Chapter Two: Put to rest

I woke up, the sun pouring through my window and slowly sliding up the sheets of my bed. Today was the day of Kane's funeral. I lay perfectly still, not daring to move. My mind was still hazy as I looked outside my window and listened to all the people shouting and laughing. It just seemed beyond comprehension how on a day like today, that people could be laughing. Today is Kane's funeral and people are laughing, did they mean anything to him? A small voice in the back of my head spoke up, "they didn't know him!"

I swung my legs out of my bed and pushed my hair back out of my eyes, it falling against the side of my face and short, thin crimson strands. I headed into the bathroom and stared at my face in the mirror. My face was gaunt, my eyes red and swollen from the tears. I switched on the shower, the hot water pummeling against the floor. I continued to stare into the mirror as the steam condensed on the mirror, blurring my reflection.

I felt numb on the inside. I had changed. I lifted a finger and dragged it across the mirror, scrawling, 'Do I know you?' along the bottom. I turned and entered the shower, the hot water pouring down my body as I cleaned, relieving my aching bones.

I pulled on my white Sage outfit which had been cleaned and pressed while I had remained in my bed for fourteen days. I knew what I was about to do and my heart rate increased. I opened the door to my room and on the floor was a small brown cardboard box. I picked it up and closed the door to my room, walking over to the bed and sitting down, the cardboard box in my lap. This was it, inside this cardboard box was everything that Kane ever represented, ever was. All his possessions were in this cardboard box.

I took a deep breath and opened the lid to the cardboard box and stared down at what was inside. I lifted out his shirt and held it in front of me, it as pristine as ever, all traces of his death washed out of it. I pulled it to my face and inhaled it deeply, Kane's scent still there. The tears were already falling from my face. Next, there was his slacks, I flattened them on the bed next to the shirt and looked inside the box.

I stared in horror at the contents that were under the slacks. There was a card for his storage, his necklace, a few loose items, his shoes and finally, his Zeny Bag. I picked it up, my hand shaking wildly as I held it. "He had it all this time," I thought. "He never lost it all." I stared at the Zeny Bag, the realization of what this meant finally dawning on me.

He knew I was going to die, he knew. He didn't want me to see so he distracted me and made me go get his Zeny Bag so I didn't watch him die. The tears welled up in my eyes and I curled up on the bed, his shirt and the zeny bag pulled tightly against my chest, crying silently.

It was a few hours before I could pull myself together. I got up and packed everything back into the box apart from the necklace, which I fastened around my neck, the golden letter 'K' for Kane shining in the light. I packed up the box with my possessions and left the room for the first time, walking down the stairs of the Inn and into the crowded in.

I could feel people's eyes on me, but I kept my head down. There were hushed whispers and the conversation ebbed away for a few moments. I walked between the tables, heading towards the exit. I opened the door and the sunlight hit me, causing me to flinch a little. I walked steadily onwards, keeping my head down as I passed the street where I had held Kane in my arms as his life slipped away. I kept my head down as I followed the route that my so-called friends had walked as they turned and left us. I kept my head down as I passed the bar that we had been in.

I turned right and walked away from the bar before heading towards the Comodo center where the Kafra resided. I could see her in the distance, thankfully there was no queue and I walked up to her. She stood with her clipboard in a yellow miniskirt and yellow boobtube, her green hair and green eyes seeming to sparkling in the sun.

"Comodo Kafra Service, how many I help you?" she chimed.
"I'd like to put these in storage." I said, holding out the box and my Storage Card.
"Sure thing she said." Taking them both from me and running them through the necessary checks before returning my card to me. I turned on my heel and began to walk away, hearing her shout, "Please come again" from behind me. I slowly walked towards the merchant arena, my head already buzzing from just speaking to the Kafra.

Upon reaching the merchant arena, I looked at all the little blackboards each merchant had been supplied with to see what they were advertising. I eventually found what I was looking for, new robes. I handed over some of my won Zeny in exchange and continued to roam around, eventually finding a Dye Merchant. The black dyestuffs were quite expensive but it was worth it, myself handing over the necessary zeny.

I walked back to the Inn, ignoring the hushed whispers as I entered again and walked back into my room. I pulled out the dyestuffs and new robes, running some cold water into a basin before soaking the robes. I ground the black dyestuffs some more before pouring it in and using my hands to kneed the robes and dyestuffs together. My head was buzzing, too much to think about as I continued to mix the items, before finally pulling out my now jet-black robes and hanging them on the balcony to dry.

Finally, I headed towards the Kafra to head to Prontera. The Inn refused to take any zeny from me, telling me that it was a complimentary stay due to the problems I had. I was grateful but I didn't really want any charity. I gave the Kafra my storage card and my old white robes, me now donning my new black ones, and asked her to put them in storage. I handed over the zeny and asked for a warp to Prontera.

She smiled at me and put her palms out facing me, a small circle of light appearing beneath my feet, it suddenly rising high into the air. I gasped as I felt the floor vanish beneath me. I felt as if I was floating on air, millions of pale colour colours seemed to fly past my vision, wind rushing against my face before suddenly the floor appeared beneath me and I was slowly lowered. I straightened my hair, wiped my face and stared ahead at the amazingly busy Prontera.

There were merchants lining the streets, shouting and trying to catch anyone's attention. I kept walking, passing the magnificent fountain as water sprayed forth, bursting high into the air. The soft trickle as water landed, before being thrown high into the air again. I stood and stared for a moment, then realizing the time, turned and headed north again, passing a large statue of two giant hands clasped together.

I heard the chime of the Sanctuary to my right and I turned in that direction, as the bells played a mournful tune. I hung my head and kept walking. I stopped as a newly wed couple came running from the Sanctuary, the groom holding his bride by the waist as they ran together, giggling before vanishing into sparkles as they were transported to Jawaii for their honeymoon.

"That could've been me," I thought, staring at the spot where they vanished. I bit my lower lip, walking on slower, standing in front of the large, grey stone building, the bells above chiming even louder. I entered the Sanctuary and headed up the main aisle, passing the confetti covered floor, passing the bustling guests, all laughing and joking and finally coming to the place where the aisles were split.

I sat in one of the pews, my head bowed and my hands clasped together in my lap and muttered a prayer to God, asking for him to give Kane safe travel to his afterlife. Now it was time, I had butterflies in my stomach as I stood up, my legs almost giving way. I clasped onto the top of the pew before me and began to walk along to the top of the aisle, turning right and heading through a door.

The room I entered now was lit by candlelight and lead to a large double-door at the end. I could see the sunlight and as I opened the door I came face to face with a large graveyard. I looked around and saw the Father, wearing a black robe and holding a Bible. He saw me and nodded slightly in recognition.

I walked slowly towards him, between the rows of graves. The tombstones were kept tidy, fresh flowers or ornaments leaning on some of them. As I approached the Priest, I saw the freshly dug up ground, Kane's tombstone, there were no flowers, no decorations. Nobody else had been here. I stopped at the bottom of his Grave, the elderly Priest held upon his book and began to read his sermon.

I stared down at Kane's tombstone, engraved upon it were the words, "Kane Alson, 1985 – 2005". I kept my palms in front of me, unable to hold my tears back as more images of the fun we had together flashed across my mind. The odd sentence said by the priest floated into my head as I watched through blurry eyes.

"For we do not lose when one passes on," the Father continued. I remembered the time Kane let me cling onto his back as he carried me through Morocc Desert. "And this, our brother moves onto somewhere warmer". I recalled the first time we got interested in each other when we were Payon and were playing around in small pond. "And in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. May our brother rest in eternal peace." The image of Kane holding me in his arms as many fireworks exploded behind us, swaying me back and forth as he whispered he loved me appeared in my minds eye.

I made the sign of the cross on my body, my head to my stomach, across my shoulders and in my chest. I whispered "Amen" and took a small flower from my bag, a Witherless Rose and placed it on Kane's grave, wiping my eyes and saying clearly. "Kane Alson, I loved you and I'll miss you." I kissed my fingertips and brushed them across the top of his tombstone.

I turned and thanked the priest, he nodding and returning to the Sanctuary. I stood staring down at Kane's grave, I don't know how long I was there but the clouds had passed over the sun. I reached into my bag and removed Kane's empty Zeny Bag that was given to me with his other possessions. I stared at it for a moment before placing it on his grave and whispering downwards, as if I Kane could still hear me, "I found it…"

I took one last look before turning away and leaving.