The Importance of the Night and Being Blind

Part Three

By Katsuya Kaiba

Is it really so strange?

My thoughts ran free as I slowly walked to school on Monday morning, after surviving what turned out to be a very dull weekend. I spent most of the time in bed, avoiding the irresistible temptation of sleep and all the while knowing that my efforts would be in vain. Each time that I fell into dreaming was the same, and the dream never changed or altered itself in any way. Always Seto and I together, and my eyes were always shielded from the sight of us.

I felt as though my ability to see had been taken for granted. It's always so easy to see things for how they truly are, and even though I still had my eyesight I had lost something that I hadn't known was important, or even that it existed. My ability to see myself, for what I really was and the things that I truly wanted…that was gone. I did remember what Seto had told me when I asked him about the darkness. And I knew that he had been right. This thing inside of me was real, it was my true feeling and I was the one who felt it, me and no other. It didn't really matter that Seto had been the one to draw it out. It was still there, had been there for an unfathomable amount of time, unbeknownst to me.

Now, a particular definition of this 'thing' that was mine I did not have. The only things that I had to go by were the manifestations that I could identify as a result of feeling this way. The dreams…yeah, I could safely say that those were definitely a result of this newly discovered and much repressed Joey Wheeler. Another dead giveaway was my poor defensive tactics that made themselves known whenever Seto was within a five-mile radius. I almost tripped over my own feet at the memory of each opportunity I'd had to shove him off, push him away, or even just run blindly away from Seto, all resulting in nothing except a complete and illogical submission beneath his will.

Now that I thought about it, deeply and without interruption, I saw that every single thing that had changed about me had only changed due to something that involved Seto. Was this his fault?

No. That just wasn't it. But was it the fault of the two of us, together? Maybe. Or perhaps thinking of the situation as a 'fault' was the real issue. Maybe it was just something that happened to us. It certainly wasn't happening to me alone, and judging from the way that Seto had been acting recently, I thought that it was safe to say that he had been feeling somewhat different than he had been before all of this had happened. Before that day, last Wednesday…

What if there had been no Seto?

That thought nearly stopped me in my tracks, even though I knew that I would already be late to school as it was. Would this have happened to me if it had been anyone else? I considered that option for the longest time, but ultimately came to the conclusion that it didn't matter. It didn't matter because I didn't care about anyone else the way that I did for Seto. Not to say that I had suddenly and without warning fallen in love with him or anything. I hadn't, not at all, but I was willing to admit that there was a place for him in my mind that had not previously existed. And that was all. No deep feelings of tenderness or affection, just a small and well-placed interest that singled him out just a bit further than I did for anyone else.

I had never dreamt about anyone in that way. I supposed that I owed him a little something for the thought.

So, then, was it really so strange? Was I as sick as I had imagined? Maybe we both were. The idea of that made me smile, and I looked up from the sidewalk and grinned at nothing in particular, except the solitary thought that if I was going down, at least I was taking someone along with me.

I wasn't as late to school as I had thought I would be, and I arrived about five minutes after classes had begun. I didn't hurry, not wanting to add another second to the sentence that I had to serve listening to the nonsense that I mostly didn't understand, anyway. Turning the corner at the end of the hallway and reaching the door that I was supposed to be on the other side of, I was met with a very surprising sight.

Seto Kaiba, standing impatiently in front of the door and tapping his foot, waiting for something, or…someone. I prayed that it wasn't me. He saw me just seconds after I saw him, and his eyebrows furrowed even deeper at my arrival.

"Took you long enough."

I stood still in front of him, wondering what it was that I was meant to have done.

"To do what? Why aren't you in class?"

Seto crossed his arms over his chest and lost his impatient glare, settling instead for an expression devoid of meaning and staring at me blankly.

"Ensuring your attendance. You need to come to school more often."

I gave him a sort of half smile that conveyed my shocked amusement at his claim.

"Oh, yeah? What were you gonna do if I hadn't shown up?"

"I would have…ensured your attendance." He returned my smile, although the meaning behind it was drastically different than my own. I felt my eyes widen as I considered all of the possible implications of his statement.

"Well…what if I had just stayed home today?"

He laughed aloud this time, not unlike the way he did when he was challenged by a hopeful novice, looking for a chance to dethrone the world champion of gaming.

"Don't be ridiculous. I know where you live. I already told you that. Go ahead and try me. Stay home tomorrow."

I did not, under any circumstances, want to try Seto Kaiba. I looked past him at the door of the classroom and remembered where we were supposed to be.

"Okay…we should probably go to class now."

He lost his amused expression and thought for a moment, considering the option.

"Alright."

He turned and opened the door, and the two of us walked inside. Nothing could have prepared me for the looks on everyone's faces when we walked inside, both Seto and I at once and neither one of us attempting to destroy the other, but rather entering as though we'd come to school together. A hushed silence descended over the classroom but I ignored it and took my seat, smiling at my friends and opening my backpack. It was already shaping up to be quite a day.

"What's Kaiba doing?"

I heard Yuugi's question and without looking at my friend my eyes began immediately scanning the cafeteria. I hadn't seen Seto since the lunch hour began, and I had almost been able to forget about the whole situation, lost in the mindless chatter that I shared with my friends. I saw him finally, in the far corner table that he always sat at alone. It would have been kind of sad in a way, if my friends hadn't made countless attempts to try and coax him into a more sociable attitude. He would have none of it, preferring to work away the entire hour at his laptop, oblivious to the world.

It was safe to say that we had given up on trying to integrate Seto Kaiba into Society as a whole.

"I think he's lost it."

Seto was watching me. His computer was on the table in front of him, but it was closed and his attention was far from the tabletop. As soon as I caught sight of him our eyes met, and I realized that his line of sight had been on me for awhile…maybe the entire time I had been sitting here. A sharp shiver ran through my spine at the idea. He was starting to really creep me out, even more than he usually did. I sank into my chair and laid low, hoping that he might lose interest or busy himself with something else.

"Should we go and talk to him?"

I sat up in a panic and waved my hands in front of me in a very negative gesture.

"NO!…I mean…come on, Yuugi…Kaiba doesn't wanna talk to us. How many times have we tried to get him to come over here? It ain't worth it, just forget about him."

Yuugi eyes my reaction with a raised eyebrow, as did everyone else at the table, but he nodded and went back to eating his lunch. That had been close. There was no way I was going to be able to keep this thing of mine a secret if Seto suddenly decided to join forces with the rest of the group. But he would never do a thing like that…would he? He was probably just keeping an eye on me, something I had recently come to accept as my unavoidable fate.

I couldn't let him come over to our table, nor could I let my friends go to him. They had to be apart at all times, which had been miraculously easy until just a few days ago. Now that I had a reason to keep them apart, the task grew to nearly impossible proportions. But Seto was loud and spoke however he felt was necessary, and he was ashamed of nothing and hid even less. There wasn't a doubt in my mind that he would say something to me or about me that would give everything away. And that I could not afford. There wasn't any way that I was going to let my friends know what had become of me. I wasn't exactly sure how they would react, but I knew that I did not want to find out. Perhaps it was drastic of me, but the situation was slowly spiraling out of my control, and I at least wanted to sort out the way that I felt before I started broadcasting my feelings to everyone around me.

"He's still staring at us…actually, Joey, I think he's staring at you."

I felt the blood draining slowly out of my face as I turned once again to look at Seto. We weren't so far apart that it wasn't obvious to say who he was staring at. When I was sure that he could see my face I glared at him, frowning in disapproval. He returned my expression with a small smile, daring me to do something about it. I turned my head back to my own table and ate my lunch, utterly defeated.

"He's just trying to fuck with me. Don't pay him any attention."

What exactly was he trying to accomplish? I was worried about what Seto might be up to, and I was unnaturally silent for the remainder of the hour, anticipating the worst. Even after Seto packed up and left a few minutes after I had last looked at him, the thought of him was still very near. I wondered what he might try next, and what it was all going to eventually lead up to. With Seto, there was no telling. But what truly scared me was the memory of Seto and what he was willing to do in order to take something that he wanted. I had known Seto for at least two years now, and during that time I had witnessed his destructive and forceful habit of stopping at absolutely nothing to achieve what he desired numerous times, and to think that I might be that new and seductive something was a thought that terrified me on all existing levels. He was intelligent, calculating, and relentless, taking drastic and even unnecessary measures to attain what most would consider the unattainable.

But not Seto. Nothing was impossible, or even unlikely, as far as he was concerned. I wasn't sure that I was going to be able to sleep that night. Not that it mattered, since I hadn't been sleeping well for what seemed like years, but now there was a new and more threatening reason to lie awake. Seto knew where I lived. Or so he professed, and I really did not want to find out if he was lying or not.

I sighed wistfully, accepting my fate and resolving to wait quietly to see what Seto might do next. Whatever it would be, there wasn't a thing I could do to put a stop to it.

As soon as the final bell rang I was out of my seat and halfway through the door. I couldn't wait to get out of there, away from the burden of learning and Seto Kaiba. Unfortunately, I walked right out of one and into the other, and I blinked at the sight of Seto right in front of the school, leaning on the side of his car and looking impatient as always. He was still at least twenty feet or so away, and I seriously considered the option of turning around and walking right back into the school. I knew that he wouldn't wait around for long, but it was the idea of what he might do instead of waiting that troubled me. I approached him apprehensively and stopped when he was within an arms reach.

Not wanting to assume anything, I acted as though I didn't know what he was waiting for.

"Um…what are you still doing here? I thought you were the only person able to get out of this place faster than me."

Seto only snickered at my question and stood upright.

"Well, I haven't got all day. Get in."

Having said that, Seto proceeded to get inside the car himself, opening the back door and stepping inside. He sat in the farthest seat from the door and watched me expectantly, and when I made no move to follow him he frowned and ducked his head, glaring at me from inside the car.

"Heel, puppy dog. Or are you afraid of cars?"

What a jackass. I had half a mind to walk away and leave him there, and I almost did, but the thought of what might have befallen me in the following minutes, days, years…it gave me a little perspective. I begrudgingly tossed my backpack through the open door and sat beside him. The moment I shut the door the car began to move. I was vaguely curious as to who was driving the car, and if they, too, knew where I lived. I certainly wouldn't have been surprised. I glanced over at Seto from the corner of my eye and found that he was staring straight ahead, his eyes devoid of intent or emotion. I wondered if it would be out of place for me to say anything, but after sitting in complete silence for a minute or two I couldn't help myself. I wanted to know if I was supposed to be scared or not.

"Where are we going?"

Seto's response was quick.

"Home."

I thought about that for a moment before speaking again.

"Okay…my home or yours?"

"Yours."

I got the distinct impression that the matter wasn't up for discussion, so I let it alone and tried another approach.

"You wanna let me in on the big secret?"

"…What?"

"Well, for starters…I could have taken the bus. But for some reason that only you know, I'm getting a ride. Anything you wanna tell me?"

"No."

I looked at Seto directly, frustrated with his inability to give out information. He hadn't been exactly talkative the last few times we had spoken, but the forced tone of his voice made me feel as though I was asking him questions that I already had the answers to. Perhaps I did, but Seto didn't know that.

"Well…thank you. I'd rather not take the bus, but-"

"I know."

I didn't speak at first, wondering what he meant by that. I had been going to say that I had been having a bit of trouble as of late when it came to getting from the bus stop to my house safely, but no one, not even Yuugi knew what was happening. I had promised Yuugi that I wouldn't fight anymore, and even though I was never the one to start anything, playing the defensive got old very quickly. But now, I was curious as to just how much he knew.

"Kaiba…what do you mean, 'you know'?"

Seto never looked in my direction as he spoke to me, although I knew that he could feel my eyes on him.

"Rintama."

So he did know. My mind briefly touched on the subject of how he could have possibly known something like that, but it just as quickly skittered away at the possible answers. I really wanted to believe that Seto was not as crazy as he seemed to be. But crazy or not, he was right. Hirutani and the rest of the Rintama boys had it out for me in a big way, and while I had thought that I had seen the last of them some time ago, a few weeks back one of the newer boys had seen me walking home and immediately ran back to Hirutani with the location of my new neighborhood. Needless to say, it wasn't long before they paid me a visit, then another, and another, until I was out of ideas and seriously considering taking a later bus home. Hirutani wasn't around very often, but my money was on the fact that ever since I had left, the entire gang was slowly falling apart, which would explain why Hirutani was so desperate to have me back. We had been so close, though…every time I had to fight him off it hurt somewhere inside of me, regardless of what had happened between us since those old days. He was, and always would be, my very first best friend.

But somehow, Seto knew at least some of that, and I had no idea how.

"I don't think I wanna know how you found that out."

A small smile turned his mouth slightly and it was barely even noticeable. Only because I was staring at him directly was I able to see it.

"No…probably not."

"Well, do me a favor and don't tell anyone about it. In fact, don't talk to anyone that I know. I don't want them thinking that something's happening between us."

"Is it?"

Of all the loaded questions I had ever been asked, this was by far the most explosive. And anyway, Seto was the one who was following me around and acting so strangely, as though I were something that he was suddenly responsible for. I wasn't sure how to answer the question correctly, since most of it was theoretical and open to interpretation in the first place. I knew that there was something that was hiding between the two of us, but it was still in the shadows and remained to be seen.

"I…I don't know. I don't know much of anything anymore. But you…you're the one who's acting all weird, so you tell me. And what the hell was up with you earlier today?"

For the first time since I got into his car, Seto turned to look me in the eye. His expression was a thoroughly confused one.

"When?"

"At lunch. Everyone thought that you were staring at me."

"I was." His expression turned into a slightly amused grin, still only barely there and hidden beneath the constant indifference that was permanently set into his features.

"Well, yeah, obviously, but do you have to be so weird about it?"

"And what was it that you found to be 'weird'?"

I couldn't believe that he was asking me this. Had it escaped him that it wasn't exactly discreet to simply stare at someone, regardless of their surroundings? I almost didn't answer him, but I thought that maybe Seto might not understand what it meant to be discreet in the first place. I had certainly never seen him act that way, and I wondered if he even knew what he was supposed to do in situations such as these.

"Look…I don't know exactly what it is that you're up to, but you can't just…stare at someone for half an hour and not look completely insane."

Seto watched me as I spoke, frowning, as if trying to wrap his mind around what I was telling him.

"Why should I care?"

"Because…you should!" I was beyond frustrated at that point. Just because he didn't care about what anyone else thought didn't mean that I should have to feel the same. "I care! All of my friends were about to go and see why you were doing that, and I had to convince them not to. Don't you understand? I don't want them to know!"

"You don't want them to know what?" Seto's eyes were on mine and I couldn't pull away from his gaze. His hold was far too strong, and I stared at him in silence like that for a long time. The car rolled to a halt, and I looked away for a moment and realized that I was home.

"Never mind." Seto's voice was small and it lacked the forceful authority that it normally had. It wasn't sad or empty, but it was quiet and unsure, as though he felt that he had done something he shouldn't have. I felt bad, although I didn't think that I had done anything wrong. I simply had no answers for him. I wasn't the one in control of this situation, he was, and if there were any answers at all, he already had them. I grabbed my bag and reached for the handle on the door, but something in the back of my mind told me not to leave the situation as it was. I turned back and faced him fully, not sure of what it was that I had to say, but knowing that I needed to say something before I left, if only for my own peace of mind.

"Look…I'm sorry abou-"

Whatever I had meant to say was lost when Seto kissed me, right there in the car. That was probably the very last thing that I had expected from him, and when I felt his lips on mine I instinctively pulled back, too shocked to think clearly. But Seto was too quick and when he felt my reaction his hand gripped my shoulder and he pulled me back into the kiss, and that time I did not back away. I wasn't sure if I was going to regret it later, but I didn't really care at the moment, because Seto Kaiba had never truly kissed me before, not like this, and I rather liked the feeling it gave me. A slightly airy sensation began to flutter and curl in the pit of my stomach, and I might have smiled against his lips had I been that daring. One of my hands found it's way up to his chest and I wound it into his shirt, pulling him closer. He complied, and in the same moment I felt one of his own hands slide from my shoulder where he had grabbed me before and it trailed slowly down my back, following the path on my spine and the feeling made me both nervous and excited in the same second.

He backed off after a few more moments and watched me closely, as though studying my reaction. I felt sort of like I was some kind of experiment, always under close examination and subjected to randomized tests, all towards a purpose that I had no clue as to what it might be. Still, I was dizzy in a way, a way that had nothing to do with balance. My thoughts were spinning and I felt lightheaded, and before he could ay or do anything else, I opened the car door and stepped outside. Leaning into the interior and grabbing my backpack, I snuck one last glance at Seto before shutting the door and walking up the driveway to my house. I never looked back, and after a moment I heard the car drive away, leaving me alone with my strangely buzzing thoughts.

No…it really hadn't been so strange. This feeling, whatever it might be…it wasn't so bad.

That's hot...and a little squishy. I hope that it was enough squishiness for you all, because I don't think that the rest of the story is 'cute' by any standards. Well...it's sexy, though. That's fair, isn't it? This chapter didn't have any of the limey goodness in it, and I do apologize for that, but rest assured, the lemon is like, eight pages. 10 font. I hope that it will not dissapoint. It's comin', it's comin', just give them some time to angst a little more first.