Title: The World through the Eyes of a Basket Case

Author: TWBasketcase a/k/a Kristen

Disclaimer: Do I really have to say it again? It's like rubbing it in my face every time I write it :(

Summary: Andy dropped a bomb, what's going to happen? Lot's of Andy/Allison fluff in this chapter…I know you all want it! Lol.

A/N: Thank you to the following for reviewing: Jenifer, Santafelover, Moonjava, Hannah (my ever faithful and wonderful reviewer!), UnsocialBeautifly (you made my day!), JBFan, Jessesgirl29, and KushelKitten (like always). Thank you all. Please feel free to review again.

WARNING: THIS CHAPTER RATED M (for mature) SO IF YOU ARE IMMATURE, DON'T READ ON!

Chapter 16 – No Regrets

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"Well there were a lot of scouts at my last wrestling meet; scouts from all over the world. I had applied to some schools for an athletic scholarship and I was accepted."

A huge smile spread over my lips, "Well that's amazing, I'm so proud of you!" I hopped on him and gave him a deep kiss and a tight hug. We stayed that way for a couple of minutes before he just held me on his lap.

"Well I'm glad that part made you happy," he said, he still had a shaky voice.

I furrowed my brow in confusion, "Okay," I looked around for a couple of seconds before something dawned on me, "Where exactly did you get accepted, Andrew?"

"University of British Columbia,"

I furrowed my eyebrows again, "uh…Canada?" My voice was very shaky…he couldn't be going that far away, could he? That's thousands and thousands of miles away!

"It's fourth in the top schools of all of Canada…Ally; I'm going away to Vancouver, B.C."

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My eyes widened and I didn't have the composure to even close my mouth. My breathe had caught in my throat and I think I must have been sitting that way for the last few minutes because I didn't even hear Andrew calling my name.

"Ally?...Allison? Can you hear me?"

I shook the cobwebs out of my head and met his eyes once again, "I…uh…" I had no fuckin' idea what to say!

He frowned deeply; the lines in his chin were clearly visible, "I take it you don't like the news very well?"

"Of course I don't Andrew!" I winced at my own reaction and rubbed circles over my temples, "I mean…I'm so happy that you are going to a good school, but…it's so far away!"

He swallowed and raked his fingers through his hair; foggy blue eyes met mine. "I know," he said above a whisper.

Before I knew it my eyes were clouding up themselves, and the tears were making their trails down my cheeks. I had no idea what to say; should I be happy? Should I be upset? What the hell am I supposed to say to that? The first guy that has ever given me the time of day and the first guy I ever fell for was leaving me at the end of the summer. September was just over four months away and somehow I didn't think that was nearly enough time. I was going to go from seeing and talking to him everyday to seeing him for various holidays only. I mean British Columbia was on the West Coast of Canada – over 20,000 miles away – if that isn't considered a long distance relationship then I don't know what is.

"Don't cry, please?" He begged, "It makes it so much harder…I hate seeing you upset."

I managed to stifle a bitter laugh, "I'm not too sure how much harder it could get, Andy." He looked so sad that it shattered my heart. It wasn't very often that my Andy expressed his emotions outright, and seeing him do so made me understand just how sticky this situation is for him.

All it took for me was seeing one tear fall down his soft cheek to before I completely broke. It's hard enough knowing he was leaving, but seeing him upset about me was even worse. I have to keep telling myself to stop being selfish; this is an amazing opportunity for him to succeed in life and I cannot – will not – sit back and make him feel bad about it. I tried as best as I could to compose myself while digging my face into his chest. He was tangling his fingers through my hair as I cried and he rubbed my back softly. It was definitely soothing to say the least; I wanna be as close to him as I can during the time I have left.

After a few moments of letting out my emotions I lifted my head to meet his gaze. He gave me a smile; a smile that was so infectious that it actually made me laugh. This is good for him…it really is…and I'm happy he got into a good school. I know that his grades are not very good so it wasn't like I was expecting Harvard or anything…but Canada? That was a shock; but this school is a top school in the country so I am proud of him even though I am going to miss him terribly.

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"Andy, can I ask you something?"

"Uh…yeah sure, go ahead,"

"What in the blue hell made you want to go all the way to freakin' Canada?"

He lowered his gaze to his knees and let out a soft sigh, "You were there, weren't you?" I furrowed my brow in confusion trying to figure out what the hell he was talking about. "At the wrestling meet, Ally. You heard the conversation I had with my dad, right?"

A blush rushed up to my cheeks rather quickly after his statement; suddenly I feel like I spy or something. I think I ended up hearing a conversation that was a little too personal. "You don't have to be embarrassed, Al, just answer me."

"Yeah…I heard it…but I wasn't trying to eavesdrop or anything I was just looking for you and…"

He interrupted, "That's fine, and I'm not really worried about that. The point is it's my father that made me wanna go far away, and I don't know if it's a good thing to tell you this or not…but it was you and the rest of the group that made me see that." I nodded my head, tears welling up once more. He continued, "For the last three years of my life he has made my school life hell; my social life hell; my home life hell; and most of all my athletic life hell. Do you have any idea what it's like to be so in love with something and have someone pushing you so hard to perfect that love that it's not enjoyable anymore? I have had a hard time enjoying wrestling for awhile now; such a hard time that I forgot how much I really did love it. It was my escape, my exercise, the one constant in my life and my dad almost ruined that for me. In order for me to grow as the person I want to become I knew that I had to get far away."

I gulped and looked into his eyes. I knew already that he was pouring out his heart and I was his shoulder to lean on. That one thing made me very happy, but I still don't know if I'm ready to accept his leaving so well already – not that I would let him know that though.

"I'm not leaving because I don't care about you, and I'm not leaving because I don't care about the rest of my friends; leaving all the people I do love behind is going to be real fuckin' hard for me, Al. I could have stayed behind and gone to Chicago, or Pittsburg, or Indiana to go to school but I came to the realization that I need to do something good for myself. My whole life I have worked so hard – I have strived – to make everyone else happy around me that I forgot about myself. I know now that I need to get away from the place that made me so miserable and the family that made me so miserable to recreate my thoughts and grow to become a happy person again. You taught me that I need to think for myself, and that is exactly what I did."

"Okay…so why Canada then?" This makes a lot of sense, but my heart is still aching.

"Well my older brother had gone to Victoria, B.C. last year for a study on Native Aboriginals. He showed me pictures, and postcards, and told me all sorts of stories about the land up there. That place looks like a paradise! It doesn't get too cold or too hot; there is gorgeous Rocky Mountains out there; all kinds of animals and trees; it's just…it's peaceful. I think that is the kind of environment I need to get myself together again. I can still wrestle, still go to school – everything will be the same except my location." He took a breath and held my hand, "I know I hurt you by deciding to leave, but I want you to know that there is no way that I want to give up what we have. You are one of the good things in my life, and I want it to stay that way." He looked to me for some reassurance.

"Of course…I'm not ready to lose you yet."

He gave me a weak smile and nodded, "Good."

Andy's explanation was good enough on the ears to make me feel a little less empty inside, but my heart still ached for him. His speech was very touching and it made me upset to know that he was really hurting so much. So I decided to change the subject to a somewhat happier note, "So…what are you going to be taking at U.B.C. anyways?"

He gave me a big smile; looking like he was ecstatic for me asking the question, "Actually I decided that I want to major in English…maybe become a Sports columnist or something."

"That would definitely suit you. At least that way you won't have to vent your anger at the TV anymore, you can just vent for the rest of the city to read." We shared a laugh at that and it filled my heart. I love being able to laugh and smile with him; it's the best feeling in the world. I think it was at this moment that I absolutely fell in love with him.

He leaned over and gave me a deep kiss; one that was filled with love, adoration, and passion. We broke apart only when we needed air and continued with dancing tongues. I wrapped my arms around the back of his neck and he wrapped his around my waste so that he could lower me down so I was lying on the bed with him on top of me. I know this is one thing for sure that I am going to miss; the touch of him makes me feel so alive. Every hot breathe on my cheek, every kiss on my collarbone, and every soft caress on the sides of my body made my body ache for him so much more. Andrew and I have a connection so deep that it runs right down to the core of our souls where every beat of the heart is in unison. And to think that just four weeks ago we found each other untouchable; my have the tables turned!

I cupped his cheeks as our lips made contact again, and I could feel him smiling under the kiss. When we stopped for air I paused, "Andy?"

He looked intensely into my eyes with a soft, glazy look; his eyes read of love and understanding, "Yeah?"

I swallowed hard and blushed a little; I could hardly meet his gaze, "Have you ever done it?"

His eyes widened, "Uh…"

"Tell me,"

"Yeah I have…" His eyes left mine, and it almost seemed as if he was embarrassed. I don't want him to feel ashamed because in no way – shape or form – would I judge him…ever.

"I don't mind you know…"

"Why do you ask?" He said suddenly and unsurely. It was my turn to look embarrassed.

"I…uh…I just wanted to know what you thought about it."

He gave me a small smile and started to kiss me again. He pushed my hair back and kissed my neck a few more times before his eyes met mine again, "If you love someone…its okay." I smiled at the line I used that Saturday while sitting on the floor with the group. I had really pulled one over on them and now it was coming back to me.

"And…I love you," He finished as I pushed his jacket over his shoulders and down his arms. He continued staring into my eyes and caressing my face, and I knew for sure that I loved him too. His eyes searched out mine for something – anything – for me to say.

"I love you too Andy…and if you love someone its okay…"

He looked at me intently with a serious expression on his face, "Are you sure?"

I hesitated; I needed to swallow down the bundle of nerves that was forming in my throat and the pit of my stomach, "I'm sure. I know now since you are leaving that I want to be with you as close as I can while I still have the chance."

"I don't want you to think you have to do anything just because I'm leaving."

"It's not that…I need to know that everything will be okay – I need you to love me."

He nodded his head and lowered his lips to meet mine. I know for sure that the saying 'you don't know how much you love something until it's gone' is so true – and I'm not about to have any regrets. He tugged the back of his shirt over his head – our lips only parting long enough for it to come off. Did I ever say that he was absolutely gorgeous? The sight of his hard abs and disheveled hair sent a shiver up my spine, and the touch of his hands on my back as he removed my shirt as well made my heart flutter. As we got more and more passionate, the more excited I became. I know I have never felt this exhilarated before and I do not feel one ounce of fear through my body; I trust him with my life.

When he finally entered me, it hurt a little. The feelings I got were new ones, and this is not at all how I expected it to be; it was better. It only got better and better as the time went by. There were a few moments where I felt very emotional, but just one look into those dazzling blue eyes made it so much more meaningful. Everything was perfect: we moved in unison; I felt very confident with him; and I've never seen him more gentle and loving. The only thing that sucked was the fact that he wouldn't be around for this forever.

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I opened up my eyes and squinted at the street lights that poured over my bedroom walls. I'm not too sure how long I've been asleep, or even when I fell asleep until I felt a warm body move next to me.

"Hey," Andy mumbled. He looked so beautiful with the lights reflecting off of his features. His hair was sticking up every which way and he looked confused.

"Hey yourself,"

"What time is it?" I let out a happy sigh and turned over in my bed, "its 1:30."

"Holy shit…I don't even remember falling asleep. My dad's gonna kill me," He looked as if he was ready to bolt up and run out the door; that was the last thing I wanted.

"Fuck him," I blurted out suddenly

"Huh?"

"Uh…fuck him…stay here tonight, please?"

He softened his gaze and rested his head back against the pillow as he threw his arm around me, "Whatever you want." He kissed the top of my hair and rubbed small circles on my forearm with his thumb. In a few moments his breathing evened out and I could tell that he had fallen back asleep.

A contented smile drew across my face as I laid my head on his chest. He is the most amazing person I've ever met and he has made me the happiest girl alive. Being with him was a wonderful experience but in a way it made me sad knowing that he was to be leaving in four short months. I wish we could just be this way forever, but I know that it's not to be.

I have no regrets.

I'll go to school tomorrow with him, we'll go to the prom in a few weeks, and we will spend the summer together; I'll make the most of our time together as a happy, free-spirited girl and that is what's important.

I closed my eyes a final time before I drifted off to sleep.

TBC