Author's Note: Hehhe once again thanks for all the reviews! Yeah I already had the last chapter written which is why it went up so quickly(sneaky me). Anyways thanks once again!
Disclaimer: I do not own Yugioh, the characters, Neopets or any of the stores/restaurants mentioned so don't sue me:)
Gimme A Flap Dance Baby!
"Eww this is a guy!" said the little brown haired boy as he poked Amelda in the chest "Yuck he's wearing a shirt made for a lady though! Why?".
"He looks like he's got boobies" said the blonde haired boy as he poked Amelda in the stomach "Maybe that's why he wears a ladies shirt". "Why would anyone want to look like him?" asked the redheaded boy as he poked Amelda in the stomach as well "He's creepy". At that moment the other two boys looked at Amelda and then at their friend before bursting into giggles. "What's so funny?" asked the redheaded boy as he looked straight at them "Why are you laughing?". "Cause" snickered the brown haired boy as he pointed to Amelda "You're gonna look just like him when you grow up!". "No I'm not!" shouted the redheaded boy "I'm not gonna look like him!". "Yes you are" said the blonde haired boy "You already kinda look like him". What the boys never suspected was that Amelda was awake at that point but he was in too much pain to even open his eyes. They failed to notice when he opened his eyes since they were too busy teasing their friend.
"What happened?" thought Amelda as he slowly sat up "I feel like I got hit by a truck...". He then noticed the two boys teasing the poor redheaded boy who was about to burst into tears. "I do not look like him!" cried the redheaded boy at the top of his lungs "I'm not that girly looking!". "Yes you do!" said the blonde haired boy as he looked at him "You're probably gonna dress like him!". "Yeah and you're gonna carry a purse too!" said the brown haired boy "And you're gonna put makeup on!". At that moment the two boys felt someone tap them on the back and they turned around to find themselves face to face with Amelda(who still couldn't stand up).
"Where the Hell are they?" growled a very frustrated Dartz as he stopped to look at a map of the mall "Why does this blasted mall have so many floors?".
Dartz hadn't really looked around the mall since he was just too damn lazy at that point, so he decided to do the next best thing. "Excuse me" said Dartz as he stopped a random person walking by and showed them a picture of Raphael "Have you seen this person?". "Oh I just saw him awhile ago" said Serenity as she looked at the picture "He was with this brown haired girl over at the Cinnabon stand!". Serenity was a cute and sickenly sweet girl looking girl but when Dartz looked at her hands he was shocked. "What on Earth is a that?" said Dartz when he noticed Serenity was holding a gigantic cinnamon roll in her hands "Some sort of Neopet?". "Yeah..." said Serenity in a sarcastic tone of voice as she looked at Dartz "It's a Bunbun". "Hmm never heard of that one" said Dartz as he began to walk towards the Cinnabon stand.
A few minutes later though Dartz realized that a Cinnabon was in reality nothing more than a gigantic cinnamon roll(and not a Neopet). "That blasted girl tricked me!" muttered Dartz as he looked around "Ah...but it seems I found what I was looking for". "Mmm I love these things" said Varon as he licked the icing off of his Cinnabon before taking a huge bite out of it "I think I'll get another one after this". Raphael and Varon had decided to take a snack break so they bought some Cinnabons and sat down on a nearby bench to eat them. "You've already had six of them" said Raphael who was still struggling to eat one "How can you eat so many?". "I'm just hungry" said Varon who had somehow managed to swallow the thing whole "Besides I'm still growing and I need lots of food".
"Disgusting glutton" said Dartz as he pulled out his camcorder and began to film the two of them "Hmm...I think the time has arrived for the ultimate punishment".
So as Varon stood up to go buy yet another sugary sweet Cinnabon, Dartz quickly snapped his fingers and right on cue another vortex appeared. "Should I get a regular Cinnabon?" thought Varon "Or should I get one with peac-". Before Varon knew what was happening he was spinning around and round in the vortex and screaming for help. "AHHHHHHHHHHH!" screamed Varon as he was spun round and round "I'M GONNA HURL!". "Varon?" said Raphael as he suddenly looked around and realized that Varon wasn't on the bench and he wasn't at the Cinnabon stand "Where did he go?". "And Raphael just noticed that Varon is gone" said Dartz with his camcorder in one hand and a Cinnabon in the other "But Varon is in a better place now...a much better place". He then gave an evil laugh and took a huge bite of his treat.
"Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you!" sang all of the people in the restaurant at the top of their lungs "Happy birthday Bandit Keith! Happy birthday to you!".
At that moment everyone cheered and Bandit Keith blew out the candles on his cake. "So what'd wish for boss?" said Bonez as he looked over at Bandit Keith "Some new duel monsters cards?". It was Bandit Keith's birthday and since he didn't really have any friends he had no choice but to pay Bonez, Sid, and Zygor to hang out with him for the day. "What do you think I am? Ten?" spat out Bandit Keith as he looked down at Bonez "I didn't wish for Duel Monsters cards! I wish for-"
SPLAT!
At that moment Bandit Keith and everyone in the surrounding area were sprayed with cake and frosting. "Where am I?" said Varon as he quickly sat up but when he looked down he just screamed "WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?". Varon had not only landed on a cake, but he was now wearing super tight(and super short) orange shorts and a tanktop that read "Hooters" on it. "I never wanted to get into a Hooter girl's pants this way!" shouted Varon as he jumped off the table "That sick old bastard Dartz is behind this! I know it!". "YOU CRUSHED MY BIRTHDAY CAKE!" shouted Bandit Keith as he wiped the cake and frosting off his face "YOU'RE GONNA PAY FOR THAT!". "Hey it was an accident!" said Varon as he wiped some of the frosting off of his shorts "Besides this cake tastes so bad that I did you a favor!". Bandit Keith looked really pissed off since someone had ruined his birthday, but the moment he actually got a good look at Varon then it all changed.
"I know just how you can repay me baby" said Bandit Keith as he began to wipe the frosting off of his sunglasses "You can gimme a flap dance!"
"A WHAT?" screamed Varon at the top of his lungs "Wait...what's a flap dance?". Varon had been to Hooters lots of times before, but even then he had never heard of a "flap dance". "Outta my way newbie!" said a waitress as she walked over and pushed Varon out of the way "I'll show you how it's done!". She then blew a whistle really loud and at that moment some bad dance music started blasting really loud on the overhead speakers and the lights dimmed. "What the Hell is going on?" said Varon as he looked around in total confusion "I don't like the looks of this!". "Hoot hoot!" suddenly yelled someone off in the corner of the restaurant and a spotlight shone down on them. Varon's jaw just dropped from shock when he saw someone dressed from head to toe in a big tacky owl costume. Suddenly the giant owl ran over to Bandit Keith and began to dance like crazy while flapping his/her/its arms.
"Hoot! Hoot!" cooed the giant owl in a seductive voice "Hoot! Hoot! Hoot!"
"Wait!" shouted Bandit Keith as the giant owl danced around him flapping its wings and shaking it's tail feathers "What the Hell is this? I don't want this!". "I dunno..." said Bonez "But I kinda think it's sexy". Less then a second later he was on ground after Bandit Keith pounded his fist onto his head. "Well you said you wanted a flap dance for your birthday right?" said the waitress who had blown the whistle "And that's exactly what we're giving you". "Not from this thing!" screamed Bandit Keith as he jumped out of his chair and pointed to Varon "I want her to give me a flap dance!". "Sorry but waitresses don't give flap dances" scoffed the waitress as she looked over at Varon "Especially not lowly newbie waitresses like her". "Phew!" thought Varon to himself as he grinned while the giant owl continue dancing around Bandit Keith "That was close". "But since she did ruin your birthday cake then I guess it's only fair" said the waitress as she grabbed Varon by the arm "Now get over there and start dancing".
"So boss how are you enjoying your flap dance?" asked Zygor while Varon performed a flap dance for Bandit Keith "Is it everything you were hoping for?"
"WILL YOU STOP ASKING ME THAT?" shouted Bandit Keith as he slammed his fist into the table "This sucks and even morons like you should know that!". Varon was indeed performing a flap dance, but not in a way that Bandit Keith had been hoping for. "Phew it's so hot in this stupid owl costume" muttered Varon as he skipped around Bandit Keith while flapping his arms like crazy "I could bake Cinnabons in here if I wanted!".
Varon was completely unaware that at a lone table not too far from where he was sat a person...a person with a camcorder. "Yes and here we have Varon dressed up as a giant owl" said Dartz who had transported himself to Hooters after finishing his Cinnabon "Well I guess you could say he's one 'sexy bird'". After a few more minutes of dancing like crazy, Varon finally stopped and everyone clapped. Suddenly at that moment the vortex reappeared and sucked Varon in(owl costume and all). "Yeah!" cheered Sid really loud "Now that was one sexy bird!". A few seconds later he was also on the ground, but this time it was thanks to Dartz. "I thought of that first!" said Dartz as he unclenched his fist "No one has the right to use the term 'sexy bird' but me!".
"So I can trade this in for Cinnabons instead?" said Raphael who had found out just how addictive Cinnabons actually were "But why?".
"Have you seen the girls at the corndog stand?" said the teenage boy working the register at the Cinnabon stand "They're hot! I buy those crappy corndogs just to see them!". "So they're that hot?" said Raphael who was about to hand over the gift certificate to the perverted teenager with a pimply face "Then again maybe I'll hang on to this after all". "What?" said the teenager with a look of anguish on his face "B-But you can have Cinnabons instead! They taste way better than those stale corndogs!". At that moment the vortex opened up behind Raphael and Varon fell out of it. He landed face first but luckily he was wearing his old clothes and not the owl costume. "Whoa...who's that?" said the pimply faced teen as he glanced over and noticed Varon "What a hottie!". Raphael looked back and realized that the boy was referring to Varon who had decided to come back. "She's so sexy" said the teenager with a dreamy look on his face "She's way hotter than those corndog girls!". "She is?" said Raphael with a look of shock on his face "On second thought I'll take the Cinnabons instead".
"Hoot..hoot.." said Varon weakly as he tried to pull himself up but it was no use since he was completely dizzy from the fall "Hoot hoo...". Varon tried to sit up but as soon as he did, he just fell over again and hit face on the ground. "I'll get you for this Dartz" groaned Varon as he just rolled onto his side "I'll get you...you perverted old freak..."
"So you think your friend looks like me?" said Amelda very calmly as he suddenly reached into his pocket and pulled out two pictures "Well take a look at your futures"
The two boys just gasped in horror when they saw the pictures since it was worse than they expected. The first picture had Varon lying on the couch in his pajamas looking as if though he hadn't showered in weeks while eating two burritos at the same time. "Hey he looks like you!" laughed the blonde haired boy as he poked the brown haired boy "You've even got the same hairstyle!". "He does not!" cried the brown haired boy "But that guy in that other picture looks like you!". The second picture was a picture of Raphael running around the breakfast table with the back of his pants on fire and Dartz under the table laughing at him. "And you know what the best part is?" said Amelda with a twisted smile as he pointed to Dartz in the picture "You're probably gonna end up working for this guy too!"
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" screamed both boys as they just turned around and ran as fast as they could. The redheaded boy just blinked in complete disbelief as he watched his friends run off into the distance. "I don't think I look like you" said the little boy as he looked up at Amelda with big innocent eyes and a bit of sadness "Do you think I'll grow up to look like you?". The kid looked exactly like Amelda when he had been younger, so he was definitely going to look exactly like Amelda in the future. "Hmm if I tell him the truth he'll probably be traumatized" thought Amelda to himself as he felt a bit of pain in the spots where the kids had poked him "But if I lie then he'll have a happy childhood". Amelda was about to speak when he noticed something in the boy's front pocket: a corndog stick.
"You know what?" said Amelda as he looked down at the little boy "You look exactly like me when I was a kid which means you're gonna look just like me when you grow up!'.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" screamed the redheaded boy as he suddenly ran off in the same direction as he friends "Wait for me guys!". A satisfied smile appeared on Amelda's face and he said "I was going to lie but little punks who poke people with corndog sticks deserve to hear the truth". So after traumatizing the three boys, Amelda decided to go off and hit the stores yet again.