A/N: This chapter is dedicated to Trickster's Queen of War since I know she's a major SHEYLA fan.

A/N: Chapter 18 Beta'd by Angw and Trickster's Queen of War.

A/N: This chapter is very different from the rest... just a warning.

Lieutenant Laura Cadman, United States Marine Corps

I'm not good with goodbyes. I think they hurt way too much, but I do them anyway. I step into the infirmary, Carson looks up from his desk. I know that he knows exactly why I'm here. I know it'll hurt him, but I can't leave without saying goodbye.

He crosses the space between us and engulfs me in a hug. "Don't say it love." He says, placing a finger to my lips.

"Carson, I have to." I plead in response.

"I know what you're doing. I know it's the best chance for everyone here. I just don't want to lose yah."

"Carson, these last few weeks have been something out of a dream." I can't meet his eyes. "I just wanted you to know that before... well if anything happens to me."

He forces me to look at him, a hand pushing my chin up. "Love, you do what you have to, but you come home when it's all said and done. Y'hear?"

"I promise Carson." I kiss him for what feels like the last time. It's time to get ready. With one last look at him, I step out of the infirmary.

I can't help but feel I'm leaving the best part of myself behind. Carson will be worried sick about me. I hate putting him through this. I hate the wraith for making me put him through this. Hopefully this will be the last time I've got to do anything like this.

Ronon Dex

I've gotten lucky recently. I happened to run into Sheppard on the planet and I came back to Atlantis just in time. For once in my life, I feel like I've got something worthwhile to fight for. This time it's not Teyla, at least not in that way. I'm fighting so we all have a future.

I'm standing near the entrance to the balcony adjacent to the control room. I can see Sheppard and Teyla together on the balcony, in each others arms. They're just standing there, holding each other. For my part, I'm just standing here too.

The more I think about it, the more I realize how wrong I was to interfere. I knew how Teyla felt about Sheppard. Sheppard may not always be as physically strong as I am, but he's the strongest leader I've ever met. He doesn't order us into situations unless he's coming too.

He's not like Kell. For too long I have compared Sheppard to Kell. I should've realized that I'd lost any hope for more with Teyla when I abused her friendship. The memory of her knife against my throat finally burns the way it should. I should've thought about her before I tried to force my way into her life.

Sheppard's won Teyla's heart and I believe he had won it a long time ago. Long before I ever came to Atlantis. It's only taken this long for them to admit that they have had these feelings for each other.

I know Teyla's been exiled from her people because of her feelings for Sheppard, but I know it's my fault. I interfered. I beat Sheppard down. If I'd just been a real friend, I would've been happy for her. It's taken me this long to swallow my pride.

I owe them both an apology. I take a deep breath and step out onto the balcony. Teyla instinctively backs away from Sheppard. Sheppard relaxes, letting her back away. That's another thing I couldn't have done. I wouldn't have been able to let go like that.

I glance nervously at them both. I expect anger. All I find is quiet acknowledgment from both of them. "I owe both of you an apology."

Sheppard nods, leaning against the rail. "Okay." That's all he says, one simple word.

I'm left for a bit of a shock. I stumble over what to say. "First off, Teyla... I can't apologize enough for abusing your friendship. That's something I don't deserve, yet you've given it back."

Teyla doesn't respond, but I can see something disappear in her eyes, maybe some sort of burden she's been carrying with her.

I'm not deserving of friends like this. I shift my feet uncomfortably. "Teyla, I apologize for interfering in what should've been you're decision. I finally feel terrible for ruining your connection to your people simply because I couldn't get over my jealousy of Sheppard."

I caught Sheppard raise an eyebrow and suppress a grin. Obviously he knew exactly what I was talking about. I'm suddenly left with all kinds of questions. Did Sheppard think he was losing her to me? Is that why he acted when he did? Why did Teyla tell him about her problems with her people? Why not me? Was it because of what I did?

I don't have time to answer my own questions. I turn to Sheppard. I'm not deserving of this man's forgiveness. Yet I know he's already forgiven me before I even say my apology. "Sheppard, I apologize for interfering in what must be the best thing that's ever happened to you. I apologize for beating you into the ground too. I can't ask for your forgiveness."

"But you know I've already given it." Sheppard meets my gaze. I suddenly realize why he accepted me. Sheppard doesn't see people from the Pegasus galaxy as different. He judges everyone equally. Maybe this is because of how he feels for Teyla or maybe it's just how he is. Either way I don't deserve it.

I'm overwhelmed. Both of them have forgiven me. Both of them are welcoming me back. I feel myself turning red and hastily get off the balcony. This is what I lost when I was on the run from the wraith. I lost the ability to forgive. For so long I lived with hate. I feel as if something has changed in me.

Doctor Elizabeth Weir, Atlantis Expedition Commander

Once upon a time I would've felt like I was sending a team to their deaths, but in reality I've sent them to save us all. It's something I've learned from being around John Sheppard. He has never left anyone behind, and I don't doubt he will now.

My first stop is Aiden's quarters. I thought he was lost. Thankfully John managed to bring him home. Home is Atlantis. It is to all of us. I knock on the door.

"Come in." Aiden replies.

I step in. Aiden is lying on his bed, staring at the ceiling. "I hope I'm not interrupting anything."

"No mam." Aiden's old personality has resurfaced just as it was. The only reminder of what happened to him is his missing left eye and the scare that comes with it.

"I'm glad you're back with us Lieutenant. I wanted to wish you good luck."

"With John and Teyla leading it, we're in great shape." Aiden smiled. "So how are you dealing with the two of them being together."
I was taken aback. "I don't think it's any of my business."

"Oh come on. Don't be a spoilsport. Personally, I say it's about time. They've had the hots for each other since the day they met."
"On Athos?"

"Yeah. You should've seen Colonel Sheppard's reaction when he first saw her. It's like watching a teenage guy see the girl of his dreams."

"There was always something special about the two of them."
"That's what makes seeing them together the best thing ever." Aiden paused, realizing that I was uncomfortable with the conversation. "Sorry mam. I've waited for too long to see this happen. It's really exciting."

I forced a smile. "Just be careful." I stood and left the room. My next stop was John and Teyla themselves.

I walked down the halls in a daze. There was a time when I thought I felt something for John. I realized that it wasn't what I thought. At the time, that was good. I thought I still had Simon back on Earth. I really didn't have Simon though.

I was happy for both of them. They were happy, and they really were a good couple. I should know, I performed the marriage. I stop in front of their quarters, it is still a bit odd to be stopping here for them. This room used to house an Athosian family.

I guess by all intents and purposes it does now too. Teyla is an Athosian, even if she's exiled from her family. I'm not sure if the two of them plan to have children, but I know the room was designed for it. I knock.

"Come in." John's voice responds.

I enter. John and Teyla are on the balcony. I step up to them. They're not even holding hands, they're just leaning against the railing. "I've been going around and wishing luck to everyone."

John raised an eyebrow and turned to face me. "Are you sure?"

I find myself smiling. "I've got to make sure you behave John."

Teyla grins mischievously. "Are you so worried about just John?"

Now I laugh. This is why they're such a great couple. "You're a perfect match for him Teyla. But I am serious about wishing you good luck."

"Thanks Elizabeth." John replied. Teyla nods. "We will be returning, and then we won't have to worry about the wraith anymore."

"Let's just hope we don't find anymore enemies after this."
"There are the Genii." Teyla said.

"And who knows how many people I've gotten mad at us." John finished.

"One at a time John." I turn. "Make sure you're ready. They'll be here soon." I walked from the room. I hope I haven't sent them to their deaths.

Teyla Emmagen Sheppard

I know we have only a few more hours before we must prepare for the mission, yet I want every hour to last forever. It's just John and I, alone. We haven't said many words in this last hour. I've simply leaned against him the entire time.

He has one arm around my shoulder. Every once and awhile he gives it a brief squeeze. He's worried about me, I can see it in his eyes. Yet I also know that he knows, that I will not be left behind on this mission. He knows I am needed as much as he is.

These last few days have been truly troubling. I've gone from being the leader of my people and the eye of both Ronon and John's affection, to being caught between the two, to finally being once again close to both of them. It's different though, I'm married to John, Ronon finally respects that.

I'm truly grateful he decided to come back. I do not wish to lose Ronon as a friend. It was the hardest thing to watch him defeat John so mercilessly in the fight and try and claim me. It was humiliating. I felt betrayed again.

Yet I still didn't want to lose him as a friend. Atlantis needs him. So do I, and in truth I believe John does to. We've come to rely on him. It's a unique position to be in.

Elizabeth has been by to wish us luck, though I could see it directed at John. She cares for him, and maybe even loves him. She knows that she can't have him though. She'll always have her friendship and the mutual respect they share, and I believe that she truly treasures it.

At the edge of my thoughts, suppressed for now, I can feel the wraith calling for me. The love I feel from John helps me to find the strength to push it back, but it's growing stronger as the wraith get closer.

John squeezes my shoulder and pulls me into a gentle embrace, as if reading my thoughts. I am easily able to push the wraith back. I feel that I have the strength to carry on. I know I have the strength. I'm ready, and I know everyone else is too. Soon we'll be fighting on a wraith hive ship. Soon, we'll have a chance to end this war.

A/N: I know it's short, but the next chapter or chapters should more than make up for it.