Oh yes! I'm back! Goodness me, it's been about six months. :slaps hand:

Thank you very much to Crumbly Crumpet for the inspiration. Loves!

CRUMBLY CRUMPET'S FICLET

Crumbly Crumpet was riding a horse. Suddenly, along came a clam.

'Hello,' said the clam. 'My name is Claggy Clam. May I please have a balloon?'

'I'm sorry,' said Crumbly Crumpet, 'but I don't have a balloon. Have a mini candle instead.'

'NO! NO MINI CANDLES!' screamed Claggy Clam, as he spontaneously combusted and turned into a coaster.

As you can see, at the moment, my favourite letter is C. Now that moment's gone, and I'm on to other letters.

FICLET 16

Gimli was eating a samosa when along came Matt Damon.

'Matt Damon,' he said.

'Gimli,' said Gimli.

'Matt Damon,' said Matt Damon.

'Very well thank you,' said Gimli.

'Matt Damon.'

'It's a South Asian fried food item, generally consisting of triangular pastry shell with potatoes and pea stuffing. It is spicy and is often eaten with chutney,' replied Gimli.

'Matt Damon.'

'No.'

FICLET 17

Aragorn was off hunting rabbits for dinner. He caught one, and skinned it. Then they cooked it over a fire with rosemary and ate it. And that's the end of that.

FICLET 18

The spirit of the dead rabbit came back in the form of a twig, which Aragorn snapped as he stood on it while hunting for more rabbits.

FICLET 19

The spirit of the dead stick which had belonged to the dead rabbit came back in the form of Sam's hat, which Aragorn accidentally knocked down the Rauros Falls.

FICLET 20

The spirit of the rabbit/stick/hat was now very annoyed at Aragorn. So the spirit returned as an orca, which tried to kill Aragorn, but being a sea creature of extraordinary size but lacking in opposable thumbs, not only was it unable to hold anything with which to kill Aragorn with, but it promptly found itself gasping for air and dying.

FICLET 21

By this point the departed spirit was so fed up it just gave up on life in any form at all, and ran away to the Elysian Fields with that guy from Human Resources at the Air Canada Centre.

Well, they were about the most boring ficlets I've ever written. Ideas, anyone?