Disclaimer: Marvel's, not mine.

Thanks to the reviewers so far. I will have more time to reply later on. I will be on vacation for the next two months, and will not update until I return. I am posting two chapters to suffice until then.

Oh, and this is an angsty fic. If you hate that genre, you probably shouldn't read this.

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The sun was back out again. In fact, as Remy stepped outside, he thought it was too warm for this time of year.

He let his sunglasses fall down from his hair, shading his sensitive eyes. He could see Ororo in the distance, against the side of the mansion, working on her garden.

"This your doing Stormy?"

She jutted her gardening shovel into the dirt and sat up on her heels.

"It is good to hear you call me that again Remy."

Remy smiled. "You hate dat name."

She stood up, brushing stray dirt from her pants.

"It is funny, my friend, the things you miss once they are gone."

Remy gave a solemn smile, his bangs falling in front of his eyes as he looked down.

"I appreciate de warmth Ro'."

Storm's eyes went downcast in solemn response. Remy knew she had not completely forgiven him, but she would pretend, the way friends often did with one another.

"I'll explain everything Storm."

"Are you coming back then Remy?"

"I'll give it a shot Ro'."

……………………………………………………..

"I have a wife."

He knew that grabbed her attention. Her back went straight against the meeting room chair.

"She was in trouble. She was dying. Essex offered a solution."

"That's why you betrayed us?"

Remy eyed Jean, watching her write notes on lined paper, as if she were his therapist.

"Some people would do anything for love, no Jean?"

"If you loved this woman, why didn't we ever hear about her Gumbo?"

"It wasn't really romantic love Logan. Our marriage was arranged."

Rogue relaxed at this. So she did still care. Of course she did. First loves were never forgotten. Remy wondered if they could even truly end.

"I just," Remy paused. "I cared about her. I left her, and felt I at least owed her her life."

"What about the lives of the Morlocks?"

Remy's eyes swerved menacingly sideways in Iceman's direction.

"I didn't know what was going to happen Bobby."

"Really?" Iceman continued, his casual smile in place.

"Really Drake. I ain't that kinda man."

Bobby snorted.

"Bobby," Jean warned from across the table. She turned to Remy. "Remy, the X-Men are known for giving second chances. If you really want to come back here, you are welcome."

"Why thank you Jean." Remy emphasized his last remark in Bobby's direction.

……………………………………

As the X-Men filed out of the meeting room, Remy followed behind Rogue. She hadn't said a word during the meeting, despite the eyes that had probed her. Everyone had expected her to yell.

Even Remy had been surprised when she didn't.

He moved up beside her in one quick stride. Her cold expression didn't change.

"Why're you doing this Remy?"

Her eyes darted in his direction briefly. Remy looked forward.

"It's just something I gotta do Rogue. For myself."

"Ya looking to wash away a little guilt Remy?" Rogue crossed her arms and stopped walking. The X-Men behind them continued walking, their eyes curiously watching the southerners.

Remy smiled, matching her own sarcastic grin. "Ain't dat why you joined de X-Men chere?"

Rogue bristled, her jaw tightening.

"Ah was nevah responsible for a massacre Remy."

"Non, but I wasn't directly responsible for a single one of dose deaths. Not like you were with Carol Danvers." His gaze became serious, as he watched her color palor at Carol's name.

"What do you want me ta say Remy?"

Remy reached one arm out, his fingers lifting her chin up slowly.

"I just want you to say you're sorry chere."

Rogue drug her chin across Remy's fingers languidly, her eyes half closed as she turned away.

And then she walked away.

Remy's eyes burned, but he smiled at her receding figure anyway.

……………………………………………………….

Rogue shut her door in slow motion. She could feel the voices fighting in her head. Her motions were jittery as she headed towards her dresser.

Most days she felt like she was going crazy. Maybe she was. In front of everyone else though, she liked to pretend like her insanity didn't exist. She knew it was in partial reaction to the pills Henry had given her to help with her control. She hadn't told him of the side effects. She didn't want to lose control again.

She pulled a small vile of whiskey out from her top drawer, unscrewing the cap. Dizzily, she took a long swig. Alcohol shut the voices up.

She laughed. It was loud, and constant. This happened sometimes. She didn't know what was so funny. She sat back on the edge of her bed, taking another gulp of the dark liquid.

She gazed to the side, looking out the window. Something had caught her attention. She wasn't sure what.

Standing up slowly, she moved to the window pane, fingertips lazily resting on the glass, sipping her whiskey.

There he was. Remy LeBeau, her long lost love. She snickered, her eyes narrowing. He was helping Ororo in her garden. It had to be an act. He couldn't possibly forgive the team for what happened.

There was a knock at her door. Rogue jolted, and hid her vile behind her window curtain.

"Come in!" It was hardly a yell. Rogue didn't even turn around.

"Hey Rogue."

"What's up Jean?"

The woman was a telepath. Rogue tried to avoid her eyes, her thoughts.

"I just wanted to talk to you about Remy."

Rogue gave a sarcastic grunt. "That ain't really a topic Ah want to discuss Jean."

"I know," Jean began slowly. "That's why I'm here. Remy is a part of this team now. I need to make sure you can function around him. I can't risk putting the team in danger."

"Shouldn't Ororo be talking to me bout' this?" Rogue let her eyes drift towards Jean, boredom lacing her worn out look.

"Rogue," Jean's expression tightened, hands going to her hips. "You know Ororo is the leader of the gold team. But, I have main leadership authority at the present time."

Rogue nodded, her eyes looking back outside. She didn't understand what she was feeling. Someone would tell her it was extreme guilt, but she would refuse it.

She heard Jean sigh. The woman moved closer.

"Rogue. Look, maybe you should make amends with Remy."

"Make amends with a murderer?"

Jean looked out the window, in Rogue's direction.

"Remy has apologized for his actions," Jean turned around. "Maybe you can do the same Rogue."

As the door shut behind Rogue, she pulled the whiskey vile out from behind the curtain, and took another long gulp.

………………………………………………………….

"Man I could use a cigarette."

Ororo gave a small laugh. "May I ask why you quit my friend? It does not seem like you."

Remy rested the shovel in the soft dirt, leaning against it.

"After Antarctica, I couldn't smoke. I wasn't strong enough. And whenever I tried, it was extremely painful. So, I quit."

Ororo nodded in silent understanding.

"But don't you worry Ro'. One o'dese days, I'll start up again."

Ororo rolled her eyes, and continued pulling weeds.

"It is not a habit I miss Remy."

Remy's eyes wandered up the building, towards the residential wing windows. He could feel eyes on him. Her image was hard to make out by the glare on the window, but the white stripe was unmistakable. Besides, he knew it was her bedroom window.

"So, what was Rogue like after de whole Antarctica ordeal anyway Ro'?"

Ororo let a tiny rain cloud water the soil, her eyes on the dirt.

"She tried to brush everything off at first. Eventually she became distant."

"Did she ever talk about what happened?"

Ororo paused; Remy could hear her bated breath. "No. She held everything in, like she always does. We suffered her actions instead."

"You almost sound bitter Stormy." Remy leaned against the shovel further, smirking.

Ororo wiped her brow, standing back up. She looked Remy in the eyes.

"That is because this team is falling apart."

Remy's smirk slowly disappeared at her serious tone.

"And you blame Rogue for dis?"

"No," Ororo began, "Of course not. But, after Antarctica Remy, no one was the same."

Remy nodded.

"Will you excuse me Ro'? I need some water."

Ororo nodded and returned to her weeding. Remy could see the question in her eyes before she looked to the soil. But she said nothing.

Remy headed back inside. He walked confidently to her bedroom. The door was open a crack, and silently, Remy slipped through, pushing the door lightly with his fingertip.

She was pressed forcefully against the window, her back towards him. Her hair was pulled back now, in a ponytail. And, a vial of whiskey rested between the fingers of her right hand.

Remy stretched himself out across her bed and watched her. Her back went ridged, and in an instant she had spun around, eyes wide, hands clenched.

"How often do y'drink chere?"

Rogue snorted, relaxing her shoulders and shoving the whiskey behind the curtains.

"That ain't your business Remy." She crossed her arms and moved closer. "What are ya doing here?"

As Remy crossed his arms above his head, resting against the head board, Rogue's eyes grazed over his body.

"Did you get what you wanted chere?"

Rogue's eyes flickered back up quickly, turning stern.

"Did you?"

Remy didn't smile, but watched with curiosity as she moved closer.

"Non."

Her arms leaned down on the mattress seductively, her mouth turning in a half smile.

"Well, Ah did sugah. And Ah don't need your guilt."

Remy smirked, and in one swift move his arms were around her waist, pulling her on top of him. She didn't fight it. Remy rolled on top of her. He knew how fast her moods could change.

"I've dreamt about dis for so long chere," Remy whispered, his mouth close to her left cheek. "It's strange de way you fit me."

"Ah nearly killed you Remy." Her breathing was heavy, but her muscles weren't tense and she didn't use her strength to kick him off.

"We both have pasts Rogue. But we can forget dem and move on."

His body was pressed so closely to hers that she couldn't resist. She agreed. Reaching one arm out, she wrapped her fingers around his neck and pulled him in for a kiss.

Remy smiled through the touch of her lips.

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