the topic.
"I won't stay out in that cabin one more second. I demand a room in here."
"We don't have any rooms in here, Mom. They're all taken."
And why does this sound familiar? Ah yes, the Bracebridge Dinner. Why haven't you learned from this Lorelai? It's always good to have one free room.
"Then bump someone."
"Can't you and Dad just talk about it?"
Haven't I made myself clear? You better stay out of this.
"No, you stop it right now! This is none of your business."
"What happened? Was it Floyd's lawsuit?"
In some aspects it was. Funny that even you are aware of this, but Richard… Again this is none of your business.
"Lorelai, just give me a room."
"I don't have a room, Mom."
"You don't have a room for your mother?"
"I have a room for my mother. It's the room my mother's in."
"That's not a room. That's a practical joke."
Yes. That's exactly what it is. And I still wonder about the camera. No she wouldn't be that cruel, would she?
"No, it was a chance for you and Dad to do something special."
Again I'm ignoring her comment. Though it makes me wonder whether my previous guess was right. That she wanted us to reconcile. That or torturing us are the only options. Maybe it was something of both.
"Fine. If you won't find me another room, then I'll just sit in there until tomorrow."
I walk away from her and can't believe my eyes. There's Jason sitting in the lobby. He has listened to our whole fight.
"Jason."
"Emily."
"Do you have a room?" I ask him suspiciously.
"No, Mom, he doesn't. He just showed up here, because, apparently, it's Blake Edwards night at the Dragonfly."
I'm not going to believe you. Of course he has a room. And you told us you broke up with him. But then you're always lying to us when it comes to your boyfriends, so why should I believe you now? Finally Richard is coming. Perfect timing.
"Emily. - Jason?"
Yes isn't that a surprise?
"Richard."
"He has a room." I say.
"Are you trying to kill us?" he asks Lorelai.
"Oh, my God."
"I packed our things. I think it's time to go." Richard says to me.
One of the few things we agree on. I turn around and leave.
This whole weekend was a ridiculous idea. How could I ever had thought we would be able to solve our problems by being forced to see each other for 48 hours? We can't even survive a dinner without fighting anymore. And I am done with it. I have to get out of here as soon as possible.
I go inside the cabin. Richard didn't lie – all our things are packed. And he is coming in right behind me.
"Are you ready to leave?" he asks me.
"More than anything." I say.
I'm turning around and go to our car. Lorelai better stays inside cause I don't know what other things I would say to her when she would come outside right now. Probably some that I would regret later. Richard is coming with our luggage. He has to go back and forth several times to get everything. Finally he's done and we can drive away from this terrible place.
I finally figured out how to allow anonymous reviews – so feel free to tell me your opinion. I know there was a lot of dialogue in it that you knew before, but I couldn't bring myself to delete it, cause I think the Emily/Lorelai dialogue is hilarious. But I would like to know if you want me to include most of the dialogue that actual took place in the episodes in the next chapters.