As You Like It
Chapter Eleven
Warning: This chapter contains some contain that may be offensive or discomforting for some. Basically, if you're uncomfortable watching Law and Order(especially SVU) then you will be reading this, and I'll take no offense if you stop reading now. This chapter is rated 'R', but has been edited. It shouldn't be a very strong 'R'..but 'R' just in case.
Chapter Eleven: Unfaithful Part Two
The tension in the caves was something that had been unheard of since Claire's kidnapping. Jack sat against the cave walls, knees drawn up, and head in his head. The only sound that came from him was the occasional sigh of frustration. Shannon sat nearby beside Boone, who was out cold in a deep sleep. Charlie paced the floor in front of them almost more frustrated than Jack, if possible. He was obviously very hurt that he hadn't been let on the 'fugitive' talk and, not to mention, lied to for four months. Claire was nowhere to be found, Alex was AWOL as well, and Danielle just sat silently in the corner as she normally did.
"There has to be some reason," Charlie was saying, "some..explaination."
He smacked the palm of his hand with his fist, making everyone flinch.
"I mean," he went on, "why would Kate-"
"She didn't," Jack said suddenly.
Everyone looked at him as though he had just announced the end of the world.
"She didn't do anything," he finished, this time with less force.
"But Boone said-"
"I don't care what Boone said!"
Jack's temper rose again and his fist curled in anger. He couldn't believe that the same people he had been with for four months, the same ones who had trusted him- trusted Kate!- were able to so easily turn their backs. The caves grew quiet again after the outburst until Shannon broke the silence with the question everyone had been wondering:
"So.." she began carefully, "what did she do?"
Glances were exchanged but no one had an answer, except of course, Jack, who wasn't going to spill any time soon.
"She didn't do anything," Jack repeated, standing up.
He crossed the room and picked up a spare towel that was laying on the floor.
"She's innocent," he said, making eye contact with each of them.
"Fine," Charlie sighed and then muttered, "you'd be the one to know anyway."
"What was that?" Jack asked, stopping halfway to his seat and turning to Charlie.
"Nothing," Charlie lied, and glared at Jack behind his back as he continued the walk to the wall.
"Here," Jack said, giving the bottle of water and the towel, "use this if he starts sweating again.
Shannon nodded and took the supplies.
"So if Kate didn't do it," Charlie said though he sounded like he didn't believe the statement at all, "who did?"
"I did," a voice behind them replied.
A few random cavers who had just stepped back into the scene and Shannon and Jack turned their heads while Charlie spun around to find that their newcomer was Locke. Immediately Jack got to his feet and stepped in between the distance between him, Locke, and Charlie.
"Is this just some game to you?" Jack began. "'Oh, I can knock out whoever I want because Jack can take care of him?' It's not an easy thing to do, John."
"I know that," Locke replied simply, "I don't play games. I probably see the reality of the situation more than any of you."
This caught more than a few survivor's attentions, including Danielle, who looked taken aback at the accusation.
"It's so obvious what's going on, but you won't accept what's happening," he said, pointing at Jack.
"I don't even know what you're talking about," Jack said in his defense.
"Exactly," Locke said. "This thing that's happening to us? We can't control it. What we've got to do is figure out how to stop it and how to get an upper hand in this place."
The silence of the caves was much like the silence of a math class that didn't have a clue as to what their teacher just taught them. Charlie finally spoke up.
"What thing?"
The castaways parted ways as Locke crossed the room and knelt down beside Boone. Jack took a subconscious step forward, ready to attack if it was needed. Locke carefully removed Shannon's hand from Boone's neck to reveal the bloody spots. Those few who hadn't seen them before or in passing gasp, while others didn't seem to know who Boone was. Jack couldn't help but to notice at that moment that Boone was a full shade paler than he had been before. Locke looked up to Jack with his answer:
"This," he said, "do you know what this is?"
"No," Jack admitted, shaking his head.
"This is a sign," Locke explained, "a sign that something we're doing isn't right."
"And what aren't we doing?"
It was hard to tell if Charlie was confused, disturbed, or both. Jack was sure of one thing though: whatever the 'sign' was came from Locke and whatever he and Boone did in the jungle all day.
"Seeing clearly," Locke answered, "looking at this the way we're supposed to, doing what we're supposed to be doing."
"And what are we supposed to be doing?" Jack challenged.
"I don't know," Locke said, hands in his pockets as he lightly tilted back on his heals, "you tell me."
A steady silence followed and people looked from Jack to Locke, expecting and wanting further explanation. But whatever the answer was, Jack didn't have it. Shaking his head he turned, heading for his cave.
"Where are you going?" Charlie inquired.
The tone of Charlie's voice depicted his agitated feeling for the group at the moment.
"I'm taking a break," Jack responded, sidestepping a group of bewildered castaways.
"What the bloody hell for?" Charlie demanded.
"Because I can!" Jack exclaimed like a three year old and smacked the side of the cave wall as he entered the mapped off room, causing everyone(including Locke) to jump.
After Jack was gone, Shannon groaned and rolled her head to the side, and Charlie threw his hands up, sighing. Locke quietly departed, receiving many glares and looks of fear as he left. Claire walked in as Locke exited, and immediately sensed the tension of the caves.
"What's going on?" She asked Charlie, who finally sat down.
Charlie ran his hands over his face and then through his sweaty hair, and sighed.
"It's nothing," he lied.
"You don't have to lie to me," Claire said, sitting down beside him, "I'm not one of those fragile, depressed women."
"It's a long story," Charlie said, not wanting to get into it.
"Fine," Claire muttered and turned away, playing with her hair.
Charlie watched as she took a strand of hair and waved it together. She then carefully undid the braids only to plait the strand once more. Claire repeated this process a couple of times, causing Charlie to grow restless. Why did girls do useless things like that?
"Want me to get out my guitar?" Charlie asked, interrupting their momentary silence.
Claire shrugged, obviously lost in thought.
"Act any more excited and I'll do a dance," Charlie mumbled.
He reached behind him, thinking his guitar was there, but instead his hand fell on one of Claire's bag. Instead of feeling the soft fabric of her clothes, Charlie's hand landed on something hard and jagged. Curious, Charlie made sure that Claire wasn't looking, and carefully pulled the object out of the bag.
The object turned out to be a small statue of the Virgin Mary, a scene Charlie had seen many times before, but it somehow felt odd to see it on a deserted island. He gasped as his hand begin stinging out of nowhere, and looked down to see a small cut in the inside of his index finger, like a paper cut. Charlie wiped the blood off on his jeans and turned the statue over to find that someone had smashed it open. With caution, Charlie dug into the center of the glass and dug out a small bag half-filled with white powder. Immediately he recognized the substance. He took a deep breath, knowing that the anticipating conversation wasn't going to be easy for either him or Claire.
"What are you doing?"
Claire's voice made Charlie jump. The statue slipped from his sweaty hold, but luckily fell on the bag instead of hitting the ground. He turned around, half-smiling innocently.
"What's that?" Claire asked, eyes narrowing. "Were you going through my stuff?"
"What?" Charlie said, taken aback. "No! No Claire I was just-"
"Forget it," Claire said, gathering her stuff.
She looked so hurt and betrayed that Charlie wanted to slap himself. He didn't even think to go after Claire until she had already excited the caves. Running past the cavers(many who called out "Hey!" or worse when he tripped over them), Charlie made it to Claire just before she turned into one of the many paths that would've lost her to the jungle.
"Claire, stop!" Charlie pleaded.
Claire didn't even turn around.
"We need to talk!" Charlie tried.
"About what?" Claire called behind her. "Your secret life as a thief?"
Charlie finally caught up with her. He could've sworn she had slowed down once she heard his voice.
"About this," Charlie said, spinning Claire around and showing her the bag of drugs.
Claire looked down at the bag of drugs like one would look at a gun just before they killed themselves. Then she looked away quickly, avoiding Charlie's eyes.
"Claire," he said quietly.
Claire's eyes clouded with tears before she finally admitted to the crime.
"I only tried it once!" She cried. "And..and it really seemed to help. I was happy again!"
Charlie's face fell.
"I thought you were happy with me," Charlie said softly, feeling like someone had just knocked the wind out of him.
"You don't understand it!" Claire exclaimed through tears. "You have no idea what it's like to love something for so long and then to have it just ripped from you!"
"Do I?" Charlie said with a little more force than he meant to have. "My band? That was all a joke! It was just a bloody excused so that my darling brother can go out and live some wild party life!"
Claire stared at him with swollen red eyes and a tear-streaked face, seeming to be suddenly interested in his story.
"So he could get rich and stoned!" Charlie continued. "And then I started believing that that was maybe the way to go! He brainwashed me into becoming this sick icon, and for a while, we actually pulled it off! And then no one cared about this blood group called 'Driveshaft' anymore! So we part ways and Liam decides that now it's okay to do the right thing! And so here I was, this pathetic has-been who had nothing to do but to lay in his apartment all day and search the couch for money for his next fix!"
Charlie stopped to catch a breath, and ended up heaving from the outburst. Once he could breathe easily, Charlie finished his argument.
"Don't do this Claire," he concluded softly, "don't end up like me."
Claire took a good look at Charlie before diverting her eyes back down to the ground. Reaching up, Charlie stroke the strand of hair Claire had been braiding, now slightly curly instead of straight, but it didn't matter to him either way. Finally Claire spoke up.
"Why didn't you tell me?" She asked, just above a whisper.
"I did," Charlie said, "but that was before-" he waved away the rest of the statement, "you know."
Claire nodded and looked back down. When she turned to him again, Charlie was surprised to see that she was half-smiling, wearing almost a smirk.
"So I guess I'm an idiot," she said.
"Just a bit," Charlie said, and then started laughing, "I think we're getting influenced by all these Americans."
"As long as you don't start saying 'yall'," Claire said, joining in the laughter.
As it died away Charlie found himself deprived of conversation ideas. It was then he noticed Claire eyeing the bag of drugs, almost seeming afraid of it.
"We're going through this together," Charlie said, taking Claire's hand.
She hesitated and then nodded in agreement.
(space)
Shannon was the only one still awake when Jack woke up. He had fallen asleep unintentionally, and it took a moment to remember why Kate wasn't laying beside him. He decided then and there to go after her, and use whatever it took to bring Kate back. Jack noticed as he walked to the waterfall that even though Boone was still out, he looked better, now not as pale and breathing easier. Running his hands through the water, Jack splashed his face, letting the cool fresh water revive him. He then to a deep breath, readying his apology to Shannon.
"Sorry about that earlier," Jack said truthfully, "I didn't mean to lash out it's just.."
"I know," Shannon said, not looking at him and sounding as if she really couldn't care what Jack had to say.
The fact that she was still up told Jack that there was one thing Shannon was worried about: Boone. Squatting, Jack examined the bloody dots on Boone's neck that were now looked like nothing more than scratched chicken pox scars.
"What do you think that is?" Shannon asked Jack for the dozenth time that day.
"I'm not sure."
But now that Jack thought about it, he recognized those bumps. He had seen them before, that day in the jungle with Kate..Sayid had come up to him..asked if he recognized the rash. Some rash.
"Sayid.." Jack said, remembering more in more of the scene.
Shannon's head jerked up at the name. Jack stood and began looking around for some kind of weapon.
"What?" Shannon asked, watching him. "What's going on?"
"Stay here," Jack instructed, walking into his cave to look for his gun, "watch over Boone."
"Jack-" Shannon tried desperately.
She jumped up and followed him. At last she stopped Jack at the cave's entrance, and held her hand out.
"Let me do it," she proposed.
For a moment Jack looked like he was going to protest, but then nodded. She took the gun but didn't bother turning on the safety. They both knew what needed to be done. It might not've been the safest thing to do, but at the moment it was the only solution they had.
(space)
Sawyer and Kate laid wide awake just after the sun went down. There'd definitely be no sleeping for either of them that night, no more than they already had, at least. Sawyer's right hand was wrapped around her neck, his left around her chest. Kate's hand lay on top of his, and they had been laying like that for hours, watching the sunset. Neither was brave enough to say anything.
Even though Kate was eating herself up with guilt, an eighth of her had to admit that there was something there between her and Sawyer that night. But was that 'something' stronger than her and Jack's 'something'? She had been contemplating the question the entire night, even before they had fallen asleep, though they couldn't of been out for more than an hour. Even Sawyer seemed swallowed up in self guilt. It did take two to make an affair.
Affair. Kate was really beginning to hate the word. She was beginning to hate herself. Sawyer. And even Jack. Why didn't Jack run after her? Her eyes began to swell with tears just thinking about it. She sniffed to block them, and felt Sawyer's grip grow slightly tighter, but in not in a harmful way, more of a protective way as in saying "I'm there for you". Kate struggled to wipe her eyes with her sleeve, and was careful not to meet Sawyer's gaze when she looked back up.
"Jack was married," Kate said, speaking quietly.
Why she felt she needed to talk about Jack, she didn't know. Part of her felt it was right while the other was sickened, much like Kate herself. She felt that if Sawyer were to tightened his hold even more, she'd puke all over his jeans.
"I don't really know the story," Kate half-lied, "but I think it ended badly."
Sawyer didn't reply. She couldn't be sure that he was listening, or even wake. Underneath her, Sawyer breathed in heavily and then let it out, and Kate figured that that was supposed to be a sign he was listening.
"When I was in Australia's I stayed with this farmer," Kate said, feeling the sudden need to take the subject off Jack, "he was this really great guy, older though."
"Guess you were out of luck," Sawyer mumbled sarcastically.
Kate snorted.
"He was the one who turn me in," Kate finished, ending the conversation in an unnecessary dark tone.
"Oh," Sawyer replied simply.
"When I first met Jack it was on this beach," Kate said as though she was continuing the same subject of conversation, "he had this wound on his back from the crash..he wanted me to stitch it up."
What was she doing? She psychologically couldn't part herself from talking about Jack, no matter how wrong it was.
"It was like we clicked from the start," Kate continued, recalling, "he didn't know who I was..yet he still trusted me with his life."
"Doesn't seem like he had a choice," Sawyer pointed out.
"Would you of helped him?" Kate asked, raising an eyebrow though he couldn't see her.
"I probably would've shot him," Sawyer admitted with a chuckle.
Kate laughed a little as well, though there was nothing funny about the comment.
"He has a kid," Kate blurted out before she could stop herself.
She felt Sawyer skip a breath underneath her.
"What?" He said slowly.
"This little girl..she's maybe two," Kate said, chewing on her lower lip, "she has blonde hair..and her eyes look just like his."
"That's what the world needs," Sawyer muttered, "a mini-Jack."
"He showed me a picture," she went on, "she's beautiful."
"But he's not married?" Sawyer asked, taking the information in.
"No," Kate whispered, "he didn't even know about her until just before the crash.
"Oh."
After the confession, neither felt like talking even now more than ever. She probably didn't help any guilt Sawyer was holding, let alone, her own. Her eyes felt like a pool of pressure water. She wouldn't let herself let lose in fear of Sawyer seeing her in this state, which only reminded her that had she been with Jack, she would've. Shivering, Kate felt herself growing cold in nerves, and she couldn't even find the energy to protest when he leaned down and kissed her head.
(space)
Alex and Kyle had been walking the island all afternoon. Kyle had asked for her to just put her trust in him so that he could take her on his own little tour, resulting in tripping over tree limbs, getting lost numerous times, and nearly getting crushed by a dead squirrel that had fallen from a tree.
"Thanks for the tour," Kyle said, "earlier, I meant. Thanks for introducing me.
"No problem," Alex said, "and thanks for um..thanks for not twisting both of my ankles."
"Cute," Kyle smirked, "you know you saw that fall coming."
Alex grew quiet in realization that she still hadn't told him about the psychic thing.
"I think this is our path," Kyle said, stepping onto a path that barely stuck out of the grass and mud below.
No senses or guy feelings told her differently, so Alex had no choice but to follow him. It was weird being around Kyle. Around him, she was a different person. She was normal. There were no visions, no empathy, no ghost or spirits smiling at her. She jumped slightly when she felt him brush against her while trying to take the lead in the hike. They had been walking close together..almost a little too close, but it seemed like every time she tried to inch away, Kyle made up for loss space and soon she was sure that he would simply step inside her body. All of a sudden Kyle stopped and looked up.
"What?" Alex asked, frowning.
She looked where he was looking, but only saw the dark branches of a large tree. Something soft and wet brought her gaze back eye level, and it took a moment for Alex to recognize it as a kiss. He had kissed her, just like that. Kyle stood smiling in front of her, clearly proud at his accomplishment, while Alex just felt sick. Maybe she wasn't as ready as she thought she was for another relationship.
"You're a pretty girl," Kyle commented, "Adam was lucky."
"Thanks," Alex said quietly, insides closing up at the sound of his name.
Kyle must've felt lucky last night, either that or thought the compliment deserved an award, because he came in for another kiss. This time Alex kept her lips pursed, refusing to react back. She pushed him back a few steps with her hands.
"No," she whispered, "not yet."
"Why?" Kyle asked, hurt.
She could've sworn he was trying to pull a puppy dog face. Alex couldn't answer. Why not? Here she was, cringing at Adam's name, but then again, Kyle was probably the last chance at a relationship she'd ever get. Her silence must've hinted to Kyle that she had changed her mind, because he was kissing her once again, and she felt herself being pushes slightly back as he kissed her on the lips, neck..
"Stop," she muttered weakly, trying to pull back.
But now Kyle had her pinned back against the tree, and had gained full advantage. His hot breath caused her to choke as he continued to go about his way, making like kisses trailing from her neck to her shoulder.
"Kyle.." Alex tried again desperately.
"Be quiet," he warned as he run his mouth over hers again, and Alex could feel teeny bumps developing on her neck.
Tears began to form in her eyes because Alex new what was happening, but she was unable to stop it. Kyle's hand was now across her face, holding her back. She couldn't breathe. And then an idea came to her. With all the strength she could muster, Alex swung her head forward, head bunting him with a force that cause Kyle to bite down on her lip in surprise- hard. She was sure she received more pain from the impact than he did. Something soft and liquidy began developing inside her jaw, and there was no doubt in Alex's mind that it was blood.
(space)
Sayid groaned ass the cool water hit his head.
"I still don't see why you had to hit me so hard," he complained.
"Just hold still," Shannon said, trying to make a temporary bandage for Sayid's head wound.
Shannon hated to admit it, but part of her felt a sense of pride at being able to take out an ex Iraqi soldier.
"There," she said, putting the last piece of tape over the cotton ball, "that should hold for now."
Sayid leaned his head back against the tree behind him and sighed, unable to believe at the sickness he had allowed himself to fall prone to. Shannon knew he probably needed some time to think things over, but she was also anxious to get back to Boone.
"We should go," she suggested, "Boone's at the caves. Locke knocked him out and well..let's just say Locke hits harder than me."
"Right," Sayid chuckled, and let Shannon help him stand to his feet.
But he still wasn't ready to go just yet.
"Remember anything?" Shannon asked hopefully.
Sayid shook his head, frustrated.
"Well, you didn't miss much," Shannon said, "except for Boone telling everyone about Kate-"
"What?" Sayid said, suddenly alert.
"Let's save that story for later," Shannon said, "I don't want to have to tell it a gazillion times."
Sayid nodded in understanding. Taking the silence that followed as a hint that Sayid was ready for the trip back, Shannon threw her hand over his shoulder to help him walk. Normally Sayid wouldn't of needed this kind of assistance, she knew, but she insisted simply because of the fact that Sayid hadn't actually been in his own mind in almost two days. They had only traveled a few steps before they heard a struggled scream, a thud, and a series of sobs and whimpers. Sayid ignored every instruction Shannon had given him, and took off bolting towards the person in trouble. Shannon was barely able to keep up, but was wishing she had just gone for help to the caves instead.
(space)
Alex moaned at the impact of Kyle's elbow jamming her mouth. She certainty wasn't going to look pretty after this. If there was an after this, that was. But her scream must've got somewhere because a wave of air hit her as Kyle was pulled away. The boy screamed pain following a loud clunk. She gasped for breath as her heart pounded, and Alex slid to the ground where she sat, defeated, with her head hung to the ground and hands over her eyes, sobbing. The next thing she knew someone was whispering next to her, telling her that everything was going to be okay. After a moment she recognized the voice as Sayid's, and realized that someone besides herself was crying.
"Sayid.." someone whined, "I want to go back."
That voice belonged to Shannon. She sounded traumatized and even a little sick. Alex sobbed heavily again, this time in embarrassment. Not only had she not been able to defend herself, able to stop it all from happening, but now there were people here to witness it, and Shannon, of all people, as one of them.
"It's okay," Sayid whispered in a soothing voice, "I won't let him hurt you again."
"Probably because you shot him!" Shannon cried through tears.
Sayid ignored her, and continued whispering the same soothing words, though Alex could barely comprehend them. The empathy was back, and Shannon's emotions were weighing down on top of her own. All she wanted to do was dissolve into a tiny puddle..though she knew in her case it would probably be puddle of blood.
"Do you think you can stand?" Sayid asked her after a few minutes.
Alex shook her head, and she heard Shannon groan. Man she wanted to slap her right now. Sayid sighed, but with patience. She flinched as he pulled the now drenched hair away from her face, though she could tell it was something Sayid had been reluctant to do, knowing it might make her feel uncomfortable after what she just went through. She knew Sayid was wanting to make some kind of eye contact with her, so Alex tried the best she could through tears to do so.
"We need to get you back to camp," he told her, "I'm going to take you to Jack."
"No!" Alex whispered hoarsely, surprising Sayid. "No..please..you can't tell."
The last thing she wanted was the rumor of being weak, for even more glances of hatred and disgust thrown towards her. This time, she made sure she made eye contact with Sayid.
"Please," she pleaded desperately.
Sayid sighed again but then nodded in agreement. He looked up to Shannon.
"Can you help her walk?" He asked her.
Shannon looked as though someone had just asked her to swallow a bug, but nodded all the same.
"Do you want to wait and have me go, or can you make it with Shannon?" Sayid asked her.
"I'm fine," Alex whispered.
It was probably the biggest lie she had ever told, but all she wanted right now was to crawl in a corner somewhere, and do everything she could to forget the past fifteen minutes- the longest fifteen minutes of her life. She was still seeing images of herself in a coffin..her grave..Alex shivered. Sayid helped her stand a little sooner than she was ready to do so, but she wasn't going to let them down now. Kyle had ripped the shoulder of her t-shirt, and the once cool night now seemed to have dropped thirty degrees. In what seemed liked days Alex walked over to Shannon, who now accepted the mission with a small smile.
"Let's go," Shannon whispered a few seconds later.
She and Shannon began the long walk back to camp, but as they went Alex forced herself to turn behind her where Sayid was kneeling beside Kyle, examining something on the boys leg. It was hard to see exactly what Sayid was looking at at night, but when the clouds uncovered the moon at the very last second, Alex saw that Kyle's leg was covered with tiny, blood red mosquito bites.
Author's Note: And yes that means he had(or has, you never know) the sickness. Wow, that had to be the hardest chapter I've ever had to write. I wanted to add a sense of darkness to the plot, and I really wanted to go into how severe this sickness could actually be. FYI, Kyle was based off of The 4400's, Kyle Baldwin who spent the second(and first?) season with something inside him that gave him blackouts, and during those that something could control what he did- including murdering a guy. Thanks so much to all you who reviewed! You have no idea how much that means to me! You guys rock!
Coming up next, in "As You Like It":
While I'm in Alias denial, Alex is in a different kind of denial, and is very reluctant to let others in, even Jack. This might be the last chapter, but I'm not sure. All I have to say is that as of now, things won't be "as you like it"..except maybe if your a PB&J shipper).
By the way, something was said in that last bit of chapter that shouldn't of made sense to you at all, and gives a huge hint as to how the whole series ends.
Thanks agiain!
Until next time..
October Sky