Disclaimer: I do not own Summerland, nor do I own any related characters or places.

Longing to Know

Chapter 4

They drove silently across town, and Bradin had just stopped the car at the stables when he spoke up. "Is he really your boyfriend?"

Harley sighed and looked down at her hands, shifting uncomfortably. "Yeah."

"I mean, he had that blonde bimbo on his arm all night, and he didn't once acknowledge you were there...until you wanted to leave."

"It's the way it is," she said glancing over at him. "It's no big deal."

"Why don't you dump him?" Bradin questioned.

"I…can't."

"Why can't you?" he pressed.

"Because." Her voice quavered.

"Why?"

There was a lengthy pause before she turned to face him, brushing away a stray tear that had slipped down her cheek. "Do you ever wonder how much it costs to keep a horse here?" She gestured towards the large freshly painted red building. "With that great arena, the irrigated pastures, and the air-conditioned barns—it's a lot of money. My parents don't make that much, and I certainly can't get a job that could allow me to afford keeping Flint here. Yeah, sure, I earn his keep by working here during the summer, but I don't have that much time when school starts. CJ and I have an agreement: I act as his girlfriend in trade to keep my horse here. Do you understand?"

"No, Harley, I don't. I don't understand why you'd put yourself through that just for a horse."

Harley hurriedly got out of the Escalade. "He's not just a horse, Bradin, but I can't expect you to understand anything like that." She slammed the car door and ran for the barn, slipping in through the narrow crack in the sliding door. The sweet scent of grass hay and horse washed over her, comforting her. Running into the tack room, she pulled out a pair of jeans and some boots from her locker and quickly changed in the half-light before turning toward Flint's stall.

"Hey baby boy," she crooned, pushing open the sliding door. "I missed you." In response, the Mustang nickered softly and moved next to her, nuzzling her cheek. "Yeah, I know, horsewomen don't wear makeup."

The distant sound of a car roaring to life signaled to her that Bradin was leaving. She listened until the sound faded from hearing before slipping the halter over Flint's head, and grabbing her carrot stick, saying, "Let's go play outside."

She led the horse from his stall and they walked to the front of the barn where Harley forced the noisy door to slide open, exposing girl and horse to the fresh night air. The pair quickly made their way across the yard and into the large outdoor arena. Untying the blue rope halter, she set the young palomino loose and hung the halter and lead rope on the gate. Carrot stick in hand, she walked to the center of the arena. Motioning for Flint to go to the right, she smiled as he complied willingly at an even trot.

"Good boy," she said happily. The horse's head tilted toward her, listening to her voice. Harley raised her right arm straight out and pointed as she held out the carrot stick in the other; Flint cantered. After two laps, she bent over, focusing on his hindquarters. As he turned, she stood up and trotted backwards gesturing for him to follow at the same gait. One step, two steps; then she pointed with her left arm and Flint cantered off to the left.

In the light of the full moon, the palomino's slick golden coat gleamed brightly as he changed direction at his partner's cues. Harley relaxed her position and Flint slowed to a trot, then to a walk. She bent over to disengage the hindquarters, then straightened and drew him in to her. Rewarding him with long smooth strokes across his neck, she grinned as he turned his head to her and stared at her with his deep brown eyes.

"I love you too, Flint," she kissed his velvet nose. "Can you do a Trigger bow?"

Flint stretched his left foot forward, then leaned back, resting his right knee on the ground and bowing his head to the dirt. Harley slipped onto his back and gave him the cue to rise. He obeyed, straightening up slowly, keeping himself balanced.

"Good boy." She scratched his neck. Breathing her life up started him up and he walked to the rail of the arena. Harley picked up a trot in her body, and Flint followed suit. They trotted gracefully around the arena, then, at cues from her legs, the small palomino turned agilely in the movements of figure eights and serpentines. As they came down the centerline, she breathed out, letting the life out of her body, and Flint stopped. She leaned down to hug his neck and lay there, smelling the warmth and light sweat of the horse's body, allowing herself to close her eyes. Underneath her, Flint shifted his weight and tensed, swiveling his ears toward the gate. Harley pushed herself back to a sitting position and squinted in the half-light, trying to make out what stood in the shadows just beyond the gate.

"I have a gun," she said loudly, not sure if it was more for her benefit than a threat. She knew it was a lie and that whoever or whatever lurked in the shadows could probably tell she didn't have one. Harley raised her voice again, doing her best to knock the fear away, "I know how to defend myself."

"It's just me," –the voice floated through the night air, and the figure stepped up to the gate— "Bradin."

Breathing a silent sigh of relief, she directed Flint to the gate. "You could have gotten yourself killed."

"So could you," he warned her.

"Why are you here anyway?" she asked coolly, changing the subject. She'd been warned time and time again to not ride at night by herself. "I thought you left."

"I did—then I came back to apologize."

Flint snorted as if amused by the statement. Harley looked down at Bradin, waiting.

"Look—I'm sorry. I didn't understand, and I still don't really, but it wasn't my place to tell you what to do, so please accept my apology. And I just wanted you to know that 'surfer boy' won't be bothering you any more. I'm quitting tomorrow." Bradin turned and started walking across the yard.

"You're quitting?" The words managed to creep out of Harley's mouth and Bradin stopped. She slid off Flint's back and climbed over the fence. "Why are you quitting? I thought you were going to work until school started." Harley closed her mouth hurriedly. Why was she pursuing him? The whole time she'd known him, she'd wanted to be rid of him, yet at this moment, she couldn't bare the thought of not seeing him.

He shrugged.

"You don't have to quit—but you can do whatever you want." She turned back to Flint and busied herself with putting his halter on.