Authors Note: Thanks Lore2, Riska and Liz for your reviews. So finally we're coming to the chapter you're all waiting for.

Chapter 25: The Roll

I think I can call the party yesterday a success. And the floor is in top-form again, so besides some broken glasses (that nearly always happens) everything worked out fine. It's late afternoon and I haven't seen Richard since he left after the party. And it's certainly not for me to go over to him (yes, I still know about the content of Hope's letter) but really he left, so if he wants to talk about the party he could come. The door-bell is ringing and since the maid has her free day, I'm opening the door myself.

"Hello Rory. How nice to see you – come in." I say cheerfully to her.

"Hi Grandma." she answers, coming in while giving me a kiss on the cheek.

"I just wanted to get my car and bring back your jewellery – thanks for giving it to me."

"Thanks for wearing it – you looked beautiful – everyone loved you – and see, nothing happened with it." I say taking it from her.

"You're right."

"So did you enjoy the party?"

"Yes - it was nice." she answers hesitantly.

"I've noticed that you were at the pool-house for quite a long time – did you know some of the young men?"

"Yes, I've met some of them at Yale."

"And – anyone whom you like in particular?"

Don't make me ask for everything.

"No, I don't think so – they're nice, but that's it."

Hmm – I don't think that's true.

"Oh – so what about Logan – have you met him before?"

"Yes."

Well that's not getting me anywhere, and perhaps it's too early and I need to give them time.

"Did you come here by bus?"

"Yes – and I'm driving back to Yale from here – I have to learn."

"Alright, but you have time for some biscuits, do you?"

"Sure."

We're talking a little about Europe; it's really nice. I wish she would come over more often – I didn't know how much I've missed her presence until now.

"Is Grandpa here?"

"Yes – I think he's at the pool-house."

"I think I'll just say a quick hello to him, before leaving."

"Sure, you should do that, he will be thrilled to see you again."

"So … you and Grandpa are still – "

I give her a warning look and she looks down.

"Sorry." I hear her mumbling. I sigh.

"I think you better go see him now. - Will you come inside again?" I ask anxiously.

"I really have to get back to Yale."

"I see."

I hate the sudden tension – and everything because of my look – she has a right to ask – at least it shouldn't upset me that much. Just when she's about to head for the lanai I call her back.

"Rory? Thanks for coming and thank you for staying a little." I smile at her.

"Anytime Grandma." she smiles back.

Then she's coming towards me again – hugging me.

"I'll see you on Friday."

"See you on Friday Sweetie."

I watch her going over to Richard.

It's Sunday and I still haven't seen Richard. I'm getting annoyed – why is it always me who has to go over to him or ask him to come? And this time will be no exception – the Dorman School Bazaar will be on Wednesday and I think it would be good for us both to attend. All our friends will be there and Friday went well so why not give it a try. What we can do at home we can do outside just as well. Sighing I'm on my way to the pool-house. I knock at the door. Richard is opening me.

"Emily? Did something happen?"

„No – I just wanted to discuss some things with you – may I come in?"

"Of course – come in."

We're getting inside – sitting opposite from each other.

"Well do you remember that the Dorman School Bazaar will be next week? All our friends will be there and we haven't missed it except if we were away. So I thought we could both attend."

"If you think that's the right thing to do, then we'll do it."

Why is he so distant? What did happen since the party? I mean I'm not imaging things, am I?

"Yes, that's what I thought – since our party went so well, I thought we could just as well attend the Bazaar together."

"I'll be there."

"Good."

"Anything else?"

I really don't know what I did.

"No."

"Good – see I have some papers to go through – a very important meeting tomorrow."

"Well I don't want to keep you from your work. Goodbye Richard."

"Goodbye Emily."

While going back to the house I wonder if the reason for his distance really was this meeting – could be. That's the only explanation I have since Friday went so well (except the ending – but he couldn't have acted everything could he?) I hate having these thoughts. I'll just have to wait for Wednesday.

It's Wednesday evening and I'm lying in my bed – I can't get over about what happened. At first there was the question, do we get there together or in our own cars? Richard wanted to take two just in case he wanted to leave earlier – fine with me. We did that before - not very often - but we did.

We were seated next to each other – of course – there are rumours, but since we haven't made the separation official that's the way it is. And it was fine with me. But then he barely talked to me. Always talking with the man next to him about his business, I couldn't hear it anymore it was annoying. And then the worst – he made me reach for the butter. He was totally ignoring me – it was standing right in front of him – he buttered his own roll (the old Richard would've offered it to me first) and then he turned to his other side to offer it to the man he was constantly talking to. And I had an unbuttered roll right in front of me. I still can't believe it. And when Bob was ready with his roll the butter was again standing in front of Richard, but nothing. I had to reach for it, so I did (with ostentation right in front of him) I know that's rude, but if he's not offering I don't care about asking – and yet he didn't notice anything. It was as if I was non-existent. Honestly it wouldn't have made any difference if I hadn't been there at all.

Well that's not true. I bet the others know for sure now, that something is wrong between us. I was so grateful for the separate cars – I didn't talk to him since. Not that there were many opportunities, but that's it. I'm not going over and Hope can tell me whatever she wants I'm not being the one making the first step. He's ignoring me – he has moved on. So it's time for me to move on also. I just have to accept that it's over.

Thursday evening. I've thought about it the whole day, and I think I've made my decision – I'm going to date. If he can have secret lunches with Pennylin I can go out, too. I know it's a little weird since the last time I dated was with Richard before we got engaged over 40 years ago, but he has moved on, so I'm moving on, too. It's not that I can't have fun, or want to be alone for the rest of my life. He had plenty of time to come to me, he choose not to come, so here goes nothing.

I know that a few men at the club would love to go out with me. The way they're looking at me, when Richard isn't around, or the way they're dancing with me even when he's around. He had to tell them more than one time to get their hands off of me. Watch where you put those hands, Lloyd – that was the first Friday after Lorelai paid us back the Chilton money, and I still have Richard's voice in my ear. And Lloyd wasn't the only one.

So lack of men isn't my problem – my problem is that I don't know how to let them know that I'm available again. I don't want a big scandal and well I just don't know what to say to them. I have to think about that.

It's Friday – the girls should be here any minute – yes I'm hearing the car. The doorbell is ringing – huh? Don't they go over to Richard first? Is he away and didn't bother to tell me – wouldn't surprise me. Lorelai is coming in.

"Where's Rory?"

"Hello mother. – Rory's at the pool-house."

"Hello Lorelai." I say rolling my eyes. "And why aren't you at the pool-house?"

"Well Rory had this idea, that we should split up – this way we have more of you- not only half an evening."

Makes no sense to me.

"Uhuh, - so she's not coming over?"

"Not tonight – I'm afraid not. Mom I swear this wasn't my idea – it was Rory's so if you have any complaints tell them to her next Friday. Then she'll be all yours."

Of course this wasn't your idea – you would do anything to avoid an evening all alone with me. But well perhaps that 's not so bad – perhaps.

"What do you want to drink?"

"White wine or whatever you have."

I guess we have to go with whatever I have – since Richard took away from me the big cart, making drinks is a mess - and of course nothing is were it is supposed to be.

"Stupid little - I can't find - ridiculous. He should have taken... " I'm muttering under my breath.

"What, Mom?"

"Oh, nothing. I'm just trying to make a proper drink, that's all."

"Sorry about the change of plans."

"Oh, please. I'm as flexible as the next person."

"See, Rory thought that since Dad's moved out to the pool house, we're not getting enough time with either of you, so –"

I'm not paying attention to her – where on earth is the ice?

"I guess I could use the ice in the freezer, though it's probably old. You know what they say – a little notice ensures fresh ice."

"I'm sorry, who says that?"

"We'll just have to have scotch neat."

"Super."

"I'd offer you wine, but all the wine I have has to breathe."

"And that requires some notice."

And Richard took always care of that – well I have to move on. I'm going over to her with our drinks sitting down next to her. - She's staring at me.

"What are you looking at?" I demand.

"Nothing. It's just - isn't - isn't this weird to you?"

"What?"

"Sitting next to each other?"

Please Lorelai what are you - four?

"Would you like me to move?"

"No, it's fine. It's just... close."

You were in me for nine month – that was close.

"Will you explain to me again why we are doing this?"

Cause honestly I still haven't understood it completely.

"I have no idea because you usually sit over there."

"I'm talking about Rory being in the pool house, Lorelai."

And you know that, so don't play games with your mother.

"Rory just thought we should split up tonight, get in some quality... couch time."

"It seems very silly. We had a perfectly good system worked out. I don't know why we changed it."

And I hate that I hadn't advanced notice of this – let alone that I wasn't asked, if whether or not I would be okay with it.

"Mmm. - So, Mom, do you think you and Dad are getting back together?"

That came out of the blue.

"Absolutely not."

"Okay, got any peanuts?"

And why do you ask, when you're not interested anyway.

"Your father has proven to me once and for all he's moved on with his life."

"You don't think the moving on with his life would have actually included moving?"

"No."

"Okay."

Since you're asking and are so interested in this I might just as well tell you.

"We attended the Dorman School Bazaar last week. It was a big, formal gathering. All our friends were there. And at dinner, he made me reach for the butter."

Actually it's good to finally be able to tell this to someone.

"What?"

"It was sitting right there in front of him, and yet he didn't offer me the dish. He buttered his own roll, offered the dish to the man next to him, and that was it."

And yes, I still can't get over it.

"And that's why you think he's moved on?"

She's not getting it.

"It was a total disregard for my needs. I might as well not have had a roll in front of me at all." I add upset.

"Well, Mom, I'm sorry."

"It's very upsetting. But at some point, you have to face the facts, and the facts are he's moved on, and therefore, I should move on also."

"Absolutely. Move on dot org."

Huh?I hate those weird references. But well since she knows everything anyway, I can just as well ask for her advice – I mean she has a lot of dating experience and I'm desperate so why not give it a try – I know she'll make jokes, but whatever – I'm desperate.

"I think it's time for me to date."

"Oh, my God!" she exclaims, nearly choking her drink.

"I want to go on a date." What's so shocking about that? You shouldn't be the one upholding moral standards.

"With... a man?"

"No, a weasel. Of course with a man!"I say angrily.

"I'm not hearing this." she says – trying to cover her ears – childish.

"Why shouldn't I date? I'm still a viable commodity."

"I need a paper towel and a valium, please."

I figure out the best thing to deal with it is again ignoring her childish behaviour.

"There are plenty of men at the club who, in the past, have made their interests in me known. I just need to figure out how to reciprocate their feelings. - You have a lot of experience with men. How do you let them know that you're available?"

There I did it – I asked her.

"Well, one of those bench ads usually does the trick."

Please.

"Lorelai, stop it. I need help here. It's been years since I did this, and I don't remember the proper procedure. Now, take me through this step by step. You see a man - you walk up to him - and you say..."

"Hello."

"Is that too forward?"

"No, it's the appropriate way to indicate you're open to a social engagement. Unless, however, you are approaching a weasel. Then I believe the proper signal is just to offer him your hindquarters."

It was a mistake to ask her advice – she can't take one thing serious – and this is not a joking matter.

"Well thanks a lot for your help." I say standing up. "Gina?"

"Mom, I…"

"What Lorelai, you've made it clear that all of this is a joke to you. Fine. – Gina?" I yell.

"Yes ma'am."

"How long until dinner is ready?"

"15 min. ma'am."

"Well hurry."

"Yes ma'am."

"Mom, please. It's just weird – I mean I would've never expected this and – I'm sorry."

Well you should be. I'm looking at her. She looks serious.

„So when I'm asking you again, you'll honestly try to help me?"

„I don't know, I mean what do you expect me to say – don't you understand that this is weird?"

Yes I do – I should've never asked you this. It's not what we do.

Dinner is awkward. We try to find safe topics like her Inn or the DAR, but mostly it's very silent. It's a pity that I can't enjoy the first dinner with my daughter alone for years – neither can she – not that she's normally enjoying my dinners.

When she's about to say goodbye she turns to me.

"And you're sure you wanna start dating?"

"Yes. As I've already told you, your father has moved on and therefore –"

"- you'll move on also. Got it. – Well just go to the man you want and start a normal conversation. Flirt a little, you know eyes and everything – there's not much to explain – I'm sure you'll know what to do." she says, smiling a little unsure.

"Thank you Lorelai."

Perhaps it wasn't a mistake after all to ask her. She nods and goes outside. Her last sentence calmed me down a little. Maybe she's right and it isn't that difficult – that I'll just know what to do. Well we'll see.

Okay – I know what you really wanted to read will happen in the next chapter – and it's not easy to write – so please give me reviews – they motivate me.